After reading the thread on the double secret life, and posting on it. I thought about the price that bi married men have to risk for engaging in risky sexual behavior. Also,I was just thinking that any of us, me included, could have a daughter who is either married to a man or has a boyfriend who engages in this type of risky behavior. It also made me think about my sister, my mom, or any woman I deeply care about who could be in a relationship with a man who is basically a serial cheater or whore.
Even though I am sounding preachy by now, I do think that anyone who's in a relationship, and basically wants his cake and eat it too, should either wear a condom when he's out there playing. It's just the moral and common sense thing to do so that your partner is protected from getting an STD.
Before I read the thread on double secret life, I really didn't care if the bottom I bred was married or not. Now I do because I am thinking what if I had a STD or worse had HIV, and didn't know it yet. I could be potentially responsible for infecting an innocent person's wife or partner.
I said all of this because I know someone who has been married for almost 20 years. He's smart, educated, has the big house with the white picket fence, and two kids. He's very active at his local church, even teaches Sunday School. But he told me how he couldn't any longer suppress his sexual urges to be with a man. Even though the sex with his wife was regular, he told me that he wasn't being fully sexually satisfied. So, after 8 years into his marriage, he began to act on those urges that got uncontrollably hard for him to suppress.
He told me that he has slept with over 1000 men during the last 10 years, gotten chlamydia, gonnarehea, and exposure to syphilis after a guy he barebacked with told him that he was tested positive for Syphilis. He gave his wife chlamydia once, and she forgave him for it. But that didn't stop him from messing around.
He just found out that he's been having sex regularly with a circle of about 7 poz men in his community who happen to sleep with each other and do drugs together too. Also, he says that he no longer has sex with his wife strictly because he's afraid of giving her another STD---and not sure about his HIV status until he tested again.
The sad part about his situation is that his wife doesn't even suspect or thinks that he's still messing around because he told me that she still seeks sex from him, and that he has gotten really good at not getting caught. But because he is basically out of control with his multiple sex partners, that he averages about 14 different guys a month, some he has been regularly seeing for about 8 years. He has no energy or libido left for sex with wife anymore.
Talking about a bad situation for this poor guy. I typed all of this for married guys or guys who have a partner. Really think about the risk you are not only putting yourself in, but the risk you are putting an innocent person in, when all you could have said to the person is I need to break up, and do my thing. Also, no court is going to rule on your side when the evidence proves the you selfishly and deliberately engaged in risky behavior that destroyed your family, your life, and caused shame for you and your family once you are outed.
The price to pay is great for a bi married man who is living a double secret life for a quickie hook up to get his jollies off. Is it worth it? Only you can answer that question. I just did for you, and the answer is unequivocally HELL NO!