Age of concent

[Truversebb]

I’ve done some limited research on this topic and it seems that in plenty of places it’s fine for an adult to legally have sex with someone under the age of 18. If so what is the big hang up with needing to be 18 everywhere?

[salerio]

5 hours ago, Truversebb said:

I’ve done some limited research on this topic and it seems that in plenty of places it’s fine for an adult to legally have sex with someone under the age of 18. If so what is the big hang up with needing to be 18 everywhere?

16 in the UK

14 in Austria, Germany, Hungary, Italy, Portugal

[Morningglorie]

42 minutes ago, salerio said:

16 in the UK

14 in Austria, Germany, Hungary, Italy, Portugal

I didn't know that....wow. Thanks

[Guest CuriousDallas]

I feel like I’m in my Business Law class now...it comes from English Common Law and the age at which you are able to enter into legally binding agreements as well as the age of majority (versus the age of minority). Eighteen is viewed as this arbitrary age at which you’re supposed to be magically responsible enough to do things that adults can do. You may be physically capable of sex under 18 but you’re not fully aware of the ramifications until you’re 18, which is why churches and schools push the whole abstinence BS. It varies by state in the US...in Texas it’s 17 but you can’t send nudity to them and you can’t use online to hookup with them (Texas has a LOT of laws) but in other states it’s 16 or 15. It’s a touchy subject in the US as they’ve tightened up sex laws a lot lately and if you’re messing with a kid under 18 you could easily break the law and not know it.

having been under 18 very recently I hated the fucking consent laws as it made hooking up way harder than it needed to be. I didn’t like being a “sex criminal” because of what I wanted sexually and didn’t want the guys I got with getting labeled that way. I hated that a guy who got with me could be legally ruled a sexual predator and have his life ruined. All of that pushes underaged kids into risky behavior or causes emotional damage as they stifle their desires. I’m probably not wording it as eloquently as others but trust me, it causes damage you can’t begin to imagine.

[tallslenderguy]

1 hour ago, CuriousDallas said:

I feel like I’m in my Business Law class now...it comes from English Common Law and the age at which you are able to enter into legally binding agreements as well as the age of majority (versus the age of minority). Eighteen is viewed as this arbitrary age at which you’re supposed to be magically responsible enough to do things that adults can do. You may be physically capable of sex under 18 but you’re not fully aware of the ramifications until you’re 18, which is why churches and schools push the whole abstinence BS. It varies by state in the US...in Texas it’s 17 but you can’t send nudity to them and you can’t use online to hookup with them (Texas has a LOT of laws) but in other states it’s 16 or 15. It’s a touchy subject in the US as they’ve tightened up sex laws a lot lately and if you’re messing with a kid under 18 you could easily break the law and not know it.

having been under 18 very recently I hated the fucking consent laws as it made hooking up way harder than it needed to be. I didn’t like being a “sex criminal” because of what I wanted sexually and didn’t want the guys I got with getting labeled that way. I hated that a guy who got with me could be legally ruled a sexual predator and have his life ruined. All of that pushes underaged kids into risky behavior or causes emotional damage as they stifle their desires. I’m probably not wording it as eloquently as others but trust me, it causes damage you can’t begin to imagine.

i think you worded this very well. It's a tricky and complex subject.  Coming from a religious background (which i am no longer a part of), i find it ironic that the church folk that push this sort of stuff are largely hypocritical.  They push abstinence, which results in them pushing marriages that often happen before people are ready to make that kind of commitment because it's the only way they can get sex.  Another funny factoid is back at the time Jesus was purportedly born it was common for women to be "betrothed" at age 14 or so. Mary was likely that age when "God" impregnated her, which by US law (heavily influenced by religion), would make "God" a sexual predator and pedophile. 

Religion aside, i still think this is a complex subject.  i think if everyone had a "do no harm" outlook, age would not be the deciding factor, but competence, which is a whole lot more individual. Some guys are more mentally and emotionally competent at 15 than other guys are at 45.  One would hope that the experience that comes with age would equip one, but experience is not the only factor of maturity.  

Generally speaking, i think society has to set an age of consent because people are not individually, universally, responsible. i.e., there are adults who would prey on younger kids and there are laws in place to try and protect those kids.  It doesn't fit all people, but what is the alternative?

[blackrobe]

In my home country, Australia, the age of consent is generally 16 years old:

Quote

The age of consent is 16 years of age in the Australian Capital Territory, New South Wales, Northern Territory, Queensland, Victoria and Western Australia. In Tasmania and South Australia the age of consent is 17 years of age. The age of consent for sexual interactions is 16 years.

They also allow young people undergoing sexual development to have sex with each other at younger ages.

[Pozlover1]

It’s 16 in Kentucky.
Two factors In every State and the Federal Government are:

like speed limits are set at the lowest common denominator (trucks in this case) most other laws are also set that way. 
 

once the subject comes up before any legislature, they are scared NOT to vote for tougher laws about drugs, liquor, sex, etc., usually to stop any suspicion about their own misdeeds, which are quite prolific. 

Edited September 29, 2019 by Pozlover1

[drscorpio]

Moderator's Note: rawTOP has decided to set the age for discussion on this site to be 18 out of abundance of caution. There have been a lot of legislative efforts to crack down on online activities in the USA in the last few years. 

[Guest SecretCumWhore]

Understood Scorpio. I’d have to agree for what CuriousDallas said.  From my own personal experience, I’d have to say when the age of consent comes into play and someone cannot find a sexual partner. They find other avenues and more risky situations to experience it, which was my case. Personally I think age of consent laws should be redone, albeit carefully. I am not a legal professional so the verbiage would be way too tough to seem plausible for ‘good order and discipline’ of society and ‘empowerment’ of ones own body to experience a natural thing. 

- Texas smoking laws moved to 21, yet HS students are buying Juul’s online or through friends and getting e-liquid ‘off the market’... causing lung cancer quickly for the unregulated and wishy washy stuff in it. Compared to stuff stored in stores. 

- Same could be said for sexual activity. 

[BlindRawFucker1]

I could be mistaken, but this topic was discussed years ago on here.

 

During that discussion, it was stated that a U.S. citizen could be prosecuted in the U.S. for what he/she legally did in another country, with someone who is considered underaged here.

[Guest BritBottom]

I have a lot of residual resentment, if not downright anger about the effect of the ‘age of consent’ and how it impacted my life.

Skip the italics if history bores you …….

In the UK  - the history for homosexual sex is as follows:

1553, English law identified anal sex as an offence punishable by hanging as a result of the Buggery Act .

1861, Section 61 of the Offences against the Person Act  removed the death penalty for homosexuality, male homosexual acts were punishable by imprisonment.

1885, extended the laws regarding homosexuality to include any kind of sexual activity between males. Lesbians were never acknowledged or targeted by legislation because Queen Victoria denied such things happened.

1967, The male homosexual age of consent in the United Kingdom was set at 21 in the Sexual Offences Act of 1967.  It maintained general prohibitions on buggery and indecency between men, but provided for a limited decriminalisation of homosexual acts where three conditions were fulfilled: 1) the act had to be consensual, 2) the act had to take place in private and 3) the act could involve only people that had attained the age of 21. This was a higher age of consent than that for heterosexual acts, which was set at 16. Further, "in private" limited participation in an act to two people. This condition was interpreted strictly by the courts, which took it to exclude acts taking place in a room in a hotel, for example, and in private homes where a third person was present (even if that person was in a different room). 1994, It was lowered to 18 in the Criminal Justice and Public Order Act 1994

2000, It was lowered to 16 in England and Scotland in the Sexual Offences (Amendment) Act of 2000 (harmonising with the straight age of consent).  This was because the European Commission of Human Rights in its decision of 1 July 1997., Articles 8 and 14 of the European Convention on Human Rights were violated by a discriminatory age of consent, on the ground that there was no objective and reasonable justification for maintaining a higher minimum age for male homosexual acts.

2003, Under the Sexual Offences Act 2003. The specific restrictions from the 1967 Act were removed and harmonised with those for heterosexuals. Regulations were introduced for discrimination protections on sexual orientation in employment on 1 December 2003)

 2008 extended protections to cover discrimination in goods, facilities and services

Bearing in mind I hit puberty at 10 and was sexually active in increasing increments from 11 Most of my sexual activity was illegal under English Law:

Between 1960 to 1967 my sexual nature was effectively illegal.

Between 1967 to 1981 all my sexual activity was illegal

Between 1981 to 2003 most of my sexual activity was illegal

In effect I became an accomplished criminal for no other reason than my sexual orientation and the fact that I chose to act upon it. Fortunately, the law never caught up with me, though I recall a few near misses.

I should make it clear I was never forced or coerced to do anything in my youth or childhood, everything I did was because was because I was a horny little bastard.  I was terrified of being found out, as where those I went with. Most of those I went with were older (by choice), I sought them out, encouraged them and actively participated – they could have gone to prison because of me (it never occurred to me that I should be ashamed of that until I wrote this).  

The culture I grew up in meant that if (and it happened more than once) a group of thugs beat me up because I was in or near a known cruising spot, or if I had been blackmailed, I daren’t report it. The police hunted us, an easy target and an easy conviction, and often a beating along the way.

The effect on my life of the ‘age of consent’ has been direct and very negative. It encouraged low self-esteem, internalised homophobia, and years of fear – all that likely restricted me in other ways. I’m left with a lasting resentment for the damage done. From my perspective I was the victim of the law and society because of the law and not the men who indulged my desires.

As to whether I was old enough to consent, well I did, despite the law, despite the societal culture of hatred, and despite the potential risks – many of which I was wholly ignorant of.

In terms of contract law it is not the same in the UK, the age for non-voidable contracts is 18, and the universal age of consent is 16. It is notable that the Age for criminal responsibility is 10.

I agree with comments such as: “Some guys are more mentally and emotionally competent at 15 than other guys are at 45” and “experience is not the only factor of maturity”.  But maturity and experience are not the only factors because the sexual urges are primal and strongest at puberty. Few of us apply a list of pro’s & cons or even risks in sexual matters. It not like buying a house or a car or applying for a job. It boils down to “I wanna fuck, who’ll let me”, and even more so for the young.

The young have little experience in controlling emotional and sexual urges, most adults do too. They are also most at risk from ignorance of consequences, danger, coercion, predators, pregnancy and and disease.

I don’t believe in the ‘innocence of childhood’ in the sense that adults fool themselves that it lasts beyond puberty if that long. Some are stupid enough to think that ignorance prolongs it. Kids are by nature, self-obsessed, manipulative and deceitful.

Innocence is lack of guilt. As a kid, I and my contemporaries did nothing but revel the forbidden and once the hormones kicked in anything sexual was the most exciting.  it was naughty dirty sexual stuff and it stimulated that wonderful feeling in our loins as a consequent they were guilty, not innocent, pleasures and never spoken of with unsuspecting adults.

I think that the best protection is always knowledge – the taboos on sex education are ludicrous, it is restricting essential information for life, promoting ignorance and exposing the young to risk and danger. I had parents who answered questions factually and based on my ability to understand. I was lucky my mother was a nurse, my innocent direct question about why she didn’t have a cock was answered simply and factually and each subsequent question that naturally followed. I never dared ask why I wanted to play with cocks and not vaginas later for obvious reasons.

I am an atheist; to me most religion is as factual as Santa Claus.  Religion was long ago hijacked a means of political power and control – an unsubstantiated promise for blind obedience, usually promulgated by hypocrites. For that reason I discount it.

To me the word morality is badly abused, especially by religion, politicians, lawyers and hypocrites. it is defined as “a set of personal or social standards for good or bad behaviour and character”.  Most of us pick and choose our own rules of conduct, especially on this site. The "do no harm" concept already expressed by tallslenderguy is about the best expression of a personal morality I could conceive – ironically, despite my atheism, I tend to base mine on “do unto others….” allowing me the option of retaliation. Sadly we live in world where some take no regard of others in taking what they want. Any morality has to take that reality into account and protect ourselves against them.

Existing age of consents may exist, but the reality is they do not stop the activity and sometimes the young weaponise them, making accusations for their own ends. The concept of the victim can be complex. The age of consent can actively work against protecting the young, as in my own experience.

I am not attracted by young men, my post is about the age of consent impacted me not a desire to access the young and  I have nothing but contempt for those who seek to actively exploit others sexually or otherwise. Where the subject is naive, vulnerable, weak or a child that engenders an intense reaction.

The best I can come up with as an age of consent is to work from the individual age of puberty, coupled with a full factual unbiased sex education – teach them what they need to know to deal with themselves each other, risks and society – build self-confidence and esteem and support them in finding their own way without judgement or stigma and let them grow into their own sexuality at their own pace. Support that by strong penalties for deliberate physical and mental harm and abuse, the older the perpetrator the higher the penalty should be.

I know, it’s utopia and I’m just a naive idealist. I’d like to have grown up in a world where I could have enjoyed that first cock up my ass when I was 15, and all the others that followed for many years, without being a criminal and without the fear etc that surrounded it. 

My opinion counts for nothing in the real world, but, I can dream can’t I?