Recently Pozzed Guy Gets Into Gift Giving

[rawTOP]

Note: This story may seem really disturbing, but there's something about it that conveys what it was like to fuck bareback before ARVs. It also communicates the power a poz top had over the guys he fucked... It's more of an instructional/cautionary tale than anything...

----------

I've been POZ since '91. I've been one of the lucky ones who never did get sick—at least not seriously. Back then I was so young and scared. There were no cures nor cocktails. AZT, with its chronic side effects, was a joke. Testing POZ was a death sentence. You were consoled by a doctor or counselor, who said you could still lead a long and productive life—if you took care of yourself. I guess that was to make you feel better. Then you looked around, and reality struck you in the face. Friends were dying at an alarming pace. If that weren't enough, AIDS was a shameful disease—a fitting finale to an immoral life. You got what you deserved—that's how they felt. Overwhelmed by my dismal state of mind, I attended a Support Group—one of the more counterproductive missteps of my quixotic life. It was horribly depressing—surrounded by guys with one foot in the grave. I watched with horror and repugnance as they dropped like flies. I was losing friends faster than I could make them. The Support Group only fueled my anger and disgust. With trepidation I scrutinized myself for signs of HIV—night sweats, fever, blemishes, and wasting. They never came, but all around me guys continued to die. Often the simple act of having sex was a death sentence, for you never knew who had it. That uncertainty, coupled with self-imposed abstinence, and a hyperactive sex drive made lapses and slip-ups inevitable. Plus there was a small group of us who purposely continued to fuck raw. Perhaps we secretly coveted the Bug—but to deliberately infect someone was taboo.

I kept hearing about certain POZ miscreants who fucked raw and lied about their status; and other more forthright, if misguided, souls who'd vowed to take as many with them as they could. Though I found such irresponsibility abhorrent, IT TURNED ME ON! I was barely 3 months pregnant when I confronted the Unspeakable. I fucked a sailor from a nearby base. He asked if I was SAFE, and I outright lied. I remember the excitement pulsing through my groin as I slid my bare Cock in his tight Mancunt. I remember thinking how naive he was to take me at my word. He was the first sacrificial lamb to fall victim to my ruse. It would ruin his career. His shipmates would find out. He'd end up losing everything—including his life. Visions of Toxic Sugar Plums danced in my head as I plowed in and out. I marveled at the power of my Spooge over his Pussy—the power to condemn him to an ignoble Death. IT WAS INTOXICATING!

I knew how my Cohorts felt as they fucked and poisoned the Turds half-witted enough to trust them, how elated the Dude who POZZED me must have felt as he passed me the Baton. TRIUMPHANT! I felt my nuts tighten with the familiar surge of cum. I knew if I shot in him, it might cost him his life. If I withdrew, he might survive. But it was too late. I could not stop. I quickened my pace and pounded his bloody hole deeper. The orgasm was the most stupendous I'd ever experienced. 'Wow!' I thought. 'No wonder the world is awash in BUG JUICE!'

My spasming Cock shook me to the core as jets of poison erupted up his ass. Then I felt repulsed. I loathed him and shirked away. The sorry little fuck was still tryin' to jack off. I pulled out, got off the bed, and dressed. "What's wrong?" So innocent. "Nothing, Dude. I'm done." He looked a little hurt, but I had bigger fish to fry. He was just a common little slut not worth the fuss. Besides, he'd soon be dead.

It had all been so intense, and my balls ached for more. But the fuckin' slut was dead meat, anyway; and my body needed to recharge. I couldn't get away fast enough. That was my first BUGGING experience, and there were many more to cum. I didn't expect to live more than a few years, so my mission became one of fucking to my heart's content. And I did. I'm sure a lot of bottoms succumbed to my disease, but I survived and thrived undeterred. 'As long as I have an ounce of cum left in me….'

The best BUGGING was before '96, back when HIV was a certain death sentence. Of course the fear and stigma persist today, but nothing like it was in the days before the cocktail—when death was much more in your face. After a while, I got bold enough to tell the bastards that I was POZ and they were going to die. Then, later, I'd jack off at home—at their panic and dismay. My favorites were the married guys and bi's who had so much to lose. How many of their ilk committed suicide rather than confront their female cunts—fuckin' cowards all! And how I loved to describe to them the course of the disease. Too bad I didn't get out to their hospices or funerals much. But time was of the essence, and there were so many more NEG Cunts to POZ. Of course with all the HIV Disclosure Laws, today it's too dangerous to reveal one’s status. So now I'm Grade A, STEALTH POZZER No. 1. The dudes don't need to know until they get tested. I'll grant them that largess. By then, the 'who' behind their demise will be but a faint flicker in a blur of bareback sex.

Anyway, while this year has not been good to me. My T-cells plummeted to below 200, and my VL peaked at one point to over 300,000, but I'm back in the loop. After battling a number of illnesses over the past six months, I have recovered most of my health and vitality and am on the prowl once again—in the back rooms of seedy bars, cruisy parks, and other lewd and lascivious places. I refuse to take meds because I cannot tolerate most of them and am resistant to others. Anyway, I like living on the edge and love it when my viral load is high. It feels so much more lethal, unloading a TOXIC DOSE in some anonymous man cunt. and more virile than ever—due to my lack of meds. So I'm off to the baths. Surely some of you have seen me there. I may have even coupled with a few of you. I've spread my poison there night after night and many afternoons.

Edited April 16, 2013 by Hotload84

[goodboygonebad]

This get me so hot! Thank you I almost came reading it but I'm gonna edge a bit and read it over and over..

It excites me these guys are out there. Fucking a young neg sailor bareback? Who wouldn't want to do that. If he lets a neg top fuck him bareback and cum in him there is still a small risk og HIV if the neg top didn't know - so he didn't give fuck.. he's a pig - I wish I was hanging out and you introduced me as your friend - I would have assured him you were neg and that we just got tested last week.. I would have loved to see the dark HIV force take you over and I would have loved to see his innocence being selfishly taken by you from his shit hole. - What a fucking pig letting a guy blow a load in his shitter. He deserved it .. I hope that the poz top keeps stealthing the boys that are still afraid to confront their destiny and still are bbing ...

[evilqueerpig]

Any guy who gets fucked bareback is 100% aware of the risks he's taking, and when I'm the one knocking them up, it just adds a twisted sense of perverse pleasure to the act. While there are times when I'm completely honest about my status, in anonymous situations, it's so easy for me to lie and stealth, as I feel nothing but contempt for my victims.

[bobbie]

Why "contempt"?

[evilqueerpig]

Contempt because they're either in denial or lying to themselves about the risks of barebacking. When HIV/AIDS first made news, I chose to continue barebacking, as I'd been practicing ever since my first time with a man, risks and consequences be damned, I've always been honest with myself and can't stand those who aren't.

[Hotload84]

Hmmm. I wouldn't have thought to use the word contempt, Evilqueerpig, but certainly your comment "...they're in denial or lying to themselves about the risks of barebacking" has a visceral appeal. Would you acknowledge a carve-out for bareback bottoms who have diminished capacity to make informed decisions? I would be reluctant to apply your appraisal where the bottom is high, drunk, emotionally distraught, or literally has markedly reduced intelligence. In my mind such an individual cannot make a coherent decision as to whether or not he should get barebacked. What do you think?

[evilqueerpig]

If a bottom willingly gets to drunk or high to make informed decisions, I can't consider that diminished capacity, given the plethora of information that's readily available. Those of diminished mental/intellectual capacity certainly aren't capable of making coherent decisions and while I would choose to stay away from them, others might breed them just because they're easy prey. Whether or not people agree with me, I'll always stand by my opinions, and if it sparks debate, so much the better. Your feedback is valued and it's obvious that you take your position as Super Moderator quite seriously.

[Hotload84]

If a bottom willingly gets to drunk or high to make informed decisions, I can't consider that diminished capacity, given the plethora of information that's readily available....

I can understand your position, Evilqueerpig. Perhaps I can take the more conservative position because I tend to be disinterested in fucking around with guys who are drunk or high. Of course if I don't realize the guy's condition, I suppose I might well unwittingly cross my own bright line. This is certainly an interesting line of thought, and one I've considered many times over the years.

[evilqueerpig]

As a rabid "leftie", I detest the term conservative, but I do agree with your stance. If a guy is too fucked up to enjoy the scene, I'll look elsewhere, it's no fun fucking someone whose head is not in the right space. Been known to "indulge" myself, but never do more than I can handle.

[Hotload84]

As a rabid "leftie", I detest the term conservative, but I do agree with your stance.

Nice distinction. Reminds me of a friend who refused to use the words "turn right" in dispensing directions. Rather he says "make a non-left"!

I'm somewhat simple-minded as to chemical enhancement, in particular, and alcohol (to excess). As I've never indulged in the former (not even weed), and seldom in the latter, I tend to be genuinely disinterested in fucking around with those under the influence. For example, a really hot guy who lives close to Philadelphia contacted me and wanted to fuck around. He was willing to even meet at the local bath house - hurrah! But then he brought up his desire to 'indulge', to use your language, and my willy went back to sleep mode, so we've never hooked-up. Oh well. One less thing to worry about.

[evilqueerpig]

Rather than say go straight when giving directions, I substitute the term "gayly forward". My philosophy is..."there are NO straight men...just men who haven't had sex with me!"

We all make our own choices about enhancements, and I respect your decision not to indulge. As said in a previous post, I know my limits with chems and even the HOTTEST men lose their heat when chems control them, instead of the other way around. I'm enough of a PIG/SLUT that I don't have to get high to fuck.

[mtncumboy]

This story gives great insight to a neg bottom. the difference with me is i want to look you in the face and have you ask me if i want your poz cum. Im not sure what i will do with it once Im pregnant, but I know I will not take meds for my first year. To look at HIV in a broader sense, we all die, so will it matter how in the end? Hell i could find out i have it tomorrow and then walk out of the doctors office and get hit by a car, so time is of little importance.

[WanderingStar]

If this wasn't a 'story' I'd say the guy needs serious medical help and locking away from society in general. Plays to the 'get what you deserve' clan.

[Pigforpoz]

rawtop,

I enjoyed your story! I think of all the things ive learned in life, and im 51, this was the biggest eye opener for me. But i believe i always knew some guys lie or dont disclose

their hiv status. I was bareback fucked in september 2012 by a guy who said on his manhunt profile he was poz friendly! he assured me he was neg, but after he fucked me bareback

and shot a good load into me, he confided he had sex with poz guys, but said he was neg because he had safe sex with them. He also said getting fucked by a poz guy was not a sure thing

to getting pozzed because if the poz guy is on meds, the conversion may not be successful. Which is why if a neg guy wants to be converted its best to find a poz guy who stopped taking

his meds and has a high or somewhat high viral load. I remember he wanted me to douch before sex which i did, that made my ass sore. I found out later that douching can irritate your ass

and possibly make it bleed?????....which will make you more able to be converted. I shit out his cum afterwards while at his house which is one way to prevent the conversion, as ive learned,

its best to leave the cum inside you if you want to be pozzed! Using a brush on your ass before being fucked will allow the poz cum to enter one's bloodstream.

Anyway, I enjoyed the fucking very much even though i didnt get off myself. It would have been cool if he sucked on my cock and swallowed my load of cum. I had the flu shot around the same

time which made me sick for about 6 weeks. So, i really dont know if the guy pozzed me or I had a reaction to the flu shot. At any rate I dont care, and agree with other gay guys who get

pozzed and afterwards can totally enjoy gay sex because they are already hiv pozitive. I mean, like, if you have bareback sex and your already poz, do you run to the doctor for another hiv test

and say, 'Doc, I know I'm poz, but I just had sex and I think I just got pozzed again!'

I'm ready to be pozzed too! I realize its a disease, but i find it makes me hot and gets my cock hard, especially when i read stories like yours. I have always been gay; never had straight sex, and enjoy man to man sex very much! My chances of testing poz go up every time i get bareback fucked. So, better to get pozzed and get it out of the way and move on!

Back in 2000 I went to Dallas Texas, a town I love very much! There's a big gay community down there! I felt right at home! The largest gay church is there as well as another church

probably episcopal???...not sure, where everyone in church is gay. That was quite an experience. I spent most my time checking out the hot guys! I didn't really care about the service,

only in hooking up with someone and maybe falling in love with another gay guy! And I wonder too about manhunt and raw top's breeding zone and other gay sites, I mean, are we all just

horny, or deep down, do all us gay men hope one day to find that one special guy and fall in love??...after all we do have gay marriage now! I had a crush on a gay guy in Dallas when I was there,

didnt realize it until the next day after we fucked! He had a boyfriend, and i was just a fuckbuddy! I cried on the flight back to Boston! I really had a crush on him. The guy who I stayed with

in Dallas introduced him to me, who himself was poz! This gay guy I stayed with in Dallas didnt tell me he was poz until the next morning, which explained why we didnt go all the way. You see

I got in the shower with him and french kissed him, he was a good kisser, and worked my way down his chest to his cock, licking his body the whole time, and started sucking on his good sized

cock. He must have been close to cumming because he pushed me away from his cock! I know I swallowed his precum, but I never got pozzed! He had a great body, but he was bossy and when it

came time for sex he was a pussy! Anyway, I think i miss the poz guy, but my life is in new england, although I liked Dallas and the gay scene very much!

And, no, I never got pozzed from that encounter! When I see shows on logo about gay life in dallas, i'm tempted to move and be immersed in gay life......kinda like living in Provincetown in Mass.

Also, I dont feel sorry for the neg guys who get pozzed! They know the risks! And yes some poz guys lie! So, if you dont want to get pozzed, have safe sex or no sex, or just jerk off!

I see your profile dont say poz, so, 'buyer beware', or 'barebacker beware'. I didnt know you owned this site. I was wondering why there is no charge to use this site. everyone else charges.

Id pay to use this site, I enjoy it very much! Everyone on here is very honest and open, not like on manhunt!

If I want to get pozzed, most of the gay guys on here are honest about their desire to poz neg guys, like me, who want to be pozzed! They dont play games about their status here and if you want poz

this is a good site to hook up and get pozzed!

[glen]

I just recently turned poz and I did my first gift giving and …I just pozzed a dude today, I met him on line…he just wanted to try sex with a poz guy bb and be converted…I invited him over about noon ….I got him to PNP a little with some white….started to play with his ass…used a vibrating dildo…he got turned on …I gave him some more white and I used a tooth brush on his ass....told him I was cleaning his virgin ass…..when I saw blood I started to fuck him …I fucked him for at least 20 minutes slow and hard and then I started to go faster and I groaned you are going to get my toxic seed dude…you are going to be pozzed good. I shot a huge load in him…he felt the cum and then realized I had shot my load in him……He liked the feeling and I told him after the second time I fucked him that I was highly toxic probably 800,000 or higher Viral load as I am not on meds yet and the dude that pozzed me was 800.000 +…I then told him I would suck him off and swallow his last load of neg cum…I told him that he was probably converted and he could begin enjoy sex now with other poz guys uninhibited…. He said he is coming back to swap loads with me …I said sure….It felt good to pass on the gift …I liked the feeling of converting a neg guy…I liked pozzing him….it turned me on…