jd13

Oh now I envy you being able to visit Vault. I hardly ever get down to London these days and that's awlays my first port of call, especially on a Thursday afternoon/evening. literally step off the train and go straight there! There's a number of techniques I use to keep the laods inside. Might have to write something longer, but basically fighting gravity. I've got good pelvic floor control, and Kegel exercises can actually work core strength deep inside as well. But when I get home, first thing I do is lie face down with a pillow under my hips. Stay there for up to 30mins, give the cum a downward gradient deeper into me. There's other things too... maybe I'll do a post on here at some point. But yeah, I love it. I will work hard for that absorption. Gotta have those cum fragments and DNA swimming into my brain. It's fucked up I know, but...yeah 😉

By the way, on my bike ride home, I worked out that in the past two weeks I have spent more time with one or more strangers' cum inside me than without. If I go to get multifucked at a sauna, my ass won't kick back into gear for 48 to 72 hours, and since I go for total absorption, those bad boy swimmers aint leaving me until that happens. What with two sauna visits the past two weekends, also this cruising (still got the cum in me next morning as I write this btw 😉 ), a quick toilet fuck a couple of Fridays ago I didn't mention, and three or four Grindr/Scruff hookups... ...well as I was pedalling, I worked out that in the past 14 days I have spent a maximum of four days without someone else's cum in my ass. Yes, I took the time to figure that out towards the end of my ride as the jizzjoy subsided. That's just how much my brain is swimming in cum fragments and other men's DNA these days. I sit there and work this shit out! 🤣🤣🤣 Fucking skank, take a bow! 🤣🤣🤣

@PozBearWI Thanks man, I appreciate that. I think I may end up rejoining Curious Chaser in the fullness of time as well, despite a few (entirely subjective and personal) misgivings. We'll see. Those two Brighton boys probably need contacting and visiting! 🤣

Another damn good reason why I write 'em 😉

The closer we get to July, the more I am thinking of getting a VPN. Said before I'd just let it go once July arrived and the curtain came donw. Starting to reconsider that... I really enjoy it here...

I love writing these with the load(s) still in my ass and the taste of cum still in my throat. It's been two hours since that last load and I love it 😉

Just come back from the first afternoon cruise of the year at Armley Mills, Leeds. This time of year it can be a bit hit and miss, but as the weather gets warmer, it starts to fire up. What I like to do is head down the canal on my bike for an hour, stop at Armley Mills for a cruise then head home. If it’s warm, I’ll usually wear shorts, go commando, and go shirtless. Today, not quite warm enough for that so I wore hoodie with no shirt, so I could unzip it and show off the body when cruising. Anything to draw guys in 😉 When I’m there, it’s open season on me as far as I’m concerned. Age range 18 to 70, I don’t give a crap. Just I want cock, in my mouth or ass, and some loads. Today was a success at both ends. The first guy had a few tats, which I like, but he was a bit cagey, eyeing me up, walking past, walking back. I said hi a couple of times, but he seemed nervous. Then he seemed to come to a decision and walked off. A few minutes later, a message from a blank Grindr profile: “You the guy with the bike?” Yes (I mean I have very clear pics, but ok) you the guy with the tats? “Yeah. Not into fucking. Just up to get sucked.” Ok I can do that (my profile title is ‘Cum in my Ass’ with emojis), come back and I’ll make you cum. Sure enough back he comes, and we head to a leafy secluded area when I get down on my knees and give him head. Right now every time I’m giving head I’m seeing it as an opportunity to hone my deep throat skills, so I pretty quickly place his hands on my head and give him control for skullfuck. Five minutes later, I can taste the precum and he pretty quickly shoots down my throat, zips up, walks off without another word. I call back thanks to him once I’ve swallowed, but he’s done with me. As it should be. Not much happens for a bit, although there is a bareback top who turns up. I know he’s BB top because his Grindr profile says so. I wander over, we chat, but he’s obviously biding his time, enjoying his vape and seeing who’s about. Answer: no one aside from me and one other guy who’s interested in neither of us. Anyway after about half an hour, the BB top wanders to the back of the cruising area and I follow. I find him cock out jacking off so I head up, pop my bike against the railings and get down to suck him. He seems to understand I’ll be up for a skullfuck, but he’s gentler than the last guy. His rhythm is a bit more slide in and out, but once again I take his cock into my throat until I taste precum. I pull back, look up, and he makes a turn-around signal with his hand. Don’t have to tell me twice. Spit for lube and I’m ready. He shoves inside me. And fuck, for some reason I’m tight today – good for him but it hurts a bit. Now, if this was a sauna I’d say, pull out and let me take a minute to breathe, but in a cruising area? No way. I just breathe while he’s fucking me, facing out from the railings. I love this. He’s keeping an eye out, while I’m one hand gripped on a low-lying tree branch, and the other hand on the floor. Practically on all fours taking his cock like an animal. He starts tog rip my hips and thrust a bit. This is good: he might be close, and my breathing has loosened everything so that I’m enjoying the fuck. I pray the silent prayer of cumsluts everywhere: cum in me cum in me cum in me 😉 Sure enough after about five minutes, the thrusting becomes urgent and he releases a massive load into me. I grip his ass behind me for a bit to ensure he’s fucking the load into me, and then he’s done. Another one who just zips up and walks away, but not before I say thanks. “You’re welcome,” he replies. As it should be. I grab my bike and call it a day. A good day. I ride home on a wave of jizzjoy, riding no-handed, hands behind my head, smiling and feeling FUCKING GOOD!

I think the title of this thread is actually a kind of teachable idea for anyone who is thinking of starting to bareback: "NEED to bareback - neg SCARED of becoming poz" This really is it for me: NEED vs SCARED. That balance between an intense sexual desire and fantasy that's drawing itself into your reality, versus the fear of consequences, and in particular, becoming HIV-positive. Now for me, I'm a chaser, so becoming Poz would be (pun intended) a positive outcome for me, but that's simply not the case for the majority of barebackers. But I completely connect with this idea of NEED. When I started barebacking as a btm in 2012, it had gotten to the point of being a NEED: I needed a total stranger - or multiple strangers - to fuck and cum in me, and in the end, what it took for me to get over being SCARED was a few drinks and a random hookup in the toilets of a London Soho bar. Hardly the most stylish way to do it maybe, but it got me past my SCARED. It got me to tip my scales towards that NEED. And I won't say that I wasn't still scared afterwards, but yeah there was full acceptance that I had done it. I was still scared of becoming poz in those days, but I didn't freak out and go: oh shit, get me on PEP right now! I accepted the consequences of my actions. And it turns out, the major consequences of my actions on that drunken night were to want it more. I didn;t get HIV from that one fuck, because actually getting HIV is something of a challenge, a roulette: I know - I've been trying! In the years 2013-18, my rule was to let the top decide about condoms, and more than 50% of the time, I was fucked bare. This practice - to take the decision out of my own hands and submit to the top's will - was perfectly authentic for me as a btm sub, and tipped the scales so completely that only NEED remained. That need to have men cum inside me, as much as possible. These days I'm addicted, and weirdly proud of that, but you certainly don't have to go as far as I have done in this NEED/SCARED equation. But I digress (hey there ADHD! 🤣) - the point is that your decision to start barebacking will always play upon these dynamics of NEED vs SCARED. These days, you can tip the scales a bit more safely with Prep, but I say that living in a country with free healthcare. That's not the case in the US, and other countries. In the end, my own advice, based on my experience would be to JUST DO IT. That NEED isn't going to go away, and there are lots of things you can do - Prep, find a trusted partner, etc - to lower the risk so that SCARED isn't going to feel so intense. The chances of getting HIV from just one fuck are pretty low, and virtually zero if you go on Prep. If you can't get it out of your head, then it's just going to become a pathological situation, intensifying in the background to such an extent that when you do eventually do it, it'll be a wild desperate set of risks you take, because the NEED will have grown into a mountain, but so will the SCARED. Start now, when that NEED is less rampant and pathological, and you are able to be a lot more mindful about these two dynamics. Unexpressed desires often barrel into psychological issues, and really the only two paths ahead are either expression or eradication. Fear will not be a great teacher, and will not assist in either of these: if you cannot mindfully let it go - truly let it go completely, with a smile and a relaxed breath - then you'll have to express. But true eradication is hard, and is often only partially completed. That NEED comes barrelling back. So my advice: Express the NEED in your sexuality, and take the steps you have to do in order to reduce that SCARED. Prep is a good first step for someone like you I think. Good luck, hope you are able to find the right balance between that NEED and that equally valid SCARED, and do what feels right for you ❤️

Daily, at a minimum. I wake up horny almost every day, and spend a bit of time jacking off, edging myself for about half an hour. If I go to the gym - which is most days - then I might jack fof for a bit for about ten minutes before I leave, just to get the fire and the energy up. I often jack off when I get home from the gym, and if I'm gonna let myself cum, then it might be at this point. But often I just edge for a bit, and then jump on Grindr for the evening to see who's about. Last thing at night I often jack off too. If I've got myself locked in a chastity device, then all of the above will be with a 'Bum Bullet' dildo instead, and obviously I won't cum after the gym. With no chastity device, I'll let myself cum about once every three to four days, but even then, I'm pretty much back, hard and horny within the hour.

Fuck. I just saw this. I am away this weekend, otherwise I would offer my ass to you like a shot. God damn it. Enjoy, man. Please let me know if you are ever over this way again.

It's odd isn't it? In Basement on a Sunday, there's not one or two guys getting all the attention, it's just that everyone's bouncing around everyone. it's really unfocussed: I'll fuck this guy for as bit then move on. One Sunday I came out with 10 loads, the next Sunday 5. But on a Saturday, people are definitely more focussed, and simultaneously, chilled. Glad you enjoy them. Love writing them. Gets me hard recounting them... ...well it would do this time, but I just bought a new chastity device, and I'm wearing it right now. Breaking it in. Enjoying the delicious rightness of being locked up again. Fuck yeah! 😉

Yet another trip to Basement sauna in Manchester, this time on a Saturday. Now Saturday afternoons will have less than a quarter of the crowd on a Sunday, but it’s simultaneously more chilled and more focussed. Crazily I walked out of there with more loads (8 in ass, 2 in mouth) from 50 guys max being there than I did with 250+ guys who were there last Sunday. Once again, a Backroom sort of meeting was arranged with a Backroom sort of guy, who flaked. Nothing I can say here, or anywhere, because yet again, nothing happened. This is practically becoming an obligatory thing to say in my Basement ‘Your Last Load’ stories. FFS and all that. Anyway, some highlights… First Load: As ever, I’ve got to neutralise my goddamn ‘top vibes’ that I apparently give off to publicise the fact I’m a total bottom. A guy in the main video area was happy to oblige, railed me good and hard on one of the mats as guys walked by from one cruising area to another. No one really stopped to watch, and it was early – less than an hour after the place had opened – so I thought, fine it’s gonna be just five minutes fuck and then he’ll move on. But he didn’t. After about five minutes, he started gripping my hips and it felt like he was digging in for the long term. And his cock felt like it was digging away into me. Quite sizeable and I was starting to get shudders and fuzzy ecstasies as he was hitting all the right spots. P spots and such. One guy did come and watch, walked up to me and started banging his cock on the top of my head for a suck, but I really was head down and focussed on the depth of this fuck. Sorry, man. I should’ve looked up and accepted a throat fuck. But my whole body was going blurry, just from the first fuck of the day. Then without warning, a gasp and howl and I felt my digging top cum hard inside me. I was in fucking heaven. Above aforementioned backroom person was meant to rock up at 2pm. It was before 1 and I already had a load in my ass, and I knew the jizzjoy would put me in the perfect frame of mind. I was flying, as always. Fuck yeah. Thank you thank you thank you: Seems I have developed a new little thing during sex, which is to thank the guy repeatedly while he cums in me. Not after, but during. First noticed this when I got chatting to a guy who’d just arrived, started fucking me in a cubicle as a warm-up, then we broke off as he was gonna hit the dark rooms. I spent an hour between 2 and 3pm hunting around for the guy who never showed, then decided to hit the dark room myself. Must have been perfect timing: wasn’t that crowded, but a succession of guys were coming in and out. Within seconds, I had hands on me, and a cock went inside for a jackhammer fuck. I love these: you know it doesn’t feel that ecstatic, and you’re braced with your legs wide, leaning against a wall… or in the case, your arms around the shoulders of someone else cos it was in the middle of the dark room floor, and this other guy seemed happy to support me. But you know: he’s jack hammering you because he just needs to cum. And yeah, three or four minutes of being hammered and he exploded into me. “Thank you thank you thank you” I gasp during his own gasping howls. He pulls out, and exits, leaving me with my supporting guy. Who has had an ulterior motive for supporting me: he wants to be next. It’d be rude not to allow myself to be manhandled up against the wall for pretty much more the same treatment. Bang bang bang goes the jack hammer, slam slam slam goes his hips into my ass, but this time the shivers come back and give me ecstasies… or is that a wave of jizzjoy? Whatever: another five-ish (??) minutes (I swear, time loops so differently in a dark room) of fucking and another hot blast of cum rushes into my ass. “Thank you thank you thank you” goes my desperate submissive cumdump gratitude. This one takes a bit of time to ensure his cum is safely fucked into me before pulling out and again leaving without a word. As he should. And another pair of hands take me, in similar vein up against the wall, to the same conclusion: “Thank you thank you thank you”. A final cock slides into my ass having been directed to the fuck bench at the back of the dark room. And again: “thank you thank you thank you” Four loads in quick succession… in what, twenty minutes maybe? Apparently I Have Seductive Eyes: Towards the end of my sauna trip, I get a bit of feedback from someone about exactly what those top vibes I’m allegedly constantly giving off actually are. I’m tall, I’ve got tattoos, I roll my shoulders and I kinda take up a bit more space with my movements and my body than a sub btm should. Ok, that last one is probably the ADHD. “But”, says the guy who tells me this in the corridor, “It’s your eyes. They’re really sexy and seductive.” I get a lot of compliments about my eyes. They’re big, hazel and with long girly lashes. It’s noticeable for some reason, and yeah I’m not shy about using them 😉 It’s the way he says this last sentence though… like a bit of a blur. Like he’s caught in the seduction a bit. So I switch it up, gaze into him and tilt my head with a half-smile like some kind of animal. Give him a wink and he gives a bit of a gasp. I glide him into the cubicle with whatever seduction he perceives me to have. If I’m half pretending to be Dom here, I’m also using my eyes to get him to lay me down on the mat, making sure my eyes are fully visible in the low light. “Fuck me,” It’s practically a command. I successfully hide both my own surprise and amusement, but I don’t let him out of my gaze. I am visualizing headlights, beams flying out of my eyes to fix him. We fuck. It’s not a bad fuck, and he does shoot a couple of mini-cumshots into me – “sorry I’ve come about three times already today” – but it’s that eyes locked together moment that’s memorable. I’m on my back, legs in the air, he’s over me and pounding away… but he’s given me all the power and it’s completely through my eyes. If I look away the spell will break. Eventually it does break, and we part. But every time afterwards when we pass in the corridor, I make sure to playfully give him a bit of the eye beaming right at him. It’s a strange thing, pretty much all in his head, but I am happy to play it for his thrill. After this, one last dark room trip for a couple more loads, and then time to make my exit. All in all, another good trip! *** Oh I almost forgot: I got chatting to some guy who wanted to fuck me, but with a condom - "I only fuck safe, sorry" to my "I only get fucked bare man, sorry" - so that wasn't going to happen. Anyway, I lied and told him I was poz, just to see his reaction. I’m not quite sure why I did it. It was interesting to see his mental gears clashing - must not stigmatise, but also must make my exit. Not to go all Backroom on this moment, but it was nice to experience that...

I used to have a friend who was an organist for a prominent Anglican church in London. He said the clergy was chock full of gay men, and the congregation was an equal mix of elderly locals, music lovers who came to hear him play - he was a talented organist and the organ itself was remarkable (puns probably intended! 🤣) - and gay men on the cruise. He invited me to listen one time, and I was successful in both enjoying the music and cruising a couple who took me off to the toilets in the park behind the church to fuck and breed me, in a double act which if I am honest is the closest I ever come to praying. That was a happy Sunday! My friend also knew all the gossip about the gay clergy. He used to tell a story about the Bishop of [ Diocese Redacted! 🤣 ] who went to the doctor complaining of a problem with his rectum, saying "I've got soreness and a rash right at the entrance here", to which the doctor replied: "Your Grace, most people refer to it as the exit!" 🤣 He also had a gay-married Canandian clergy couple as neighbours for a while. Never told my friend this but while he was out of his apartment one hot summer day, I went over shirtless, knocked on the door "just to say hi" to be answered by the older one who invited me in, told me his husband was out (which I already knew). Apparently my reptutation had preceded me. We did it in the kitchen. I never told my friend about it, to this day. That was also a happy Sunday!

I think if you let me know beforehand about the colour, it would be get me intensely curious, and I'd want to experience it. To be honest I would probably find it horny, thrilling and laugh-out-loud absurd in equal measure, but it wouldn't stop me bathing myself in it, or opening my throat to drink it down. But you'd have to also know that I'd definitely take it away as a story to recount later: "guys, let me tell ya the time I met a guy whose piss was blue..." 🤣

My official load tally this year is 42 in my ass that I know of. Didn't count loads down my throat but it's about 20ish I think. Definitely been fucked by 100+ guys and prob close to 200, mostly in saunas so top guys float around from btm to btm. Pretty good for me, given I only got about 90ish loads in my ass last year in total. My goal was to get 100 loads in my ass this year - it's only March and I'm already within shooting distance of halfway. I'm on track for sure. I don't live in a big city - small town not far from two cities - so always have to travel for saunas or cruising, and Grindr/Scruff hookups are usually travel too. But I'm always willing to do that work!

The way I see it, I am on my knees before this man – a naturally submissive position – working my hardest to use my mouth and throat to bring him pleasure, and make him cum. So really it’s up to him if he wants to direct me and tell me what he likes in a blowjob – if that’s the sort of guy he is – and it’s my job to respond to that. I don’t tend to use my hands when sucking cock, except to direct the cock into my mouth, or to help get it hard at the beginning. Within a few minutes, the only use for my hands will be to run them over his body for extra pleasure, or to use them to grab his hands and place them on the back of my head so he can skullfuck me with full control. I think offering my head to be skullfucked is the greatest thing I can give to a man during oral sex. But, there again, I have sucked some guys that want me to use my hands, to jack their cock into my mouth, to work not just my hands but my arm to really whack that thing off, with the head just in my open my mouth, and basically hitting myself in the mouth with the energy of it. Some guys like that. It’s really for the guy I am cocksucking to tell me what he wants, and if he is the kinda guy to give orders, it’s my job to follow them.

BB Btm in Leeds-Bradford, but in Basement sauna one or two Sundays a month, always giving my ass away to rpetty much anyone who wants to fuck me raw. Also jd13 on BBRT and Subjack on Recon. My profile on here also lists how to find me on Scruff through hashtag search. No loads refused and no prep here 😉

I have no preference whatsoever for cun or uncut. I am uncut, which is the norm here in the UK, but I have sucked my fair share of both. To me, the question is odd, almost as if I'm being asked if I prefer cut or uncut cocks to fuck me. Why would I choose or discriminate? I love cocks of all shapes, sizes, colours, ages, flavours, and will suck pretty much any that are offered to me these days, either as a prelude to a fuck or as an end in itself. Plus, for the most part, the head of the cock is going to be spending a lot of time in my throat, so... yeah 😉

Christ I've turned this into my bloody confession time here!! 🤣🤣🤣

One of the very worst things I did was back in 2014. Was seeing this fuck buddy who I knew was cheating on his bf. Didn't care, neither did he. He used to fuck me on the bed he shared with his bf. We'd meet about once every couple of weeks. Third or fourth time, he showed me a picture of his bf. Fatal mistake: I didn't let on but I knew him socially. Next time I saw the bf out drinking, I put the moves on him. Long story short, he ended fucking me in the very same apartment - but not in the bedroom - that I had been visiting for weeks. I had both of their numbers on my phone and started meeting both of them - guy #1 at the apartment and the bf (guy #2) would come to fuck me outdoors near me - semi-regularly. This went on for two months. Fairly abruptly, they both broke off contact and I got the sense both had blocked me. I decided not to go to that particular bar for a while. Three or four months after that, I started to go back there and I heard that they had broken up. About a year after they broke off contact, some random guy came up to me in the same bar, told me he was guy#2/the bf's best friend, and then punched me off my chair 🤣 Best punch i ever fucking took. Right in the face. Deserved it and more. Guess they had figured it out after all! I really really shouldn't have done it but... y'know *shrugs* 🤣

You're right. That is exactly Doctorow's definition of 'enshittification' right there, in the experience you report. I may have been overly optimistic in saying 'three to five years'

I definitely got this from felching cummy holes on Sunday in the sauna! 🤣

True enough. I'm fine with STIs turning up, especially given my sexual behaviour. But strep throat? Ick, please no, not again! 🤣

I just bought a new chastity device, a Cobra Resin Cock Cage. Tried wearing a plastic one - can't remember the brand, but supposedly good - a couple of years ago, but it broke while I was on a run. God knows how - I'm not that well endowed! So I bought a metal cock cage and it was too big. Abandoned the whole project til recently, when I was speaking to a foot-and-chastity Dom on Grindr. So, we try again. Have made a list of dares and goals: go cruising while locked up, go to a sauna bathhouse locked up and collared. Want to put myself in training so I can participate in this year's Locktober. It arrives tomorrow. Can't wait.