Sexual Trends

[SubOhioBttm]

On 6/14/2025 at 4:47 PM, BBBxCumDumpster said:

In contemporary porn it's almost the norm. 

You're right. I think that this is what is at crux of this change. Gay porn was hard to find in the 70's and 80's. You had to go to a XXX theater, or a video booth porn shop. With the rise of the internet, and the ease with which all people can access porn - gay, strait and anything goes - people tend to crave  something 'more' or 'new'... Harder hard core,  more kink, push the extremes. It's somewhat like that in all forms of 'art'. What we see in cinema now would never have been seen 3 decades ago. Horror films from the 70' and 80's scared the shit out of me. The Exorcist in 73 pushed every boundary, and sold millions. I watch it now, and it seems almost tame to some of the slasher horror films of today.  

 

On 6/14/2025 at 4:47 PM, BBBxCumDumpster said:

I'm not complaining about trend but noticing the way we have sex now is different than it used to be.  At least in my experience.  Does anyone else remember differently?

 I'm not complaining either. It is different. I didn't know what was out there when I started. Now, it's easy to see the extremes. I remember this much the same as you.  I appreciate your thoughtful post.  Thanks!  

[ffabbian]

Years ago I spent hours with a guy  kissing and simulating sex. Not fucking, no oral, no rimming, just kissing and our bodies grinding against each other. It felt like the best sex for both us. We were at a house party at the time and when we finally fucked at his flat it was just as good. 

I love to kiss. It instantly turns me on or off the guy.  I'm more comfortable with fucking and fisting with a random guy   and not ar all comfortable with hugging. It's too personal and I have to really like the guy  first otherwise it's too weird. 

[ffabbian]

32 minutes ago, SubOhioBttm said:

You're right. I think that this is what is at crux of this change. Gay porn was hard to find in the 70's and 80's. You had to go to a XXX theater, or a video booth porn shop. With the rise of the internet, and the ease with which all people can access porn - gay, strait and anything goes - people tend to crave  something 'more' or 'new'... Harder hard core,  more kink, push the extremes. It's somewhat like that in all forms of 'art'. What we see in cinema now would never have been seen 3 decades ago. Horror films from the 70' and 80's scared the shit out of me. The Exorcist in 73 pushed every boundary, and sold millions. I watch it now, and it seems almost tame to some of the slasher horror films of today.  

 

 I'm not complaining either. It is different. I didn't know what was out there when I started. Now, it's easy to see the extremes. I remember this much the same as you.  I appreciate your thoughtful post.  Thanks!  

I don't know. I was into fisting and rimming before I saw any fisting and rimming porn

[NastyRawBottom]

I have a questions for anyone who’s lived through it. 

Were cumdumps as prevalent after AIDS but before PrEP? Was the lifestyle much different?

I feel like so many bottoms want to become cumdumps now or feel like they have to be. When I started being a cumdump in the mid-2010s it was still relatively rare and [banned word]. If you were a cumdump, you were pretty much a bugchaser. PrEP did already exist but it wasn’t as well marketed or understood. I never took it.

I feel like many more bottoms are comfortable being cumdumps cause of PrEP and now Doxy. 

So I wonder how the cumdump lifestyle was in the years before I started. 

[Iker80]

I was born in the late 80s so I don't remember those times, but I have seen changes. There's a lot more talk about sub and dom, even guys are asking me which one am I like you have to be one of them. But it's not really my thing. I can be rough or let another guy be rough with me, but I don't turn it on and off as part of my everyday way of being. Usually with guys I meet things are more mutual and whatever energy we find happens naturally. But that can be rough, I recently met a guy about my size who handled me rougher than I expected. I was growling and really wanted to give him a kick, but he was hot and doing a good job so I was also growling and swearing because I was annoyed I was enjoying it. Interesting energy between us. I don't think I've become a sub now though, it was just something that happened. It's the trying to create situations that seems to be more popular now. The thing is it doesn't feel so natural for me when you're trying to make it happen.

[MuscledHorse]

On 6/14/2025 at 4:47 PM, BBBxCumDumpster said:

When I was coming of age in New York in the 80's sexual habits were different. I'm speaking from my many many experiences and from porn then and now.  For one thing, you didn't hear sub or submisssive or top or bottom often.  You were French active ( you suck) and Greek passive (you got fucked.) Now those expressions are antiquated. But bottoms aren't just bottoms: now, many are submissive, implying they want aggressive tops. 

And speaking  of tops, they generally didn't hold your head and fuck your throat or gag or choke you.   That seems much more prevalent in the last  25 years or so.  I experience it nearly every time I bottom. In contemporary porn it's almost the norm.  And ass- eating wasn't the norm either.  Now, in RL and porn, nobody gets fucked without being eaten out. I remember one time getting my add eaten in the 80's. I'm not complaining about trend but noticing the way we have sex now is different than it used to be.  At least in my experience.  Does anyone else remember differently?

Many things have changed since I was in college and being a slut. Social media has been the biggest influence. IN the 1990's porn scenes with massive toys or fisting were "controversial" and only available on the purchased version. First time I saw Falcon's "Flashpoint" scene with the massive toys and (first time in porn) traffic cone) and a bottom so gaped it was jaw dropping for the time, I knew I wanted that to be my hole. But X-Tube changed all that as it brought the kink world into easily accessible view. The result has been an uptick in all the things you describe because it's been seen in self made porn. Guys like me with an anus and rectum so overstretched out size and depth skills rival a mare, can easily be seen and viewed (I'm jaredEriksonXXX on X and Bluesky). When I teach fisting classes I have to caution guys that what you see in porn is only a small part of what goes on in actual fisting because film requires action since the viewers can't see or feel small hand movements inside the bottom, which can be as intense and pleasurable for the bottom as any of the punching and such that you so see on film.

[hntnhole]

On 7/7/2025 at 8:57 AM, NastyRawBottom said:

Were cumdumps as prevalent after AIDS but before PrEP? Was the lifestyle much different?

In a word, no.  

After hiv arrived, there were a handful, of course, that just didn't care; they became infected and passed on.  I lived in Chicago at the time, and bars closed, the gh joints closed, and boystown was deserted after dark.  Nobody fucked anybody without a condom, and precious few even did that.  Whole neighborhoods turned into ghost-towns.  

Once the medical arts progressed to the point that AZT came along, some guys that were on it started fucking again, but my other half and I were still shy of going out to fuck as we had before.  AZT was considered to be at least a chance at avoiding hiv, but it took quite a while (several years) before we all returned to our former glory.  

[PaganzofLA]

This really the topic of the eleventh hour—to which, as a counter point as well as a verification, I encourage you all to make a ‘truth social account’ to experience for yourself the flavor of the ‘silent’ trend specifically occurring in the online queer social networking hook-up apps. This trend I would call the red-haring or inflated pseudo-trend. As it is said, there is nothing new under the sun, and this is especially true among gay online community.  And instead of a bonafide gay real estate arising from the inter-webs, we got the ‘borrowed’ visibility on the self-censoring ‘big’ platforms or the ‘all the cock you can eat plus some’ hook-up sites. And simply for the lack of innovation this stagnation has bottlenecked the queer community into the portrait that being painted of there on truth social—most likely by the same self-loathing faggots who show-up here on queer sacred ground to promote their agenda. Remember everything has to be talked about. the moment you cannot speak of a thing is the moment it has claimed power over you. I say, keep it fresh, kinky, viral & real… old school baby, Donna Summers, Grand Funkmaster, Studio54 style do it on the dance floor mutha-fuckers!!

[verbalBTTM]

On 7/7/2025 at 8:57 AM, NastyRawBottom said:

I have a questions for anyone who’s lived through it. 

Were cumdumps as prevalent after AIDS but before PrEP? Was the lifestyle much different?

I feel like so many bottoms want to become cumdumps now or feel like they have to be. When I started being a cumdump in the mid-2010s it was still relatively rare and [banned word]. If you were a cumdump, you were pretty much a bugchaser. PrEP did already exist but it wasn’t as well marketed or understood. I never took it.

I feel like many more bottoms are comfortable being cumdumps cause of PrEP and now Doxy. 

So I wonder how the cumdump lifestyle was in the years before I started. 

I remember those days very well, and no cum dumps were rare, or rarely advertised. PREP was still in the experimental stages and 2 of my friends were volunteers and they caught HIV just like the rest. When I first came out I asked the oldest men I could find, "how did you survive". They all told me you're either a top or in a strictly monogamous relationship. 

I was recently going through some old photos and ran across a pic of me and 20 of my old friends when were we hanging at riis beach. We were all young and naked and having a great time. The thing that stopped me and made me cry is I remember going to all of there funerals. I'm the only one who is still alive. Most of them passed on from HIV complications like pneumonia, a few others passed due to over taxing their bodies from extended drug use.

I was the conservative one when going out. I would drink and smoke some pot, but mainly left the rest of the stuff alone or partook lightly. Guys from my generation and the ones before me were scared to hook-up with just anyone. We would need to know more information before going there, you could call it an interview for sex. When meth became popular in the early 2000's the death toll raised pretty quickly at least for me. 

PREP is a total game changer for gay life, never before have I seen so many guys do the things that they do and live past the 2-4 year mark. You never saw breeding parties except in strictly controlled BDSM arrangements. Sure they existed but not for people who were HIV-. Those days were scary, but also exciting in a way. You assumed everyone was HIV+ and proceeded at your own risk. We also had a tighter community where we supported each other unlike today, because that's all we had. There was no social acceptance for gay life and the only people you could rely on were your friends.

A lot has changed since those days and I'm really happy for the younger guys. They get to live the life we all wanted to, but for us older guys our mental scars prevent us from doing those things the same way. Today the medicine for HIV is much better with fewer negative effects and longer life outcomes.