Depression & Barebacking/bug Chasing

[RawNerdUK]

On 10/22/2016 at 10:56 AM, cheatingjock said:

Wondering how many people who bareback or bug chase suffer from depression?

Quite likely for me too.

[ffWhole]

On 10/22/2016 at 1:13 PM, Guest ff-whole said:

I have been suffering from heavy depressions all my life...

I think that the destructive behavior could be very well part in it. It probably does with me.

I am not really a bug chaser, but I am still having extreme risky sex.

Like jumping out of a building and being asked half way down how am I doing...

"So far - so good..."

 

I take Cannabis Oil with THC and for the last couple of months I finally found some rest in my head. FINALLY....

However now that I am hooked on barebacking and taking anonymous loads, so I doubt if I'll stop this way of having sex.

This was me years ago...
I can say now that with taking high THC cannabis oil - all my depressions are completely gone.
However, I still take bareback cock and loads without asking ...
After a year or so taking Prep, I lost fear completely, but getting Prep is hard so now I basically are completely taking bare loads - period.
The fear is turned into adrenalin and I love the sexual high. Mind you - I like the THC high as well.

[Pampix]

Barebacking has the opposite effect for me. It makes me happy. Feeling being desired and receiving the present of semen in my body from a guy and make him happy that he cums. Receiving his most intimate and private message in my inner-me. What I noticed after 2 weeks of vacation in Greece with two other guys that fucked me at least 2 times a day is that I became depressed the following days after the vacation when I was not receiving my daily dose of semen in my ass...

[FallenLad]

I know a lot of my anxiety stems from the need for approval and to please others (likely due to my childhood).

Being a cumdump slut let's me entirely focus on pleasuring someone else, I'm there purely for them to use and enjoy. Getting fucked and bred is a way for me to get that in a simple way.

[norefusal]

well... 

we live in a post-prep world so surely i'm not the only one getting annoyed by all the bareback=high risk talk like it's forever 1995. 

as for bug chasing: one thing i've learned about the community is that we all have different reasons for the attraction. not all of it is coming from a place of self- harm. sure, those guys online begging to be made an "aids whore" perhaps fit the depression led me to self- harm mold, but i don't think that's all chasers. 

 

[22cumdump]

I also observe this connection in my life. Depression and anxiety leading to self-destruction impulses, as a means of validation. This includes not only BB, but also online exposing. I adore BBing, but I recognize it is quite a sad situation. In terms of validation, I believe it's linked to the perception of feeling useful (as a cumdump to people), and desired. It is also a bit contradictory, since validation is searched through submission.

Interesting topic.

[FatPig96]

I'm probably quite high in depression state RN. I hate my body because I just can't find a partner because of it. Even thru I'm working out and loosing weight it goes so slow that it probably just helps feeding it. And now that I'm in talk with some gift givers and how they want me, it makes me feel welcomed, even more that they want to make my fantasies into a reality and it's just keeps me going in. 

 

[SugarCaneDaddy]

I do. Lets not pretend we don't fill the void with reckless sex sometimes.

[pozbtm1983]

30 minutes ago, Different8 said:

Need that alpha cock balls deep in my jockpussy

Me2

[YourNoLimitsBottom]

On 10/22/2016 at 5:56 AM, cheatingjock said:

As in risk taking behavior/self destructive.

Same. Work stress is high and hasn't changed in decades. Knowing that nothing changes ever. Risky sex acts are a release from the real world for me. Definitely not healthy, but once I'm naked in a room with cock the inhibitions are out the door and I can forget about life for a while. Fucking is definitely my drug.

[BadBob214]

I have suffered from depression and anxiety for a very long time but, medication has helped. At the same time I suffered, and still do to a certain extent, self loathing, lack of personal confidence and self destructive behaviour. When I have bareback sex I feel I'm completely surrendering my body to someone else in that, I have no control over what he does to me or whether he's infected with anything. Not only does BB satisfy my self loathing and self destructive desires I also lose myself completely for a short time when I have a bare cock in me and  dosed up on poppers.

Edited June 28, 2024 by BadBob214

[ffWhole]

On 1/16/2019 at 2:46 AM, wonderfulfuture said:

Communities around [banned word] fetishes like bug chasing are usually tight-knit, and often there's some degree of trust between gifter/chaser even if it's just temporary. I think some guys crave that more than the virus.

Exactly this... the thrill is the high that I needed at that time...

Another way to get my depression under control was to have a high stress level in my job during an important project. After the project would finish I would fall so deep, you have no idea.

After I lost yet another job, and finaly after my divorce, I would go back to my old life; travelling as a nomad with my back-pack. At that period it was South America... and I would be so anxious in big cities, sometimes, not so safe cities and the anxiety would keep the depression away.

Of course I would also visit gay bath houses and other venues to get my high from unprotected sex.
That would definitely get me in a very high state of anxiousness and keep my depressions at bay.

With the Cannabis Oil I conquered my depressions once and for all.

I still crave the freedom of travelling and I definitely crave the unprotected sex. Not really bug chasing. But the high is still there. Earlier, the high from unprotected sex would be a great amount of fear and anxiety... the fear went away as I moved older and now without the depressions I just get the high but no more fear.

I just feel extremely kinky and love to be used as a cum slut or dump.

I haven't been depressed for over 8 years and this after over 50 years of living hell, I can tell you: it feels damn good.

[Latin1990]

Maybe, I Am no a mental health professional and can only speak for myself I have only been diagnosed and treated for anxiety but we are exploring the intermittent depression so in my case is the mechanism I used to cope with the idea that  I may be single for the rest of my life, there are many great guys out there to spend the life together but the right mutual match feels like luck like winning the lottery, bareback on the other end give you a glimpse of that with multiple great guys so when depression and hopelessness arrive I just take several loads that help me get out of the hole 

[SugarCaneDaddy]

On 6/26/2024 at 1:29 PM, FatPig96 said:

I'm probably quite high in depression state RN. I hate my body because I just can't find a partner because of it. Even thru I'm working out and loosing weight it goes so slow that it probably just helps feeding it. And now that I'm in talk with some gift givers and how they want me, it makes me feel welcomed, even more that they want to make my fantasies into a reality and it's just keeps me going in. 

 

Or find someone whos into your type of body. Trust me we are a ton 

[Tintinak]

My anxiety makes me really scared of meeting with guys at all. The 'apps' don't work for me and I am awful at flirting in real life. My low self esteem means I assume they will find me disgusting/a turn off. My depression reduces my libido. My meds give me weaker erections and anorgasmia, so 'topping' is a struggle and I rarely enjoy it and there has been a massive imbalance of bottoms to tops wherever I have lived. I just don't understand how other people have sex lives at all.