RideMyBlkDik

I am amazed how you could let misterpiggy's post get under your skin. Do we need to remind ourselves that this is the internet where people will write about facts or fiction without censorship? You talk about misterpiggy shooting down your points. In turn you go out because you "don't feel the need to always be right and win. Well based on your reaction, apparently you do feel the need to win. Always. In your own word, "I'm out". Just leave when people don't share your views.

Sorry to be the spoiler in this thread.... Having communicated with Mr Marky personally, and getting to know him, it changed my views. His addiction to drugs is so chronic that many studios cannot work with him. That's why he is not the superstar that he should be. That's why he is not in many many more videos. He is one of 2 porn stars who I know personally whose drug addiction has really hampered his ability to get work in gay porn. I used to communicate with Mr. Marky quite often when I attempted to hire him as an escort. He lived in Detroit and for him to come to me in New Jersey we had to figure out a way for him to feed his drug addiction while he was on his journey to New Jersey. And then to feed the addiction for as long as he would spend with me. It was just too stressful trying to figure that out. Of course he is versatile so he had agreed to bottom and be bred as an escort. Nevertheless I really do like watching his videos. But like many porn stars, the fantasy of being with them trumps the reality of actually being in bed with them.

In my opinion a loose hole is disgusting. When my cock falls seamlessly into a hole it freaks me out. A loose hole feels unnatural to me. I want to breed a natural ass not fall into a sinkhole. Like NLbear said, please let me feel like I'm the first person to fuck you that day. Similarly in a bathhouse, if I put my finger in your hole and it has been pre-lubed, then I don't wanna have anything to do with you...because I don't know how many guys have fucked you before or if you are so thirsty to be lubed in advance of, you know what. That's just the short version of how I really feel about this topic.

As a black man I have very little interest in white guys. At a subconscious level I often wonder about the intent of white guys and my own motivation. The history of whites dominating blacks during slavery looms large in my mind. And I cannot brush aside the fact that racism is very real here in the USA. Of course what goes on in our minds is important. Very important. So we have the physical attributes of sex and the mental attributes of sex. In other words, for me, it's a question of what's driving the desire to be with someone, anyone, sexually. For me, the mental drives the physical. I might find you physically attractive but mentally I have too many roadblocks to even get an erection for you. Basically these thoughts are not just my own...these are the private thoughts that my black friends and I share when the topic of sex with white guys comes up. Oftentimes, in private, blacks refer to the 'Mandingo' syndrome (means whites are only chasing blacks for their big black cocks) or blacks talk about 'jungle fever' (means the strong urge for either blacks or whites to perpetuate interracial love affairs). Having said all of the above, I find some white guys incredibly sexy. If as a white guy you think that riding my black cock is taboo then just know that you are perfectly normal. So many things in our society are divided along racial lines. Yes, even sex. Some whites prefer only to have sex with whites. Some blacks prefer only to have sex with blacks. In gay porn, there was a documentary on national TV recently about white porn stars who flat out refuse to work with black porn stars. A white bareback porn star whose work I have always admired said it's a real problem in gay porn today. He stated that he will not breed or be bred by a black guy, not on camera and certainly not off camera. And his producers side with him so that he is never paired with black guys. We have the freedom to choose. We all of our own preferences and desires.

Thank you for helping me to understand this topic. Your response was very sincere and caused me to rethink my own personal beliefs. I really want to thank you for sharing your ideas and your personal experiences.

I like your point of view Nay80. I wish more bottoms were like you. But I must accept that everyone is not the same. And I understand that we are all at different levels of awareness. We won't always agree on the same things in life but I have learned to respect each person's opinions and feelings. That's what makes democracy work in this great country, the USA.

You are so right cam1972. Like you I'm disgusted with the lack of education in the gay community. This shortcoming in the gay community makes this topic relevant.

Deciding to bareback is NOT a gradual journey. It's the final frontier. Barebacking is not for kids. We are all adults here. And adults should know that actions have consequences. Like misterpiggy said earlier, fucking bare and breeding go hand in hand. I think nelliess missed that memo. What do you think?

Could it be that tops are ignoring bottoms who say "don't cum inside me"? It happened to me last night. Again. I was topping this dude with a very tight hole and just as I was about to bust inside him he said.... I ignored him. Totally. I unloaded a bucket full of cum inside his fuck hole. Simply because I thought he was being ridiculous. Am I wrong to think and feel the way I do?

You are spot on with that response. Thank you.

Can we agree to disagree here? Hell no, you are not selfish! SirPhilippe, you like what you like and don't apologize for being who you are. You wanted to know the casual gay guy's opinion. Therein lies the problem of the parameter used to set up your question. There is no cookie-cutter approach to define a casual gay guy. Let's not forget, gay guys are still human beings. Humans run the gamut in their wants, needs, emotions, sexual interests, etc., etc. Definitions and labels are tricky...a casual gay guy by definition will compartmentalize a gay man. Then our brain figures that it is easier to understand someone we have compartmentalized. (It's like thinking all Muslims are potential terrorists: our brain tend to want to make that connection understandable). Unfortunately gay men, as humans, cannot be put into neat little boxes to be understood by the world at large. We come in beaucoup varieties. We are tops, bottoms, verse, black, white, physicians, laborers, rich, poor, European, Asian, African, athletes,...you name it. Please embrace who you are and love every minute of it. As long as your rights and lifestyle does not harm or infringe on the lives others; just go for it SirPhillipe. If and when you do decide to settle down, just continue to be true to yourself and your match will definitely gravitate to you. The world is an awesome place because we are not all the same.

This thread has become a learning experience for me. Everyone has something to contribute here. It's good to know what's going on inside each person's head (whether you're top, bottom, or verse). Being a top, I agree with those who say that whenever a bottom agrees to the top's cock bare but doesn't want the top to unload inside him (for fear of STD's), then the bottom is really being a complete idiot. I agree with that. However let me say 2 things: 1) I am glad this discussion did not veer off into the need to educate men about just how lethal precum can be.....It's just as toxic as cum. We really don't need to branch off into that discussion in this thread.....simply because there will ALWAYS be men who want a bare cock inside them but do not want the top to unload inside them (for whatever reason). If the bottom is ignorant about how STD'S are transmitted, then tops like myself will just have to deal with that level of ignorance. 2) Generally speaking bottoms are really kool people. Very kool. I have never had a serious backlash from any guy whom I have nutted inside after he specifically asked me not to cum inside him. Never. Men react to fucking and breeding quite different than females do. (I have fucked and bred both men and women). Women tend to get so emotionally attached!! Damn!...yeah I'm a sexist. On the other hand when a man breeds another man, the bottom chalks it up as par for the course....even if the bottom asked the top not to cum inside him. About 2 years ago I had a first time anonymous encounter with a guy I fucked raw in Harlem. We fucked raw all night. I must have nutted in him at least 3 or 4 times. The following morning he wanted me to assure him that I hadn't nutt inside him. From the look on my face, he knew I did. He then swore that he would never allow me to fuck him raw again if I wasn't willing to pull out before I unloaded. He was very adamant about it. Well a few months later I unloaded inside him again. Now he looks forward to my loads.

I took your advice. I applied for and received the Gilead copay card. Yesterday I went to the pharmacy to refill my prescription for Truvada. But this time I had the copay assistance card. My cost was zero. I was happy beyond belief. Thanks to you and all the guys in this thread. I really can't thank you enough.

Bottoming is more of an art than it is a science. I have always admired men who can take cock after cock like a true pro. As a total top, I know that's not for me. I have never bottomed and I have absolutely no interest in bottoming. None whatsoever. More power to the bottoms who feel the need to cross over and breed a hole from time to time. In my opinion, true total bottoms are usually pathetic when they try to top. And true total tops usually look and sound ridiculous when they try to bottom. On the other hand, there are a few men who are definitely totally versatile and I applaud them as well. But again, I do have the most respect for men who are true total bottoms and for whom all cocks and loads are welcomed. In short, whether you are a quarterback or a wide receiver, STAY IN YOUR LANE!!

Based on the discussion in this thread so far, here is my principal view: political correctness has no place between two men having bareback sex. The dynamics between two men fucking raw is quite different in contrast to sex between a male and a female. I believe that distinction must be made in this conversation because mentally, men are wired differently from women...just ask Dr. John Gray (Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus). This doesn't mean that a man's need for anal sex cannot be as strong as a woman's need for vaginal sex. But what it does mean is that when two men come together to fuck, raw, their animalistic behavior is in high gear. Translation: let's fuck like dogs! Having said that, it is never a good time for a bottom to agree to bareback with the caveat that the top should not cum inside him. The bottom should not stipulate that condition before the sex and certainly not during the sex. That's my personal opinion. As a top, when a bottom agrees to bareback, he should know that I intend to make a deposit. If you don't want my deposit then stay the fuck away from my raw dick.

Just last night it happened to me again. About 20 minutes in fucking this guy raw at a sex party in Brooklyn, he and I knew I was about to bust my nutt. At that point he turned his head and said "don't cum inside me". I went through a wide range of thoughts and emotions. For a brief moment, him saying that interrupted my rhythm (especially since he was fine as fuck with the kind of booty I dream about). Soon enough I regained my momentum and was fucking like I was going to impregnate him with my babies. His ass fit my dick like a glove! I was loving every stoke as I fucked him doggy style. This time I was going to have a volcanic eruption inside his fuck-hole. I couldn't hold back. The ass was too good not to breed it...after all, isn't that what tops are supposed to do? So I started to shoot my nutt like a bull inside this dude...and he turned around and repeated "don't cum inside me". This wasn't a stealth-like kind of breeding...because nutt wasn't just oozing gently out my dick; I was shooting nutt like I was gonna be the first man to make another man pregnant. Suddenly he managed to pull himself so swiftly away from me (in such a manner that I was still shooting nutt at that time) and he forcibly caused my dick to exit his fuck-hole. I learned a valuable lesson last night: whenever a guy says "don't cum inside me", it throws a monkey wrench into the breeding process.

This topic is very uncomfortable for me. Because it forces me to step back and evaluate my sex life. During the 80's my sex life was pretty much dormant as far as intercourse is concern. The AIDS crisis dominated the news and my thought process. In the early to mid 90's I tried to lead a straight lifestyle....so I did 'bareback', but only with a few females. In the late 90's I got married to a female and that shut down my sexual activities with men. Then after my divorce in 2001 the floodgates opened up. Not just to release all my decades old pent up sexual desires but also to truly live out my fantasies about skin to skin fucking with men. So since about 2001 or 2002 I have been a hardcore-dedicated-unapologetic barebacker. In a real sense I'm having to make up for all the time I lost in the 80's and 90's. So in a certain sense this topic is moot to me. I'm too busy catching up on lost time. For so many decades I didn't have sex with men in the most natural and most enjoyable way, bareback. By default I am a barebacker.

Thanks guys. Today I signed up for the Gilead co-pay card. Like me, you can be sure that there are other men out there who do not know that there's co-pay assistance offered by Gilead. What about HIV+ patients who are on a fixed budget and who believe they can't afford Gilead's other drugs (even though co-pay assistance is available for those Gilead drugs as well)? Lack of the information in this thread could be a life and death decision for some patients. Thanks again guys.

I live in the NY/NJ area and my insurance plan is fairly decent. With my insurance plan, I pay $140 for 30 tablets (that's a 30-day supply of Truvada). That comes to $4.67 per tablet. Without my insurance, the pharmacist tells me (and he put the without-insurance cost in writing for me) it would cost me $1,260 for the 30 tablets. That comes to $42 per tablet. So with my insurance plan, purchasing Truvada as a pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) I am saving about $37.33 per tablet. Are my numbers in line with what you are paying for the tablets? Are you paying less or more than I am? And I wonder if the costs vary based on where you live. I have no idea if I am paying too much or too little. For me, $140 every 30 days is not cheap. Maybe I can get it cheaper elsewhere. Please share...

It is true that some bottoms are aware of the STD risks of precum. But equally true, there are bottoms who are fully aware but they tell the top not to cum inside them....for other reasons. For example a bottom told me this past summer that he uses the line ("don't come inside me") as a weapon to keep tops from thinking he's too "easy". And I recall once hearing a bottom say he uses the line because he wants all tops to know that cumming inside him is a privilege not a right!.....that way the bottom maintains some level of control over the dominance of the top. But my feeling is that there's never a good reason to tell a top to pull out.....not before and not during the fuck session. And bottoms, please don't expect be to negotiate (beg). Please don't expect me to educate you about precumming. That's not gonna happen....especially when my dick is rock hard and throbbing for your hole. That's no time to negotiate. That's no time to educate.

OK. How many times have you heard that expression? And have you ever told a top that he can fuck you raw but "don't cum inside me." Since I am a total top who is into breeding holes raw, I find that expression offensive. Recently I met a hot guy in DC who agreed to let me top him bareback. But we went back and forth because he thought I was crazy to want to nutt inside his ass. Finally he said I could bust my nutt inside him "only if I can show him papers to prove that I am HIV negative". At that point my dick went from rock hard to JELL-O limp. Yes, I was upset. Has a bottom ever stipulated that you pull out before you bust your nutt? And when you bottom, have you ever asked a top not to cum inside you? Why? Years ago my neighbor got pregnant even though both she and her boyfriend swear that he had never put his penis inside her vagina. However he had rubbed his raw dick against her raw vagina many a times. Her doctor informed her that his pre-cum inadvertently got inside her. Enough to make her pregnant. She was highly disappointed. So guys...when you agree to bareback, remember tops can be pre-cumming inside your hole while he's fucking you...So please don't play with my emotions. It gets even worse if I am fucking raw (and really getting my groove on) and just when I am about to get my nutt inside dat hole, the bottom at that point says, "don't cum inside me"!!! WHAT DA FUCK!!! Why would bottoms want to fuck with a top's head like that? Maybe I am getting all bent out of shape over that expression. For a Top like myself, cumming inside dat hole is just icing in the cake. Just don't bareback if pulling out is an option. Pulling out is not an option for me. Am I wrong to think and feel the way I do? Pre-cum can be just as potent as cum.

I am a total strict 100% Top. I have NEVER bottomed in my entire life. I have been aggressively barebacking for over the past 12 years. I fuck raw 99% of the time. I fuck raw indiscriminately at bathhouses and saunas, and at raw sex parties all over NYC. The number of guys I have fucked raw are just too many to even start counting. I always test negative for HIV. Today I am HIV negative. Honestly, that's the truth about my sex life. Having said that, I recently heard a statistic from a healthcare professional in Atlanta. He said the odds of catching HIV if you are a barebacking bottom are approximately 1:30. And the odds of catching HIV if you are a barebacking top are approximately 1:300. I really have no way of verifying those statistics. But those statistics sound kind of plausible to me. What do you guys think? In any event, throughout the years I have always been told by multiple healthcare professionals that in general it is not easy for anybody to become HIV positive.

I had a similar experience but with a slight twist. I asked my urologist to put me on PrEP an he didn't know what I was talking about. (I went to see him when I contracted gonorrhea for the very first time). He was really in left field because he wanted to know which female gave me gonorrhea and apparently he just doesn't treat HIV patients. He is a specialist in both urology and oncology and I assumed that somewhere his his education he had crossed paths with infectious diseases live HIV. I guess it's kinda like the same way he assumes I am a straight black male. So I concluded that I was getting nowhere with my urologist. But I needed to find answers elsewhere. Quickly. Last month I began my own search to find a physician or a clinic, any physician or clinic, in order to get HIV-tested... and if I tested negative, I was hoping to get on PrEP. Here's the twist, I started making phone calls on a Friday evening all over New Jersey and New York to get tested for HIV. I literally called dozens of locations. I could not find anywhere that would test me for HIV. Right through to Saturday, the next day, all the places I called either sent me to voicemail or told me I could come in to do the test on a week day during hours when I am generally at my job. I was in a general state of disbelief. I was totally exasperated!! How could I be having difficulty in finding a place to test me for HIV? Getting on PrEP was the ultimate goal, but first I wanted to be sure I was HIV negative... Before giving up, I called a friend who has been HIV positive for many years now and I asked him where to go for a test. He contacted his friend on Facebook who told him I should go to IRIS House in Plainfield, NJ or to IRIS House in Harlem, New York. I called both locations and got voicemail. I left messages on both. The following Monday morning, I got a call from the New Jersey office. They agreed to set up an appointment for me at the Harlem office of IRIS House that same evening. I kept my appointment. And to make a long story short, I was put on a fast track to see a physician who has devoted her many years of practice to treating HIV/AIDS patients. Thanks to her, today I am on PrEP. Here are the 2 biggest lessons I learned from my experience: 1. HIV and AIDS are no longer considered a death sentence like it was in the 80's and 90's when it ravaged the gay community. 2. HIV and AIDS are now in the same column as Tuberculosis (TB) and Diabetes...as long as you take your meds you will live a long, normal, and productive life. (Thanks to the great strides made in modern medicine). The urgency to deal with HIV and AIDS just doesn't exist anymore.

I am thankful for all the responses so far. In particular HereInLondon, I thank you for your honesty and candid views on the topic. Just a note, I have 2 friends (who do not know each other) who are both HIV positive and I tried to have this discussion about STD's with them and here's what they told me: Friend number one, who is a total bottom and who cannot get enough loads in his hole, informed me that he has NEVER had any STD's in his entire life (except for HIV). I do know for a fact that he takes multiple anonymous loads all the time. He sometimes advertises online inviting all tops to his pump and dump parties where he's the only bottom. Yeah, he has an insatiable need to get lots of strangers' cum inside him (both orally and anally). I do not believe that he has any reason at all to lie to me. He's 38 years old. I have known him for several years and never caught him in a lie. Could he possibly be telling me the truth? I guess anything is possible. Friend number 2 is currently an escort in New York City. He is a total strict top and a former bareback porn star. I reached out to him when I got my first diagnosis of gonorrhea. I wanted to know if he could relate and give me some advice....especially since he frequents raw sex parties and bathhouses like I do. It was then, for the first time, he told me that he is HIV positive. More importantly he told me then that he doesn't contract any other STD's because of the medication he takes for HIV. Yes, he said his HIV medication prevents him from contracting any other STD's. Just like Friend # 1, this Friend #2 has absolutely no reason to lie to me. However, a little over a week ago, I asked a doctor who treats lots of HIV patients in NYC if HIV medication can prevent men from contracting other STD's....and she said that's absolutely impossible. So based on the ambivalent and confusing information I was getting, I came here, to this web site; hoping to get some clarity. Hoping that I can learn from the experiences of others. If as gay men, we were silent about HIV and AIDS as it ravaged the gay community in the 80's and 90's, then I honestly don't believe we would be enjoying the rapid advances of medical science in treating the disease...to the extent where today a diagnosis of HIV is no longer a death sentence. That's just my opinion. By the same token, I honestly believe that our silence about gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, etc. will do us more harm than good in the long run. Progress can start when we are willing to share our own personal experiences in a forum like this. Here we can separate facts from fiction. Here we can learn from each other. I would like to think of this web site as a judgement-free zone for gay barebackers like myself. Discussion about STD's (other than HIV) is at worst a taboo topic; and at the very least the topic is uncomfortable for gay men to face fearlessly. Again, I am thankful for all who have shared so far.

At best the 4 replies so far have been tepid. Am I to believe that only 4 members and myself have had STD's other than HIV? Why do gay men find it so hard to talk about this topic? Gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia rates are on the rise, so says the CDC. I raised the topic and shared my personal experience of contracting gonorrhea twice in the past 12 months because I need help. And I need help in understanding the following: Gonorrhea significantly slowed down my sex life (because by the time I knew something was wrong, got to the clinic, took the medication for so many days, then waited more days after fully taking all the pills; about 4 to 5 weeks went by where I did not have any sex)...so how has any STD slowed down your sex life? Have you ever continued barebacking when you knew you were infected with an STD? How often have you had any STD's? (Like I said, I contracted gonorrhea twice in the past 12 months) Do you or can you do anything to minimize your chances of contracting STD's? More and more I am convinced that STD's other than HIV is a taboo subject for many gay men. Gay men would rather talk about HIV and AIDS but are silent when it comes to their personal experiences with Syphilis, Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, etc. Why is this such a forbidden topic?