First time fucked. Unexpected and shocking

[BBBxCumDumpster]

13 hours ago, norefusal said:

when it comes to sex: "life is a banquette and most poor suckers are starving to death!" 🐷

Probably my favorite movie of all time!  I watch it when I'm feeling blue!

[Teeslad70]

I've been on a bit of a downer recently if I'm honest.

It disgusts me when I think about what I did. Piss in my face and letting it run in and out of my mouth. I think I did it because I am a worthless person.

But despite that feeling, I just felt valued in that moment to receive. Taking whatever comes. 

It doesn't make sense to me and it's really playing on my mind:(

[Teeslad70]

Sorry for turning this into something a bit deep and depressing.

[RubberAustria]

5 hours ago, Teeslad70 said:

It disgusts me when I think about what I did. Piss in my face and letting it run in and out of my mouth. I think I did it because I am a worthless person.

No, you are not a worthless person. You are just trying new sexual things that are not forbidden by law!! So relax. Piss play: some like it in the face, some on the body, some forced drinking, some up in the asss. Some like the smell or taste. It seems that you are into degradation. So enjoy it!  Last weekend I was  at a piss party in Munich and saw a lot of action. But I also saw that we were nice normal guys that were just talking and joking during the refill of the bladder. Big hug

[Teeslad70]

21 hours ago, RubberAustria said:

No, you are not a worthless person. You are just trying new sexual things that are not forbidden by law!! So relax. Piss play: some like it in the face, some on the body, some forced drinking, some up in the asss. Some like the smell or taste. It seems that you are into degradation. So enjoy it!  Last weekend I was  at a piss party in Munich and saw a lot of action. But I also saw that we were nice normal guys that were just talking and joking during the refill of the bladder. Big hug

Thank you. I just wish I understood myself.

[versamarried]

21 hours ago, Teeslad70 said:

Thank you. I just wish I understood myself.

It may take a while and important to not rush or force understanding prematurely. Processing through the tough emotions helps to point you to the right conclusions.

It was a good 30 long years of exploring before I could finally understand my bisexuality and kinks. There were definitely moments where I pushed my boundaries a bit too far and other times my frustrations were on times I settled for less and felt unfulfilled. It was a good 10 years after having sex with men that I was also able to clearly understand that with men I am a 100% total bareback bottom.