Is it wrong for a bottom to use his top's dick for their own pleasure?

[backdoorjimmy]

22 hours ago, ErosWired said:

I was trained to find my fulfillment in sex through the satisfaction of the Top.

That's how it was for me when I first started having sex. I just thought I was supposed to get the top off and then it was over. 

 

22 hours ago, ErosWired said:

To use a Top’s cock to achieve a personal orgasm would be misdirected for me, if I could even cum from it at all.

Well I don't cum with my dick, but I still have an orgasm. It's hard to explain but I know for sure when it happens. 

[tallslenderguy]

1 hour ago, find91 said:

As long as both parties are in agreement who am I to judge. Personal I can't be a service top I find it too degrading and I hate bossy bottoms but that is just me. I have met and chatted with service top, they can be very cool people very orientedvin giving the bottom pleasure.

Ditto on the other side. i feel wrong straddling and riding a Top, it feels like to much control to me and violates something in me personally.  But i understand that appeals to some, and some want that. For me it feels like to much control. Hell, i have a hard time putting a dildo in my own pussy, it feels like i am trying to top myself and it feels really fake (rolls eyes at self)

[backdoorjimmy]

22 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

But it's not cookie cutter, i'm an individual.  i questioned for awhile just how sub i am, because i didn't fit other's ideas of "sub."  Then i started meeting Dom guys who were an awesome fit, the Yang to my yin and i realized that variety is an awesome thing.  

Not all bottoms are "sub," not all Tops "Dom."  And there's probably an infinite number of variations and combinations of those.

I agree. I don't know how much of a sub I am or if I'm more of a fem. I don't act girly but I like to be controlled and to have my man do things for me like open doors and drive. When I say I'm a 100% bottom, I mean it. I don't like my dick to be touched at all and lately I've been avoiding touching it even when I have to pee by sitting down instead of standing. 

[backdoorjimmy]

22 hours ago, HardOneLA said:

It never starts off about "me" as the bottom; it's always about finding a cock to service, pleasure and please.   But once I've been mounted everything inside me changes and I feel so fulfilled, so satiated, and so realizing my purpose.  As I have those feelings it empowers the top to fuck harder, better, and stronger knowing we're both on the same track to breeding.

Do you orgasm when you have sex? Or does it matter to you if you orgasm at all? I don't cum with my dick but I have really strong orgasms when my bf hits my spot just right. I feel like I should be satisfied even if I don't have a climax. 

[backdoorjimmy]

21 hours ago, Ozpig said:

My tops' cocks is always for my pleasure just as my holes are there for his

 

I like that  

[backdoorjimmy]

17 hours ago, NLbear said:

You're not selfish.

Thanks 😊

 

Quote

Every gay guy has needs be it top, bottom or vers. Tops can use my hole for their pleasure, I use their cock for mine. And it's great when those two needs come together in the same session 😉 

Do you have orgasms when you have sex with your tops? Just wondering because when I first started having sex I never climaxed, then I had my first anal orgasm and started wanting it every time. I didn't always have one until I starting dating my current bf and now I have them pretty regularly. I just feel a little selfish about it because I was always taught that the bottom is supposed to make sure his man gets off and not the other way around. 

 

 

[backdoorjimmy]

9 hours ago, rawsatyr said:

When I top a dude I prefer to see his face, a fiendish smirk and a raging lollipop hard-on dripping precum from his dimpled piss-slit in anticipation of being bred!!!! One who carries himself like a dude, who talks like a dude and who smirks as he says: "Gotta run! But Thanks for nutting in my ass, bro!" 

 

Thanks for the great reply. Not to single out just one part of your post, but I have to ask if it would turn you off if someone wasn't hard when you were fucking them. I haven't had a hardon in a long time. When I get horny I feel it in my ass and no where else. I've never jacked off before. I don't act girly but I feel feminine a lot of the time. 

Would that be a boner killer for you? 

[backdoorjimmy]

8 hours ago, PissPigBrooklyn said:

What else would he use it for?  The idea that a bottom is divorced from any kind of pleasure is archaic, a bit homophobic and unfair to both the bottom and top. It may work in a master/slave relationship but even there the "slave" should be deriving pleasure from the way he is being used.

That's how I feel too, but until I read your reply I didn't know how to say it. Thanks for responding with this.  

Quote

My hole gets a lot of pleasure when a top's raw dick enters it and pounds it. When we work it together it is better for each of us. A top has an ego too that needs satisfying and often that involves knowing that he is pleasuring his bottom. To consider one"s self just a hole that is there as a receptacle for the top may be fine in some instances but it may actually be in other cases cheating the top for the bottom's psychological pleasure which he gets by withholding his responses.

How do you know when you're satisfied? I know a lot of guys who jack off when they're getting laid but I don't like to touch my dick at all. Do you cum from your dick and balls? Do you have anal orgasms? Just wondering because a lot of vers guys but I don't have any friends who are exclusive bottoms like me and sometimes I feel like no one else gets me. 

 

 

[backdoorjimmy]

24 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

Ditto on the other side. i feel wrong straddling and riding a Top, it feels like to much control to me and violates something in me personally.  But i understand that appeals to some, and some want that. For me it feels like to much control. Hell, i have a hard time putting a dildo in my own pussy, it feels like i am trying to top myself and it feels really fake (rolls eyes at self)

How do you know when you're satisfied? Does it happen when your top cums or is it something else? 

[ErosWired]

 

9 hours ago, rawsatyr said:

  I myself as a 'reformed, serial monogamist top' have taken the pledge to take all raw cock with the conviction and relish of a dark angel. No pulling out, no loads refused, no regrets and no shame! In some ways I feel like it's penance for having been a 'putz', compensation for having been a judgmental cunt,

I’m fairly sure it wasn’t your intention, but in developing your argument in high praise of power bottoms, you managed to squeeze in a dis on most guys who aren’t good-looking, athletic, and totally vers ‘Players’, including the “simple-minded” dedicated Tops and us submissive total bottoms who “lacked an exciting personality”.

 I’m glad you’ve found your niche. But the world of Men is much bigger and more complex than you seem to appreciate, and there are plenty of us who thrive in the encounters and relationships we find with the people on whom you’ve chosen to turn your back, for reasons I don’t expect you to understand.

 I usually enjoy your posts, but that one... not so much.

[tallslenderguy]

4 minutes ago, backdoorjimmy said:

How do you know when you're satisfied? Does it happen when your top cums or is it something else? 

absolutely... i gain my satisfaction from my Tops... it's like His orgasm transfers from Him to me. 

[Guest hodannyboi]

Asking if one is a selfish bottom, is such a selfish bottom thing to do.  😂

[find91]

2 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

Ditto on the other side. i feel wrong straddling and riding a Top, it feels like to much control to me and violates something in me personally.  But i understand that appeals to some, and some want that. For me it feels like to much control. Hell, i have a hard time putting a dildo in my own pussy, it feels like i am trying to top myself and it feels really fake (rolls eyes at self)

I think most people automatically link sub/Dom with bottom and Top. In most cases they go together. Bottoms being sub and Tops being Dom, but like anything we humans it get complicated fast. Their are Dominant Bottoms and passive tops. If your sub by nature it will natural feel odd trying to direct and control your partner. So I don't see it as a question of wrong or right but more of a compatibility issue. Like tallslenderguy said forcing someone out of their natyral inclination will make them feel uncomfortable. So trying to use a Top's dick for your own pleasure, pretty much like a dildo with a life support unit may work with a few tops but will most likely piss off most tops because most tops view themselves as Dominant.

Furthermore, Top guys who are dominant don't like feeling used. We view it ad disrespectful. In contrast to a sub bottom or cumdump that thrives on that feeling being used, or service and worked over.

[NLbear]

5 hours ago, backdoorjimmy said:

Do you have orgasms when you have sex with your tops? Just wondering because when I first started having sex I never climaxed, then I had my first anal orgasm and started wanting it every time. I didn't always have one until I starting dating my current bf and now I have them pretty regularly. I just feel a little selfish about it because I was always taught that the bottom is supposed to make sure his man gets off and not the other way around. 

 

 

Yes I do. Not always but my regulars want to see me orgasm. It shows them they can get me off with their dick. There is nothing selfish about it. Sex is a two-way street for me. I do understand there are bottoms who don't care if they cum or not as long as they can make the top cum or see that as their only role, and I appreciate that,  but I am not one of those.

[NLbear]

4 hours ago, find91 said:

I think most people automatically link sub/Dom with bottom and Top. In most cases they go together. Bottoms being sub and Tops being Dom, but like anything we humans it get complicated fast. Their are Dominant Bottoms and passive tops. If your sub by nature it will natural feel odd trying to direct and control your partner. So I don't see it as a question of wrong or right but more of a compatibility issue. Like tallslenderguy said forcing someone out of their natyral inclination will make them feel uncomfortable. So trying to use a Top's dick for your own pleasure, pretty much like a dildo with a life support unit may work with a few tops but will most likely piss off most tops because most tops view themselves as Dominant.

Furthermore, Top guys who are dominant don't like feeling used. We view it ad disrespectful. In contrast to a sub bottom or cumdump that thrives on that feeling being used, or service and worked over.

I am a bottom but I am not a sub. I am not submissive in real life and I am not in the bedroom. The Dutch are known for being direct and speak their mind. There is a reason we are called blunt by other nations. That doesn't mean I take control. I am happy to let the top take control. But I will let him (or them) know loud and clear if he does something I don't like. And vice versa so does the top.