downtownswallow Posted April 17, 2021 Report Posted April 17, 2021 I'm a Submissive Bottom and won't take a cock in a condom....raw only. A long term friend has recently expressed an interest in us becoming fuck buddies. Aside from possibly causing harm to our friendship, his cock is really large....bigger than any I've ever take. I'd appreciate advice on how I can be ready without ending up in great pain or torn open. I do not enjoy painful sex....never have....and don't think my friend would be happy if he thinks I've been hurt by him. 1
BlondBttm Posted April 17, 2021 Report Posted April 17, 2021 It's all about you putting yourself in the right receptive mindset...so that you can relax and open up for Him... sounds like you already know and can trust him to not hurt you, so that should help you be able to relax. Take it slow, and communicate with Him. You need to be able to let go of your fear that He will rip or tear you - that comes from the bottom resisting...so alleviate your fear, trust Him not to hurt you and relax and enjoy! 2 1
NLbear Posted April 18, 2021 Report Posted April 18, 2021 I don't think it will hurt your friendship. It actually would add another layer to it. After all it was he who expressed the wish to have sex with you. It would be different if you lured him into having sex when he really didn't want that. It may change the friendship because you will also be interacting with him on a sexual level. But that is a good thing I think. As for him being bigger than you're used to. Exactly because you are friends he will be careful not to hurt you. Just relax abd take things slow. It will fit! 1 1
ErosWired Posted April 18, 2021 Report Posted April 18, 2021 The same advice applies in preparing yourself to be able to take any large cock - practice. Stretch yourself over time with plugs or dildoes, and condition your body to perform the task. And poppers, to relax your involuntary muscle contractions. The advice to put yourself in the right mindset isn’t bad advice, but thinking isn’t all it takes. You can put yourself in a mindset to lift an Olympic-level weight, but if you try it without training for it, you won’t succeed. 1
LetsPOZBreed Posted April 18, 2021 Report Posted April 18, 2021 I would invest in a dildo or two (if you haven't already). Certainly has helped me on occasion. And as some of the advice states above, practice...practice...practice. You want to be in the right mindset for your body to allow a large top inside you comfortably. Poppers helps, as will lots of lube. Be honest with your partner to go in gentle; you can work up the pace as you get more accustomed to having him inside you. 1
Guest Posted April 21, 2021 Report Posted April 21, 2021 Agree with practice, but also, just take it. If you are going to be a proper bottom, you need to take a cock no matter what. Yes, the big ones can hurt, but it's about the top, not you.
backdoorjimmy Posted April 21, 2021 Report Posted April 21, 2021 On 4/17/2021 at 12:08 PM, downtownswallow said: I'm a Submissive Bottom and won't take a cock in a condom....raw only. A long term friend has recently expressed an interest in us becoming fuck buddies. Aside from possibly causing harm to our friendship, his cock is really large....bigger than any I've ever take. I'd appreciate advice on how I can be ready without ending up in great pain or torn open. I do not enjoy painful sex....never have....and don't think my friend would be happy if he thinks I've been hurt by him. Like others have said, practice and dildos are important. So is your mood. Spend some time sucking it and grinding your hole against it so you can enjoy it and get used to his size. While you're doing that try to imagine yourself riding his dick and how good it's going to feel. I don't use poppers but you might want to. Make sure you use as much lube as you need. Don't worry about making a mess with lube. It's better than making a mess with blood from not using enough lube. It doesn't have to be painful, but if it's uncomfortable at first that's normal. Just take your time and have him rest inside you while your muscles calm down and your ass relaxes. When you're ready for him to thrust, you'll know. It should be incredible and you should both enjoy yourselves.
BootmanLA Posted April 22, 2021 Report Posted April 22, 2021 On 4/21/2021 at 8:25 AM, DannyBoyCMH said: Agree with practice, but also, just take it. If you are going to be a proper bottom, you need to take a cock no matter what. Yes, the big ones can hurt, but it's about the top, not you. That's true for groveling, submissive, no-self-esteem bottoms, sure. It's not true for all bottoms and there's no rule designating "proper" bottoms as the ones who'll take anything no matter what. 2 1
ErosWired Posted April 23, 2021 Report Posted April 23, 2021 (edited) 6 hours ago, BootmanLA said: That's true for groveling, submissive, no-self-esteem bottoms, sure. It's not true for all bottoms and there's no rule designating "proper" bottoms as the ones who'll take anything no matter what. You’re letting your rhetoric run away with you. You could easily have pointed out that some bottoms don’t take such an absolute view without disparaging those who do. There may be no rule designating what “proper” bottoms are or do, but neither is there any metric classifying submissive bottoms as “groveling, no self-esteem”. I grovel for no one and my self-esteem is just fine thank you very much, yet I agree that a bottom who claims to offer any sort of quality service had better be willing and able to take cock. Not all bottoms are alike; some are very self-oriented, others are service-oriented. Comparing the two types in terms of what makes a “true” bottom is pointless - their motivations are fundamentally different. The similarity they share, however, is that they both ultimately have to take it up the ass. In terms of the OP’s question, several respondents have advised that having the right mindset is key to successfully doing so. @DannyBoyCMH’s comment is nothing more than an expounding upon such a mindset, from someone with considerable experience taking cock. Sometimes, the difference between a positive and a negative experience in taking a cock boils down to just deciding you’re going to take it one way or the other - that is, deciding that failure is not going to be one of your options. And there are rewards. Last week my current regular Top was giving me a very professional railing after a two-week hiatus, super-enjoying himself, going at me with all kinds of angles to the point that it felt like he was excavating a new cavity inside my abdomen. After a bit, it hurt. I had to decide whether I was going to ask him to curtail his pleasure, or just take it. He had such a look of bliss on his face that it wasn’t much of a decision; I just relaxed my insides and took it. When he was done, he told me how much he loved fucking me, and what made it really good for him, he told me, was that I was able “to just take it.” It’s why he keeps calling me back for more. Edited April 23, 2021 by ErosWired
verslut Posted April 23, 2021 Report Posted April 23, 2021 On 4/21/2021 at 9:25 AM, DannyBoyCMH said: Agree with practice, but also, just take it. If you are going to be a proper bottom, you need to take a cock no matter what. Yes, the big ones can hurt, but it's about the top, not you. You're blunt but I definitely agree. I make sure my bottom is enjoying his pounding and I'll go slow to ease in. But I'm not gonna be a regular fuck bud with a guy who can't take my dick. 2
hornybrownbottom Posted April 23, 2021 Report Posted April 23, 2021 I have come to realize that if I am really horny or turned on, I can take any size cock so long as it is raw. So maybe that? 1
Ocelot2000 Posted April 23, 2021 Report Posted April 23, 2021 Lay back, take a hit of poppers and think of England!
Guest Posted April 23, 2021 Report Posted April 23, 2021 7 hours ago, verslut said: You're blunt but I definitely agree. I make sure my bottom is enjoying his pounding and I'll go slow to ease in. But I'm not gonna be a regular fuck bud with a guy who can't take my dick. I just like to be direct and tell it like it is, but as always, it's my perspective. It's built upon a lot of experience at this point. 🙂 I also don't need paragraphs and paragraphs to explain. Nobody wants to read that. 🙂
Pozguyinchi Posted April 23, 2021 Report Posted April 23, 2021 I agree with everything that has been said. Although it has been many years since I have been challenged with taking a big cock, I have done all of the things mentioned in previous posts. Relaxation, toys, poppers. They all help. I think it’s a mindset mostly. I find that before a gang bang I like to smoke weed. It helps get my body relaxed.
Warmnsalty Posted April 23, 2021 Report Posted April 23, 2021 Practice Practice Practice The biggest real cock I've taken is 10" long, not sure about thickness. It happened during a threesome. I went to a married buddy's house, he had a friend there, Mr 10" My buddy was 7, he fucked me first that got me ready for Mr. Big. We have a decent selection of dildos that I use regularly when I can't find real cock. My usual routine is to start with a small one and work up to the big one I want on any given day. Our biggest is this beauty, 11" insert length, 8.5" around it fills me up nicely LOL 1
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