Slut shamed for being a proud barebacker!

[tallslenderguy]

14 minutes ago, akula said:

...unless you wrap it when you suck it everything you can catch while barebacking you can catch sucking raw cock. 

i think this is a great point!! i was religious and married (to a woman) for many years, and i struggled with cheating. Sex was my only affirmation as a gay guy, it was a mess for me. Anyway, i actually swore off getting sucked when i was married because it seemed that was the only way i got STI's. i have never gotten anything except HIV from getting barebacked, and i had had easily 1000's of cocks in my ass prior to becoming poz ( i was lucky). But it seemed  like every time i got sucked, i'd get chlamydia or gonorrhea. Pretty much total bottom for years now, so my penis isn't much used and i have not had an STI  in a long time either. Last STI was syphillis from the same Top who gave me HIV (i think) and that was 8 years ago now. 

Edited August 1, 2021 by tallslenderguy

[evilalex]

I used to worry about what other people thought of me, then I heard the quote "What other people think of you is none of your fucking business." and it resonated with me. Fuck em.

[tallslenderguy]

37 minutes ago, evilalex said:

I used to worry about what other people thought of me, then I heard the quote "What other people think of you is none of your fucking business." and it resonated with me. Fuck em.

wow, great quote !!

 

[NWUSHorny]

Personally I would just ignore them, I know I'm a slut.  If they are persistent you can block them.  My problem on the apps tend to be bug chasers, even though I'm a slut, I can't understand why you would intentionally want a disease or give one to someone, usually they take the hint that you aren't into their particular "thing".  I also figure if they are local and truly a slut they've probably already taken one of my loads.

[evilqueerpig]

My philosophy is...."If it ain't bareback, it ain't fuckin and it ain't happenin....and if you don't like it, go fuck yourself!"

[evilalex]

17 minutes ago, evilqueerpig said:

go fuck yourself!"

LIterally!

[Guest]

I generally find that guys split into two groups. Those that are never comfortable with their desires (of whatever type) and act under the shadow of shame. They literally hate themselves after they've succumbed and protest loudly that they are not sluts. Most memorably for me in a gay bar in Oxford years ago when waiting for a drink from the bar man, a guy literally stage whispered to his companion, "he's a right slut, always up the A40 doing anyone". I thought that was hysterical as he was right, but I turned him down as he was a right prissy queen!

The second type of guy is completely comfortable with his sexuality and therefore quite comfortable in his own skin. The type that comes up in a bar that opens up a conversation with, "not sure you remember me from the dark room in Birmingham", or will nod everytime we pass and chat over a beer. I was fucking one such guy, in a sunny riverside crusing area, and this bloke called over that we ought to be ashamed of ourselves for barebacking. We stopped, looked at each other, laughed, and carried on. The other one carried on wanking watching us which speaks volumes I reckon.

You can't blame that guy really as the heteronormative, Judeo Christian world view is hard to break out of

[StockingsBB]

The shamer has the issues not you. I am also a proud barebacking Btm. I want to be fucked and I want to take loads. I will support you 100 percent all day long. 

[DarkroomTaker]

Its ur life, ur Butt, your choice and ignore the fuckers. They are missing out on great sex not us. Btw ur ass is yummy, tell em that. 😆

[Guest]

On 7/31/2021 at 11:06 AM, RawUK said:

Now I'm beginning to wish I had said something but really didn't want to get into a slanging match with a blank profile that only says his age (26), location and that all he was into was sucking and that his sex preferences were Prep & Condoms - oh he also states Neg 4 Neg, hates unsafe sex and is turned off by bug chasers.

This profile reeks of insecurity and denial to me. Generally blank, most info about how he hates any whiff of an STD risk (although he refuses to go abstinent or monogamous if he's that scared), and the rest of the info about how he's relegated himself to foreplay through a latex barrier.

I've had a few shamers for all sorts. The occasional ""slut"" shamer who told me bare was gonna "get me" regardless of PrEP usage, and also lots of people who have asked if I was raped as a kid, rejected by a woman, want to touch up kids, etc. (I can wholly confirm none of this was, is, or ever will be the case). Some are trolls but a surprising number are legit bi/divorced guys with a very poor grasp of things.

My advice: these people aren't worth the effort. You could try to tell them "U=U" and "PrEP is more effective than condoms against HIV" and "Unprotected oral spreads just as much as unprotected anal", but this is all pretty common knowledge by this point. Unless they're literally going in for their first time and are a new profile, they've already seen the PSAs, heard the spiel, and been sent links to the research articles. There comes a point where they are just willfully ignorant, and people like that crossed that boundary long ago. Even if you ever got one to change their mind, guaranteed they sound like the most boring of people and would probably have the most wooden and passionless sex. Just block and move on - plenty more guys are actually fun, interesting, and informed.

[Guest]

On 7/31/2021 at 5:06 AM, RawUK said:

So I was on another site asking for recommendations for a hotel near Hampstead Heath, many posters say they are looking to take loads etc.

My post was as follows.....

Not been here in years and last time I was all about 'covering up'.
Been a proud barebacker for 6 years now and really want to find my inner cum dump slut!
Last time I was here I owned a car so it was easy to get here late at night but currently do not run a car.
Any suggestions for a nearby hotel that will be easy to get back to from the fuck tree say in twenty minutes walk or do guys use uber to get home?

So I received a couple of helpful replies giving good recommendations when this one appeared on the wall....

Wow a proud barebacker you say?... Are you proud of any other things that spread disease? 

I was so taken aback as I haven't been 'slut shamed' in years, and more used to the generally relaxed attitudes on here that I have to say I didn't respond.

Now I'm beginning to wish I had said something but really didn't want to get into a slanging match with a blank profile that only says his age (26), location and that all he was into was sucking and that his sex preferences were Prep & Condoms - oh he also states Neg 4 Neg, hates unsafe sex and is turned off by bug chasers.

Now as far as I'm concerned everyone is free to make their own choices - if you want to take Prep, take Prep, if you want to use condoms, use them, but don't lecture other people on your choices or shame others for theirs. 

What do you say / do if you're ever slut shamed on a forum or even in face to face situation?

Hopefully I've posted this in a suitable area? Moderators please feel free to move if I got the area wrong.

If you want to do it BB/RAW that is the choice you and your sexual partners make, and with serosorting a lot of poz guys only have sex with other poz men, either safe or if they do not care about getting or infecting others with other strains of HIV they do it raw/BB. This is not shaming to write the truth.

 

[Guest]

Has happened to me once at, of all places. the baths.  I nicely said thanks but I'm bareback only.  He mumbled something derogatory and left.  I felt pretty good that I was true to myself in public and with strangers.  I find that it is an advantage to be comfortable with who you are.  Usually that in itself attracts guys (you are the  person they want to be) and gets the condom guy to go raw.

[OzzieCumdumpster]

Man I ignore those sort of comments. And I can assure you I have had alot of them, especially since I have only ever barebacked since I was 13, even through the AIDS crisis I refused guys that wanted to cover up. It's your body like my body is my body and I'll do with it what I want. We all know the risks and accept them. This I would say is jealious that you love taking cock raw. HIV is treatable now and not a death sentence and most STI's are treatable, curable and manageable.

[Guest]

On 8/1/2021 at 7:51 PM, evilqueerpig said:

My philosophy is...."If it ain't bareback, it ain't fuckin and it ain't happenin....and if you don't like it, go fuck yourself!"

This is my philosophy as well. I've never had a condom in my ass and I never will. I've had guys show up to fuck me who knew I am bareback only, but thought I would go with a condom once they were there & had me all horny. I'd shock the fuck out of them when I'd tell them to leave. I was honest up front, don't lie to me then think I'll bend for you. Go home! 

[dweebx]

Younger guys are prudes. Don’t worry about it.