CAN MEN LOOK AT YOU AND KNOW YOU ARE GAY FAG? OR ITS NOT SO OBVIOUS?

[NYBBGUY58]

A certain amount is in the eye of the beholder, as they say, but generally I think of myself as a completely identifiable gay man. I never troubled myself trying to pass, because I knew it wouldn't be convincing for one thing. Nothing is more obvious (or pathetic) than a guy trying to hide his non-masculine mannerisms; it sticks out a mile and not in a good way. I simply refused to hide, even when it was less than comfortable. My attitude was, "Well fuck that shit. You don't like me, guess what - it's a big world, you're free to go elsewhere and talk to other people. What I do is NOT. ABOUT. YOU." Of course, many couldn't deal with that, whatever I did was an affront to them, a provocation.  They might have had an easier time if I'd gone all the way with it, meaning dressed especially femme, though even there I was/am "mainstream with that little twist" (bright colors, cowboy boots, etc. with business/business casual wear). With the guys I had sex with it could be painful. They loved fucking me, but didn't want to be seen with me in public. Sucks. More than one told me in no uncertain terms that I should butch it up, and that would be the death-knell for anything else ever happening between us. Sigh.

I say:  LET YOUR FLAG FLY, WHOEVER YOU ARE, HOWEVER YOU FIND IT COMFORTABLE TO BE. Let's create a world where all of us can be genuine and comfortable with that. And if anyone isn't comfortable - inevitable, I know - just you do you and let others do themselves. Okay?

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." - Henry David Thoreau

[Guest]

On 12/25/2021 at 1:47 AM, Cockdumb&Cute said:

They know....no doubt.. 

Of course they know. I was walking down the street one night and a car pulled up. The guy opened the window and boldly asked if I would like to suck his cock. I look pretty straight when I'm walking - nothing effeminate about me - but this guy, handsome, physically-fit, and black, sensed that I would be willing to suck his cock. I smiled at him, and he told me to get in. I didn't hesitate. The next several hours are a blur to me. I either had his cock in my mouth or deep inside my pussy. He had an enormous cock. He kept saying to me: "you know how to handle cock...you do a great job...you know I'm going to fuck you...ah...ah." So, yeah, they know. Why would I resist dropping my shorts when the opportunity surfaces. 

I'd love to hear from you.....cheers.

Jamie

[theplayerking]

While not stereotypically effeminate, I definitely come across as metrosexual (e.g., like Will from Will & Grace) and most people outside of a major city would probably assume I’m gay. 

[jeff238]

Nope. Most of the time they don't even believe me when I tell them. I like the baths because of that. No one cares.

[downtownswallow]

Not obvious at all.  My sexuality is simply part of me.  I share my attraction to men with those I trust.  I have a circle of friends with whom I share various interests and strive to be a good human. 

Edited April 17, 2023 by downtownswallow

[Guest]

I am not effeminate. I am not in the. When I speak to co-workers about my personal life I say, “my boyfriend and I”. I talk to people similarly like they were talking about their opposite sex partners.

Most people tell me they didn’t know I was gay when they first met me and the revelation was a surprise. 

When I was a teen I only came out to two friends but when I officially came out at 18 many of my friends were surprised as they never knew however a few told me when they sat to think about it, it made sense because I never once talked about girls or dating. I had a boyfriend throughout high school they just didn’t know it was a man. 

[wbekk85]

I don't fit the stereotype. People usually think I'm redneck trash at first glance. They don't find out otherwise until I tell them I'm gay.

[topblkmale]

I keep myself (personal hygiene), clothing and my belongings (home, car, clothing) clean and neat. Women often comment on how neat and clean cut I am while slightly inferring that I might be gay.

[Ilovetoswallowcum]

I have the opposite problem,  I want men to know I'm a bottom.  Thinking of getting a leather cuff for my right wrist to wear in public, to see if I can attracted some attention. 

[marriedsub]

I wish! Wouldn't that be great? Just a glance and they would know instantly that I'm available to take their cocks and seed...

Unfortunately, I don't it's obvious at all... I'm a married, straight-acting average-looking man... Anyone know of a discreet signal, bracelet, etc. that only gay men would pick up on?

[PigBoyDallas]

I like to think I look and sound pretty masculine but guys have clocked me saying I have a certain twinkle in my eyes and a smirk that's a giveaway. But guys also know that Latino guys are kind of slutty and swing both ways, which is cool and not necessarily wrong. I guess I'm also approachable and I often get guys chatting me up when I'm out in public. I guess I'm friendly and non-threatening.

[ErosWired]

On 6/18/2023 at 5:37 PM, PigBoyDallas said:

But guys also know that Latino guys are kind of slutty and swing both ways,

They know that? My impression was that a (alternative) common stereotype of Latino men is that they are macho and correspondingly homophobic, largely as a result of the dominant influence of Catholicism. This is, of course, just as inapplicable as a generalization as the one you report.

[ErosWired]

On 4/19/2023 at 2:22 PM, Ilovetoswallowcum said:

Thinking of getting a leather cuff for my right wrist to wear in public, to see if I can attracted some attention. 

In the genderfluid, alternative-lifestyle-contorted, influencer-warped-beyond-all-recognition culture we’re living in, do you imagine that such a thing would actually be considered to signal something? There are celebrity men wearing dresses, and we can’t tell what they mean by it.

Personally, I think it would be cool to have accessories embedded with little readable info chips, kind of like the things that get implanted into pets, but in this case such that you could take it on or off, and someone with a reader could tell what you’re trying to broadcast.

[PaganzofLA]

My two ⍧ they know if I want them to know. Spend wisely.  

[Jude]

Probably not, but I do tend to focus on a guys crotch area when any are nearby, so maybe I give myself away....