bearbandit
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Everything posted by bearbandit
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Even in the eighties, hospitals in the UK were divided as to weather to list HIV/aids as a cause of death or just the individual diseases involved. Thus my partner died of aspergillosis pneumonia without a mention of HIV, whereas our mutual ex-boyfriend, who died in a different hospital "had to to have AIDS as a cause of death on his death certificate", something which greatly upset his mother. We have our right to medical privacy even after our our deaths! I view coming out as a person with HIV to be much the same as coming out as gay: we should all do it, but only as far as we are able . So if as far as you are able is a twenty-spot in a collection tin - THANK YOU! For me, personally, even moving to a town where I know no-one and looking like shit as I did last year, it's always been a question of "ask me an honest question and you'll get an honest answer..." It took till last week, just before I left for the HIV conference for the shopkeeper of our only shop in the village to ask "are you HIV+ then?" There are plenty of us at grass-roots level who'll stand up and say we're poz (I was on TV last year talking about it) but we live in a celebrity-driven society: once someone does come out as HIV+, just watch their rating fall (worst case) or the respect we're accorded increase (best case). I've never been a royalist but my first thoughts on hearing of Princess Diana's death were "who the fuck's going to look out for us now?"
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I was at the PositivelyUK conference this weekend, and one of "demands/requests" was that someone positive with a high media profile stepped up to the mark. We had in our last government a guy who was not only gay but poz too - we didn't hear about that last bit till he was out of office! It would be nice if they came out before their careers nosedived... The one everybody in the UK looks to is Freddy Mercury: he didn't come out till the day before he died - and we did a massive job in collaborating with his "little secret": I was a regular at many of his favourite (well, the cheaper!) bars. Two of my boyfriends shared the same doctor... It was his responsibility to come out and the sod didn't till nearly the last moment. Sorry, I could rant about HIV visibility for Wales! (That's if it were an Olympic sport and if we were allowed our own team instead of being subsumed into the UK team...)
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undetectable top and negative bottom
bearbandit replied to madltnlvr's topic in HIV Risk & Risk Reduction
I'm bloody paranoid about anybody getting HIV from me: if you're with a neg bottom - go for it! Undetectable serostatus is at least as effective as as condoms as far as HIV transmission is concerned. The worst that can happen is one of you pick up one of the "lesser" STI's all of which, even, Hep C are curable (though to be fair, Hep C does take a long time to medicate and get over). I praise you for your caution, but even by my standards, you're taking it a bit far... Do me a favour: fuck his brains out tonight! And tell us all about it tomorrow! -
Damn! You saw thru my gameplan! There's something about getting verbal that turns me on like crazy (just before re-visiting this message I'd been trying to get hold of an old friend to try and set up something for his other half which would have involved lots of filth... and to follow being "discovered" with my hand up his arse, so the other half could take it out on my arse - shit but that man can fuck!)
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Bottoms: What do you do when you're not enjoying the fuck?
bearbandit replied to rawTOP's topic in General Discussion
I go along with it for as long as I can (I'm working on being a control freak!)... But I get fuckin' mad at my boys if they don't tell me what was going wrong for them! The problem is that we've lost an entire generation almost who would have taught today's 20/30 year olds how to fuck/get fucked (or whatever other nasty little kink they have in their heads - please consider this a personal ad!). -
Not in the least: I might use HIV in the verbals, just like I might threaten all sorts of other things that I wouldn't do. I regard my undetectable status as access to more men I'm not a gifter (with my viral load it would take forever - I could wear off my foreskin, FFS), I have little patience with chasers, because I've got a pretty clear knowledge of the things that can go wrong, whether from an illness point of view or a medication side effect point of view. I just want raw sex to be seen as a viable alternative to the condom nazis. Regular testing + treatment if indicated = lots of horny fun, and that's what we're for , isn't it?
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Back from the PositivelyUK conference in London where those who got to see it were amazed at the quality of the work (Nu Tatu in Neath) and at the fact that it's remaining perfectly smooth days later. I spoke to my mate from Gay Switchboard and he seems happy to use a photo of it as the poster for the training event I'm doing in November about the whys and wherefores of raw sex. I just think it's funny that they have to go 200 miles to find someone prepared to be open (as it were) about barebacking when we know that half of London's gay men are up the other half's asses without a rubber in sight!
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The thing men are most likely to lie about is sex. Well, maybe money and sex. I don't want to fuck with guys who are nervous about fucking with a poz guy: I respect your decision. That's one of the reasons behind getting the biohazard tattoo - it gives you warning that I'm poz. On the other hand, since my viral load is zero, it also means you're missing out on what could be some great sex ;-)
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The same drug is used for PEP (post exposure prophylaxis) and has to be started within 72 hours of exposure. But that's an emergency measure. Bearing in mind I'm not a doctor, just a prescription drug whore (as a friend once described me on a PwHIV-only board), I'd go with the caution of making it a month, or at least a couple of weeks minimum. After a month any immediate side effects are going to have shown up, so if you get through the first month, I'd say you're good to go. But please keep up with the bloodwork, especially the kidney function tests. Damaged kidneys are no fun at all. Good luck, and any potential side effects, get thee to thy doctor!
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address saved - complaint to sent to Facebook for what good that will do. And thanks again for all your hard work - my tongue wherever you want it
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It's horny as all fuck pretty much any way you do it: from a distance there's the chance of overspill and the sight/feeling of piss trickling down the body - all the better if he's furry! Same goes for only and inch away: you can't keep up with the flow... Lips wrapped around the dick means no option but to swallow. And of course there's the extra liquid to deal with: nothing like seeing the piss spread along denim. That said, my favourite remains recycling: a few bottles of beer last a lot longer this way! At SM Pride in the nineties I did it with a buddy and we only drank half the beer (Newcastle Brown makes for wonderful beer piss) we'd normally have drunk. Each time one of us needed to piss, the other drank the lot. We were discreet about it: always in the toilets, where some of the straight SM guys raised an eyebrow or two. After three bottles each we got to the point of needing to piss every ten minutes, which is when we called it a day. My other favourite memory is the Italian piss-slut I met in a London club (pre public sex). I'd take him to the toilet, make him squat along side the urinals, and gods help him if he spilt any... Cautionary note: this boy was also into shit, which I'm not, but hadn't had a hep B vaccination. I've had hep B and it's no fun - get vaccinated!
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I can promise you a wider range of abuse than that: there's something about getting sucked off that opens the cesspit of my mind and makes me very vocal... All the better if you can take being slapped around a little without hurting my dick.
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In Firefox 24.0, right click the pic and look for "save image as" in the context menu... Hope that's worked...
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We must have been writing at the same time - I'm just slower at typing, Jizz. Complete agreement.
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I'm afraid as optimistic as PrEP makes me feel as a stage one prophylaxis (and yes, I'm aware that this is a change of heart), I'm afraid you're probably right. I've heard of a guy in London who's breeding bottoms and giving them a single truvada capsule in case they change their minds. It might be urban legend, but PEP needs a full month's worth of truvada to approach being effective. Some guys just don't get that it's not their own lives their playing with, it's other people's
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The UK euphemism is "safer sex: needs discussion". Though I do know of guys, even from here, who are "safer sex: always" elsewhere...
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Where did you get (or give) your last load?
bearbandit replied to rawTOP's topic in General Discussion
After the weekend it looks like: no post from the tattooist's (they lose out because I was going to use the image they took for the poster for the in-service training I'm doing in November in London and would have credited them), but I'm sure I'll be able to get someone at the PositivelyUK conference this weekend to take pics... -
Prevention is better than cure. Once HIV has had a go at your internals truvada is less effective and you're more likely to have the sort of drug reaction I had last year. PrEP is by no means perfect; it needs a lot more work, and in my opinion, different drugs, but if you want ti raw and don't want to chase the bug, it's the only option available as yet. I have two pleas to people using PrEP: (1) take it properly as prescribed to protect yourselves and the rest of us should you be unlucky, and (2) keep up with the blood work: the side effects of tenofovir can get extremely nasty in less than three months. Read my posts from July 2012 to find out how.
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Where did you get (or give) your last load?
bearbandit replied to rawTOP's topic in General Discussion
Is it worth even talking about? A guy from Growlr talked a good fuck. Total top etc (been needing to relax back into bottom mode recently). Went to his place in full bike leathers, even though I can't ride any more and need a stick after breaking my ankle when I trashed my last bike. He was too big and heavy for me to turn things round (<push down> "this is how it's done") so I got my ass tickled a bit and that was it. Still, got my biohazard tattoo the next day... -
Think I might have syphilis
bearbandit replied to 19HairyBoy's topic in HIV/AIDS & Sexual Health Issues
Thank YOU for checking it out: had it been syph and your luck was in, a number of others (I don't know how your luck goes!) might have an unwelcome visitor. Too many guys hope that something wrong will just go away, making themselves (and others) ill in the process. As a general rule STI clinics are happier saying "thanks for checking but nothing wrong" than "we need to talk". -
How can I delete my profile/account?
bearbandit replied to rawTOP's topic in Tips, Tricks, Rules & Help
Nice one drscorpio... I fully agree with RawTop's refusal to remove posts: there's a British board I'm on where I posted a lot while I was delusional from Fanconi's syndrome and, in an act of throwing my toys from the pram, I demanded the removal of posts I'd written while I was dementing. I was the second highest volume poster, and well over a thousand posts went down the pan. Looking back at those threads now, they don't make sense and I deeply regret my demand to have those posts removed. -
How can I delete my profile/account?
bearbandit replied to rawTOP's topic in Tips, Tricks, Rules & Help
Further to JizzDumpWI's sensible suggestion, change your avatar to a blank square, or remove it altogether. -
Just had mine done a couple of hours ago - perfectly plain, all black, at the base of my neck (might as well use the fat of the buffalo hump for something!). My bloody camera wouldn't work, so the receptionist took a photo with her phone which they promised to send to me tomorrow. First tattoo I've had in twenty years - I still get off on the colour gun!
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I've heard of the idea that ancestors surviving plague gives a greater resistance to HIV, but I hadn't heard of the Spanish flu connection. Nowhere in the UK seems to do this sort of work: I'd be fascinated (not just from an HIV point of view) to find out more about my genetic heritage as I see myself as a typical Celt. I like to to tick the "white - other" boxes on equal opportunities questionnaires and write in the word "Celtic"... But that's just me bucking against authority as usual!
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Have been a fucken whore?
