How to advice?

[Guest carstenPOZ]

Hi guys: often I have guys on PreP telling me that they find the PreP concept wrong: that PreP is a constant reminder of the RISKS with bareback sex and thereby diminishing their sex life quality.

I always reply that I can relate to them and that my advice always will be: STOP PREP treatment right away and enjoy sex as its supposed to be: all uncomplicated and all GENUINE!

Do you agree with my advice? or should I rather go thru pros and cons on a more health-care orientated strategy? Im a doc myself, but mostly Im a gay man with my definitions of a healthy sex life

[Guest]

I find the opposite, PrEP frees me (to a large degree) from those fears, allows me to manage my risks to a level I am comfortable with, and has dramatically improved and increased my sex life (before covid) while reducing my anxiety and feelings of guilt that used to accompany bareback sex (no doubt guilt caused by strict Christian upbringing). 

But I guess it depends what you want PrEP for, what you want from sex, why you bareback, and how you view your own personal risk management? 

If you're giving them advice as a doctor, of course pros and cons and the choice is theirs. If giving advice as a gay man then it's up to you, telling their your perspective and how you felt is perfectly valid, and it may or may not also be the right choice for them. But that's on them to choose. At least PrEP gives them the opportunity to generally make that choice themselves rather than chance deciding for them. 

[bareback-flipflop]

6 hours ago, TheMoreTheMerrier said:

I find the opposite, PrEP frees me (to a large degree) from those fears, allows me to manage my risks to a level I am comfortable with, and has dramatically improved and increased my sex life (before covid) while reducing my anxiety and feelings of guilt that used to accompany bareback sex (no doubt guilt caused by strict Christian upbringing). 

But I guess it depends what you want PrEP for, what you want from sex, why you bareback, and how you view your own personal risk management? 

If you're giving them advice as a doctor, of course pros and cons and the choice is theirs. If giving advice as a gay man then it's up to you, telling their your perspective and how you felt is perfectly valid, and it may or may not also be the right choice for them. But that's on them to choose. At least PrEP gives them the opportunity to generally make that choice themselves rather than chance deciding for them. 

Totally agreed. I don’t understand the people who feel because PreP makes their sex life worse. PreP means for me freedom. I can live my life without limits. Being barebacker is the essence of my sexuality. Without PreP, I would have to choose between having sex with condome or barebacking with continuously fear from HIV. 
However, if someone feel the opposite, they can leave PreP, especially if they don’t mind becoming sick. 

[BootmanLA]

11 hours ago, carstenPOZ said:

Hi guys: often I have guys on PreP telling me that they find the PreP concept wrong: that PreP is a constant reminder of the RISKS with bareback sex and thereby diminishing their sex life quality.

I always reply that I can relate to them and that my advice always will be: STOP PREP treatment right away and enjoy sex as its supposed to be: all uncomplicated and all GENUINE!

Do you agree with my advice? or should I rather go thru pros and cons on a more health-care orientated strategy? Im a doc myself, but mostly Im a gay man with my definitions of a healthy sex life

I find it difficult to believe that an actual medical doctor would advise to people to have unprotected sex without PrEP.

Do you also advise them to skydive without a parachute, to scuba dive without an oxygen tank, or to drive without seat belts?

I call bullshit. 

[1000GUYS]

OMG shut up... are you a doctor?? really?? 

I think that PrEP should be seen as "gay men pill", just like birth control... PrEP should be spread and available to everyone who wants to keep safe from a disease such HIV/AIDS.

I hate when people judge PrEP users as slut truvada whore... wake up! Thats the ONLY way you can keep YOU safe from HIV, condoms can break and u get infected, period

[viking8x6]

I think it would be more ethical to tell people your views of the pros and cons. That said, including your views about the psychological and quality-of-life components of the pros and cons, as well as the medical ones, would not be unreasonable. After all, PrEP is a "lifestyle drug" - people don't take it to cure any disease, so it's only appropriate to compare it to the alternative approaches to managing the risks of sex.

Not everyone has the same psychological reaction to the reality of taking a drug regularly to ameliorate one particular risk of an optional (though highly desirable) activity. Personally, I find that PrEP does not change my perception of the risk of bare sex, but it does lower that risk to a level with which I'm comfortable. This is from the point of view where my sexual relations have been bare almost all the time for nearly 20 years now, and those risks have manifested more than once... though in truth, they also did a time or two before all the sex was bare, which is perhaps among the more educational experiences I've had.

 

Edited October 2, 2020 by viking8x6