feeling bad after sex

[satyricon1]

This is a well known phenomenon, captured in the old Latin saying, "post coitum omne animalium triste est."  The advice given by others above is all worth considering to explain it, but it is nothing new.  Thanks for all the responses to this interesting question. 

[versamarried]

I encountered this when I first started masturbating in my teens due to being raised Catholic. The minute I came I would be overcome with massive guilt I had sinned. Weirdly I was mostly leaning to Atheism by then but it would just come crashing over me. But like all things, the more you do something and get a positive outcome the more emboldened you become and the negative feelings get pushed back.

When I started cheating bareback with guys I would feel terrible immediately after I came. But the more I did it without becoming poz, nor getting caught, the more I just accepted being a bareback cumslut is who I am.

I hunt bare cock regardless of status, always feels great even after I cum now.

[hntnhole]

3 hours ago, MuscledHorse said:

much of the "feeling bad" afterwards can be traced back to the unnatural but religious based sexual programming (ok, let's be honest, religious sexual grooming by Christianity) you've been subjected to since you were a boy

I completely concur.  Having lived through that cultural repression, I know how it feels to be scared into believing that plate of shit in the first place, but then being able to overcome that unnatural, unhealthy belief-system, recognize it for what it is, and push the flush-lever on the toilet.  Organized Religion is the enemy of Freedom.  It is the enemy of our "whole-ness" - meaning all humankind - not just us.  It it the enemy of rational thought, and has crushed the intellectual abilities of untold numbers of human beings through the millennia.  

We humans are perfectly capable of discerning how Spirituality can improve our lives - or not.  We don't need ancient institutions to do it for us.  We don't need re-interpretations of honorable belief-systems of a couple of thousand years ago, but now perverted into vehicles of political repression.  All we need is our intellectual curiosity, and sufficient motivation to delve into the subject with the platitudes of O.R. flushed from our minds.  

I do feel badly about something I did many years ago (not in a sexual context), and it bothers me far more than the fact that I am completely irreligious now.  As far as I'm concerned, the clerics can shake their sticks and rattle their bones till the cows come home, and it affects me not one whit. 

[Guest]

Too be honest, I don't normally feel bad after sex, I had this feeling only few times after having sex with guys I didn't really like. 

[damsonffpig]

18 hours ago, MuscledHorse said:

Part of what you are feeling is the rush of serotonin and oxytocin subsiding but much of the "feeling bad" afterwards can be traced back to the unnatural but religious based sexual programming (ok, let's be honest, religious sexual grooming by Christianity) you've been subjected to since you were a boy. Males are raised to hide their penis in shame and feel guilty about having a libido. If the act of fucking occurs outside of a sexually monogamous marriage it is deemed dirty and sinful, but if the same act of fucking occurs under those specific conditions than the fucking somehow magically transforms into the Ultimate Expression of Pure Love. Western society is raised on this view of sexuality from such a young age it's often hard to see it for the unscientific crap that it is, so you feel subconsciously guilty and ashamed without realizing that's what it is. Let it go and revel in the memory of the Lust you've just enjoyed.

Totally agree, very well expressed and explained

[tallslenderguy]

23 hours ago, MuscledHorse said:

 much of the "feeling bad" afterwards can be traced back to the unnatural but religious based sexual programming (ok, let's be honest, religious sexual grooming by Christianity) you've been subjected to since you were a boy. Males are raised to hide their penis in shame and feel guilty about having a libido. If the act of fucking occurs outside of a sexually monogamous marriage it is deemed dirty and sinful, but if the same act of fucking occurs under those specific conditions than the fucking somehow magically transforms into the Ultimate Expression of Pure Love. Western society is raised on this view of sexuality from such a young age it's often hard to see it for the unscientific crap that it is, so you feel subconsciously guilty and ashamed without realizing that's what it is. Let it go and revel in the memory of the Lust you've just enjoyed.

i think the mind fuck goes beyond the Christian religion and has it's underlying cause in fundamentalism.  i see the same effect in other 'conservative' forms of religions like Islam and Orthodox Judaism, for instance.  As i see it, the "mind fuck" comes from people who are convinced they can read a book and know what "God" thinks/wants. The result is a shift from belief to "knowledge."   Even science, in it's purest form admits that the results of research are what we 'know' so far. Science allows for questioning, fundamentalism does not.   

Fundamentalists are absolutists who assert and equate their rhetoric with "God," and that is what gets conditioned into people. When one violates the rhetoric, the feeling is  (e.g. guilt, shame, fear) they are not going against a belief system, they are going against "God."  One can assess, examine, analyze a belief system, but that gets tricky (read: "impossible") when one has to apply the same approach to an invisible entity.  Humans rely on senses for input, science allows for our humanity, so it's reasonable approach to discovering what is. Fundamentalism uses something similar, but relies on a written document that supposedly records past events where people experienced "God" with their senses. But unlike science, continued fundamentalist religious belief does not require that the stuff in their scriptures be replicated and demonstrated as accurate.

Edited December 15, 2022 by tallslenderguy

[MuscledHorse]

4 hours ago, damsonffpig said:

Totally agree, very well expressed and explained

Thanks! When I did sex related work in school is when I realized how toxically males had been damaged by religion. I've made it my mission as an Apostle of Lust to use my body as a promiscuous male sodomite to show my fellow males you can indulge in carnal sexual Pleasures and live a happy, healthy, fulfilling life free of guilt and shame. I've even created a presentation on the topic which I've gotten to present at both CLAW 22 East and Fist Fest.

[MuscledHorse]

1 minute ago, tallslenderguy said:

i think the mind fuck goes beyond the Christian religion and has it's underlying cause in fundamentalism.  i see the same effect in other 'conservative' forms of religions like Islam and Orthodox Judaism, for instance.  As i see it, the "mind fuck" comes from people who are convince they can read a book and know what "God" thinks/wants. The result is a shift from belief to "knowledge."   Even science, in it's purest form admits that the results of research are what we 'know' so far.  

Fundamentalists are absolutists who assert and equate their rhetoric with "God," and that is what gets conditioned into people. When one violates the rhetoric, the feeling is the are not going against a belief system, they are going against "God."  One can assess, examine, analyze a belief system, but that gets tricky (read: "impossible") when one has to apply the same approach to an invisible entity.  Humans rely on senses for input, science allows for our humanity, so it's reasonable approach to discovering what is. Fundamentalism uses something similar, but relies on a written document that supposedly records past events where people experienced "God" with their senses. But unlike science, continued fundamentalist religious belief does not require that the stuff in their scriptures be replicated and demonstrated as accurate.

Oh I totally agree here. The Muslims are just as nuts as the Southern Baptists and the Mormons. But in the USA, Christianity is the primary historical influencer on this topic. Christianity's sexual dogmas come mainly out of influencers like Augustine and Benedict in reaction to the late Roman Empire. IN their view, this world was not worth bothering about; it's a veil of tears to be survived as we prepare and focus on the next life. Science has allowed humans our humanity again and to behave as our animal brothers do, without shame and guilt. Science has also shown the Christian conflation of sex and Love as synonyms to be false (and damaging) as well. YOU wind up with relationships based on Jealousy of the Other rather than on actual Love.

[tallslenderguy]

11 minutes ago, MuscledHorse said:

Oh I totally agree here. The Muslims are just as nuts as the Southern Baptists and the Mormons. But in the USA, Christianity is the primary historical influencer on this topic. Christianity's sexual dogmas come mainly out of influencers like Augustine and Benedict in reaction to the late Roman Empire. IN their view, this world was not worth bothering about; it's a veil of tears to be survived as we prepare and focus on the next life. Science has allowed humans our humanity again and to behave as our animal brothers do, without shame and guilt. Science has also shown the Christian conflation of sex and Love as synonyms to be false (and damaging) as well. YOU wind up with relationships based on Jealousy of the Other rather than on actual Love.

We are so on the same page with this, i'm just broadening this beyond my own cultural ethnocentricity.  

i was mind blown after reading "Infidel" by Ayaan Hirsi Ali,. where she journals her journey through and out of fundamentalist Islam. While reading her autobiography, i was struck by all the similarities between her religious cultural influences and those in US fundamentalist Christianity.  So much of the same script, just different characters/actors

Speaking of Mormonism, "Educated" by Tara Westover is another expose' of the poison that is fundamentalism. 

Great discussion, thanks for your salient contributions.

Edited December 15, 2022 by tallslenderguy

[hntnhole]

2 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

Great discussion, thanks for your salient contributions.

I couldn't agree more.  Great discussion on this thread by all of you guys.  Thanks !!!

[damsonffpig]

19 hours ago, MuscledHorse said:

Thanks! When I did sex related work in school is when I realized how toxically males had been damaged by religion. I've made it my mission as an Apostle of Lust to use my body as a promiscuous male sodomite to show my fellow males you can indulge in carnal sexual Pleasures and live a happy, healthy, fulfilling life free of guilt and shame. I've even created a presentation on the topic which I've gotten to present at both CLAW 22 East and Fist Fest.

Awesome, keep up the great work

[hungry_hole]

I'm surprised that so many guys here are unaware of this but every guy loses interest in sex right after he cums, it's a well known fact reflected in the French expression "La petite mort"  [think before following links] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_petite_mort#:~:text=La petite mort ( French pronunciation%3A [la,in 1572 with the meaning of "fainting fit."

To be honest, it's the reason I'm a bareback bottom, because every time I experience a guy shooting inside my hole, I feel the same emotional high of an orgasm but without losing interest in sex because I haven't shot my load. The guy pulls out, I feel the cum in my hole, and I'm even hornier and ready for another load. I think many cumdumps are the same, and many fuck and breed a hole once they are ready to leave the sauna or they want to take a break.

I even feel in-love while the guy pumps his load in my hole, and like kissing while he does it.