phillygwm

Culturally, we've all read about ancient Rome and Greece where older men with younger boys were just the way things were done. Presumably, those boys weren't horribly scarred from the experience because it was deemed normal back in the day. Fast forward to today: Sex is dirty, gay sex is still largely considered immoral, and large age gaps between partners are seen as inherently exploitative. Whether that's "right" or "wrong", that's what we're taught as a society and there are ramifications for those who deviate from that. Maybe in another 100 or 1000 years it will be normal again but we're living in 2024. If an older person is having sex with a 12 year old, even if it were made legal, it would still be frowned on by our society. Thus, it would still likely need to be done secretively. If you can't tell people, especially your family, what you're doing, a kid will draw the conclusion that there must be something wrong or "dirty" about it. Knowing that if they were discovered, the kid would be "in trouble "with his parents, that's an awful lot to put on a 12 year old. IMHO, THAT'S what messes people up. It's a much heavier burden than experimenting with the neighbor kid in the basement, not that you'd want to be caught in either scenario. Another issue is one of power imbalance: If you're my coach or mentor, I might feel obligated to put out: I'm not with you because I'm attracted to you, I'm there because I'm afraid you'll cut me from the team, or you won't otherwise help me anymore. The issue is picking an age of consent number. It's going to be somewhat arbitrary, not much different than picking a legal driving, drinking or voting age. Maybe there are some 12 year olds that could handle it. There are likely some 18 year olds that can't. A kid doesn't just wake up with emotional maturity one day, nor does it happen to everyone at the same age. Look at the people on here, for example. Many don't have any regrets about what they did as a young kid. But there are a lot of people out there in similar scenarios who were really screwed up by the experience.

Yep, it happened to me, and the email listed a password I once used that was on the Dark Web. It's all BS but the first time I received the email I did panic a bit. This is the world we live in, for better or worse. I'll probably have free credit monitoring for the rest of my life at the rate my data are being compromised. As paranoid as it sounds, we have to assume someone is watching/reading virtually everything we do. Certainly, that's going to be the case here. Even the FBI just warned people to use encrypted apps, since texts can't be considered secure. As for this board, specifically, I'm new. Are there things I'd change if I were in charge? Sure: I'm frustrated that I only get a few posts a day, for instance. But I broadly understand why the rule exists. And ultimately, he who pays the bills makes the rules. We can make recommendations and I'm sure those are at least read and considered, but knowing the rules, our choice is to stay here recognizing potential risks or to not come back. Since I know my stuff is going to be visible here, I try to take a few precautions (I.e. not using my primary email account.) If I ever did something seriously illegal -- and sorry, I'm just not that exciting -- I certainly wouldn't post about it here....or anywhere. Many years ago, I had a friend of a friend was arrested (and did time) for downloading pics he shouldn't have. I'm sure he didn't bother using a VPN, he may have even used his credit card on the site. He was older (this was 20+ years ago, I believe he's dead now) and not a techie, so I'm sure he didn't consider that stuff gets tracked.

Compared to a lot of guys on here, I seem to have a lot: Hate having my nipples touched, just super sensitive. Almost like how a lot of uncut guys can't stand direct stimulation on their cockhead. Not into foot worship. I'm self-conscious about my feet and rarely into someone else's. I need to feel a "connection" before I kiss someone. People especially find this one strange. I can take your cock in my mouth, but not your tongue. Not right away, at least.

I'm neg, certainly not an expert, but have never heard of it. So why am I responding? I also have Low T. In my case, I had an early dx of prostate cancer (I was 45,) was treated with radiation, and it crashed right around that time. I also thought there was a correlation between the two events but docs told me there wasn't. What DID happen was I got depressed. Nothing clinically diagnosed or treated, just an "OMG I'm worried I'm going to die and I'll never get an erection again." Not necessarily in that order. None of that, thankfully, came to pass. However, with that depression came about 40 pounds. Docs told me there was likely a correlation there. Over the last couple years, I'm down 40 lbs. My T is still low -- and I'm still not skinny! -- but it's better than it was 10-12 years ago. There's also a noticeable change to my sex drive. So even if T isn't directly related to HIV, some other conditions which came along concurrently MAY be related.

As a top in my later 50's, the decrease in drive is noticeable. Until I was about 45, I was always horny. Then I got prostate cancer. I went AMA and had radiation rather than removal because at the time, I thought it provided the best chance of retaining function. It did but, coincidence or not, my Testosterone dropped and I was just less horny. In the last couple years, it's rebounded a lot (I've also lost weight, which may have something to do with it.) T is still below normal but it's higher than it was. The major reason why I'm not as sexually active as I used to be largely because of circumstances. I never did the baths, there aren't theaters around, the bookstores aren't close by. The apps are always the same people and either they've rejected me or vice versa. And I especially lack the patience of "the hunt." I'm about 20 miles outside the Gayborhood so when I'm in the mood it's usually just easier to jerk off. Now, if I know I'm going to top, I'll drop a blue pill and I'm OK. I don't need it for receiving oral but -- Newsflash -- when you're in your 50s you generally don't get as hard as an 18 year old.

Same here. I was always concerned that I was a late bloomer. I wasn't, really, just that I was very impatient and knew a couple early bloomers. When I was a pre-teen, looking at a guys pits was how I could tell whether someone was developed which, before I hit puberty, was something I was particularly fixated on. Even to this day, I like seeing young guys' pits and trails (no, not doing anything sexual, but I can look!)

It depends on the guy I'm with but if I'm giving head, I usually prefer to swallow. I want the guy to have to ask me if he shot a lot because he won't see any of it. On the other side, I definitely prefer being swallowed. I'm a top but, given the choice of holes, I'll usually take the mouth because it allows me to sit back, relax, and enjoy.

I'm a top so I don't. But why do I prefer going balls deep when I'm ready? It's something primal, like an animal marking his territory. Aside from that, there's a feeling of dominance; when I fuck a guy it's inherently about my pleasure to some extent. Ironically, I found a quasi-kink when I had a FB years ago. He had a rape fantasy and, while I wasn't super into it, I played along, "breaking in" to his unlocked apartment, pretending to wake him up, etc. Pretty mild stuff. Then he kept asking for it every time and it just got old, so I figured I'd break him of the habit. He was one of those guys who was "game over" once he came, so I usually tried to finish within a minute of him. One time, during a rape scene, I made it a point to get him off before I even removed my clothes, so he was literally finished. Once he shot, I flipped him over, got naked, and basically used him like a Fleshlight for the next half hour. Technically it was consensual; he could have escaped but I reminded him this was what he asked for. He was begging me to hurry up and finish, because he wasn't into it, he was uncomfortable , and I was rubbing him sore because I purposely lubed just enough to penetrate him. Usually, when I came, he felt it and was super aroused, goosebumps etc. This time, when I finally came, I made sure his legs were in the air and I was looking deep into his eyes. Instead of ecstasy, he kind of cringed/had a look of disgust. He later told me when he felt me pulsing he almost got nauseous. Surprisingly, I was totally turned on by that. So the scene served two purposes: 1) He never asked me to "rape" him again (we did continue to play until he moved away); and 2) I found I had a darker side than I realized. The dynamic always varies somewhat when I fuck a guy but I'm usually trying to please him to a greater or lesser extent. This was the only time my partners' pleasure was something I actively avoided and I'm getting hard just reliving it. I need to find a guy with poor self-esteem so I can do it again 🙂

Is it me or does this sound like it should be a question on a math test? Next line: Assuming a volume of one teaspoon per load, how many ounces of semen were expended that evening?

Not trying to cause a debate here. I grew up in Philly and still live in the burbs. Like any city, it's generally safe. There are a number of good parking lots in the area (not necessarily cheap!) The people that get murdered tend to fall into certain categories: drug dealers, domestic issues, drunken arguments, etc. It's pretty rare that a random person winds up dead. I don't hesitate going into the city (was just there on Friday for dinner, the Wanamaker light show, and for a couple drinks at a bar.) A question for those more experienced with the baths. I'm not a bathhouse guy. Not judging; I've been in one, and that was with a guy where we needed a place to go. We didn't really avail ourselves of the social interactions with others 🙂 I've thought about going increasingly but always chickened out, figuring I'd be embarrassed by not knowing the proper etiquette,/ground rules, or I'd be rejected, or I'd be hit on by someone I really wasn't into. All sorts of reasons not to go. Just need to man up sometime!

Right, I know it's an anti-retroviral. The question was merely whether going on and off it can somehow build up a resistance. I didn't think so but figured the guys on here have greater collective knowledge than I do. I don't have issues with side-effects so that isn't a concern. I simply don't want to take anything I don't need. American health authorities don't condone 2-1-1 but it's accepted, IIRC, in Canada and elsewhere so I'd be comfortable going with that if a hookup arose out of the blue (well, a few hours before anyway.) Again, if I thought I'd be having sex fairly regularly, I'd go on the daily regimen. I'm accepting applications if anyone is interested @BootmanLA -- I'd up vote your comment but don't yet have the ability. Consider this your 👍 Thanks to all for the thoughtful replies!

Live in the Western burbs, near KoP. late 50's, 6'0, 235 (on a good day,) TOP, though I do enjoy mutual oral. On PrEP when I'm going to be sexually active so your status isn't a deal breaker by any means. I tend to have a low BS tolerance which can result in dry spells: maybe I'm too picky, I lack the patience for cruising/chasing sex down, and I can be socially anxious/awkward among people I don't know, though I'm extroverted once I'm comfortable with someone (i.e. I generally relax once I've painted your intestines/throat.) I live alone but can easily travel if that's easier for you. Sarcastic (maybe cynical?) sense of humor. Ideally prefer someone with an hour drive, though farther might work for occasional get togethers. Philly and surrounding counties are fine. Love twink types but NOT looking to be a sugar daddy, so for some reason they're not lining up to date me, so open to others 🤣 Decent sex drive is a must. Fairly vanilla but love groups (especially multi-tops on one cumdump.) and turned on by exhibitionists. Open to FB/FWB/LTR if it goes there but not interested in purely platonic. Hope to hear from some of you!

I recently started PrEP but haven't been quite as sexually active as I'd like, so I stopped. If I think I'm going to get lucky, I'll take 2 pills at least 3 hours before. If things work out, I'll stay on it for a while. More often than not, I'm either too picky, not aggressive enough, whatever, so I see no reason to take a daily pill if I'm going to go weeks/months without getting laid. Is there a risk to this? Could I build up an immunity (like antibiotics?) FWIW, I'm a top but I do enjoy swallowing. I have a thing for groups. I've done 3-4 somes but really want to be the last of a bunch of tops with one bottom...someone I wouldn't even need to lube up for. 🙂

I hit puberty in the 70's, so pre-Internet and even VCRs. There were mags and adult theaters which I couldn't access as a pre-teen. But I was a nerd; I learned about sex in the library (reading books, that is!) So I knew what cum was but had never seen it. From what I read, I imagined it had the consistency of toothpaste. When I was 9-10, I had a friend who was the same age but he hit puberty first. One day he told me he had hair but of course I didn't want to ask to see, so I goaded him with "you're full of shit." So he dropped his pants and, sure enough, a bit of hair and he was a LOT bigger/thicker than I was. Mind you, we were 10 so how big could it have been, but it was huge compared to me. Fast forward a few months and I had a few wisps of hair, which I was anxious to show off. Off came the pants and he was even hairier and bigger. He told me he could cum so, again, I goaded him into jerking off for me. I was fixated on his cock as he jerked. Finally, he said he was going to shoot and where did I want him to do it. As a closeted Catholic kid, I wasn't going to answer that question honestly 😇 We were in his basement and we were sitting by a folding table, so I told him to shoot there. At this point, I wasn't aware that one could cum before puberty so I never really tried. Anyway, it wasn't a huge load but it was white and more liquid than I'd envisioned. I touched it with my fingers etc. and was fascinated with the viscosity but the experience was really more "Show and Tell" than anything overtly sexual. I went home that day, locked myself in the bathroom, and figured I was either going to cum or I was going to make it bleed from rubbing it so hard. Sure enough, after a while, I came. I recall it was just a clear drop but it was enjoyable enough that I haven't stopped since. I never had to worry about wet dreams because I proactively emptied myself 🙂 Meanwhile, my friend and I played around a bit. I was way more into it than he was but I'd suck him (I couldn't make him cum but I swallowed when he was ready.) I even "fucked" him, though in retrospect, I was still pretty small so probably was just dry humping the crack of his ass rather than penetrating him.

My ex had the annoying habit of running to the bathroom immediately after I finished in him. This turned into a personal challenge as to how I could make him retain it, usually involving "quickies" when we needed to go somewhere so he didn't have time to release. He always hated the feeling of cum liquefying and leaking out and I suppose it feels like it's a greater volume than it is. He thought it was going to show as a wet spot on his pants, which it never did but WOULD have been hot to see. Hell, I would have called it to people's attention: "Look at how much I came!" 🙂 I wonder why I'm single 😂

I'm in the Philly burbs. Sent you a PM. Brand new to BZ and looking to find local receptacles. Would prefer to go last in a group if possible.

I'm neg and on PrEP. Not trying to make this a Backroom post but I love hearing about my partners' prior experiences. In a different vein, I've asked a "straight" married friend if he remembered the specific session when he impregnated his wife. I frequently ask gay friends about their early experiences, etc. So yes, when I'm with a poz guy I wonder if he knows the guy that pozzed him. To know is just another creepy turn on for me, not judgemental, but I do hesitate to ask because I don't want to offend someone (especially before we've had sex.)