Whoring while in a relationship

[sindiktas]

Do you have experience of participating in orgies while you are in a relationship at the same time? Have you went to places like Folsom or bathhouses? If you did, did you go alone or together with your partner?

[drscorpio]

My first husband and I eventually opened our relationship. After only a few threesomes, it became clear to us what fantasy had motivated him to open things even though he had been the one to insist on monogamy: he really got off on watching other men fuck and breed me. This was more of a stag fetish than cuck; he wanted to fuck my sloppy hole after they were done. He always insisted that they not have a bigger cock than him, but he was 8" by 6" which meant it usually wasn't an issue. The only time he would ever get jealous was when we played with a guy more hung than him. 

This eventually led to us going to the bathhouse and sex parties together. On a couple of occasions, he put me in the sling at the bathhouse and was actively recruiting guys to breed me. We also played separately in these places. He would check in from time to time to see how many loads I had collected and enjoy a few strokes in my sloppy hole. 

Although I eventually did go on PrEP, a lot of this took place before that. He was really into watching me take loads. 

He passes away suddenly 6 years ago, but I did enjoy our adventurous sex life. 

[ellentonboy]

I met my boyfriend at a group hotel party and we have been together ever since.  It was a random, chance encounter.  After meeting, we spent every weekend together and had sometimes two or three groups come over in a single day.  He had a three bed room home at the time, with a pool, and a computer room where we could do things on web cam.  There was never any jealousy because we were always under the same roof, we knew what the other was doing.  I have no regrets, and I am still with him today.

I am a firm believer that "the couple that plays together, stays together".  We have hooked up with individual guys on a one on one basis as some guys find couples or group a "turn off" and I respect their feelings on that.  But we decided at the beginning that we were not going to miss out on a hot sexual encounter because one of us was not deemed attractive  enough by a potential trick, or he didn't do couples or groups.

It doesn't work for everyone, but in this case we argue more over what to watch on Netflix than who we are going to have over for a three way.

[norefusal]

i know a few couples that one left to be with one of the random "guest stars" from a 3way. all of them describe their previously relationships as flawed or unhappy so my takeaway is you can't break up a happy home. 

i myself had a somewhat similar but different experience and all i can say is this 3rd party saw a crack in our foundation and took the opportunity to drive a wedge in. is he an evil queen? yes. but was our marriage perfect at the time he showed up? no. for all i know he just speed up the inevitable. in my case it was more a riff over drug use than sex. 

today im sober and my ex last i heard was homeless and wanted by the police. so.... 

i guess my advice is be more worried about chem sex than open relationships 

[leatherpunk16]

My late husband allowed me to be a ho almost from the start of our relationship. On our second date, we ended up in the Hole at Jackhammer (Chicago), and I ran into someone I knew. I had previously played with him several weeks earlier, and he asked me to fist him right there. He didn't know I was on a date, and after asking my guy, I went and fisted this dude again right in front of my guy. I thought he'd be upset, but he said "Do that to me when we get closer." 

In the two years we spent together, we'd play with other guys. Sometimes we'd play together, but my man always admitted to feeling inadequate afterwards. If one of us went to a leather/fetish event without the other, we would have a "hall pass" to play with whomever crossed our path. But he had dubious taste in men to say the least. Unfortunately this is what got him killed. He had an infatuation with a former gymnast who got him poppered up AFTER he had taken a little blue pill. I won't get into that depressing mess. 

So there CAN be unseen long-term consequences for couples who play with others and not their partner. I'm not advocating for monogamy here, or against it. But sometimes the partner needs to tell his guy "No, don't play with him. He's bad news" or "I've got a bad feeling about him." 

[hntnhole]

4 hours ago, norefusal said:

so my takeaway is you can't break up a happy home. 

Well said.  When the bedrock is firm, the storms (if there are any) pass and the foundation remains in place.  

Whoring was a part of my other half and my relationship from day one.  Each of us knew the other loved "fresh" action as well as "known" action (i.e. repeats with guys we particularly liked).  We had disagreements over the years, of course, but never about whoring.  Only once did some kid try to "insert" himself into our relationship - and it ended badly for him.  

[ChainedBoy]

Early in our relationship, - 8 years so far - my husbear and I were in a BDSM relationship - so group scenes in play spaces were not uncommon. Pain-play in dungeons where I was on display were a favorite of mine.  We would also go to bathhouses where he stood by the door and sent in dudes of his choosing to fuck and breed me. He loved watching me take loads. Watching my cumtank filled to overflowing. And was always the last to fuck my cum filled pussy, using their spunk as lube. 

[Traviscraymer]

I cheated, I think my last bf knew but didn’t care.  

[bbasslover79]

My first older boyfriend and I did that a lot. It all started with inviting his friends over to have sex with us. Then we started going to sex parties and bathhouses. He was a bottom and loved seeing me get fucked and playing with my loaded hole. 

[MuscledHorse]

When I met my husband I told him up front I was incapable of sexual monogamy. He was happy to hear that and while he plays, he isn't as sexually prolific as I am. He enhanced my sex experiences by turning me from a casual poppers user into a daily huffer and he encourages my constant stretching and use by guys. He has even done camera on some of my porn shoots so he could watch me getting used for hours while he captured it on film. He helps make sure I get at least 4 days of group use a month and encourages me to get use any time I can. I have come home from work before and he's had a guy waiting to fist and breed me. At the last 2 Pig Weeks (10 days of sex parties) I got a new bottle of poppers each morning and he was taking me to private parties for use on top of the daily event party. After I woke up each morning of the event,  I would take the diaper off, examine my gape, open my new bottle of poppers, lube up, huff up and sit down on my stallion dildo. When i wasn't being used by guys I was expected to be resting or popperbating to keep my body at maximum hunger.  I love that I am encouraged and enabled to stay used like I do. He is a such a great guy.

[favorite]

I'd love everything possible: darkrooms, bathhouses, group sex, some fun with other poz guys, and much more. But my partner doesn't want any of that...

And if I take what I need and cheat on him, he always finds out.

[FelchingPisser]

From what I have observed over the years, the best gay relationships, the ones that last, are open.  I was with the same man for 30 years, until his death.  He was an oral only guy.  That limited my sexual expression, but we were 'right' for each other in so many other ways.  When we had an occasional three-way, he saw how much I enjoyed fucking.  He said I should go do it, as it was something he couldn't give me.  We set rules and parameters and off I went two nights a week.  He wasn't jealous--he cared enough to find one more way to make me happy. (And he loved hearing about my adventures--which often led to more sex with the two of us.)

Gay men can write the rules for our relationships--different for every couple.