Question

[NGE1992]

Not pretending to brag about being a bb-newbie. Since I don't know how to talk about being a slut and dumping my load in any hole available and with the need to tell someone about my it and including the deliberate absence of condoms, a question comes to my mind:

 

Do your family or friends know about your sex life to the point of them know you fuck bare and how do you manage that?

 

I'd like to read from the best to the worst reactions from them.

[NLbear]

My sex life is not something I discuss with my family. In fact, I came out to them when I was 27 (it was a different time, even here in NL). That was the first and last time my "orientation" came up as a topic. My family simply didn't bring it up ever since. No questions asked = no answers they don't like.

My parents have passed away since then but my sister still sticks to that.

[NGE1992]

I included family because some people are very close to a relative.

I'm sorry for your loss. The relationship between my parents and me is not very close either, I'd never discuss my sex life with them, they do know I like men.

[NLbear]

Thanks. And yeah, I am not really close to family either.

 

As for friends. The ones I am close to are all straight. Sex is not a topic we discuss.

And with FB, we don't really talk (much), just fuck.... LOL ;-)

[Guest ff-whole]

I had a friend in my youth, who was straight, but then again NOT... he wasn't really bisexual but liked the idea of getting fisted. I guess he came to some sort of agreement where his wife would fist him...

But I don't discuss the bisexuality of my life with friends or family. period...

I don't think it brings anything of value to any discussion and not close to my family and hardly any friends or acquaintances to mention... So why bother... what I do at home or in private or at the dark wee hours in saunas is for me and maybe a FB I might have or pick up...

Discretion is important to me also because I don't want people at work or in public start guessing. I live on a small Island.

It is not worth the aggravation...

[Guest]

My friends and family know that I am gay, but i never discussed sex life with most family in any real detail. My friends know I swallow but they don't know much and they don't know I fuck raw. I mentioned it to a friend once and she went on the usual point of std's and such. I haven't mentioned it to anyone again

[drscorpio]

I am out to my family. Since I have been with my husband for almost 11 years (married almost 8), I assume they know we fuck bare if they even think about such things. I know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about my brother or sister having sex.

 

They have no idea that we have an open relationship, and he loves to watch me take load after load. 

[Cumfilledbottomboi]

Oh, I have discussed my preference for real, raw sex with friends. But never with family.

[endowed]

I have a brother who lives in another state.  One time he came to CA to visit me and he accompanied me and my boyfriend to the mall downtown.  My boyfriend and I had been together for four years.  This was in a college town (Sonoma State University),  There was a street fair/farmer's market going on.  A guy was walking around and passing out condoms to all of the younger people.

 

He approached us and offered us condoms.  My brother, who is married, told him that he does not need a condom and he told the guy to give it to me and my boyfriend.  I blurted out that we don't use condoms.  My brother's eyes almost came out of his head and he looked as if he was going to faint.

 

Then I posed the question to him, "why is it okay for a heterosexual couple who has been together for a long time to have sex without a condom, but it is not okay for gay couple to do the same thing?"  Of course he response was, "What about HIV?"  My response was that neither one of us has it, so why would we need to use a condom?

 

There was about 2 minutes of total silence while that information was processing in his head.  He was motionless.  Then I guess it finally clicked.  What's good for the heteros is good for the homos. 

[travelingbutthole]

I have a brother who lives in another state.  One time he came to CA to visit me and he accompanied me and my boyfriend to the mall downtown.  My boyfriend and I had been together for four years.  This was in a college town (Sonoma State University),  There was a street fair/farmer's market going on.  A guy was walking around and passing out condoms to all of the younger people.

 

He approached us and offered us condoms.  My brother, who is married, told him that he does not need a condom and he told the guy to give it to me and my boyfriend.  I blurted out that we don't use condoms.  My brother's eyes almost came out of his head and he looked as if he was going to faint.

 

Then I posed the question to him, "why is it okay for a heterosexual couple who has been together for a long time to have sex without a condom, but it is not okay for gay couple to do the same thing?"  Of course he response was, "What about HIV?"  My response was that neither one of us has it, so why would we need to use a condom?

 

There was about 2 minutes of total silence while that information was processing in his head.  He was motionless.  Then I guess it finally clicked.  What's good for the heteros is good for the homos. 

 

 

Thats adorable.

If anything it was your brother who needed the condom because you don't have to think about avoiding pregnancy.

[bberik]

My friends don't know. Some of my friends are condom nazis, so I don't tell. But then, I also don't fuck friends, so they don't need to know.

[averageslut48]

It is not a secret, that I am gay. Everybody around me knows it. But i don´t talk about my sex life in detail to friends and relatives. So it is not necessary to tell them, that I am a barebacker.

[PhoenixGeoff]

I'm out at work. My co-workers generally choose to ignore my orientation, which is fine; I prefer to be judged positively or negatively based on my performance rather than some irrelevant trait like being white or gay or whatever. So needless to say, how active my sex life is doesn't really come up.

As for my family, my parents have received a few clues over the years about how sexually active I am. To the extent they've said anything at all, they've expressed vague disapproval. But for the most part, I think think they're content, as I am, to leave that part of my life unspoken.

As for gay friends, I have no trouble showing my face or first name on sites like these. I'm pretty up front about my barebacking preferences and my HIV status. My FWBs are very similar in outlook to me. Other men with similar tastes can and do approach me based on that. Anyone else who sees me on online gay sites and who is less promiscuous or who prefers condom use knows where they stand with me. I've never had anyone hold it against me, which is as it should be.

[bbzh]

Do your family or friends know about your sex life to the point of them know you fuck bare and how do you manage that?

 

I find this is the type of stuff younger/inexperienced guys tend to worry about. That's not a read or a diss by the way. I just find that once a man reaches a certain age, family and friends tend to show a lot more respect and don't ask such personal questions.

 

If someone did try me like that, I'd ask "Why do you need to know that?"

That usually ends that conversation right there and gives the person ample warning that they are about to get verbally chin-checked.

 

And whenever I am tempted to talk about such personal things with people, I usually ask myself, "Why do I need to tell that and what could they do with that information?" 

 

You can't untell people something once you've told them.

[PhoenixGeoff]

If someone did try me like that, I'd ask "Why do you need to know that?"

That usually ends that conversation right there and gives the person ample warning that they are about to get verbally chin-checked.

Well, sometimes people just are genuinely curious. For people like that, I'll answer honestly, but pretty generally, without all of the gory details.

And once in a blue moon, especially in a private one-on-one conversation, questions like that might be a prelude to a coming-out of sorts.

On the other hand, some people are just judgmental or vindictive or trying to score points off you in front of others. Those people get shut down.

It's pretty easy to tell the difference between the three, and if I can't tell, I find it easier not to assume malice.

But the overwhelming majority of people really don't give a damn and aren't the least bit interested in your sex life.