Sharp-edge

I'm trying to decipher this behavior (of not actually meeting). Many people seem to be busy. Or act like it. Some people connect and they may say oh you know what I'm not logging in frequently. So I'm like what are you doing here then? Some other people say "I'm not looking for something". But come on you're in a dating app how can you be here without wanting something? And then we have the guys that are too hasty. They want u to go for a coffee right now. Sorry but I can't drink coffee or other beverages with someone because I just like his one profile photo. I need a little more contact than that. I'm not afraid to "invest" some of my time. Sometimes I think that maybe a majority of gays are having unrealistic expectations. That is why they are not interested too meet in real like. They wait for a prince or something. When I met my guy it was in real life without using an app. I had not seen him naked before I actually get him unrdressed. If I could magically change two parameters in the game called love, I would a) increase the percentage of gays (at least three times) and either make gays have realistic standards or make gays extraordinary lovable. When a gay guy loves another guy he has to overcome many obstacles. Is he gay too? Is he sexually what he needs? We end up in small numbers, especially in the countryside. Instagram has made us a global village with hot men sharing their fake life. And some people got stuck in that. For me love is simple. It takes a glance. When your eyes meets his the rest are on their way. Like a chemical reaction. All we need is bring the two reactants into a reasonable distance.

I regret to admit that it feels you are right. Was it always like that? I have the feeling that everybody talks about money. I see tens of stupid IG profiles about how a stupid almost sexy guy now has a laborgini and is somewhere in Dubai and wants to share that advice. Everybody wanting to be a dermatologist (among medical students) because of well.. money. Everything revolves around money. I'm not rich but come on there are other things in life to crave. I always liked to chat with older guys in my first days of the internet. These guys could hold great conversations. And I'm not talking about have me fall for them. You could even make friends. Now it feels like talking to a half-finished AI-based creature.

You are 100% right. However I'm a millenial and I don't like all these. What I enjoy is flirting with someone that it happened to meet him outside. My best friend keeps on sending me IG posts of hot guys that he thinks I would like. He is right these guys are hot for me BUT I'm not interested for every random ginger dude out there. I know that there are many hot guys out there in the globe. But these are almost "Fake". Egocentric, egomaniac people that they are half porn starlets and half influences. I'm sick of that.

In Greece's planetromeo spamers are the norm. How to identify them? Hot masculine dudes who are passive with a new profile.

I'm posting also this link for a related article but you can find many others of this topic ([think before following links] https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2023-08-03/young-adults-less-sex-gen-z-millennials-generations-parents-grandparents) As a millenial myself I recognise this. You can find porn everywhere and sometimes jerking can be way easier. Nobody seems to care meeting people. Some are what I call sex zombies. They want you to meet them right this instant. No matter if it's snowing, if it's 3am, if you tell them you're dying no they don't care. You have to meet them. And when you do they already search for the next one the moment you walk away. But many others are just unavailable. Instagram is full of half naked half-unclosetted gays who don't actually do something. Many of them also have Twitter where they just show their body and genitals and many also have onlyfans. Whoever has a dick sees it as a means of making money I'm afraid. The only type of people that I think are relatively easy to meet are those who like to bate with someone else.

I always thought I had a tendency of being horny. As a person who tends to overthink, I started to overthink about it. I discovered that it's not the desire for sex that drives my lust. I'm not even sure if lust or the feeling of being horny is my driving force. I always appreciate the male body and a guy in general. His hair, his smile, his body everything can be a tiny trigger for me. But the biggest trigger it turns that it's something different. It's what I feel when a guy that I find sexy smiles at me. It's overflowing. And at the end of the day, we search for thinks that make us feel good. Some times these things are not good for us. We may abuse food just for a small dopamine rush that lusts for minutes and eventually developing bad habits. And maybe the same goes with sex. We feel that rush but we do not feel saturated. We need more and more. There's a guy that I like. I like him quite a lot. I don't even know if he's gay or even if he is, if he likes me. It doesn't matter. Today, after I was not around for 2 days he sent that he missed me, he touched my shoulder and smiled at me. I reflect that moment and I smile like a fool. This pleasure lusts way longer for me than a random hook up, than a silly comfort food snack or anything else. I think everybody needs moments like this. It doesn't have to be anything special, nowhere specia. Just a smile. A touch. It can work wonders.

I think people are prone to have faith in something. That's why they eventually believe things that make no sense to some other people but they are true for them. I'm sure there is an evolutionary reason behind this.

When I started dating planetromeo (gayromeo back then) was the basic website (in my country at least) for that. I was never a frequent visitor there. I would make a profile but delete soon because I felt it was useless. Now (in my place again) this places feels a bit abandoned. People younger than 30 are quite rate and older people are more common but it's the type of profilers with photos back from 2005. Maybe people are using other apps? Or just instagram? Or do they find their partners, hook ups or whatever outside? Or maybe nobody wants to meet nobody? PS You now how to be a plus member to find people beyond a certain distance or to search for particular characteristics (like fisting or anything else).

that would be Zeus, but he's really okay with sex (joking) I can't believe that this amazing guy has been through all this, for literally no reason. I'm sure he would have loved and been loved.

I have a colleague who is the sweetest person I've met. He's also very cute. It's inspiring how much he loves his patients and his job. I always thought he was kinda religious, but not too religious. I mean most Greeks do some Christian things (go to the church in some big days etc) but that is more like something we do because we've get used to. To make a long story short, after many events that I won't analyze, following a difficult shift he ended up crying in my arms. We talked and talked and he said something shocking to me. He's gay but he's not having any sex (or anything) because it's a sin. I think my brain made a soft reset when I heard that. I can't believe that a person who has studied a freaking science for 6 years, and in fact no any science but medicine, can believe such a thing. I've also got the impression that the reason of his break down is that he's into me but that's not my point. This wonderful man is tormenting himself because somebody told him that he's gonna burn in hell for all eternity? And what that sin would be? Loving someone can send you to hell? I really can't accept this, it must be april's fool or something.

No it's okay, no worries. Another thing I was thinking is that bug chasing around that I've seen in the internet. I'm not actually aware if it's just a made up scenario or some people actually mean it though. But this guy is so vulnerable and I fear he will be traumatized despite the best of our efforts not to. His viral load is high af, but this dude is just a shocked and devastated person who needs medical (physical) and emotional support. Not a sex demon that's going to breed "innocent" buttholes. Although based on the fact that he didn't know his status and that possibly he has had sex these years he may have "seeded" people (willing ones or just unaware ones) and he hasn't cum for days (although I supposed he won't be horny given all these).

So true. I don't even know if he's gay. I should discuss some things with him. I don't think he has a gf/bf because nobody came. Half my job is to make him okay from the virus part and the other half is return him back to society fully functional, not in guilt. Sex is a weird thing. Religion was the worst thing. Our gods were fucking non stop, boys, men were fucking each others, we had the so called "mysteries" that involved sex between drunk people and now the church of greece prohibits (not exactly because it has power of law but because it has power over politics) sex education at school. Even the HPV vaccine until some years ago was not prescribed in boys. You almost had to say as a boy that you're a horny gay boy that wants to take dick. I'm sorry for putting it that way, but when the indication for HPV vaccine in boys were "males of high risk" I can't think of something different I'm sorry.

I didn't know that but I'll have it in mind. It's not in english, we're Greeks so I just translated my thought.

You are right about these. He will have his meds for free which is essential. And from my part, I will do whatever possible to help him (and any other person actually). He's a young man not a boy but his mother gets in the way. We have a "joke" about greek mothers prescribing antibiotics. I'm not at all anxious about how well he's going to be. He'll be fine. I worry about how he will react to that, nothing else. About the judgmental mother that's what we're saying too. Maybe he does things "in secret" due to all of the mother's behavior who knows. The last time that we had a round (going around rooms all the doctors together seeing and discussing about managing our patients) she wouldn't leave the room. She said I wanna hear. I told her to leave and she was most displeased. I don't care of course, but she doesn't care either about leaving us do our job.

Now this is empathy no joking. Why are some people like that? You can't sugar coat that, even if you put all the world's sugar on it, I know. What I would like him to understand and I fear he won't because when the word hiv is heard bee wax fills one's ear for the rest details, is that it's okay. He will take his meds, he will be okay. He "evaded" death thanks to this diagnosis. Shouldn't he be with us he would die of a stupid-otherwise infection. But somewhere here he will start to wonder why, he may be gay, he could be str8 I don't know but guilt will start inside him. In our culture/society a mother tends to interfere. Legally you are right of course. She's so annoying, I just ask her to leave and check she's not eavesdropping. But we need more time than that, maybe he'll start crying or something I need time for him. PS We have a nurse here who says that we should put all infections together and wanted it to place him in our cozy tuberculosis room. this woman is a menace.

I didn't know it myself until quite recently, but you can't just start meds on someone with AIDS (because he was in the stage). You have first to make sure he is "clean" of any other infection and then administer, otherwise the immune system will start reacting bad to all these. so it's just for his pneumonia now, but his theatment will be okay I hope.

I'm part of a medical team and we're breaking bad news to patients quite often. It's mostly cancers though or hepatitis (usually non viral) to (typically) quite old patients. But now I have a young patient that is HIV+ positive and I feel very sad about him. His condition was rather bad, he came with an opportunistic infection (as eventually proved). We still wait the confirmatory results (but it really can't be anything else) so we haven't told him. His mother is constantly around and she's a bit bossy. We haven't tell her either because the moment she will google the disease she will find that it's an hiv thing. I feel so sad about that guy because he will be so shocked to hear. He was always making jokes even when on fever. And now that he has no fever because the meds are working he looks very happy. I have his face glued on my mind. We will have the results possibly on Monday and I'm so worried how he will take this. I have arranged a meeting with our psychologist too because I'm afraid of his reaction. I know it's unprofessional but I just wanna hug him and tell him that we're all there for him he's not alone. But the stigma is here. Half the people don't wanna be the ones who will draw blood from him.

I am really curious if all these guys that say they were sodomized at young ages or by parents/siblings/uncles (or both) are honest or its just a deep desire they want to believe. I was fucked at 18 (some days before 19). It was a bit of a rush actually. I wanted sex before becoming 19 for some reason. I was too shy. The guy was hot (but I think I wouldn't like him now at all) but he was a very bad choice. He was acting mechanically, not intimacy. He did not "care" despite knowing I was a virgin. It's not that he was aggressive or something. It was just like he had a work to do with me and that was it. When I kissed my bf for the first time, it made me think that love, sex, passion or whatever you call it must feel like this. That's why love is represented with a heart, because it makes your heart beat faster. And even lust can make your heart beat faster. But not empty, mechanical hook ups.

I always thought highly of ICU nurses. I've met many nurses who were ehm.. bad. But every ICU nurse I've met.. well they feel fully skilled for whatever comes and I suppose this comes from the extensive training it requires. ICU is a weird place imo. It sometimes feels as a limbo on earth for me. I just try not to cry when somebody dies. I don't think I've seen any sexism/racism there. It's the OR that sexism derives from. Sounds like an internist or a GP to me, I don't think we have someone else for these. When I show up in the patient room, it's because something bad is happening. wish we had them too. Here, the residents draw blood, or students. Nurses just refuse to do so. It mostly depends on who is bullying who. I can't bully anyone to draw blood but if the professor bullies nurses they will draw blood. Seriously. This is how it works. I don't draw blood an anesthesiology resident but they call me when every other attempt has failed. usually I do that too That's a joke here. The worst combo though is doctors + midwives Nurses here will either spot a mistake you've done and instead of finding a way to fix it/tell you they well the professor (this is the arc-nurse who does that). They may call you useless behind your back, gay/slut (depends on the mood) and they will not draw blood. This is invaluable. I have an anesthesiology nurse with me (he's actually still a student in his internship but this is as far as the help I receive can get) who had almost no knowledge of anything practical. I noticed that the problem with him was his fear. So I was always cool with him and I guided him in many procedures. He can even intubate now and he is the best nurse I could have around. I've never met a transgender in my life. I've only seen in the street. I always wonder where are all these people here. I don't know their numbers but I should have seen them somewhere. We are not as open minded I'm afraid. Male surgeons tend to talk about football and female parts (with a particular interest in boobs). There is a particular one who says that it's not possible for a man to like another man.

No it's not. Especially when it comes to a patient reaching out for a doctor, he should fine the one he thinks most appropriate. A large part of medicine is the connection between the doctor and the patient (in older books I have found it referred as the therapeutic alliance)

Happy new year to everyone my all times goal remain to continue loving and be loved

Well in Greece things were always weird with religion. A bit of a long story but even though in terms of law government and church are separate entities, in practice they are not. We've seen many times priests blessing with holy water sterile equipment in ICU during the pandemic, we've seen priests talking against gay people and even saying they will ban from the church (maybe the word is aphorized if i use the greek one with a bit of imagination) whoever votes in favor of some laws that support gay people. But in our capital (more than half of our population) you will not have to marry for religious reasons I've heard terrible stories about people adjusting their insulin dose because they can't afford the needed quantities, is this true? In Greece things are broken in the healthcare section for other reasons. We have public hospitals where every citizen can receive the help he needs (and even expensive drugs such as antiviral drugs for HIV/HBC/HCV etc). BUT.. we have many shortages in stuff because nobody actually hires. We have people migrate to find better salaries and work environments. There can be patients not in beds but in portable beds outside the rooms because clinics can be too full. I could be going on and on forever about this. when I had gynecology I was like oh my, this is how this system works? I feel lucky to be a man. two days ago there was an old guy who had tremor and a bit of dementia. He would grab anything. My stethoscope, my arm, the sphigmomanometer and any catheter. thanks for that. but doesn't hospitalist means someone who works inside the hospital and not in private practice? Cause anesthesiologists almost excusively work in hospitals. I think it's easy to care and it doesn't take time to just cover with a blanket a patient who complains instead of getting to the other doctors and complain altogether about the complaining patient. I didn't know that doctors spend considerably less time with the patient compared to the nurse. But now I see how this happens. I get you on wanting to have that knowledge. My first degree was in dentistry and my desire was medicine so I did medicine after dental school just for that. Also true. But some people don't even realize their addiction. Plus, I'm not a drinker myself so even a glass of wine surpasses my semester intake. Unfortunately in my hospital they last. And they make us acclimated with the toxic behavior. And another unique thing. Nurses here don't feel like drawing blood. We tend to do it. Or even medical students. We have even some not measuring pressure because it's a doctor's thing. lmao

That's good to hear. Maybe the world needs a specialty about sexual health. But not one where I'm going to give advice to gay women because I've no idea what they do between them. But advising gay guys, that I can do it well. Wish I had that dilemma. You will rarely meet someone attractive. I think that str8 gynecologists tend to have lots of appealing women because every woman needs a smear test, an ultrasound or whatsoever once every year or more, but not every health young man needs a doctor to check his dick. So the ones we check are not appealing. I'm an anesthesiologist trainee so the body parts that I touch are the hands for a catheter (the genitals are usually the nurse's part) and I have to pass down a tube from the throat and that's pretty much it. Unless it's trauma. But everything is too bloody there to even have the time to think.

I've read your story before, I think you have said that this was due to your religious background? It's very interesting what you have experienced. So are you happy in nursing now? I've only see some porn with women (just because the dude was hot) or (even worse) I've seen fem porn so the genitalia were a bit altered due to hormones I guess. So I had a bit false expectations about the size of a clitoris which was not an enlarged as was expecting. I also had practical issues of identifying urethra from vagina but I got over it. But if I could chose to never see female genitalia I would pick it. Thankfully I did not chose to become a gynecologist. I know this may sound weird, but putting catheters on guys has helped me because I like sounding. I'm trying to help people who like that to do it in a safe way so as not to cause any harm. I think that many medical practitioners demonize some sexual practices. But in my eyes, whether they like it or not some practices exist and will exist and if we wanna do something useful we should teach the right way. My worst fear in a catheter is filling the balloon inside the urethra. I hope this will never happen. Of course it does. And that is why I want the patient to feel freely to say you know what I got fucked and I saw blood. It would be a crucial knowledge to have regarding where to search and what pathology I'm expecting. And I can't tell it's the patients to blame. How on earth do we expect patients to be sincere if we make fun of them being gay? And I don't know about USA or other countries, but in Greece I would be too skeptical of being sincere. And nurses are the worst on that. I don't know if this is a Greece's thing but a typical nurse is woman and religious and likes to gossip people. And I don't know what should I do. Put a flag on my head and say LGBTQ+ friendly doctor? Most guys make me wonder how could they look when they were younger. Some guys make me feel that they were always sick and weird looking. And you can see others that are old but you can see it in their eyes that they are alive and have many things that keep them going. There was a patient who was straight and very good looking. Actually I think that I am rarely attracted by a "stereotypical hunk". I have some triggers. Shorter guys, lean, preferably gingers. I had such a patient who needed a central catheter. I was very stressed (it was my second time). Long story short we've been together many weeks in the hospital. He was very afraid (and I was very worried about the outcome). Eventually everything was okay. Since then he will always send me a gift during my birthday which is very touching and we may go out for a coffee once in a while. He thinks he owns me, I've told him that helping people is what we do in medicine. It was not personal because we help everyone but at the time it is personal because we are happy for each and every one that goes well.

Sometimes I believe sexuality can interfere with medical practice and different sexual orientations could mean different "clinical" knowledge. What I mean. 1) The first time I saw female genitalia was during gynecology in my life (porn won't count). I "had to" touch them to see if there was bleeding (some liquid after labor actually). It was unpleasant. Well, when you see a patient it's not a matter of what you want but of what it must be done so I'm learning to get over this. But a woman knows the female genitalia, a str8 guy does to, a gay guy does not (usually). 2) When I had to put urinal catheters. It was easy with men. I know how to grab a dick (joking) and I know how sensitive it can be from personal experience as an owner of a dick. So I know which things hurt and which don't. In women however I just know there is a pee hole somewhere, I've seen the location from anatomy books etc but I've never made out with a woman so the only real contact that I've had with "a pussy" was only during medicine. Not from my sexual life. But str8 guys and str8 women have experience with both. 3) There were 2 dudes yesterday that came with rectal bleeding (they said they saw blood but we didn't). One of them in particular felt that he was lying. When talking about blood from the anus, especially in a young man I will think hemorrhoids or anal sex (or toy). He was insisting about a food poisoning theory that did not make sense. I tried to make it more private and nobody to hear us (because there are several pairs of ears willing to hear in the ER I'm afraid. During the rectum exam with my finger (it also feels very weird do something that you do during sex but for a medical purpose) I was pretty sure I found lube there. We discussed a bit. He eventually told me that he was having cam sex and he was using a dildo and saw blood. I think that it helped that I was gay. It's not that straight people are bad at this. But I think a gay guy may more suitable to make the patient feel comfortable and guide him. 4) I am not sure how sex drive works from after a certain age. Based on the physiology of female system, it should decline greatly. I don't know any women beyond menopause that I could ask that question, but I hope this is not true because it would be so sad. I also have the curiosity of whether very old men can get aroused. Especially those that are in elderly house I suppose they never ejaculate. It makes me sad. I feel that some people (who live long enough and who have dementia or related pathologies) end up forgetting what they enjoy, forgetting who they are, they beloved ones. They actually stop from being the person their loved ones thought them to be. Now that I think about it, this does not have to do with the title of my topic, but still it makes me sad. Maybe the fear that gays actually don't have kids to look after them and many end up alone is the reason I'm touched by this. Anyway. A final remark. We are told that (at least in my country) it is illegal for a guy to examine a female patient without the presence of another woman. I think this is sexism. I do not like to be viewed as a potential sex assaulter. And if law regards me as a potential one, along with all the male colleagues, why isn't the law the same for women examining a man? I also find totally ridiculous that I should need the presence of another female when I examine a female. I've never hit on a woman in my life but several women have hit on me. These were some thoughts I'd like to share.