What is it with gay guys and drugs?

[bigdick4you]

Seems like lately on hook up sites I can't find any hook ups who don't party.... I'm very anti drugs myself....I only use poppers for sex. I used not to mind if guys would use drugs during sex.... But lately it's a downright turnoff...can't stand the dumb tweaker talk and the moving all over the place and the stops to take more drugs....people smell badly as well and sweat a lot! The whole think is disgusting! On many occasions I had to kick tweakers out of my hotel room...what do u guys think.... Where does this trend cum from?

[seaguy]

Straight people use drugs too.

[bearbandit]

Drugs make you feel good and once you're shitfaced you don't care what damage they might be causing. The solution is to leave them alone, especially the ones that have a fast dependence cycle. A friend of mine was moving house when he found a bag of mephedrone. Despite a year's abstinence he thought "once wont hurt". It did.

[rawTOP]

Straight people use drugs too.

Agreed, plus drug addicts spend a lot more time having sex than sober people…

But, a lot of times drug use comes from other personal issues and with things like family rejection, issues at work, etc. gay men just have a lot more personal issues than straight folk.

I'm watching Dexter at the moment and I'm up to the point where he has a kid and he's burning candles at both ends and dropping a lot of balls in the process. The fact that gay guys aren't typically pulled in all directions by family obligations means we can do things that are more "indulgent" and "irresponsible" if we choose to. Drug would be part of that.

[pozpig]

I agree with you. I find sex with a guy who's amped up on tweek to be a turn off. Most of the guys I've played with who were tweeked had such a hard time focusing on playing, that it was almost a challenge just to keep their attention. Then of course you have to be concerned if they can even bother to get hard. Personally, I'm quite anti-drug and have never had even the slightest desire to try. I also want to maintain as clear of a head as possible so I can remember the hot times I have engaging in sex with guys (most I don't even know names/faces).

[totalasspig]

I'm very anti-drug myself.

I know five friends that meth took over their lifes and it's because of one of them that my credit was compromised from him grabbing shit from my wallet during a nights stay.

One day I was standing in Walgreens and there was a guy standing there wanting to purchase needles - I could tell he was a meth user and he barely had enough money to even get the needles and even the pharmacist told him "You really need to get some help" and he said "Once I shoot up, I'll have all the help I need".

The Gay party circuit is mostly about acceptance - just like it was back in Junior High or Middle school you smoked cigarettes to get with the "in crowd" or did other stuff like pulled fire alarms or harassed teachers or bullied others. If your don't party, guys want nothing to do with you.

Such a shame, guys need to grow up!!

[seaguy]

I think allot of substance abuse and alcoholism in the gay community comes from the fact that many have to grow up in less than ideal settings being bullied in school, harassed at home. When your stuck in a situation where your dealing with homophobia or maybe your closeted drugs and alcohol are and easy escape from the pain, but then they can catch you off guard and become a bad addiction that is causing the pain.

[Pig Bottom]

I don't get the use of drugs, but I"m not an addict or alcoholic.

I was in a gay group once where we all wrote down out deal breakers, and drugs was pretty much on everyone's list.

When a friend of mine told me he had done meth and him and his boyfriend were doing it on occasion it saddened and troubled me. Eventually the friendship went to shit.

I met a guy recently and he told me when he lived in NY when he was younger he used to doi drugs, that was not a deal breaker for me because it was in his past and he learned that drugs are bad mmmkay.

I have some other friends that smoke week on occasion. I see nothing wrong with it. I don't do it because I don't like it, but I still think it should be legal.

Edited December 31, 2013 by Pig Bottom

[rawTOP]

If you're not familiar with what's going on in Portugal you should take a read…

http://www.spiegel.de/international/europe/evaluating-drug-decriminalization-in-portugal-12-years-later-a-891060.html

They've decriminalized all types of drugs. Drugs are still illegal, but they're the status of a parking ticket now provided the amounts are under certain levels. And here's a quick run down of the results…

The data show, among other things, that the number of adults in Portugal who have at some point taken illegal drugs is rising. At the same time, though, the number of teenagers who have at some point taken illegal drugs is falling. The number of drug addicts who have undergone rehab has also increased dramatically, while the number of drug addicts who have become infected with HIV has fallen significantly.

We all need to think differently about the drug problem. I know it bugs me to no end all the drug use in the gay community. Initially I put the chem sex section here in part just to segment the conversation. I'm not sure if it does good or harm… It's my hope that through talking about it people put themselves at lower risk or understand the risk they're taking. But I don't know really.

[Sfmike64]

It's funny, I think the use of crystal meth has dropped substantially here in San Francisco since I was a heavy user of it 10 years ago, (in my late 30s). It seems to me that it's very looked down on and much more hidden than it used to be. Sure, it's not hard to find guys who party but it's a lot less prevalent than it was a while back. Other drugs (Ecstasy, GHB, etc) are still around, but I also think that use has dropped off, or maybe it's just my getting older and being very disconnected from any dance/party scene.

Drugs aren't just a problem for gay men, they are a problem for all sectors of society, we're probably a little more likely to be drug users (or heavy drinkers, fags in SF have NOT stopped drinking booze) than your average person, but it's easy to hide behind platitudes about being bullied or whatever. People (not just gay men) have to take responsibility for who is in their lives (if you don't want people who take drugs around you don't be friends with them) and what substances they put in their bodies.

I started using meth heavily after a horrible breakup (it's good for numbing your feelings) but got my shit together after about 18 months.

[Bttm2go]

I don't mind poppers or 420...interesting that 420 is legal but poppers are not...not really into guys that are partying. If they are, then I'm topping.

[msclverspg]

feel free to rape the shit out of me when Im fucked up

[toxiclover]

Rawtop, you make a very good point with the Portugal example. The data supports legalization helps public health.

I am 100% in support of legalization. I also believe T use amongst other things is out of control in some sectors of the gay community. Its almost like another plague.

[BBRob]

I can't deal with tweakers & drug users, they're always acting a fool & can't be trusted. Plus, everything they do is the drugs talking & not them. Plus I just don't feel safe around someone who's partying. Poppers are okay with me, maybe 420, but as someone who tried drugs way back & hated it, it didn't take me long to realize they weren't for me & I won't be around anyone else who's using them. They'll ruin your life, gay or straight, they don't discriminate.

I met a guy recently who was tweaking & apparently thought I'd be cool with it, but I wasn't so I excused myself. He clearly hadn't showered in days & looked & smelled awful. I have empathy for those dealing with it, but I always ask someone up front before I meet them if they party or not, so I know whether to meet them or not. It's not worth it, plus, there's plenty of insatiable bottoms out there who are sober anyway

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

I just invoked the block on bbrt for a guy who was heavily into tweaking. Every communication was gibberish. I gave it a few days, but he just kept at it. Got taken by one trick during our week long communication; and wonders why bad things happen to him (wallet stolen, etc). He was still pushing to get together (between the fog). I eventually cut him off from aps and hookup sites.

On one hand, I really don't care if a guy enhances. That's a fairly common human condition. But it is one thing to party up occasionally, and quite a different thing to be so into the addiction that even normal conversation is impaired daily for a week.

BBRob, yes, no shortage of sober bottoms here...