rawTOP

It's important to note that your risk does not increase per incident. It's always the same, but the cumulative risk increases. The other thing to look at in these studies is when the data are from. If I remember correctly this particular study used pre-ARV data, so now that most poz guys are undetectable the risks are much less.

My understanding was that a partial CCR5 mutation slowed the replication of HIV in the body and thereby reduced viral loads and slowed the progression. I think I was using the wrong definitely of "long term non-progressors". I was including slow progressors which apparently are a different group entirely.

Here's an article which goes into some of the new research on "long term non-progressors" (the people who are poz and never get sick or needs meds) - happens about 1 in 200 people with HIV... http://www.myfoxatlanta.com/dpps/health/best-aids-defense%3A-good-genes-luck-dpgoha-20100702-fc_8445366 I'm a little confused by the article myself. I always though long term non-progressors were the people who were "HIV-resistant" due to a partial CCR-5 gene mutation. The article says it's actually due to cell-surface proteins called HLAs. Maybe the people who are resistant are just slow progressors (as opposed to non-progressors). Either way, I really think people should know where they stand on these things early on in being poz since it affects their treatment plan. There's no point rushing into meds if you're body can handle things on its own.

I think the clinic literature (and even advice from "counselors") totally overstates the risk to the top. That said, the risk isn't zero and if you're unlucky (or just destined to get it) it can happen all sorts of "low risk" ways...

There's a preview video over on my porn blog on my review of the scene. More pics too... http://www.rawtop.com/porn/2010-07/breeding-20-yo-boy-butt

[i just broke these posts off into their own thread so we didn't have two different discussions going on at the same time.] TwinkCC raises an interesting dilemma - with kids start to bareback when they're very young it's pretty complicated for them when it comes to STDs and the like. In other posts he's said he started barebacking at 13. So what does someone like him do for the next 5 or 6 years before they're out from under their parent's watchful eye? OK, the parent might not be that watchful - they don't know their kid is getting loads of cum in their ass, but they will find out if the kid gets an STD or tests poz. If they're in a major city there will probably be a clinic they can go to for confidential medical care (here in NYC Callen Lorde has the HOTT program for teens), but what if the kid isn't in a major city and only has access to the family doctor? No wonder some of them don't want to know - they think the social impact with their family is far worse than anything HIV can do. But the problem is that if they got HIV early (at 13 or 14) they'll be waiting too long to get diagnosed and it will really have a huge impact on their health and life expectancy.

Most of the people I know socially have no clue I'm rawTOP. In fact, most don't even know I make about half my money off porn. I just say I do web and database projects and if they ask questions I tell them about my mainstream clients. My bf and really close friends know pretty much everything. Then there's a group who know I work on porn, but don't know which sites are mine. There was a time when I was going around fucking guys bareback and my bf didn't know much of anything. But we worked all that out 5+ years ago. I don't tell him every time I fuck someone, but if he asks, I answer truthfully. @tampafun - Do you worry about becoming poz and giving it to your girlfriend?

Interesting you post this after some of your more negative comments in other threads. I see where you're at now - you're in the angst phase. It will pass and you'll be a lot more accepting in the next year or two. Just remember the angst is all self-created. You can end it whenever you want to by just giving in and becoming a cumdump. The other details will just sorta sort themselves out. It's actually good I saw this post 'cause after reading your comments about neg sub bottoms and poz guys disclosing their status I was wondering what to do with you - not sure I wanted that level of negativity on the forum. Do try to be a bit more accepting of others in your comments. I'm really trying to make sure people never feel attacked here.

You're asking the poz guy to be responsible for the neg guy's health. The poz top's only responsibility is to not lie when asked. The neg guy is responsible for his own health. Sorry, but I'm a firm believer in personal responsibility. I also believe in 90+% of the cases the guy who becomes poz pozzed himself by taking risks of one sort or another. No. Not closed at all for a number of reasons. First, not that many gay guys die of HIV/AIDS these days - smoking kills 5 times more gay guys than HIV, and people aren't all that concerned about smoking. And on top of that the people who are dying are people who found out too late, have had it for a very long time (pre-ARVs), or just don't follow their doctor's advice about treatment. The issue these days is not so much whether you become poz, but whether you get tested quickly enough so you start treatment in a timely manner.

I used to think I wanted a Prince's Wand too... Then I tried sounding. The urethra is incredibly sensitive. I may still get a short one one of these days, but I'm not jonesing for it like I used to.

I've never gotten a tattoo 'cause I couldn't imagine one that would look good on me. I mean I think tattoos look great on thin and muscular guys, but not sure I like them so well on guys with my body type. Here's a pic of my body from last year anyone want to suggest a tattoo that would look good on me? I should mention I think tattoos look best when they've got a design to them. I really don't like random tattoos on random parts of the body. If I had to get one now I'd probably say something on my shoulder or maybe an entire "sleeve" tattoo (though that would take a fair amount of commitment). Oh, the other reason why I don't get a tattoo is 'cause I hate needles... At least with piercings the needle part is over quickly.

I think #10 is saying it's your responsibility to clean up after your master. If he makes a mess of your ass and you get an STD as a result, you need to take care of it quickly. I think #10 also means when you become poz you should do whatever your doctor says so you reduce your downtime due to illness. Imagine if you could get to that point now... A 21 y.o. fuckhole slave would be a prized possession for just about any serious master.

Yeah, I've damaged bottom's holes (temporarily) with my PA. One of those times was a gangbang and the bottom wasn't able to take more dick after that, and then it came out that one of the other tops who had fucked the bottom was poz (when he said he was neg), and there was a whole bunch of drama since I had really roughed up his hole when it was full of poz cum. He later tested neg. Either he's immune/resistant or the poz top was undetectable and shooting blanks. Tops who constantly pull out and shove back in would damage the hole even more. It's not a gentle fuck no matter how you do it.

Just curious - the first time you got fucked - did you take the cock raw or did the top rubber up? What year was it? (Was it before ARVs came out?) If you rubbered up, was it because you wanted him to or because he insisted on it? In my case it was early 1990. He did a few strokes bareback (which worried me), but then rubbered up.

Worse - if you actually "get to know" the guy before sex it may kill your hardon. YEARS ago when I'd do that I almost never had sex with guys after I heard their life story. They were "nice", but I wasn't looking to fuck "nice". ALWAYS fuck, then get to know the guy - or just fuck and don't get to know the guy - even better!

Well put. When you look at the data the people who are dying of AIDS these days fall into two categories - 1) People who've been poz for a long time and are dealing with problems that started before they starting taking modern ARVs and 2) People who don't get tested and don't find out until it's too late and HIV has totally fucked up their immune system. Notice both groups are people who took ARVs after the damage had been done. So get tested - at least every couple years (preferably every year). You can live a very long life if you know your poz and do what your doctor tells you to do. That's not something to be scared of.

The sub bottom standing me up yesterday has me thinking... Can a true submissive bottom reasonably expect to stay HIV negative? I mean good sub bottoms don't say 'no'... Take a look at these rules someone came up with... The funny part was the sub who had that list as a pic in his profile failed to address me as SIR. Why is it so hard to find a good submissive bottom these days? So the question is can a good sub bottom reasonably expect to stay HIV negative? Rule #9 says "forget limits". And in this particular context #8 basically says a slave's master may want him to take poz loads (and even become poz) to make him a better slave. You can see throughout the list that slaves are never supposed to say 'no'. Neg slaves sometimes do say 'no' when the top is poz, so a poz slave is a "better slave" because he doesn't say 'no'. That's the heart of the issue - the best slaves don't say 'no' and as a result they usually wind up poz. The sub who disrespected me yesterday isn't just a bottom with submissive tendencies. When you meet him you can tell he's a real sub. He'll lick your dirty toilets. He likes reeking of stale piss, etc. But he's got this strong desire to stay neg and it's in conflict with his being a good slave who doesn't say 'no'. Do any of you identify with this conundrum? Are you a sub who had to come to terms with the fact that not saying 'no' meant you were going to wind up poz?

So the question yesterday was do poz guys tell the truth when they're asked about their HIV status? Seems most at least say they do. So today I'm wondering how many how many poz guys have online profiles (they actively use) that say they're neg instead of poz. I realize most of the time when it happens it's just poz guys not wanting to be public about their HIV status so they lie on their profile to throw off casual acquaintances, coworkers and the like. I guess the follow up question is when you say you're neg in your profile do you actually tell the guy you hookup with your poz before you hookup? Based on my experience there are lots of guys who say they're neg who I just don't believe and they never say anything. Is that just because they're bottoming and think there's no risk for me? Do you say something when you top? Or if you're undetectable do you just figure it's the equivalent (risk-wise) of being neg, and it's none of their business?

I've got a PA... Would I recommend a top get one? Not sure... For a bottom, absolutely, but a top has to stop fucking for a pretty long time to wait for it to heal. I'm not sure it's worth it for a top. I mean a bottom doesn't need his dick to be a bottom. A top needs his dick. Now if you're versatile you can always go into bottom mode for a while... If I remember correctly, I got mine January 5th, 1996 on the one year anniversary of my boyfriend's death. I was dating a guy at the time - a total bottom who got me into thinking of myself as a bareback top who just dumps load after load in a bottom's hole. He was pretty insatiable - we'd spend whole weekends just fucking seeing how many loads I could give him. Anyway, Valentines Day came around and I hadn't fucked for nearly 6 weeks and it was killing me. I took it out, fucked him, and then tried to get it back in and couldn't stomach sticking a piece of metal through a hole that was still very sensitive. The other problem I had was that I'm a grower not a shower, so they underestimated the size of the ring I needed (or pierced me further back than they should have). As a result, every time I got hard I'd upset the healing of the piercing. In both of those cases I should have gone back to the piercing shop and let them fix the problem, but I didn't. I gave up on the PA, thought it had closed up and then realized over a year later that there was still a very small hole there. At that point I really wanted the PA again so I spent months stretching it until I could fit the smallest of rings into it. At that point I was able to stretch it pretty quickly. So that's a lot of the negative stuff. The positive side is that now that I've got it, I'm glad I do and I wouldn't want to give it up. I've gone months without wearing it, but it's cool that whenever I feel like putting it in I can. In terms of sensations, when I first got it I loved the sensation. Made me get hard all the time feeling it tugging on my dick, constantly reminding me of sex. Even though I've got a really heavy ring in I don't get that sensation any more, but it's still cool to have it. In terms of fucking... I like fucking with it, but a lot of bottoms can't take it, so I remove it before fucking unless they say they want to get fucked with it. The bottom does have to be extra clean. The PA goes deep and digs up shit fairly frequently. But on the plus side once the PA is in the hole it doesn't come out until I'm done, so I don't see the shit until I'm done my business. Bottom line is if you can go without fucking for 2 or 3 months, get one, but that's a hard thing to do for a total top...

Well put. Case and point is a guy who started by taking neg loads, then two years ago at IML he started taking all loads, no questions asked. I was there at Steamworks when he started doing it. It was sorta a special moment. He wrote up his thoughts and I put them on my blog 'cause I thought it was important to document what goes through someone's head at that moment. I highly recommend reading what he wrote... http://www.rawtop.com/blog/2008-06/thoughts-of-a-neg-bareback-bottom-taking-all-loads He became poz a few months later. Now he's a proud cumhole who gets as many loads as he can. He's on here actually. He was at the last IML and posted here saying he was looking for loads. Not all bareback bottoms become cumdumps, but it does happen - even when you start out "Neg4Neg".

Do you ask the top his status or just wait for him to bring it up? While I realize there's a legal obligation to disclose in some places, personally I don't feel the poz top should be required to bring the topic up. I think the old "assume everyone is poz" is still good advice today. If the neg guy needs to ask.

This is Pride Weekend in most major cities in the US... Enjoy! I remember one gay pride weekend long ago when this guy came up to me and when I was hesitant to take him home he said "it's gay pride - you gotta have sex on gay pride." If I remember right I did take him home So guys - get out there, let down your inhibitions and give some loads and take some loads. Personally, I sorta want to hookup today. I've got a 3 day load in my balls, but I've only got a couple hours before there's stuff I have to do with friends and Saturdays are usually the ay when I just veg out. So it looks like I won't be hooking up until tomorrow. Still, I'll do what I can to give someone my load this weekend.

Glad you guys approve! I sorta thought he'd be good. He's intelligent and piggy - always a good combination... Looks like I might be starting French and Portuguese and maybe even a Japanese porn blog... I'll know more in a week or so. I'm looking forward to reaching a broader audience.

Be VERY careful answering this question. I do not tolerate links or discussion of illegal tube sites, or things like rapidshare sites. However, there is plenty of free legal porn out there which you're more than welcome to discuss...

I've put up my first non-English porn blog - it's Spanish. There are still a few finishing details (which are somewhat obvious), but it's 95% ready. Here's the URL... http://www.rawtop.com/porno-es/ If guys who know Spanish can take a look at it and comment on it, it would help a lot. Here are some of the issues... Overall, does it "work" for a Spanish-speaking audience? Is it appealing, interesting, etc.? Second, what do you think of the writing of the guy I have working for me? Does he have a good writing style? I've given him a lot of latitude... And lastly, do you see anything that needs to change? I know there are still a few items left in there that are English. Hopefully I'll have time to get them out tomorrow... I should mention I understand sending Spanish speakers off to English language sites is not ideal. That's just a limitation of what I'm working with. This is a bit of an experiment to see if that makes any sense... Thanks for your help!