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My nephew told me that he's gay


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He's my cousin's child and I'm also his godfather (in Greece that's a big thing). Some days ago she called me really upset. She would always call me for medical "emergencies" like oh I forgot to take this vitamin today am I going to die? She's being doing this from when I started medical school when I was 20. Now she was more upset than ever. She asked me to see me at my place. I was like "what will it be this time". And she said that my nephew is gay. That was quite a shock. I haven't told her that I'm gay either (I'm a coward I know). I felt "guilty". The same guilt that I was feeling when my mother was asking me if I'm a fagot when she saw a magazine with a shirtless dude on my desk.

She said that she believes her nephew not only is gay but he's also having a bf (I was like that's lovely everybody wants a bf). She said that I should examine him. I explained her that being gay is not a disease and since it's not one it can't be somehow "examined". If he's gay that can't change. What we can change is accept him and make him feel safe. She said that he should see a therapist. I told her that if he feels like it, then he should but not to turn straight. He will discuss things that worry him. If she has trouble with gays, she should have therapy.

I talked with him yesterday. I told him that I love him and I will always protect him. He said that he knows. I felt very happy when I heard that. He told me that he's gay, that he has a bf and that he's very worried about how his mother will react. He cried his heart in my arms. We also have the issue that his mother doesn't want him to be an architect but his mother won't pay for drawing classes (here you need to take drawing classes for 1-2 in parallel with school because you are examined in these but never taught). I told him not to worry and that I will pay for his classes. He cried even more. I didn't tell him about me being gay. I told my bf though that there's a slight chance I adopted my nephew.

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4 hours ago, Sharp-edge said:

I told my bf though that there's a slight chance I adopted my nephew.

You don't need me to tell you, but you're a good man. Your nephew has a really great uncle. 

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You need to tell him at some point.  Not that he feels alone now but it might help him to know that someone that loves him and that he loves really understands.   You are a good uncle.  

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You are the better uncle and demonstrated you have better parenting quality. And tell his mother that she is the person that NEEDS therapy. Tell her she a bad mother. Hit her in the core. 

Edited by BlueSaphir
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  • 1 month later...

How lucky he is to have you in his corner 

I hope you are able to come out to him soon- so he has a role model… and so he doesn’t think this is something that needs to be hidden 

And i agree..  it is his mom who needs therapy 

Looking forward to updates as to how things work out …. Sending lots of positive energy your way 

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I’m wondering how you can be so loving and supporting to your godson but not give yourself the same? Specifically I mean coming out (at very minimum to your godson). It’s negative energy to have to hide yourself from people you care about and you clearly are a man with a ton of positive energy for others; be that to yourself.  

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