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I think I’m over this site.


wood

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I’m going to preface this in that I don’t intend to delete and disappear, but I am fairly sick of much of the content. 
____________________________________
 

Bare sex between men has now become mainstream with the advent of PrEP and Tasp, which I find awesome. We can finally  just have the sex we want too, without care. 

Right now we finally have the opportunity to have the hedonistic sex of the 1970’s again and it’s glorious. 

I dated my first BF in the early 2000’s who was undetectable and it was scary as hell then. Now it’s normal, which is amazing. 
 

however it’s seems now that many people on this site post flagrantly fake or false things about what they are talking about. I have talked to moderators before about this with their agreement.  The amount of lies and fakery to what people post has become absurd. I’d really like this site to be a community of likeminded people who are no judgmental, and just share in likeminded ideas, instead it seems like if you aren’t chasing a rattle snake while injecting T, and getting fucked by a guy with a 10 million VL it’s not enough. 
 

RAwtop created a great space. I just wonder what that space has become. 

im not against bugchasing (not my thing) or any kind of free speech, but I haven’t seen a “positive” (not like that) movement in this community in years. I also have to applaud rawtop in his efforts in this past year to rein in certain topics. 
 

The anonymity of this site makes it very easy for some to live out fantasies and that’s okay. Hell. If people knew what my life was actually like vs my posts they would bust all the nuts. However, that’s also my point.  There is a lack of sanity here that’s more than concerning. 
 

People actually come here for advice and information and if the first response they see as a vulnerable person is “yeah take all the loads and get the gift and share it” I think we are doing it wrong. 
 

if this community wants to descend into the equivalent of “smoke yourself to death” hey, cool it’s a free country. I just won’t be around for it. Wanna talk about hot anon sex all over the place? Fuck yes. 
 

 My personal stories which I have never shared here are in the top 5% of all I have read on here. I don’t talk about them because as someone involved in public health I don’t find it appropriate, but if you google rawrods I’ve played with a few. 
 

In closing, I don’t know what the future is for this site. After being around this community for almost 10 years; it now seems really lost. We have new guys with zero clue, older meth addicts telling everyone to get charged and others maybe getting off on it? Anyway I’m done and I wish everyone on here the best. 

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I agree with some of your points but I also realize that there is no limit to what the human mind can dream up and put into words.  Many, Many, post on this site and other sites are just pure fiction.  The same goes for movies, tv shows etc. I just read most of the posts for entertain purposes only.

There are some very good threads and great post and information posted by a few of the regular poster's along with some sound advice.    

I too do not under stand why someone would want to be given a life changing Virus to join "the brother good" sadly, I have had way too many friends join the " six foot under ground club".  Meds are much better now and life expectancy is greatly extended but getting  here has been a long and very sad road for me and many others.  Prep has allowed many to enjoy the "good old days" before HIV came along and I hope will allow this for the remaining future.  

So .... Get on Prep protect yourself and romanticize and fantasize about any thing you can dream about and enjoy the ride.

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The one thing that turns me off about this site is that the stories are all from a bottom's point of view.  I've always liked porn stories better than porn videos.  I get off on stories from tops.  Stories from bottoms are so common that they have become boring.  That is why I don't come here too often, and when I do, it's usually to see if something in my town is going on (San Jose CA).  I feel your pain.

 

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@wood, I am sorry to see you go.

I agree that there is a lot of fantasy and exaggeration on this site, but as someone who volunteers in public health (in a longstanding and serious capacity, to the point that people on the calls I attend are surprised that my day job has nothing to do with medical research or with community advocacy), I can't think of a better place to discuss topics like HIV and STI prevention. Here, people are not afraid to talk about the edgy sex that is actually happening, or that they wish were happening.

I believe that most human beings succeed in balancing fantasy with reality. If people have a place where they can talk about bugchasing, heavy drug use, etc., then perhaps they have less need to go all the way in their real lives. (Or maybe I'm completely wrong, and the content incites them to take more health risks.)

As for the site itself, it seems to me to be organized well enough that people who are not interested in a particular practice or fantasy can steer clear and read about other topics.

I don't mean to question your conclusion, but to share a different perspective. I hope you will find other communities, whether online or in-person, that work better for you!

Edited by fskn
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I agree with most of what you are saying. I posted a couple of topics recently where some of the responses turned towards bug chasing, which was certainly not my intention. I want no part in encouraging that kind of behavior or even fantasy. 

I'm sure I would be even more uncomfortable if I read the Backroom forums. I was never a chaser, and am not not  have I ever been a recreational drug user.

Edited by NWUSHorny
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16 hours ago, wood said:

Anyway I’m done and I wish everyone on here the best. 

Awwww .... don't ditch .... stay a while longer and share your thoughts/perceptions as you just have.  One thing I finally figured out how to do, is "unfollow" certain threads that I have no interest in.  That way, I don't even have to see some of the silly business.  There's plenty of great threads/exchanges of ideas on subjects I find interesting and valid.  I well understand how there is a necessity for all areas of interest need to have their space, and the site allows us to "follow" what we find worthwhile, and not what we don't.  Almost every guy has worthwhile input in the threads I follow, and yours - while sad - was definitely worthwhile. 

In any case, best wishes now and in the future.

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I am not going to pick the original poster apart on this subject, but after reading his reasons for leaving I wonder why it took him so long to make this decision.  After all he is a senior member, and clearly states he is employed in public health.  Now the forum name itself, "Breeding Zone" would be an indication as to what the contents were or what interests the participants shared.  So why now?  Why the judgment?  He states he is not into bug chasing, agreed.  He appears to be anti-enhancement, and I understand his feelings on that matter.  But to say that his stories shared are in "the top 5%" of everything posted, how did he come to that conclusion?  I haven't posted anything false that has happened to me.  I have not exaggerated numbers of sex partners or who I have hooked up with.  If anything, I was cautious not to "name names" when it came to porn participants only because they too have a right to privacy.

What really gets me is this "top 5%" business, I mean he says he is in public health, is he now a book or newspaper editor?  Come on, talk about "tooting your own horn".  I wonder what the true reason is that he decided to go?  Anyone feel the same as I do?  I think there is more to this story.

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All the fiction here and the moderation by some tools and holier than thou attitudes turns me off. Scroll through this site and new posts are getting fewer and far between. 
I come here still because it’s one of the only options. Other than that this place is awful how it’s moderated. 

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Everything changes.

We as individuals evolve - when I joined here my outlook was different than it is now. This site is partially responsible for some of those changes, but there are many influences changing us. 

This site has evolved too. People have come and gone. Rules have changed. 

When I joined Bareback was the exception, and PrEP in its infancy. Now it's the norm, and PrEP seems ubiquitous. I think those who enjoyed bareback for the thrill of the risk don't get the same hit and have moved on to things that are found more in The Backroom section. 

And let's not forget the world has changed - it's not the same place as it was before C19. From my own experience locally I'd say that cruising sites and apps are less busy and guys are less inclined to actually meet.  Why? I don't know, but I suspect a lazy wank to some porn is a lot easier than actually going out or hooking up. It's better in cities. 

I accept change is inevitable - we all have some small part in steering it somehow, but none of us can expect to control the direction, except the site owner and its moderators.  I don't like or agree with absolutely everything I read on this site, but so long as I feel welcome, our interests are mostly aligned and I can contribute and learn from being here, then it's all good. 

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11 hours ago, NWUSHorny said:

I posted a couple of topics recently where some of the responses turned towards bug chasing, which was certainly not my intention.

If ANYONE here is bothered by bugchasing, substance use, or other inappropriate replies to their posts OUTSIDE the Backroom, PLEASE do report them! The moderation staff is very limited and it's virtually impossible for us to read everything that gets posted.

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1 hour ago, viking8x6 said:

If ANYONE here is bothered by bugchasing, substance use, or other inappropriate replies to their posts OUTSIDE the Backroom, PLEASE do report them! The moderation staff is very limited and it's virtually impossible for us to read everything that gets posted.

I've done that a couple of times, but only if it was completely over the top.

In the general discussions, I think the moderator do a good job of moving entire threads to the backroom that are about topics that belong there. What bothers me is threads I started that I intended to be about unrestrained promiscuity, where guys jump in with bug chasing content. Despite my discomfort at having them go in that direction, I'm hesitant to report them and stop the discussion.

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I haven't, since I figure I'm only one guy out of thousands, and not really sure where the line falls between "just ignore it" and "report".  Plus, I usually assume the moderators are busy with more important stuff.  

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5 hours ago, ellentonboy said:

I am not going to pick the original poster apart on this subject, but after reading his reasons for leaving I wonder why it took him so long to make this decision.  After all he is a senior member, and clearly states he is employed in public health.  Now the forum name itself, "Breeding Zone" would be an indication as to what the contents were or what interests the participants shared.  So why now?  Why the judgment?  He states he is not into bug chasing, agreed.  He appears to be anti-enhancement, and I understand his feelings on that matter.  But to say that his stories shared are in "the top 5%" of everything posted, how did he come to that conclusion?  I haven't posted anything false that has happened to me.  I have not exaggerated numbers of sex partners or who I have hooked up with.  If anything, I was cautious not to "name names" when it came to porn participants only because they too have a right to privacy.

What really gets me is this "top 5%" business, I mean he says he is in public health, is he now a book or newspaper editor?  Come on, talk about "tooting your own horn".  I wonder what the true reason is that he decided to go?  Anyone feel the same as I do?  I think there is more to this story.

I welcome any comments, you listed your porn experience in your profile, I simply choose not to talk about my sexsploits on here, that’s all. My 5% comment? That’s just my personal judgement based on what I have read and nothing more. 
 

for the rest of the comments, no I’m not leaving and do enjoy parts of this site. But I am taking a step back simply because I’m not seeing where things are going, and the proliferation of absurdly false stories and profiles are just frustrating. 

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55 minutes ago, NWUSHorny said:

What bothers me is threads I started that I intended to be about unrestrained promiscuity, where guys jump in with bug chasing content. Despite my discomfort at having them go in that direction, I'm hesitant to report them and stop the discussion.

Don't be. It's a whole lot easier for us to read and handle one report than to read every single post in the topic just to see if one of them happens to be bugchasing proselytizer crashing the thread.

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17 hours ago, endowed said:

The one thing that turns me off about this site is that the stories are all from a bottom's point of view.  I've always liked porn stories better than porn videos.  I get off on stories from tops.  Stories from bottoms are so common that they have become boring.  That is why I don't come here too often, and when I do, it's usually to see if something in my town is going on (San Jose CA).  I feel your pain.

 

I'd be very interested in hearing more about experiences from the top perspective. That's the kind of mind I'm most interested in peeking into and understanding.

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