BredByJ

After losing my guy 47 days before. I finally met another guy on Saturday. This time it was me who said I wanted it raw. I told him to come to my house and I'd be on the bed, ass up and ready for him to slide in me raw, then leave. I wanted to pretend it was John. But he couldn't keep his hands off of me and started feeling my chest and ass, rubbing against me and sucking my nipples, then licking and fingering my hole until I was open and ready. He told me to get on my knees and suck him until he was hard and ready, then he fucked me until he was about to cum. He pulled out and told me to suck the cum out of him, which I did then he put it back in my ass and just ground into me until he was hard again. He fucked me so hard until he blew his second load inside of me, It was honestly amazing, but I felt nothing other than it being a great fuck. He asked if we could do this again every Saturday and some week days when if he can leave work early and I said yes.

This loss was so bad, I honestly didn't care if the test came back positive. I've always been a whore and this was the first guy I ever had feelings for, so if the test came back poz, I was in the mindset I would let it just take me.

I haven't been tested since March 29, 2022, and have since taken so many loads from John, who died almost a month ago. I have an appointment with my oncologist today and will have full blood panels, including HIV. A part of me wants it to come back POZ... I don't know why, but I know it won't. I forgot about this appointment last month when he died and scheduled an appointment for tomorrow to have full STI testing, which I should probably cancel.

I didn't plan on being monogamous with my most recent guy. He brought it up after a couple of months and told me he was only fucking me and he liked the idea of knowing he "could safely slide into me". I told him I hadn't let anyone else fuck me since he started. Soon after, he started talking about "taking me at some point". And I wanted it, even though I never topped before.

Happened to me at the beginning with my first long-time top. He didn't seem to mind but I was horrified that I had to go clean up mid getting fucked.

When I was 27 I was messing around with this doctor named Michael. He told me he was 40, but was more like 55 and had a thing about getting blown and fucking me at his golf club in Melrose, MA. It was always just through the bushes, where other guys were golfing, just feet away. The bushes weren't very thick and I never knew if they could see us and this was a public viewing I wasn't in on. but it was hot.

I didn’t give John my phone number the first time we met in 2020, only an email I used for guys I was not comfortable giving my phone number to and he emailed me shortly after. This is what was said. I knew I needed to let him do whatever he needed from me because of what he said to me at that restaurant we met and from his second response to in email. He told me there were hundreds before me, possibly even more than that and it turned me on so much that he refused to take no for an answer and was used to getting his way. This is how the conversation went for over a year before fucking. John: Need a bottom host to use and breed. (Sends along with a picture of his dick next to a glade air freshener can) Me: So tempting, your cock is just beautiful, but never did raw and not planning on doing it. Sorry John: I’m looking for a regular sub bottom to suck me, lick my balls, and take my load Me: I don’t do raw John: We could try mutual oral 69 if you want to cum too or just be my bitch to knock up Me: You are smooth John: I need to cum and find a regular hole to fill Me: That would be amazing but I’m not doing that with you or anyone else. It’s been a while and would definitely get ripped by a dick like that. Too risky for me. John: Let me slide in you doggy style and pump a load into you while you reach back and massage my balls Me: Are you 100% sure you're clean? I want to get fucked raw so bad, I am just afraid to. John: 109% sure I’m clean and need to stay that way too Me: This is something I have to really think about 3 hours later John: are you still looking to let me breed you Next day John: You still looking to be fucked and bred Me: When did I say I was ready to do that? John: Send me some photos of my cum dumpster Me: Okay John: You want to get knocked up doggy style or missionary Me: Doggy might be easier at first with a cock like that but I’m not letting you fuck me without a condom. John: You submissive just want to please your man? i need a sub bottom craving to feel my cock shoot my load in them

Thank you all. He was a great guy and I will miss him for the rest of my life. My only regret is not starting this when we first met, but even during that time I have great memories. He was used to getting his way and was the man of many firsts. Rest in peace, John.

I met him almost two years ago and refused to let him fuck me because he insisted on fucking me raw. We talked for over a year, never acknowledging the constant refusals. He was hot, 6'4 blonde, with blue eyes and a nice big dick, but had a lifelong heart problem. Finally, I said fuck it at the beginning of the year and let him fuck me raw for the first time and never stopped until he died three weeks ago. I am lost without him right now. A couple of months ago he started saying he had never taken a cock in his ass and wanted me to breed him at some point, even though I'm very small. We simulated it a few times and he let me fuck him with my fingers the last few times but never got to put it in him. He needed me to be smooth and kind of fem when we first started fucking, which I did for him, even dressed, but in the end, he wanted me as a guy and would say don't shave your face and stuff like that. I've been approached a few times since he died, but can't even bare the thought of another guy's hands on me, even though I need it more than anything right now.

Total sub with a small one here and have only been with a couple guys that were smaller than average. I have to say it does matter for me. A big, thick one ripping into my tight hole feels right.

Got my first load just 3 months ago from this guy that messaged me about a year and a half ago. I flat out told him I would never let a guy cum in me and we talked back and forth for months, while never once acknowledging my refusals. Kept replying about breeding me, sliding in raw and knocking me up. This turned me on so much. Part of me knew (from his first response, never acknowledging that I flat out said no) I was going to let him do whatever he wanted because this guy is used to getting his way. We've been fucking since and now I think he's turning me into his sissy.