Are you capable of monogamy?

[truepig]

Capable - NO. Consider myself very fortunate, I have an awesome partner (14 yrs)  that loves me unconditionally and is still okay with me playing with other guys. When we first got together we did 3 ways and groups, but he tired of those. He's 13 yrs older than I am, but understands my need for as much cock and cum as I can get. I don't flaunt my sex life in his face, I kiss him goodbye and tell him I love him every time before I leave the house to meet another guy.  I'm also more of an extreme kink player, where as he is more of a vanilla. It's a good thing he allows me to play, I would have cheated on him otherwise. Makes it much easier that everything is up front and I don't have to sneak around. 

[tallslenderguy]

i think this is a great question and appreciate all the answers!! i find myself mostly nodding and relating to the answers FelchingPisser and sthrnguy wrote.

Coming from a deeply religious and 'traditional' background that took 'monogamy' beyond sexuality,  i have become very grateful for my sexual orientation because the realities of who and how i am have taught me to question the status quo and pretty much freed me from their constraints. 

To me, the notion that any one person can be everything the other person needs or wants was born in the hetero world and was perpetuated by Disney. Given the divorce rate, i'd say there is good reason to question the idea.  i think a lot of couples split because instead of making allowances for each to get what they need from someone who wants to give it, instead the expectation that each will become what the other needs/wants? In my experience, that is a formula for frustration and resentment and turns the relationship into quid pro quo.

On the other hand, i could see myself in a relationship like sthrnguy, where if each of our make up was very complimentary of each others, i can see some advantages. For instance, depth of kink interaction. 

[Guest takingdeepanal]

17 hours ago, justsexnowatl said:

Capable = yes

Willing = NO

I don't "need" super frequent sex, but I love it pretty sleazy which pretty much always wears off with the same partner.  I had one partner for 3 years, and we had crazy hot sex the whole time, but there were too many other issues   We tried a 3way a few times, but it didn't go that great, and it was actually hotter just the two of us (sling up, gear on, toys out, beers out for piss swap, and raw from date 1.  At this point though, I know if someone said they wanted monogamy on an early date that would be a killer for me.  I'd rather date a slut that has reg fuckbuds for sharing and gets off whoring around together or coming home with a sloppy hole for me to worship and breed

I'd be more than happy to come home to you every night with a sloppy hole for you to continually breed!

[Davidc]

No,I’m just a slag 

[bihairy]

No. I have an open relationship now and couldn't do it.  Love the sex too much.

[Cumfilledbottomboi]

I haven’t yet but know I could. But sex is just too much fun.

[btm2bbred]

Right now I still enjoy the hunt for new Top guys to breed my hole and own my ass .    It would be hard for me to give that adventurous aspect of sex up.   While there is always the chance that a random hookup will be a dud, there are far more times when the sex has been electric, and fulfilling and great!

As I get older, I can envision the day when I might want to settle down, though.     One of my fuckbuds who I get to enjoy a few times a year would be ideal for me......but maybe I would not be ideal for him.    

[FelchingPisser]

Maybe I need to expand my statement above.  I am not against relationships.  I had a great one (30 years, ending only in his death.)  I just think the best relationships I see around me recognize, even embrace, that we are sexual beings who love variety.  I have always been able to separate love and sex.  I had a man who complimented me in dozens of ways, but the sex was vanilla and soon rather rote.  Instead of giving up all the ways we were an incredible unit of support for each other, we simply opened the relationship.   We did men together and alone.  I loved watching him have sex.  He loved watching me fuck other men.  Our jobs often kept us in different cities.  Reporting our sex lives to each other kept us talking, sharing and hot to re-unite and have fun.

While I am not actively looking for a long term partner for the second half of my life, I wouldn't say no to one if it happened.  I can certainly see myself living with a cum dump who is free to go and get his hole loaded.  Is it too much to ask that he wake me up when he comes home by sitting on my face and letting me felch it out of him?  I promise he'd get a fresh load to replace it....

[Guest BZcumdump]

Thanks everyone to responding with your experiences.  I learned some stuff here, but mostly it reaffirmed for me why I am the way I am.    I look at things just a little different.   We like different foods, different forms of entertainment, different drinks, different clothes, relationships with different types of people.   If we applied the concept of monogamy to everyday life, our lives would be so boring.   Eatin, drinking, wearing, the same things everyday.  Staying with one job our entire life.   What makes life interesting is variety in all aspects of our lives, taking calculated risks, and evolving.   So why should our sex life be any different.  We’ve been conditioned to make it synonymous with love and commitment, when really sex is nothing more than an animal instinct and to fill our hunger.   I met my companion 20 years ago.  We were lovers the first two years and decided to just be no sexual companions.   We are fully committed to each other in a relationship void of sex.   I trust him with my life as does he.  Couldn’t love him more.   But our close bond has nothing to do with sex.   We each do our own thins and neither cares, but it’s nice to have a companion in my life.   It’s really ideal.   Total freedom, but having someone to travel with, go to dinner, movies, clubs, etc.    My thought is that monogamy is unnatural.   It’s two people trying to force themselves into a box with sexual intimacy that almost always dissipates with time, but with no options for a couple left to feel frustrated all for some ideal of monogamy.   People confuse love,and sex.  You may fall in love with someone you have sex with, but if it’s true love, it is independent of the sex.  It just so happens you have dual,chemistry.   Most people, especially men with men, don’t relate sex with love.   I’ve had at least a few thousand sex partners but yet have only loved 2 men throughout my life.   So many straight people will continue to think gay people are just a bunch of sex addicts.   Is it really sex addiction or sexual pleasure.  The only thing that makes me worried is the sti’s I have to deal with.  Without sti’s I would feel 100% liberated and have sex with as many men as possible, as there is no better pleasure.  There would be no guilt that is classically linked to addiction.  There would only be a freedom knowing I can fully explore my sexual urges with like-minded men without consequence.   

[Guest BBBoyfromTN]

I think the uniqueness and difference of each guy isn't what I enjoy which predisposes me to say I'm probably not inclined towards monogamy. In high school I tried "dating" of sorts or being committed and monogamous but always wound up cheating and lying, which I hated myself for doing. I tried honesty but most guys that age didn't want to be with sluts or just wanted a hole to fuck, so I wound up being the hole to fuck. That's pretty much who I still am. I've had guys who've wanted to date me but I just can't do that...it's just not me.

[Guest TWINKFAGGOTPUSSY]

Nah not at all lol I just got out of a 3 year relationship. Was one of the Last times too that I will ever top a partner. Cuz during the relationship, my cravings to be a cum whore faggot dump did not go away. So at times, i would seek out men to breed my hole behind his back. It got WAY too boring & stale being with one person & even in a steady relationship, my urges to wander off and be used and abused by strangers NEVER went away and it never will. Faggot cunts should not be monogamous at there are hundreds of men looking to pump and dump fag ass like mine. And once or twice my ex DID recommend our relationship being open with me being fucked by whomever i wanted, but i said No. I didnt want him to know and i GOT OFF being a cheating faggot whore.

 

Edited August 12, 2018 by TWINKFAGGOTPUSSY

[Guest TWINKFAGGOTPUSSY]

I remember back in the day when i was in the closet, dating girls and telling people i was straight. The longest i was with a female partner was a year (back in 2009 i think). I did feel as if i loved her, but when we werent around each other, i did take cock in my ass and mouth. Kinda turned me on that my GF didn't know i liked being used as PUSSY, probably moreso than she did. My advice dont be monogamous and dont hide your urges in if u want to be a faggot whore.

Edited August 12, 2018 by TWINKFAGGOTPUSSY

[fuckh0le]

i get off on being a cheating faggot, so not only do i think i don't deserve to be in a "monogamous", but i cant speak for everyone else being niche, bc i have to have a bf to cheat

[Tinybl]

I used to think monogamy was for me.  I despised unfaithful cheaters, but after many years with my husband I got bored.

I answered a Craigslist ad one time and I was hopelessly hooked!  It took me a few more years to answer another one because I struggled emotionally with my filthy betrayal, but I wanted I everyday.  

Now I know I could never be monogamous.  

[Poz-Mcr]

I'd like to think I am capable of monogamy, but I know it could only ever be with a guy that I was truly, madly, deeply, inescapably head of heels for. However, I also know in that situation I would likely a) smother him completely and make him run or b) be insanely jealous and make him run. On the flip side, history/experience has taught me that the moment I start to doubt a partners commitment to monogamy (on the understanding that it was supposed to be monogamy) then I start thinking that I may as well cheat if he is likely to be cheating on me!

So, I guess I should learn and be honest with myself that I'm probably not capable of monogamy and if, and when, I do meet a significant other again (not holding my breath) it'll probably be best to have some form of open relationship.