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Posted

Apologies if this has been covered previously or if this comes across as naive.

I'm new on the scene and exploring my bi-sexual feelings and, although I have been barebacking female hookers for several years (sex with the wife has dried up long ago), I have yet to have my first gay sexual experience.

 

My question is what, in your experience, is the HIV transmission risk with bare backing guys?  I'm not on PrEP (although this is someing that I'm considering) and have no ambition to get pozzed. 

When I first started barebacking females, I went through the initial stage (that most of us probably did) of worrying, after the event, if I had caught anything, especially HIV etc...

After a couple of negative test results (I have never had an STI), I got through that initial stage and I'm now happy to fuck any female raw and have no worries afterwards.

I know that raw sex with guys is riskier then with females and that being the bottom also carries a higher risk then being the top, but is it really worth going onto PrEP, in your experience?

- Are there guys, on this forum, who  are not on PrEP and have fucked raw, over a long period and still remained negative?

-   In order for me to guage, how many guys, on this forum, are taking PrEP?

- Finally, if I can ask, are there any guys who 'took the chance' (not on PrEP or before this was available) and ended up getting pozzed?

 

The reason that I'm asking is that I wish to get feed-back from this forum, who 'operate in the real world' (I know that asking a doctor will always get the response of safe sex etc).

When I finally go with guys, I wish to go bareback, since I hate condoms and wish to make an informed choice on if I should take PrEP or not, given the HIV risks in reality (both being the top and bottom)?

Thanks in advance.

 

Posted

If you are a pure Top there is obviously a lot less risk. For you to become positive first of all you have to fuck someone who is HIV postive and have a high viral load before transmission is even possible. It’s very very unlikely according to the partner study that a person is with a undetectable viral load can spread hiv. Most men I know now are hiv undetectable. 

Posted
2 hours ago, BiCurious100 said:

The reason that I'm asking is that I wish to get feed-back from this forum, who 'operate in the real world' (I know that asking a doctor will always get the response of safe sex etc).

When I finally go with guys, I wish to go bareback, since I hate condoms and wish to make an informed choice on if I should take PrEP or not, given the HIV risks in reality (both being the top and bottom)?

Thanks in advance.

You asked about "chances" (meaning odds, I suppose). Broadly speaking, the odds of getting HIV from any one particular encounter with bare sex are fairly low. But it's a risk nonetheless, and the odds are much higher than, say, winning the lottery.

And you're right that this has been covered before (and I suggest you explore some of the topics here), but in a nutshell: if the person you're having sex with is HIV-negative, then your chances are zero. If the person is HIV-positive, it's not zero; if he's on meds and is undetectable, the chances are very close to zero, but not 100.000%.

Conversely: if you're on PrEP and taking it as directed, without fail, your chances of infection are also very, very close to zero.

But here's the thing: you can control taking PrEP. You can't control whether your partner(s) are negative or positive, or undetectable vs detectable, because people can always lie. A poz guy may claim to be negative so as not to miss out; a poz guy who takes his meds but misses doses on a semi-regular basis may not be as undetectable as he thinks, or he may just lie and say he's "on meds" knowing that they're not doing the job 100% due to lack of compliance. All of that is out of your control - but taking PrEP isn't.

The caveat: I understand that in the UK, there can be issues getting started on PrEP (I'm simply reporting what others have posted here). My strong suggestion, however, would be to start that process rolling NOW, so that hopefully your PrEP situation will be sorted out before you "finally go with guys". 

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Posted

Here are some numbers for you (admittedly this is a few years old):
[think before following links] https://www.poz.com/pdfs/P04-14p53.risk_transmission.pdf

All those numbers assume you are negative and not on PrEP and the positive person is unmedicated. There are a lot more variables in real world hookups. You don't know the status of your partners or whether they are on meds. 

People do go for years barebacking even as bottoms without turning poz - I did from roughly 1992 - 2005 and 2011 - 2014 (I was in a monogamous relationship from 2005-2011 and I went on PrEP in 2014). But people have been struck by lightning twice and any number of other low probability events. There are almost 8 billion people on the Earth. With that large a sample size, you are going to see some extreme events. There are also a number of people on this forum who have told stories about getting pozzed the first time they went bare. 

If you bareback long enough (no one can tell you how long), you will eventually poz up. If you want to go bareback and stay neg, get on PrEP. 

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Posted

It’s worth having a look at AIDSMAP ([think before following links] https://www.aidsmap.com) which is a UK based organisation facing HIV/AIDS. There are some pretty up to date statistics that covers both gay and bi/heterosexual encounters. This is a really good resource.  The one thing to remember is that regardless of what the statistics say, low risk is not no risk. If there is a 1 in 1000 likelihood it is just as likely tomorrow as next week, that’s not meant to be alarmist but some guys convert on their first time, others, as @drscorpio says, can go a long time without seroconverting. Look at AIDSMAP is provides a lot of really good info. 

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Posted

When I was on prep, I didn’t get pozzed.  
When I stopped taking prep, I got pozzed.

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Posted

There is no point in trying to work out your risk of becoming infected based on anecdotes from this forum. The statistics like those posted above  will tell you something, but the risk factors involved in something like the spread of HIV are very complex and involve a whole 'sexual ecology' (who is doing what with whom) which affects a given individual's risk level in lots of different ways.

I'm not sure why you seem resistant to going on PreP. It gives you control over your own health, it's increasingly easy and cheap/free to get in many countries, most people don't have significant side effects and, if you are only rarely having sex, you can use the event-based dosing schedule rather than take a pill everyday. PreP changed my life - i would grab it with both hands if I were you.

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Posted

I risked it, bottomed a lot without using prep. I figure my odds of contracting it was 1:50 as a bottom. I also topped a lot, but I’m certain I got knocked up from bottoming. It could have happened at a bathhouse which I frequently went to, but I was also a slut and taking raw cock every chance I got without question.  I also traveled a lot for work and took anon cock at my hotels. Was a lot of cock and cum during that time…though now, it’s even more. I don’t have any worries of contracting it. Got it, take meds, super healthy now and have great sex frequently. 

Posted

If you don't want to get HIV, go on Prep. If you want HIV, don't go on it. I think that's the only advice to give here. If you were already worried about getting it with females, then it sounds like you already know what to do.

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Posted
On 4/2/2022 at 2:01 PM, BiCurious100 said:

Apologies if this has been covered previously or if this comes across as naive.

I'm new on the scene and exploring my bi-sexual feelings and, although I have been barebacking female hookers for several years (sex with the wife has dried up long ago), I have yet to have my first gay sexual experience.

 

My question is what, in your experience, is the HIV transmission risk with bare backing guys?  I'm not on PrEP (although this is someing that I'm considering) and have no ambition to get pozzed. 

When I first started barebacking females, I went through the initial stage (that most of us probably did) of worrying, after the event, if I had caught anything, especially HIV etc...

After a couple of negative test results (I have never had an STI), I got through that initial stage and I'm now happy to fuck any female raw and have no worries afterwards.

I know that raw sex with guys is riskier then with females and that being the bottom also carries a higher risk then being the top, but is it really worth going onto PrEP, in your experience?

- Are there guys, on this forum, who  are not on PrEP and have fucked raw, over a long period and still remained negative?

-   In order for me to guage, how many guys, on this forum, are taking PrEP?

- Finally, if I can ask, are there any guys who 'took the chance' (not on PrEP or before this was available) and ended up getting pozzed?

 

The reason that I'm asking is that I wish to get feed-back from this forum, who 'operate in the real world' (I know that asking a doctor will always get the response of safe sex etc).

When I finally go with guys, I wish to go bareback, since I hate condoms and wish to make an informed choice on if I should take PrEP or not, given the HIV risks in reality (both being the top and bottom)?

Thanks in advance.

 

As it sounds like you're not looking to get pozzed and want to bareback with men, you should get on PrEP prior to fucking men bareback.  Even as a top, if you fuck men bareback and to quote Jurassic Park, "nature finds a way."  Yes, the chance of being pozzed is dramatically diminished when topping, but it does happen.  Get on PrEP prior to starting breeding men. 

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Posted

Thanks for all the feed-back 🖒

 

I called my local sexual health clinic, earlier on today and have made an appointment for a call-back to discuss PrEP.

 

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Posted

There is less risk of HIV infection from fucking as top only and giving oral but people still become poz these ways, it is much more easier and common for guys who are bottom/vers and fucked BB to get pozzed. If you are having sex with men get on prep, take it daily, use condoms, practise safer sex, and get tested as you should be doing.

Posted

Think about this:  A pregnant woman is HIV positive, there is about a 10% chance that, after 9 months in an HIV-positive womb, sharing the same blood-stream, the baby will be born HIV-negative.  That percentage can be increased by taking the right medicine, but even without medicine, there is no guarantee that a baby born to an HIV positive woman will be HIV positive.  I have to assume this is why I am still neg after taking so many loads, many of which would have had to be poz, the virus is contagious, but not super contagious.  It all boils down to dumb luck in the end.

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Posted
15 minutes ago, speedo21 said:

after 9 months in an HIV-positive womb, sharing the same blood-stream, the baby will be born HIV-negative

If they were really sharing the same bloodstream that would be impossible, of course. But they don't.

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Posted

I started having gay sex 10 years ago and only started using prep in the last few years. Never caught anything though I'm off prep now and hoping to become hiv poz

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