ErosWired

Once in Atlanta, a Top jacked me off into his palm when I was ass-up and then transferred the whole load straight to my ass. It wasn’t for lube, though - he’d already finished fucking. I think he just got off on the idea of breeding me with my own seed. I’ve gathered, frozen, and inserted my own on multiple occasions, but I usually don’t jack off with enough regularity to build up a frozen supply.

The thing about ass is that there is in fact no such thing as a ‘clean ass’. By a ‘clean ass’ we mean that there is no trace of fecal matter present, but the colon is an internal organ from start to finish, and there is no place in it that isn’t teeming with bacteria. Most of the bacteria are beneficial or benign, but some are not. There’s also mucus that makes things move along, and that ‘natural lubrication’ so many bottoms claim to produce is just that. Bacteria thrive in it. Just because a bottom has rinsed out thoroughly does not mean all the bacteria have been rinsed out, and you wouldn’t want them out, as they’re needed for the function of the organ. So don’t kid yourself that you can be careful or that you can sense when it’s safe to proceed. The inside of the ass isn’t ‘clean’ and can’t be made ‘clean’.

Not in as many words, of course. But the CDC has issued a warning about an increase in the spread of treatment-resistant Shigella bacteria that cause shigellosis. The case incidence increased by 5% from 2015 to 2022, and one of the principal communities affected was, naturally, men who have sex with men. Transmission is generally along the fecal-oral route, so sticking your tongue deep into an ass is basically opening an express lane. Fatality is rare, but the symptoms are fever, abdominal cramping, and bloody diarrhea, and there are no recommendations for treatment if those symptoms become severe in the case of a drug-resistant strain. I don’t rim and never have for this exact reason. Here’s a link to news about the report: [think before following links] [think before following links] https://www.cnn.com/2023/02/25/health/cdc-shigella-health-advisory/index.html

I would just add a couple of embellishments to this otherwise sound and useful information: Lubes: I recommend avoiding leaving a bottle of silicone-based lube out for Tops to use. They invariably spill it and create a slipping hazard right where you want a Top to have fucking traction. Also, while Vaseline is a popular go-to for many bottoms, for extended cumdump sessions an organic rather than petroleum-based lube may be an advisable alternative, as it allows moisture to move through tissues, whereas lubes like Vaseline seal them. You’ll stay more resilient over the long haul. Blindfolds: These are a matter of some debate in cumdump circles. Though there’s nothing quite like the sensation of feeling that finger touch your hole out of nowhere, the risk inherent in cumdumping with your senses impaired is high, particularly if flying solo. Some will say too high. As your vulnerability increases, so does the risk of assault. The risk of theft escalates, and a blindfold is essentially out of the question if, for instance, you brought a laptop with you. Self-Defense: I may have missed it, but I did not see a mention in the original post about bringing a means of self-defense. Unless you happen to be a Black Belt and your body classifies as a living weapon, you may wish to consider bringing some means of deterring a physical assault. I never cumdump without my weapon, concealed but handy. At no time in the years I’ve surrendered my hole to strangers have I ever needed to use it. But I wouldn’t go without it. Location: One additional consideration I have found essential is external room access - room doors that open to the outside. As mentioned by some, don’t require Tops to pass through a lobby and walk past a set of eyes to get to you. I won’t even book a room unless the facility has external entry. This does come at the cost of a level of security, but cumdumping has, frankly, a relatively high risk-to-reward ratio. A field behind a locked gate does not get plowed. Cleanout/Eating: As explained, thorough cleanout prior to arrival is essential. It’s also advisable to bring a means to do it on-site, and while there are various bottle- syringe- and bulb-type solutions, I have found these only practical for emergency situations. To ensure emptiness at depth from an onsite cleanout, you really should pack either a traditional enema bag and line, or one of the portable lines designed to slip over the bathtub faucet. As to this last item, however, note - the ones that I usually find available are designed to fit over round faucets, and what shape is the faucet in whatever hotel I pick? Square. Every fucking time. Shop around. The OP suggests avoiding eating during the cumdumping session, but this can be a manageable matter with a little planning, and if you’re going to be cumdumping for an extended (say, 2-3 day) period, that level of fasting is impractical and will leave you without the energy needed to perform. The thing to remember is that anything you eat is going to make its way to your large intestine (upper) within 6-8 hours - but it will take that matter 24-36 hours to make its way to your rectum. So if you start with an empty bowel and plan to cumdump for 12 hours, you could eat something after 4-6 hours and it would only enter your bowel by the time you were done. In fact, you could probably snack lightly throughout the session and only a portion of it would be in transit through your ascending colon by quitting time. That is, unless you ate something to irritate or stimulate the bowel and hasten its action. The other caveat, of course, is if you intend to accept deep fisting. Keep all lanes clear for that. Some may suggest using Immodium to keep your gut clear - this is not recommended. Immodium short-circuits the bowel’s mechanism for moving waste out, which multiplies the difficulty you would have in cleaning out when and if you need to. Better to manage it with planned diet and careful pre-cleaning. Duct Tape: (Recommended over ‘duck tape’ - taping ducks together never works 😉) If you’re going to do open-door cumdumping, the issue of arranging the door often requires some finesse. Hotel doors are generally designed to lock automatically against entry from the outside even if unbolted, so open-door usually means defeating the mechanism - which is where the duct tape comes in. You can use the tape to either a) try to restrain the latch from falling into position; or b) block the slot into which the latch would fit. Because the latch is spring-loaded, the first option seldom works well. Better to cover the hole. The door may or may not, however, be hung plumb, and if the latch does not engage the door may want to swing open. In this case you need to rely on the friction between the door at the latch and the frame at that point to prevent unwanted opening. Unfortunately, there can sometimes be a gap of millimeters between them. In this case, you can apply the duct tape in layers to build up a buffer. If the space is very great, a piece of corrugated cardboard sandwiched between layers of duct tape can help bridge the gap. Whatever tape combination you use, you will likely need to check it between fucks to ensure that it’s holding position. If you can keep the door unlocked but can’t keep it closed, one other option is a simple rubber wedge doorstop. I take one with me every time I go. You may have to replace it each time, but it usually does the job in a pinch. The only fly in this ointment is when you get a Top who responds to your open-door no-loads-refused cumdump ad and the first thing he asks when he walks in is if he can lock the door. 🙄 Then you have to decide whether to accommodate him and rip out your whole carefully arranged setup, or refuse. The ideal situation is a Top like one who one took me in a ground-level motel room facing the parking lot, who came in, pulled me toward the door, and started assfucking me with the door wide open. Honey Badger did not care.

If it’s any consolation, I make things complicated for myself in my own head 24/7. There are lots of threads in this vein on this site, asking men to reveal the most unsavory/scandalous/raunchy/depraved you-name-it thing they’ve done. It tends to draw the fantasists and fiction writers out like a sponge sucks up water, to see who can sound like the most unrepentantly reprehensible sexual deviant. You ask, if not here as a platform, then where? Absolutely here, because this community is jaded and cynical enough about this subject matter to recognize and call out the bullshit when it hears it. It’s the fact that this community is able to entertain such a discussion and keep it on some kind of rails that makes it even possible to have a place like this without it becoming a vile cesspool, and that’s why we don’t do threads where people are only allowed to speak in proscribed ways. I might have an opinion about the things you said you’ve done. I do, in fact. I haven’t offered it, and feel no need to. But if guys are going to throw horseshit right in front of me on my screen, they can expect me to tell them how it smells.

You preface this with ‘no judgy comments’, but you have already yourself placed a judgment on the contents by labeling them ‘evil’ in the very title, so that would seem to open the discussion up to a qualitative assessment of what’s being confessed. At the very least, the nature of the thread begs whether or not the question is being asked in order to glorify such behavior, which would seem to make it fair game for comment. Besides which, what you’re basically saying by starting such a thread that way, is, ‘I’m going to tell you what an asshole I’ve been, but you’re not allowed to tell me I’ve been an asshole.’ R-i-i-i-g-h-t…

Now that I think about it, I may have actually said that to you. I mean, it’s true.

We’re supposed to speak? Men don’t come to my room for scintillating repartée. I sort of figure that if you’re engaged in a meaningful conversation whilst in the middle of a raw breeding, you’re not doing either thing well.

I am always put off by men who go out of their way to sound gay, to exaggerate the effect, to apply the vocal equivalent of a limp wrist, or to address everyone as bitch, girl, or sister. That’s not so much a question of tonal quality as affect, although I believe there may be a subtle tonal quality that distinguishes homosexual voices - I can very frequently hear it.

I’m home tonight, it’s Sunday - Superbowl Sunday in fact, which signifies nothing to me since I’ve never watched football in my life. The clock was closing on 8:00 pm, and I had just heated up a bowl of soup for a late supper. I planned to read the news online while I ate it, and then probably think about getting some rest, as I had been up late the night previous. Tonight seemed like a good night to just unwind. The cat agreed; she wanted me to go the fuck to bed so she could have the house to herself for the night, and was blunt about it, so I wasn’t going to argue. I started to take a spoonful of my soup, and a signal came from my phone - the special bloop that only Kik makes. I checked it. Sometimes it’s just spambots, but on occasion… Hi - Are you available tonight? I’d love to come see you. Damn. “Come see you” meant “come fuck you”. It was the local Top who comes to my house to cunt me semi-regularly. He usually texts me on Kik about an hour before he wants to breed, which is, frankly, short notice. With rare exceptions, he’s the only person who comes to my house to fuck me. The fact that he does means that my preparation for him isn’t just rinsing out my intestines and cleaning my body so that it can be used, I also have to make sure the rooms are presentable, the bathroom is clean enough for company, etc. - I have to play the host as well as the sex object. But I do not refuse a man who claims my ass, if it is within my power. So tonight I left my soup on the table, shut the (annoyed) cat in the living room, and with one hour’s notice I straightened three rooms, cleaned the bathroom, gave myself a basic pre-fuck cleanout, and still had enough time to watch a little porn to remind me what I’m for before I heard the telltale rattle of the doorknob as he came in. My soup was cold, of course, after he left. The cat was, and is, pissed. My chance at a laid-back Sunday evening was lost. Now, you might say, So what? You got fucked, didn’t you? Bonus! The thing is - and this is how I know - tonight, at this particular point, I didn’t want to. I really didn’t want to have to let that Top come fuck me. So why did I? Nobody had a gun to my head. I wasn’t being coerced. For all that is said on this forum about how bottoms “must” submit to Tops, the truth is we really don’t have to if we don’t want to. Tonight wasn’t a case of me secretly wanting to - I really didn’t. But I did it anyway. That’s how I know. The fact that something in me compels me to respond contrary to my own interest and desire tells me that the impulse isn’t contrived or imagined. It’s genuine. It’s real. I know I’m meant to be fucked by men and to serve their sex because doing so comes so naturally and automatically that the impulse to do it is as powerful as instinct and the imperative is hard-wired into my body and my mind. I have cold soup in my bowl and his hot cum in my ass. That’s how I know.

The problem is, most of the men who fuck me never bother to speak to me, so I have no way of knowing their political inclination, and since Republican cock in my cunt feels just like Democrat cock, there’s really no way to discriminate. 🤷🏼‍♂️

It isn’t rooted in one particular happenstance, anywhere - it happens over and over again, throughout history, around the world, and the enslavement of people of color is only one face of using a classification of people as “other” to justify injustice. Even in the United States, there have been numerous variations on the theme. Look at the internment of people of Asian descent at Manzanar during the second World War. Look at the discrimination of Irish immigrants around the turn of the last century. Anywhere there’s a homogenous community that faces the prospect of people unlike them, this behavior tends to emerge, because as soon as people gain a little power, the first thing they start to fear is losing it. I think its root is in the primitive part if the brain, an outgrowth of the fight-flee-freeze survival instinct. The members of the herd see a potential threat in something unlike them; they fear the source of the perceived threat; they hate what they fear; and they lash out against what they hate, and try to control it. It’s become in vogue now to tar men of Western European descent with this brush, as it should be - Caucasian males have behaved atrociously toward practically everyone at some point. But the happenstance of their race isn’t the cause. There isn’t something in the genes that makes them so in a way not found in people with different levels of melanin in their skin. It’s the dark, soiled underbelly of human nature, and it can occur wherever humans are found because we’re so fucking insecure as a species. We really hated not being at the top of the food chain early on, and we never got over it. Once we figured out that we could gang up on the leopards to control them, it was but a step to realize it also worked on people.

You misunderstand me. Yes, in the US, the injustice has been perpetrated because white people have been the majority in power, and thus the ones to react in such a way toward those who are “other” because their skin color, national origin, religion, you name it, was not that of the dominant white culture. But my point is that it’s not something about having white skin or Western European ancestry that has caused them to behave this way, it’s because they’re human, and that’s the way humans in power treat those who aren’t. That’s why we see such treatment repeated in different ways across the globe not just by whites, but by empowered majorities in lots of places, including places where there are no Caucasians. If it were limited to Caucasians, then these other places would be free of it - they’re not. Therefore the behavior must be inherent in human nature.

That isn’t a Caucasian thing, though - it’s a human thing. Around the world, over an over again, we see it, anywhere there are minority populations. The Rohingyas in Myanmar, the Tutsis in Rwanda, the Uighurs in China, the Kurds in Turkey, the Jews practically everywhere, the Palestinians in Israel - the list goes on - all suffering deprivation and injustice up to and including genocide, because the population in power considers them “other”. In many of these places none of the people on either side are Caucasian. In America, in lots of places that Caucasians colonized, non-Caucasians have suffered from being the “other”, but it’s not because those in power were white; it’s because those in power were human. Homo sapiens are a nasty piece of work.

You’ve got this down to a science…

These are good observations, but even though he was young - I did see that before - I can still see a young guy taking it for a couple of reasons. First, there’s a prevalent way of thinking in our culture that if a little of a thing is good, a lot of it should be even better. The guy may be able to readily get a hardon, but he wants a raging hardon that doesn’t go soft, so he pops a pill. Second, ED is not confined to the old. Not long ago I had a 21-year-old come to me because he wanted to Top but couldn’t keep an erection. It was purely psychological, but it was still ED. At one point he was a little inebriated, so I gave him a tic-tac and told him it was a low dose of generic Viagra - *~boing~*! No more soft cock. (I don’t make a habit of deceiving gullible people, but I thought I would give the placebo effect a try.) It’s unlikely, as you say, that he could get a prescription, but a guy can score just about any drug he wants on the street - so I’m told, I personally wouldn’t have a clue how to do it, and don’t want to know. All this said, I’m not convinced that an ED med is the issue in this case, but wanted to respond to that speculation.

Agreed. Even on the slowest day I ever spent at a bathhouse, there was never a moment when a hole was unavailable. If you’re too picky, too timid, or too embarrassed to take advantage of what’s right in front of you, you have no one to blame but yourself. As to the suggestion some have made that he might have taken a Viagra, a couple of things to note: Firstly, Viagra has no effect on erection in the absence of sexual stimulation. An erection occurs because nitrous oxide naturally produced in the penis when stimulated relaxes the smooth muscle tissue in the corpus cavernosum, allowing more blood to enter and swell the organ. Viagra simply enhances the effect of the nitrous oxide, but there has to be nitrous oxide produced for it to have anything to enhance. In other words, you have to at least be thinking about fucking for Viagra to do anything. Viagra doesn’t force you to have an erection, unlike treatments such as Caverject (which requires needle injection directly into the cock), which hardens you no matter what you’re thinking. Secondly, the peak efficacy of Viagra after administration is approximately an hour, and then the effect rapidly diminishes. By about four hours, the compound is largely metabolized. So in order for this dude to have a Viagra-induced aching hardon, he would have probably had to take it within an hour of getting ready to leave, and that makes little sense, especially given that he turned down an offer to fuck.

Getting fucked by the guy I described was definitely too much - which is why I’m already planning to go back.

I think probing with the young man was what caused the problem in the first place… Seriously, though, to the OP - several here have suggested that there is really no legal or ethical issue with what you did, or would be if you continued doing it. I would tend to agree. There is, however, a third consideration: Perception, or what people nowadays call “optics”. If we imagine that, through the young man’s indiscretion (twentysomethings, in my experience, are notoriously indiscreet) that word of this encounter, or encounters if there are more, begins to circulate. The young man may have said to someone, “An old teacher I had in high school ten years ago fucked me. I was a student in his class, but I was only at that school for a year. He probably didn’t even remember me.” Some people hearing that are only going to come away with the words teacher fucked student. And that, or the sense of it, is what gets repeated. Suddenly the public perception is that you did something decidedly unethical, if not criminal. You don’t say whether you are still teaching, but assuming you do, you might (worst case) find yourself subject to an investigation, in which your practices would come into the open, to wit: This teacher has sex with young men. Parents, being what they are, may then assume the worst and decide that you might be a danger to their darling little cherub in your class, and pressure the school administrators to terminate your employment. The fact that you did nothing legally or ethically wrong will matter not one jot. The above is, of course, an extreme scenario, but rumors have a way of metastasizing, and humans seem to want to believe anything scandalous, and let their emotions hijack their brains. None of which addresses how you actually deal with the situation at this point. Somehow I don’t think you can have a conversation with him about him being a former student will be anything but awkward, especially since you already feel awkward about it. Given the potential scenario above, you might be well advised not to say anything, and thereby retaining the plausible deniability that you didn’t know. The fact that he now looks like a different person is in your favor The problem with this tactic is that since you “don’t know” you have no reason to ask him to be discreet about it, and will have to trust the guy not to blab. You could, I suppose, simply tell him that you’re not fully out, and would ask him to be discreet about it, but that assumes further significant contact with him, which I would think is probably unwise. As @BootmanLA points out above, just because he may ask for it again doesn’t mean you have to fuck him again, and you’re under no obligation to explain why. Don’t castigate yourself for having done it - you did nothing wrong. But in the interest of avoiding potential complications, I would advise that you not do it again.

Good for you for not tapping out even though it became unbearable. I had a similar experience in Atlanta last October. He wasn’t quite as long, but went at it for three solid hours. Near the end he commented “I could fuck you all night,” at which point I had to tell him I couldn’t take much more. He powered down on me for another 15 minutes before he came. I was proud that I took him to completion - failing to reward that man with a climax would have been unthinkable.

I understand. There’s a time and a place for displays of affection, especially those that others might misconstrue or misunderstand. I kiss both my brother and father on their cheeks, but in a public or amongst mixed company who might not know our family relationship, the sight of two men exchanging kisses might raise eyebrows. There are other cultures where such expressions are the norm even among unrelated persons - Argentina, southern Italy, parts of the Balkans - where they would think nothing of it. It’s unclear whether you mean you’re ashamed of your feelings about your brother, or simply ashamed to express them publicly. Because you’re gay, do you feel ashamed that you have loving feelings toward your brother, and physical contact, even though those feelings are not sexual in nature? You need not feel that there’s anything wrong in cherishing your brother and your relationship to him. It’s something that has developed organically and naturally over the course of your lives. Like you, my brother is precious to me, and that will never change. You say you don’t need to talk, that each of you knows what the other feels, but if that were so we would not be having this conversation. Clearly, you don’t know what he’s feeling and thinking, and that causes you distress. He may also be uncertain what you’re thinking, because he’s just been confronted with a new perspective on you that may make him question his assumptions about what you feel. At some point, you may need to simply ask him if he’s troubled by what you’ve told him, and use the opportunity to speak about it.

Both of these ^. It strains credulty that he’s 30 and clueless about the existence and nature of homosexuality, and this is coming from me, who was clueless in the way you describe until I got to college. It is possible that, as you say, he simply ignored it because it didn’t intersect his life directly, and your admission was the first time he ever needed to consider it. But his questioning suggests something more. You describe a physical closeness (platonic) that you have always shared with your brother. Unlike many here, you (refreshingly) don’t sexualize or fantasize the situation, and even speculate that you were ‘too close’. That’s an interesting observation that you might elaborate upon. It suggests a level of unease on your part, but you don’t claim ti have had an attraction to him, so what was the source of the unease? Is it possible you were picking up on some aspect of his ostensibly straight behavior that didn’t add up? Let’s assume for a moment that your revelation has caused him to examine the nature of male/male attraction for the first time. This new consciousness might have caused him to identify feelings he himself has that up to now he had no framework to understand or acknowledge. If he had ever felt a tingle of attraction to another male in the past, he might have followed an internal logic that said, Do I feel something about a guy? Well, guys aren’t attracted to guys, and I’m a guy, therefore I must not be feeling anything, and dismissed the sensation. Him having a girlfriend is not proof of anything; many a gay or bi guy has ended up with a girlfriend because it’s the social default. I’m speculating, of course. But as an example, I did not learn that I’m Autistic until my mid-30s. I had always wondered why I wasn’t like other people around me, but it never occurred to me to think I wasn’t just an average person. When I learned that Autism might be a possibility, I suddenly started looking at everything about myself from a new perspective, and asking a lot of basic questions, because suddenly a lot of things started to make a lot of sense. Given that sexual preference is a spectrum, he might well be straight, but have experienced a moment of same-sex attraction a time or two, and is now examining those anomalous feelings with you as a template - you are close brothers after all. Or, he could be very, very deeply closeted in denial, and your admission may have let enough light into that closed closet to let him take a look at himself. Regardless, you are concerned about what to do now that his behavior has shifted. I come from a hugging, kissing family and if you stop hugging and kissing someone, it is obvious that there’s an issue. I would advise you to behave as usual, and hug and kiss him as though nothing has changed at all. He may return to former practice simply out of long habit. This will also do two things: It will make it clear that your homosexuality hasn’t changed you, that you are still the same regular person he has always known, and he doesn’t have to treat you diffetently; and it will reassure him that any feelings he is questioning in himself are acceptable because you provide a positive example. Allow him time to process it all. Since he hasn’t reacted with hostility or rejection at this point, I would say the prospects are good that he will ultimately settle into acceptance. If it affects his self-perception is his own matter, but if so your support will be important.

To answer the immediate question, yes, there are men who are interested in the uninitiated - many a Top likes the idea of fucking a virgin ass or mouth. (I don’t personally understand this, but there it is.) The thing is, though, it may be harder to convince most people that you’ve reached the age of 30 having had no sexual experiences whatever. More likely, they’ll think you’re playing some sort of game - or just flat lying to try to capitalize off the allure of being a virgin. The guy who took my same-sex virginity flatly did not believe me when I said he was the first cock I’d ever taken. We should also qualify what you mean by ‘no sexual experience at all’. Do you mean no intercourse if any kind? No male-male sexual activity? Are you saying you’ve never masturbated (which would strain credulity) or inserted a foreign object in your ass for pleasure? Solo sexual experiences are sexual experiences. It’s possible to be an intercourse virgin and yet be an advanced practitioner in all manner of kinds of self stimulation. I was a very late bloomer myself, did not have any sort of intercourse until I was 23, and didn’t have a sexual experience with another male until I was 37. There are levels of virginity. But the larger issue is to ask yourself why you’ve had no sexual experiences by age 30. This is not unheard of, but it is relatively unusual. If you haven’t even had any solo experiences, that is most unusual, and if that’s in fact the case, then jumping into the deep end of the mansex pool is not recommended. If, on the other hand, you’ve simply been ‘saving yourself’ for the one-and-only Mr Perfect-For-You, then it becomes clear why you’re unfucked at 30 - he doesn’t exist. No one is going to be perfect. Sorry. Even Prince Charming can be kind of a prick sometimes, and you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince. When you say you’re’ not a very social person’, what do you mean? How severe is this? At one end of this there are misanthropic hermits, and on the other, people who mingle but don’t engage. How unsociable are you? This could bear on how you approach sexual encounters, and how successful you can expect to be, particularly if you suffer from social phobia. The good news is that I’m more on the misanthropic hermit side of things and didn’t even start fucking men until I was nearly 40, yet I’ve managed to take over 1,000 cocks so far. You can do it.

I met this fisting Top on Asspig.com, which has a certification feature whereby men are able to relate their experience with a fister/fistee and give a recommendation. This Top has nearly 70 positive certifications and a lot of them are rave reviews.

Unbelievable. Four pages of responses telling the OP that the risk is worth it, yet only three (3) posts mention PrEP, two of them only in passing, and one of those only to say he hadn’t used it. What was my experience taking the risk? AIDS. Not just HIV - AIDS. The result was that I nearly died. That’s the second-to-worst-case outcome, the worst case being that you die. Kind of like playing Russian roulette. If, that is, you do nothing to mitigate the risk, and in this case the most sensible, effective form of risk management is PrEP. If you’re hesitant to fuck bare because of the risk of HIV, good for you, you’re sane. But if you want to fuck bare, get on PrEP, take it as directed, and fuck bare knowing you’ve done the best thing to significantly cut your risk. The earlier comment about facing the regret over ‘what could have been’ doesn’t point out that regret takes different forms. I could be sitting here right now regretting that I had never taken a bare cock…but I wouldn’t be living with HIV/AIDS. Instead, I’m sitting here reflecting on the way my life might have gone if I had not taken bare cock, and regretting what I’ve lost because of it. There is a middle ground where you avoid both kinds of regret here. @evilqueerpig spoke of the four saddest words with respect to regret, but in this case there are four optimistic letters that can trump the four words - PrEP.