rawTOP

Admin Note: This is sorta a borderline conversation... As long as it stays focused on the issues surrounding "don't cum in my ass" and you don't get into advocating stealthing particular guys, we should be fine. (So far the discussion is on the right track)... These days I don't hookup with guys who don't want my load in their ass. Back before I started being clear about wanting to dump a load there were a few bottoms who asked me to pullout and cum on their ass or back while I was fucking them. I'd dump half the load in their ass and half on their back or ass. I always thought it was funny when they'd thank me for pulling out when they had half my load in their ass... I mean seriously - did they think they wouldn't get at least some cum or precum in their ass? It's not like pulling out is effective for birth control - and it's not effective at preventing HIV either. I was neg, so didn't really worry that I was harming them - I was more amused at how careless they were being. Honestly, the whole "dumb fuck" thing is sorta hot, but the flip side is that too often the sex with guys like that is just bad...

Hmmm... Yeah, I'm on the other side of that equation... Always wanted a slave/boy I could own. But the logistics and reality of it are complicated. Finding a guy who really is that submissive, and the reality of it is you can't be sexual 24 hours a day (at least not as a top), and then there's stuff like health insurance which the slave would need if he's being a cumdump. But in terms of fantasies - it's a big fantasy...

I like that distinction - the cumhole is the body part, the cumhole is the person... Makes sense...

There's a lot of overlap between the terms cumhole and cumdump, but I think there are still times when one is a more appropriate term than the other... Just wondering if I've got it right... To me a cumdump is more public, "take any load" than a cumhole. You can be your boyfriend's private cumhole, but you're a public cumdump. What do you think? Is there a difference?

I'm going to test a map-based location feature next month.

I think the issue is that there's more to talk about when barebacking is sleazy and edgy. Romantic barebacking is what it is - everyone understands it and it's sorta just taken for granted. But sleazy barebacking is just more titillating and there's more to discuss...

I completely understand the whole fantasy aspect and the fiction section has tons of stories about stealth breeding. To me there's a difference between a movie about robbing a train and actually robbing a train (or advocating or planning an actual robbery)... As adults we should understand the difference.

I'm putting this in the general forum 'cause I want to explain to the people who are turned off by bug chasing why I allow it on the site. Eventually I'll move the thread into the backroom, but I think it's worth a broader discussion initially... A friend of mine in the porn business took offense when I said his traffic wasn't all that raunchy compared to mine. He said he had lots of "rough looking men, fetish including fisting, piss etc." on his sites. But to me things like fisting are pretty mainstream these days. I then related to him some of the challenges of moderating this forum - how some of you cross the line and advocate stealth breeding of unwilling neg bottoms. The idea that I'm promoting bug chasing and gift giving freaked my friend out a bit and so I felt compelled to try to explain it to him in a way he could understand. Here's what I wrote him... ----- I see the whole bug chasing gift giving thing much the same way I see BDSM. Much of "the standard raunchy stuff" you mention works on the basis that sex is about power and control / domination and submission. While romantic sex is put on a pedestal, domination and submission is still quite normal though they're often misunderstood. Still, if you do a BDSM activity to someone who doesn't consent the act becomes rape. The fact that there are scenarios in which the act is rape doesn't mean the other forms of it are evil. Hell, romantic sex can also turn into rape if there isn't consent. Giving and receiving cum is also incredibly natural and normal. I think it's actually quite deep in our psyche. Humans are the dominant species on our planet because we have the drive to procreate. There are bottoms who can't imagine asking a top to use a condom - either because they're submissive or because they crave cum - both impulses are quite normal. Those bottoms have two choices - ignore the fact that they probably will become HIV+ and "just let it happen", or embrace the whole process. I actually respect the people who embrace it more. For them it's a conscious, thoughtful decision. But they're called bug chasers and told to be ashamed of their impulses. To me the problem is the general stigma around bug chasing and gift giving. It's created an environment where all bug chasing and gift giving are seen as wrong (and sometimes illegal). People used to see BDSM in the same light. But there's a difference and consent is the dividing line between the two sides... I don't mind being associated with bug chasing because I see it as something that's normal and natural and done quite thoughtfully. My challenge on the forum are the psychos who think that there's no difference between the criminal form and the normal form. The fact that many gay guys stigmatize all forms of bug chasing and don't draw a distinction between the two types doesn't help... ----- I've had a number of you complain 'cause I temporarily ban you for advocating stealth breeding. In some cases the line is crossed inadvertently - to you they're fantasy scenarios but they seem a bit too real to the rest of us. But I don't apologize for drawing the line and enforcing the distinction. If that bothers you, then you need to go to another site... But for all of you who who've made the decision to be a bug chaser, and all you poz tops who want to help them on their quest - this site is meant to be a safe haven for you... Still, I need the whole bug chasing / gift giving discussion to be off in it's own private area on the site ("the backroom") for a few reasons... One is to keep it away from the eyes of the general public who don't understand it. And two is because it's a turn off for some guys and I want this to be a site they enjoy too... Thoughts?

Any chance you're a PHP/MySQL coder? That's primarily what I need...

I'd be willing to do it, but it would be sometime next year. I've got a lot of other projects on my plate right now...

Yeah, in order to let the bloggers take down the images in one place and have them taken down everywhere, I hotlink images - I don't copy them to my server. Unfortunately it's a global policy - I can't change it on a case by case basis...

You got into the bareback community at 19 (after some experimentation earlier), which is sorta what I'd like to see more of. Thing is, it seems most young guys wait a few more years to really get into the bareback community (if they do at all). How do we make sure that when a guy hits 18 he gets the pro-bareback message loud and clear? Should we alter how we do our marketing to get the message to 18 and 19 year olds more effectively? So far what I'm hearing is 1) mobile and 2) good design. BTW, because of comments on this thread (and my own personal experience not having stuff to jack off to on my iPhone), I've moved forward my plans for a mobile site. At least initially it will be completely focused on mobile users (not just regular site that's mobile friendly). HTML5 + CSS3, plus tricks to detect and adapt to whether the mobile device is in landscape or portrait mode, etc. I also am putting it on a .mobi domain in part because I could get a better domain name than I could with .com...

I know what you mean... I started barebacking when I was in a relationship and it just felt good to be so intimate with my boyfriend...

Going from 0 to 60 isn't always an easy thing to do. You may not have the stamina to be the cumdump you want to be. I'd suggest some practice before the big event...

Hmmm... Or be a bareback gangbang bottom for a night and take loads from anyone and get the iPod - lol

GI Joe in Montréal. Lots of good uninhibited pigs there!

I think it's fine to do it randomly. If you develop fans you probably need to be able to tell them when you'll be on next, but I'd think having a "real guy" with a day job strip for them would be hot to a lot of guys... I never did follow up with them to have them set up a site for me - been busy... But sorta related - in about a month I'll move to a new data center and be on new servers. At that point I'll add chat (including video chat) to this site. But that's different than being a cam model...

Hey... Let's make it happen. I hit you up on A4A... Your BBRT profile name isn't valid...

Can you do all of that in a month? Sounds like a 3 month trip to me... You only have 4 or 5 weekends, so that's 4 or 5 cities... No?

MONTHS AGO??? You gotta fix that problem...

The issue is that some people are into "daddies" from an early age. You're asking some of them to wait a long time to even begin experimentation... It's a tricky thing though...

Different guys are "ready" for sex with adults at different ages. The laws are imperfect because they need to set a single age for everyone. Plus, the common age of 18 was set decades ago before youth became so sexualized and sexually aware. So what age would you set and why would you choose the age of consent? Or would you get rid of the age of consent completely and maybe just stiffen penalties for rape when the victim is young. But isn't there some age that's always too young? Personally I don't know - all I know is the current system doesn't work very well.

Just got done fucking this HOT little muscular Latino. His profile said "neg / safe sex only", but he took my load no questions asked...

Good points, though more advertising than marketing... I was envisioning advertising for the Cumdump Network as I was reading your comments... The cumdump network will be totally about instant gratification for the tops. "Why bother with a fussy safe sex bottom? A cumdump will your load now - no questions asked."