Where are all of the tops???

[Close2MyBro]

1 hour ago, NWUSHorny said:

Personally I hate poppers the only thing they ever do for me is give me a headache.

I agree with you 100%. Have only tried them twice, but I've gotten nothing but a bad headache from poppers.

[LetsPOZBreed]

27 minutes ago, BootmanLA said:

So in our own general age cohort, we see an increase in "bottoms" simply as versatile guys give up topping.

I agree with more than just this last sentence, but you're spot on here.  

Personally, my preferences have ebbed and flowed over the years, but I think over time we all settle into our preferred positions after a certain age.  I do get pleasure from topping, but as someone said earlier in the thread, I need an actual connection these days...not really interested in cumdump bottoms who couldn't care less about anything other than my load (not even my cock).  So, anytime another bottom hits me up on the apps - a fact that still occurs with rather alarming regularity - I'll entertain it briefly, but it never fails that they say something that puts me off.

As a vers bottom in my 40's, I know I can't compete with the young twinks; I don't really try to, to be honest.  But I do try and offer potential tops something that they can't find with the plethora of other bottoms out there - the fact that I'm drug-free and won't be high off my tits, the fact that I want to have eye contact throughout the entire session so you can see how much I'm enjoying you, etc. etc.  Doesn't always mean I'll have a great experience with every top that omes over, but I figure I'll put something a little different on the menu for guys to try out.

[Close2MyBro]

I personally blame the lack of tops on the meth problem. Nobody is able to get hard anymore. You see people too young to have erection problems having erection problems. Too many people can't get it up anymore because of meth.

[NWUSHorny]

1 hour ago, Close2MyBro said:

I personally blame the lack of tops on the meth problem. Nobody is able to get hard anymore. You see people too young to have erection problems having erection problems. Too many people can't get it up anymore because of meth.

Drug use may definitely be a factor, although I doubt it is exclusive to meth. It could even explain the difference I saw moving from Denver to Portland 15 years ago. There was definitely drug use in both cities, but it was much more visibly apparent in Portland.

1 hour ago, BootmanLA said:

you're not the 20-something twink that a lot of even versatile guys would jump to fuck because, hey, hot young new meat.

I may be somewhat unusual, in that I have been a stereotypical top since I 1st started having gay sex, but I did not find it easier to find guys willing to top me in my 20 and 30 than I do now in my 50's. I still looked very young well into my late 30's, but was 6'2" 225-230 lbs. but never bigger than a 34" waste, and an almost 8" moderate thick dick, I've always had my choice of bottoms but very few guys willing to top me. What has changed besides getting older and heavier, is that I can only cum 2-3 times in a night versus 5-7 when I was younger. I still love to both top and bottom.

[hntnhole]

6 hours ago, ErosWired said:

perhaps there are those here who can give us some perspective. Was the bottom/Top situation like this back in the Golden Age pre-HIV?

I had already been living in Chicago for a number of years before hiv came along, everyone had sex (obviously, sans condoms*) with everyone else, and at the drop of a hat.  It didn't amount to much more than saying something like "hi - let's fuck" in the bars.  As I recall, there were plenty of guys on both sides of the issue (T & b), but - it was a long time ago too.  I do remember that at the gh joints, guys would suck Cocks through the gh's, and then very carefully switch from mouth to hand, stand up, turn around, and try to "stealth" the Cock up their Hole, without the other guy knowing it.  This was as hiv was racing through the community, and almost everyone was afraid to fuck raw, since guys were dropping like flies.  

I think one of the reasons there appears to be a dearth of Tops, is the advent and subsequent widespread use of dick-shrinking drugs.  I used poppers occasionally, but I'm referencing the "hard" junk so widespread today.  It just wasn't around that much, and usually associated with cocaine/needles/lighters & spoons, 'drug-dens" on the South Side**, etc.  Not all that many guys were interested in drugs over sex, as I recall.  I know that a lot of bottoms are complaining about a lack of Tops lately, but if a guy inclined to Top more than bottom chooses being a junkie over being a Breeder, well ..... choices are choices.  

*I do recall hearing about guys that had fetish-ized condoms, which - back then - seemed silly to me, and if I ever met one, I didn't know it.  They were a minority within a minority though. 

**obviously, a mistaken, ignorant, racially-based supposition

[hoodtight]

12 minutes ago, hntnhole said:

I had already been living in Chicago for a number of years before hiv came along, everyone had sex (obviously, sans condoms*) with everyone else, and at the drop of a hat.  It didn't amount to much more than saying something like "hi - let's fuck" in the bars.  As I recall, there were plenty of guys on both sides of the issue (T & b), but - it was a long time ago too.  I do remember that at the gh joints, guys would suck Cocks through the gh's, and then very carefully switch from mouth to hand, stand up, turn around, and try to "stealth" the Cock up their Hole, without the other guy knowing it.  This was as hiv was racing through the community, and almost everyone was afraid to fuck raw, since guys were dropping like flies.  

I think one of the reasons there appears to be a dearth of Tops, is the advent and subsequent widespread use of dick-shrinking drugs.  I used poppers occasionally, but I'm referencing the "hard" junk so widespread today.  It just wasn't around that much, and usually associated with cocaine/needles/lighters & spoons, 'drug-dens" on the South Side**, etc.  Not all that many guys were interested in drugs over sex, as I recall.  I know that a lot of bottoms are complaining about a lack of Tops lately, but if a guy inclined to Top more than bottom chooses being a junkie over being a Breeder, well ..... choices are choices.  

*I do recall hearing about guys that had fetish-ized condoms, which - back then - seemed silly to me, and if I ever met one, I didn't know it.  They were a minority within a minority though. 

**obviously, a mistaken, ignorant, racially-based supposition

Thx for your experience. So sad there is so few tops or that some of them was taken by drugs. We need more breeders!

[NLbear]

Bottoms have always been in the majority is my experience. And yes, plenty of tops are looking for <30 or <40. So when I hit 30/40 the hit ups decreased. Or I didn't hit up someone because that age range was in their profile. But a whole new range seemed to appear: younger guys wanting to fuck a Daddy.

The first time someone called me a Daddy I was shocked. I didn't see myself being one. Still had that image in my head of me being someone younger. That changed after a young buck enthousiastically fucked me and pumped a few loads in me. One after the other. Well fuck me! If it's a Daddy they want I'll be a Daddy! 😉

I have been enjoying 'sons' ever since. Sure, there are not hundreds of them, certainly not where I live, but enough to keep me busy and satisfied even though I don't have sex as often as I used to have when I was younger.

 

[Guest]

2 hours ago, NLbear said:

The first time someone called me a Daddy I was shocked. I didn't see myself being one. Still had that image in my head of me being someone younger. That changed after a young buck enthousiastically fucked me and pumped a few loads in me. One after the other. Well fuck me! If it's a Daddy they want I'll be a Daddy! 😉

I have been enjoying 'sons' ever since. Sure, there are not hundreds of them, certainly not where I live, but enough to keep me busy and satisfied even though I don't have sex as often as I used to have when I was younger.

I agree with you on here, i have the same thing, i never thought myself i was a young dad until i was called exactly that but the guy calling me that was a lot younger & wanted to fuck. Who was i to say no, so i let it happen, honestly to me age is just a number like so many things, i don't have hang ups about age even though there are guys who are obsessed about stats always complaining they cannot find what they want ( that is the reason ) if they lowered there expectations & dumped there shopping list what a guy must have etc they will find enough contenders.

[NLbear]

It's actually a bit weird there are so many more bottoms than tops. Considering the time and effort it takes a bottom to be ready to fuck (cleaning out). Basically all a top has to do is whip out his cock and fuck....

So there must be something about bottoming a lot of guys like 😉

 

[DirtyLoadBear]

Fat stubby curved dick with a huge load shooter 

[austin_submale]

9 hours ago, DirtyLoadBear said:

Fat stubby curved dick with a huge load shooter 

You going to be in Austin any time?

 

[garsento]

Speaking as someone who has shifted from being versatile to being—at most vers bottom, I don't think I have had this problem. I bottom for most of the guys I regularly play with, and in scenes like sex parties I can also usually find guys who would want to top me.

It is true that I never encounter situations where everyone I would like to fuck me does so, but that is life.

[muscmtl]

Tons of them around, but they cant pass the "big dick?" "Huge dick" "at least 8" roadblocks

[hntnhole]

On 6/18/2022 at 11:45 PM, Ieatcumholes said:

As a top, I'm not really into the anonymous hookup scene - the connection is just about as important to me as the fucking.

Well, I am, for a couple of reasons:  

1.  It's just not all that enticing to get hook-ups on the apps in this burg.  I don't happen to want drugs in my home, or guys that have just used, and this town is soaked in drugs. 

2.  Which means, by default I hit the public places far more than private homes (mine or someone else's).  In the public bars/backrooms/fuckjoints I don't have a dog in the fight whether some guy is high as a kite.  I'll fuck him from here to there, and then on to the next one.  There's nothing but the Lust involved, and no guy flying on who-knows-what is going to pull any deleterious stunts in a public place.  

3.  It's clearly not conducive to achieving that "connection" I like to go on about, but it can happen in the fuckjoints.  Then again, I'm not really in the market for a relationship (a-la live-in) so there's that too.  I've widened my focus - a "connection" is great, but a real connection, i.e. "relationship", isn't my goal at this point.  If it happens, that would be lightening striking twice, and lightning just doesn't like to do that.

[YourNoLimitsBottom]

On 6/19/2022 at 1:48 AM, BlackDude said:

The gay  tops are here. We’re waiting for the bottoms to stop chasing “straight” married guys. 

Yeah, I never understood this. I mean we all have our preferences. If "straight" married guys are what make your motor run, have at it! I've seen so many ads looking for likewise married, maybe for mutually assured discretion?

Give me a gay top any day, a guy that is into fucking me and not imagining the woman he couldn't get in the heat of the moment.