Sharp-edge

I've bottomed for many years for my guy and I loved it. At first it was not that good, it felt annoying. Not painful but annoying. Then I begun to like it to the point of asking to get fucked. Yesterday I got fucked by someone who had a long dick. It was a bit fat too, but its main characteristic was that it was longer than that of my bf (don't ask me how long I'm not good at measuring and in europe we have cm and not inches). So when he got inside me he pushed and I felt a pain. It was a different pain. Rather sharp I'd say. It felt as if he found a barier or something and he was pushing against it. I felt that after some painful thrusts he got deeper and there oh damn it felt so good. I've heard about the two sphincters etc but I'm not sure it's actually true. 

I do know for sure though that deep there something felt so so so so good.

I call them the sex zombies. They are programmed to have sex although they don't have a use for it. 

This period I'm a little naughty. My bf is abroad and we have discussed that we can have sex with others for a change (we have done some threesome play but it was always the three of us).

My biggest issue is that I hate apps. What I enjoy is flirting. Trying to find out who could be interested in me and how to further pursue. I've had some sex with colleagues. Not colleagues of my direct environment but colleagues with the broader sense. My last was a guy that I found to be quite hot. Or to put it more precise, he was physically what pleases my eye (and sometimes what pleases my eyes does not pleases many other people's eyes but anyway).

We've had sex several times. He likes to be somewhat dominated during sex. For me to have control (not to a master/slave level, I'm not into that but he likes receiving my actions and not being a doer).

Sometimes I think that the direct source of pleasure for me is not fucking, getting fucked sucking etc. It's when somebody lets me touch his body, when my fingers travel around his body. I also like biting (not too cause pain, softly) but I don't do it because I understand that they don't like it. Before, during and after sex I am kissing him. I like hugging him. We had shower together, I enjoyed washing his body and his hair. He said that it's the first time he's been given that much affection in a hook up. He liked it but the way he said it, it made me feel weird.

Firstly, I don't like being called a hook up and I don't do hook ups. A hook up feels fast and without quality. I do sex only when it's worth it and always loving my partner. We also had more than 10 times sex that's almost a fuck buddy.

Secondly this dude is cold. I don't believe he can give affection. I don't feel that he succumbs to me when we're having sex, I believe he's full of himself and he finds it interesting that somebody actually takes time to take care of him since he's not that guy.

I've heard that too. They say that they're top but for some weird reason they're into bottoming with you.

22 minutes ago, BlindRawFucker1 said:

The widely held belief is, that those of us with any type of disability, whether physical or psychological, are “NOT” sexual beings.

 

There are far too few studies on the sexual habits of disabled people.

 

That stems from the social discomfort of talking about sex.  Also, why talk to “those” people if they aren’t doing it?  It might put ideas in their heads.

 

Even people with severe mental or psychological issues, often develop normally in a physicle sense.  So, males have erections and ejaculate, females have periods.  But, those things are often ignored and swept under the carpet.

 

Please, if you encounter someone with such a disability, at least be nice and say hello to a fellow human being.

 

Who knows, you might learn something, and make a friend.

I've encountered many people with genetic defects where we provided genetic counseling. The interesting part for me was the identification of a particular lesion in the DNA or chromosomic level. There were some people that you could tell they would never have sex. I remember a girl with a noonan syndrome. I was sure she would never have sex because of how severe her syndrome was but she was such a sweet creature that everybody wanted to hug. On the other hand there was a man in his 20s where he was hot but his teeth where a bit malformed and he was aggressive and a bit rude. For many (maybe even for me) he would be that bad guy that you dream to fuck you hard. But all these were not his choice, it was his phenotype that made him rude/aggressive.

What I like about genetic counseling and the management of genetic diseases is that we're trying to find solutions not problems. I sometimes think that these people may be sad for several challenges that they face and I hope that when they leave our office they can jump over these challenges. At least most of them.

Quite recently I've met several people with genetic disorders. Any kind. From ones that affect one's mind resulting in a reduced IQ (I think it is called mental retardation although I think that retardation is an offensive word but a native speaker could enlighten me), to autism spectrum disorders. There were others that affect only one's looks as in the case of albinism but there also more severe syndromes like Marfan syndrome that results in a very tall person with cardiac defects. My whole point is that all these people deviate considerable from what we may call average yet there among us and live their lives. I was just wondering, if these people have sex. I prefer thinking of all these not as diseases, but as alternative versions of genes that do not work well in the world as we have constructed it over the ages.

Some of these people I think they cannot have sex. Their mind is in a very altered state and they should be protected. Have you ever encountered during your app cruising anybody that fits this description? Was it a turn on/turn off? Would you be interested in meeting someone like that? I'm not making it any more specific since all these conditions vary. So I'm mostly referring to people that may not be very smart (decreased IQ, more than the usual non smart guy but in a condition that is considered adequate to consent) or with phenotypes (the way that somebody looks) that are quite different from what we define as "normal".

I was the typical guy who as a teen and later as a young (naive) adult I was really into policemen and to a lesser extend I was into military men. I never got to have sex with any of those two categories back then. I was closeted and in the gay apps they were hard to find. Even if somebody told you that he was a policeman (but you couldn't really know that he was indeed) he would be the guy that would not send a photo. Thus no meeting had ever proceeded (thankfully things are better in this in Greece). As I got a bit older and I came to know more about police and the military (incidents on the news and some people that I met in the university etc) I started to loathing them. It would seem that their whole existence was based on when to get a day off and being lazy. At times of need they would seem inadequate to perform their duties and many of them not physically fit for that. The worst combination of all was (and still is) the military doctor thing. Those greedy people who think that are superior to citizen doctors and that the state has given them crazy privileges. So despite that the adolescent me would picture a policeman as a fit, hung, horny or any other attractive scheme, that image broke into thousands of tiny fragments.

Then again, my profession is almost considered a turn on for someone (doctor here). But for me not as a common as I thought it would be besides the classic "check my prostate" or "are an urologist" thing. I've been approached by people who are into poppers believing I could coach them hard or into guys that are into breathplay. I assured them that while I would not take part in such activities I will be the doctor they will need in the ER when these games go wrong.

Ironically, my expired policemen fantasy was fulfilled though. It almost resembled the revenge is served cold thing. There was a policeman that I'd meet quite often in the ER and we became to come a bit closer over time. One day he asked me out. He was a sexy guy but I had never really observed me. My mind was always clouded with "dude on the left is bleeding, elderly to the right is septic" and "policeman guy at the front" to even decipher his face. At that moment I felt one of the most pleasing and interesting sentiments. I felt how it feels to be desired. We dated for quite some time before somebody found the courage to make a move. We fucked many times (he was clumpsy it was more than obvious he was not very comfortable with guys and he was with women -don't ask me why-). So my fantasy was fulfilled multiple times with him and he did all that we wanted to. Eventually he got married to a woman.

What's your desire profession, if any?

My english teacher (Greece here) happened quite unexpectedly to be a Scottish guy. We had great chemistry together. I was having private lessons with him for 5-6 years.

(In Greece everybody takes english lessons, typically outside of school either in the form of a class or of private lessons and usually we reach the B2 or C2 level)

Everything was great. He was very passionate about teaching. The only downside for my parents was that I had a Scottish accent. I was seriously in love with him. He had a cute blond to almost white beard (he was somewhere around 30), his eyebrows where almost white and his hair where brown-blond something. All that were too exotic for a virgin study like I was. I never dared do anything because I'd be sure he would be either straight (my guess is that he was) or he wouldn't be interested (I always had a thing for older guys and I thought that all of the students were too boring).

Through all these years we had many nice moments. He was complaining to me that all his other students were discussing with him their issues but I was the guy who did not say a word ever. We were exchanging gifts for Christmas etc. He would always get me a book and a chocolate bar that he would bring from his journeys back to Scotland. He paid me a visit after I received my english certificate and then it took some years to see him again. It was on the street where he was shocked to see that I had a beard. He told me oh look at you you've become a man and tried to lift me while hugging me. That was a joke. Even as a kid I had nearly his height.

Some years later my father told me he saw him in the street and they discussed for quite some time. He had been treated for a brain tumor. My father said that the Scottish did not tell him all these for him but to reach my ears. I tried to contact him but he had no social and I did not have his number. I was feeling sad. All this time (and before that incident) I had him on my mind. I always loved him but never approached him. Some time ago (not long) I learned that he died (he must have been in his ealry 40s). I felt so heartbroken. I also feel guilty for not contacting him at all all these years. Even after our lessons when I had his number etc. It's just that I'm the guy who has difficulties with all these but it doesn't mean I don't care for others. I'm just sad.

On 3/16/2024 at 3:03 AM, TallAussieBtm said:

Three high powered surgeons/anaesthetists? Even in the short-to-medium term I suspect this situation is probably one of the least important you will all deal with. As fun and challenging as the sex/emotional issues may seem in the moment. You'll all get over it and move forward somehow. 😃 Not downplaying how meaningful the incident may seem soon after it occurred, but honestly I wouldn't worry about it too much. You'll all be fine! 💗☀️🌈

I think our professions get in the way because he's in the most bitchy/diva specialty ever and the fact that he bottomed for two dicks for his first time was a little too much. He was dominated.

I have some news though. We started talking again. He cries several times a day without a clear reason. He keeps on saying that he doesn't feel himself, he feels embarrassed. I told him that he must not be embarrassed and that we both love him and he knows that and nobody is going to know about all this. We will still love him even if he does not want sex again and that we're there for him. Currently he stays in my arms comfortably (and someitmes to my bf's).

My bf is a bit grumpy because he feels that he tried so much to give him a nice experience and he acts like he was  traumatized and he is annoyed. Plus he demands my attention more than before and I feel like I have two supernatural babies that want me to look after them. I'm telling you guys, surgeons are attention-whores.

25 minutes ago, RawNerdUK said:

As others have said, which I agree with, he needs time to sort his own head out... I can only speak from my own experiences. Depression in this case, that at time as much as other want you to talk its not always the way to help. In his head that could be a large mass of conflicting thoughts and until he can make some coherent picture from it all there is not much to talk really about ... other than just a mixed up mess of streams of thought, which would not convey anything useful as it too jumbled up.  Let him come to you when his ready, but of course still "check in" (not too often) to let him know that talking with you is still an option and you are both there for him if and when he is ready... also talk to him about other stuff... Don't fixate on this event as you'll make a mountain out of a ant hill. Gently bring it up but mix in it with other stuff... "How was the weekend?" blah blah... make it clear what happened is just a normal part of life, it's not anything wild and must be one thing one thinks about. It's like how I see myself as a gay man, but that is just an attribute of me, not a thing that fully defines me... </rant>

You are right. I worry about him because I know that he reacts weird in these circumstances. Plus I'm gonna see him either way because I'm the anaesthesiologist in several of his cases (hidden behind our lovely drape though).

1 hour ago, hntnhole said:

That's entirely likely, but even if he doesn't "return for more", that may merely mean he's conquered whatever it was that disinclined him to accept himself

I agree about that but I also think this moment was being built for months if not years.

1 hour ago, hntnhole said:

At some point, maybe you two could invite him out to dinner, at some decent restaurant,

That's a lovely idea. I'm only missing the decent restaurant. All "chic" restaurants have fish-based foods in Athens for some reason and we all hate them.

1 hour ago, hntnhole said:

For a man whose accustomed to being the "powerful" one (i.e. nobody talks back to a surgeon, do they!) I can understand how he might translate getting fucked with "surrendering" his personal "power" to the Top.

My bf is also a surgeon (different kind) and maybe that contributed too. I think that he likes to submit but at the same time he doesn't like that he likes it (I hope that makes sense too). In a kinky mood my bf said that we should lock his dick and he will come begging to get fucked and way more tamed.

1 hour ago, hntnhole said:

Be supportive, be patient, and for heavens sake - don't blame yourself.  

I messaged him that I'm very sad about it and he replied that I'm the most wonderful guy in the world and I shouldn't be sad. He didn't wanted to talk more than that though which doesn't really make sense. If the most wonderful guy out there messaged me I would like to talk to him.

I'm having a partner/boyfriend for 10 years. We're very happy together. We have a friend, who was actually my friend but later he became a common friend. We know him from work. His basic three characteristics is a) he's a constantly working surgeon b) he's cute c) he looks cold and narcissistic to the outside but he's very fragile inside. Cutting a long story short we ended up having sex with him. He was supposed to be straight but he hadn't had sex from university based on what he said. He was believing to be asexual and he had no real interest in family/wife/kids because he believed he would get cheated (because he works all the time). He comes to our place very often he even sleeps at our place (and eats). I believe that he could have a wife/girlfriend if he wanted to because I know lots of people who would fall for a sexy doctor with a good income.

We had sex the previous week the three of us. We really enjoyed it. It was one of the best experiences of my life. Apart from the physical contact that fucking feels good, I enjoyed watching him how he reacted. I got pleasure from his pleasure (does this make sense?). I saw something in him that I had not seen before. I felt something protective towards him and so did my bf. We took a shower together after that. I had in mind that this could be a shock for him. Despite that everything felt nice and he enjoyed it, now he's at a weird state. He says that he doesn't know who he is anymore. He looks sad. I worry because of how he reacted to that. My bf says that he knows that we love him but he just needs time and that he will return for more. He also says that getting fucked may got interfered with his narcissism and his taste for power and he can't swallow that easily. I just wanted somebody's thoughts on that too. Could it be that he just needs time? I blame myself for that.

When I have a usual encounter with my bf, my asshole feels okay. It doesn't hurt or something or if I try to contract the muscle it feels normal. However if he is rough I can feel it for some time the same day. Things are different with fisting. I feel stretched for several days after and I like that. It's a weird type of pleasure because it is not during fisting but hours and almost days after that. Do you feel that way too? I think it's somewhat erotic/arousing to feel stretched. Maybe trying dildos would be similar but I've never tried one.

On 2/17/2024 at 11:01 PM, lower_bucks_bottom said:

When I was in Greece I was told that all marriages are through the church and there are no civil marriages. Was that true and if so how will this work? Just curious. 

that is not true (unless you were here before 1982 or the person who told you so was not very up to date

Sounds like when I'm losing a pen everytime asks for one. I get your frustration.

[think before following links] https://www.theguardian.com/world/2024/feb/15/greece-becomes-first-orthodox-christian-country-to-legalise-same-sex-marriage

That's a victory that means a lot for the rights of all gay (and the rest of the LBGTQ+) people in Greece and I'm really happy about it. It needed the support of 3 different parties (because not everyone from these parties voted for it). The church said terrible things these days for the politicans who would vote for it and threatened them with banish from the church. Maybe we're leaving mediaeval times. Maybe it's time for a renaissance. 

The royal family of UK is often in the news these days due to the health issues of some of their members. I keep on hearing about the royal couples so that's why it crossed my mind. I suppose it must be very difficult to be gay and royalty especially if you are the prince of the crown. Not a common problem of course I understand. So I am curious would those in charge of the royal image (who would most possibly know) try to find you a wife? Would they help you find a lover in secret while you would have the image of a straight guy? I am intrigued by the idea of having some hunk bodyguards to protect me. Maybe you could have an affair like Whitney Huston with her bodyuguard in the well known movie.

15 hours ago, hntnhole said:

That's an interesting point you make.  Lots of guys today weren't around before all the apps and whatever, and had to either sit alone or get their asses out and mingle with the rest of the crowd.  That's how guys used to meet, sniff each other's ass, and decide whether or not to fuck.  Meeting in-person at some bar/club, walking down the street, in some store, wherever they both happened to be, and at the same time. 

Meeting a "Cinder-fella" just doesn't happen all the time in real, actual life, and most of us don't need absolute perfection anyway.  No guy - including ourselves - is perfect.  Having faults, working to better ourselves is part of being human.

Some guys feel just uninterested. Their hunger is satisfied for seconds while scrolling. They may jerk and they get back to work/their lives. This is a vicious cycle that some people have fallen in. I'm not sure if those who call themselves bators actually want it or they are inside a hard-to-realise loop. 

Cinder-fella huh? Never heard of that term before. For me it's not about perfection. I do need to like the guy. Mostly his face and an average body. What I need is to have someone be an inspiration for me. This can tie the whole thing and make it last when the lust fades.

I'm trying to decipher this behavior (of not actually meeting).

Many people seem to be busy. Or act like it. Some people connect and they may say oh you know what I'm not logging in frequently. So I'm like what are you doing here then? Some other people say "I'm not looking for something". But come on you're in a dating app how can you be here without wanting something? And then we have the guys that are too hasty. They want u to go for a coffee right now. Sorry but I can't drink coffee or other beverages with someone because I just like his one profile photo. I need a little more contact than that. I'm not afraid to "invest" some of my time.

Sometimes I think that maybe a majority of gays are having unrealistic expectations. That is why they are not interested too meet in real like. They wait for a prince or something. When I met my guy it was in real life without using an app. I had not seen him naked before I actually get him unrdressed. 

If I could magically change two parameters in the game called love, I would a) increase the percentage of gays (at least three times) and either make gays have realistic standards or make gays extraordinary lovable. When a gay guy loves another guy he has to overcome many obstacles. Is he gay too? Is he sexually what he needs? We end up in small numbers, especially in the countryside. Instagram has made us a global village with hot men sharing their fake life. And some people got stuck in that.

For me love is simple. It takes a glance. When your eyes meets his the rest are on their way. Like a chemical reaction. All we need is bring the two reactants into a reasonable distance.

3 hours ago, MountMe63 said:

That is a bullseye. Most of the millennials I know are only interested in how much money they can make, and they want to work as little as possible to get that. They seem only interested in money so they can craft a perfect lifestyle that shows up well on social media.

I regret to admit that it feels you are right. Was it always like that? I have the feeling that everybody talks about money. I see tens of stupid IG profiles about how a stupid almost sexy guy now has a laborgini and is somewhere in Dubai and wants to share that advice. Everybody wanting to be a dermatologist (among medical students) because of well.. money. Everything revolves around money. I'm not rich but come on there are other things in life to crave.

1 hour ago, ErosWired said:

Something that underscores this is the increasing frequency of times when I’ll get a hit on one of the apps saying, ‘wyd’, and I tell them what I’m doing, then ask ‘How about you?” And they reply, “Bored.” So they’ve lost the skills to stimulate themselves offline, and now they’re growing so oversaturated and desensitized to what they find online that nothing online stimulates them either.

 

I always liked to chat with older guys in my first days of the internet. These guys could hold great conversations. And I'm not talking about have me fall for them. You could even make friends. Now it feels like talking to a half-finished AI-based creature.

28 minutes ago, ErosWired said:

So I don’t think it’s that millennials are any less sexy than anyone else, they have just emerged into a world in which humanity has been trapped in an electronic fishbowl of its own design, and now they can only swim in small, unsatisfying circles.

You are 100% right. However I'm a millenial and I don't like all these. What I enjoy is flirting with someone that it happened to meet him outside. My best friend keeps on sending me IG posts of hot guys that he thinks I would like. He is right these guys are hot for me BUT I'm not interested for every random ginger dude out there. I know that there are many hot guys out there in the globe. But these are almost "Fake". Egocentric, egomaniac people that they are half porn starlets and half influences. I'm sick of that.

In Greece's planetromeo spamers are the norm. How to identify them? Hot masculine dudes who are passive with a new profile.

I'm posting also this link for a related article but you can find many others of this topic ([think before following links] https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2023-08-03/young-adults-less-sex-gen-z-millennials-generations-parents-grandparents)

As a millenial myself I recognise this. You can find porn everywhere and sometimes jerking can be way easier. Nobody seems to care meeting people. Some are what I call sex zombies. They want you to meet them right this instant. No matter if it's snowing, if it's 3am, if you tell them you're dying no they don't care. You have to meet them. And when you do they already search for the next one the moment you walk away. But many others are just unavailable. Instagram is full of half naked half-unclosetted gays who don't actually do something. Many of them also have Twitter where they just show their body and genitals and many also have onlyfans. Whoever has a dick sees it as a means of making money I'm afraid.

The only type of people that I think are relatively easy to meet are those who like to bate with someone else.

I always thought I had a tendency of being horny. As a person who tends to overthink, I started to overthink about it. I discovered that it's not the desire for sex that drives my lust. I'm not even sure if lust or the feeling of being horny is my driving force. I always appreciate the male body and a guy in general. His hair, his smile, his body everything can be a tiny trigger for me. But the biggest trigger it turns that it's something different. It's what I feel when a guy that I find sexy smiles at me. It's overflowing. And at the end of the day, we search for thinks that make us feel good. Some times these things are not good for us. We may abuse food just for a small dopamine rush that lusts for minutes and eventually developing bad habits. And maybe the same goes with sex. We feel that rush but we do not feel saturated. We need more and more. There's a guy that I like. I like him quite a lot. I don't even know if he's gay or even if he is, if he likes me. It doesn't matter. Today, after I was not around for 2 days he sent that he missed me, he touched my shoulder and smiled at me. I reflect that moment and I smile like a fool. This pleasure lusts way longer for me than a random hook up, than a silly comfort food snack or anything else. I think everybody needs moments like this. It doesn't have to be anything special, nowhere specia. Just a smile. A touch. It can work wonders.

On 1/20/2024 at 9:54 PM, hntnhole said:

However, I have no faith in magic.  Thus, "faith" compounded with required belief in magic, makes no sense to me at all.  

I think people are prone to have faith in something. That's why they eventually believe things that make no sense to some other people but they are true for them. I'm sure there is an evolutionary reason behind this.