Your "Red Flags"

[WhOregon]

Anyone from Breeding Zone 

Lazy Bottom only guys

Eternal text threads going nowhere 

Guys who seem more interested in drugs than sex

Guys who are more interested in getting pics than talking about sex

One text per day to make a plan

 

 

 

 

 

[JacksonSpade]

Hey there, Salem Oregon here!

[ellentonboy]

On 4/12/2022 at 8:39 PM, ejaculaTe said:

"Can you bring some other tops with you?" 

"Sure, there's a regional Tops convention going on in town right now. There should be 4 or 5 guys wanting to nail an ass after all of these damn meetings."

----

Guys who ask you to "bring other tops" seem to think there's 6 or 7 tops sitting in a lounge somewhere, waiting for an urgent plea from a bottom in need, as if they're fighter pilots ready to scramble at a moment's notice. I always avoided guys who made that request.

Personally when someone says "bring other tops" I initially cringe but what comes to mind is:

A.  They aren't satisfied with one and are afraid the first invited might not meet their "expectations".

B.  They have no concern for the feelings of the initial top they invited and consider him a link to other tops.

C.  They tell a top they are on their way after having spent the past 16 hours at a bathhouse but they can find time in their busy schedule of bottoming to swing by and collect another load.

D.  Most awful situation.  Having a bottom friend overstay his welcome because he wanted to see which top was going to show up.  The guy was incredible gratuitous not knowing I was going to have a friend at my place and really put a 100 percent effort into his topping efforts.  My bottom friend was on stomach, on his cell phone, texting other guys while getting fucked and had no concern for the feelings of the individual who was doing a fantastic job of tagging him.

I agree 100 percent with the poster above.  I never ask someone to bring an additional person with them, for fear I might offend them, as if they are not good enough.  Now I know in my profile I do say "one - on -one", "three-ways" or "group" is all an option.  I put it out there.  The most successful situations where someone bought an extra guy was when THEY suggested it, or asked if they could bring another guy along.  I know I would be offended if a top said "can you make sure there is an extra bottom or two at your place" as if I wasn't going to be good enough to fulfill his expectations.

I just wish some guys would think before they open their mouths.

[PozDom]

It’s all the empty profiles on sites like Bbrt or NKP where everything is listed as “ask me”. I get some people want privacy but that’s just taking it to an extreme and it’s very not horny if I have to ask someone for basic details.

[BannedWord]

3 hours ago, toxicseeker said:

It’s all the empty profiles on sites like Bbrt or NKP where everything is listed as “ask me”. I get some people want privacy but that’s just taking it to an extreme and it’s very not horny if I have to ask someone for basic details.

That's just lazy. You're making someone else do all the effort of finding out the information you didn't want to post (not "you" personally, but the "Mr. Ask Me" profile). Does the answer change situationally that one day it's a sissy-botton femboi and the next it's a sadistic Dom top? If I need to play 20 questions to learn basic info (and these same guys give one word answers, which loses my interest quickly), I'm not playing because they won't make an effort.

I imagine that fucking one of these dudes is like humping a wet noodle.

[bluedragon]

Not exactly red flags, because if I'm attracted I'll still probably fuck you anyway, but from this vers top guy's perspective here are some tips to suck less in bed:

 

1. Don't start begging me for my load only 2 minutes after I put my dick in you. OK bottoms, I know some of you have a huge fixation on semen, but one thing that is guaranteed to make me not come is if I start feeling real pressure to come now. In fact, it can take me quite a bit of time to come, and sometimes it only happens after I've had one or two other guys. Yes, I know that might be disappointing to some who want a load from every guy they fuck, but try and look on the good side. I enjoy the fuck whether we both come or not. I'd rather have five or six guys and come at the end than two guys and come in both of them.

Never thought I would do this before I started fucking BB but I've even faked it with a few guys just to shut them up.

2. Don't just lie there. OK, a lot of guys have hangups about male-male intimacy, but if you come into my home, take off all your clothes, get on all fours and wait for me to put my bare dick inside you, we're already pretty intimate. Kissing helps set the mood, no harm in a bit of foreplay, and when you're getting fucked, being a little bit responsive and letting me know how good it feels makes me a better top. Reaching behind you to pull me deeper into you is very nice. This does not mean 'top from the bottom' which can easily also become annoying. Good bottoming is a skill just like topping is.

3. Most importantly, don't confuse sexual position with a personality trait. Topping and bottoming are both different ways of having sex with men, and believe it or not, one isn't more gay than another or less macho than the other.
'Fun' story, I put together a three at one time between one guy who was a regular fuckbuddy and another guy I had just met. The regular fuckbuddy had to leave halfway through because he got so upset at seeing me get fucked by the third. Turns out I had only ever topped him and he had built up this fantasy in his head of the strict top who never got fucked and couldn't deal with this not being reality. Please use logic here and don't allow your brain to become fixated on very rigid received ideas.
If you absolutely want to do only topping or only bottoming yourself, fine, I lean more to the top side myself, but at least allow yourself to consider the fact that sometimes the best sessions involve a lot of flipping and two guys exploring each other in lots of different ways.

But yeah, if you are hot enough, you can do all of these things and I'll still fuck you, but you are definitely not making it onto the list of my most memorable meets.

[BergenGuy]

12 hours ago, toxicseeker said:

It’s all the empty profiles on sites like Bbrt or NKP where everything is listed as “ask me”. I get some people want privacy but that’s just taking it to an extreme and it’s very not horny if I have to ask someone for basic details.

I found that empty profiles are very common on Grindr.  Nothing in their profiles .. not even age or distance.  But, their first message is "do you want to hookup"?

[NWUSHorny]

23 hours ago, bluedragon said:

If you absolutely want to do only topping or only bottoming yourself, fine, I lean more to the top side myself, but at least allow yourself to consider the fact that sometimes the best sessions involve a lot of flipping and two guys exploring each other in lots of different ways.

I love to flip fuck, and have absolutely no problem if someone comes up behind me and slips me a dick while I am fucking a guy, but I have been with a lot of bottoms that get pissed off when they find out you are not a total top. Total bottoms don't seem to have any concept of how rare total tops are, or how much easier it is to get fucked in a group that is primarily made up of versatile guys. I know there are a lot of bottoms that claim they have never even tried topping, I'm not sure I know any highly active tops that could or would make that same claim about bottoming.

[Guest]

19 hours ago, BergenGuy said:

I found that empty profiles are very common on Grindr.  Nothing in their profiles .. not even age or distance.  But, their first message is "do you want to hookup"?

i find the blank profiles are the sluts i'm looking for usually, lol. they sneak up with the familair emojis 

[PozDom]

22 hours ago, BergenGuy said:

I found that empty profiles are very common on Grindr.  Nothing in their profiles .. not even age or distance.  But, their first message is "do you want to hookup"?

The worst ones are those who ask for picture but don’t have any themselves.

[BergenGuy]

16 hours ago, toxicseeker said:

The worst ones are those who ask for picture but don’t have any themselves.

Of course, their explanation is almost always that they have to be "discreet."  

[gwmxyz]

I don't mind people with no pics themselves.  But the ones who ask "More pics?"

Nothing says "timewaster" like "more pics".

[LetsPOZBreed]

On 4/15/2022 at 1:55 PM, ellentonboy said:

B.  They have no concern for the feelings of the initial top they invited and consider him a link to other tops.

This one SO, SO much!  Personally, I think it's a lack of respect for the guy you've invited over (or agreed to meet).  Effectively, this is a bottom "hedging his bets" in case the initial guy is not up to his expectations.  

On 4/15/2022 at 9:48 PM, bluedragon said:

1. Don't start begging me for my load only 2 minutes after I put my dick in you.

This one too.  Reminds me of a time I got fucked (REALLY good) by this guy at one of the London saunas.  He did breed me...about 30 min later...and we sat together afterwards to catch our breath.  Told me that he liked that my reactions to him fucking me was just to let my moans just go with it.  Said that when bottoms beg him to cum that it's actually a put-off.  I get not every top is going to be like this, but I've actually gotten to the point of telling potential tops that I message that I'm not interested in begging for your cum unless and until YOU say it's okay to do so.  

In a way, I think both of these comments go hand-in-hand.  As a bottom, my job is to respect and appreciate the guy that is fucking me.  I'm not interested in his cum or his mates....I'm interested in HIM and the way he fucks me.  Anything in excess of that is a bonus, but not something I'm going to be asking (or begging) for.

[PozDom]

8 hours ago, BergenGuy said:

Of course, their explanation is almost always that they have to be "discreet."  

Which doesn’t really hold much ground now considering most messaging platforms and apps support delete-on-read messages. I usually just block them after a few messages if it’s going nowhere and I still haven’t seen at least one picture of them.

[justsexnowatl]

On 4/16/2022 at 4:46 PM, NYCdumbSLUT said:

i find the blank profiles are the sluts i'm looking for usually, lol. they sneak up with the familair emojis 

I'm kinda the same now.  Didn't used to like those total "ask me" profiles, but I realized it's more like DON'T ASK ME - anon, no questions asked is what they really mean.  It's like turning the corner in a bathhouse and bumping into someone hot - no questions asked and you're in their room playing - no idea if they're top/bttm/raw/status/high - you just found each other hot and see what happens - LOVE THAT.  And I also find some of those total "ask me" guys are pretty much into EVERYTHING.  They leave it open so they can be into whatever YOU'RE into 🙂