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Can we retire “BBC”?


DrrAld

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10 hours ago, DrrAld said:

I’ll preface by saying that “attractive” is subjective and the face one finds beautiful, another might not. nelly26, you used that linked list to make this point when I actually find Cutler to be cute and cuddly.

 

Also, I’m not one to dismiss interracial sex in life or porn (two very different things) and don’t think it would be beneficial to segregate performers. I’d venture to say doing that would actually do the opposite; further isolating and othering.

 

To the point: Wanting to not simply be viewed and used as a vessel for fetishisation, fantasy fulfilment or gratification and having a preference or attraction to races other than your own aren’t mutually exclusive. Interracial relationships/sex and muted racial bias can actually co-exist.

 

In porn, a scene isn’t problematic because it has a Black top or tops and a White bottom; male or female. It’s problematic when the title is “BBC fucks (insert name)” (as barecub85 mentioned) and the Black men are simply relegated to being tools of taboo fulfilment and or aggressive/deep pleasure for the White receiver who’s often depicted as “good” or “innocent” and the norm. You simply don’t see well-endowed White performers being labelled as such.

 

Furthermore, there is a vast difference between racial and role play and generalised fantasy. If it’s explicitly known that someone enjoys referencing race during play, have at it. I find myself occasionally saying, “Fuck my Black ass” to even my Black top sex partners. Some take it further and indulge in full-on racial identity and epithetical engagement. That’s beyond my limits, but again, it’s what they’re into and I’m not judging.

 

Where it becomes hurtful is when you have forums such as this where you continually see the preference for Black men (or “BBC”) conflated with a desire for deep impaling or fullness and references to sexual fantasies and fetish as though this is the only purview by which you would even entertain sleeping with or engaging with a Black person. When his “big black dick” is the main (and often only) trait causing attraction.

 

I’ve actually had men say to me, “I’m not into Black guys but would love to see your dick”. I can’t count the number of times it’s assumed that I’m a top or that I’m lying about my desire to simply bottom. At bathhouses and sex parties, I’ve been in assless neoprene briefs (deliberately made to completely cover your groin) and had men try and reposition the front to see what’s underneath. This sort of “I haven’t but ...” or excited desire to engage with my crotch doesn’t usually happen with top men which further legitimises the problematic nature of the desire for “BBC” vs a general preference for Black men.

 

Additionally, some Black men who would otherwise be great sexual partners are made to feel inadequate because they don’t have a “BBC” while others, like myself (even as a bottom), are made to feel as though our big penis is the only attribute of value. We’re turned into a monolith or a category of sex instead of treated as a full human capable of having their own desires and it feels like shit all around.

 

And for those who feel attacked or are “sick of being told what’s offensive”, check your privilege. I will say again that preference is not the issue and most (keyword: most) people aren’t against interracial play or relationships. If you’re a White bottom who enjoys being with Black men, have at it. I enjoy us too. But please be cognisant of and understand that the Black guy you’re into (even for five minutes) has probably experienced stereotyping and treatment based simply on the colour of his skin and just as you’re escaping into the pleasure of sex and his “BBC”, he is more than his penis and entitled to reciprocal pleasure beyond the remnants of your desire fulfilment. We’re not here to simply service you and your fantasies and, unless stated otherwise, may not even be into you or what you’re offering.

 

In the world at large, we’re already considered a minority, but when you narrow it down to the LGBTQ+ stratosphere and within that, the sex positive subculture at large, we’re a small bunch. Because of that, a lot of guys don’t say anything about this topic so I decided to do it for us.

 

I don’t claim to speak for all Black men, but feel pretty confident saying that most feel the way that I do. Ask one of them and see what they say. And if you don’t have anyone to ask, perhaps that’s part of the reason why this continues.

 

Thanks for reading.

Cutler is not cute and cuddly under any circumstances, but the rest I agree with you. 

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13 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

 

i think you make some good points. i think it would be naive to think there is no bias in porn media.  i know my perceptions of black men have changed dramatically over my life time, a lot of those changes resulted from relationships with black guys that exposed my false, and often deeply hidden, cultural notions.  Someone in this thread or another mentioned that they find the descriptor/s"good looking, etc., " off putting. me too. i'm honestly intimidated by guys who i perceive as gorgeous, makes me feel inadequate. These days i am much more inclined to judge attractiveness from attitude than i am physical looks.  

i can't prove why, but i am initially attracted to black men because of my experiences with them, so it's totally subjective. Out of all the black guys i've been with (a lot, i lived half my life in areas where blacks were the majority population), i can remember only one who didn't make me feel wonderful to be with because of a deeper than physical connection.  i have fallen in love with soooo many black hook ups, lol. fuck. The one black guy that just made me feel used was probably the hottest one of all, by normal social standards of beauty?  It never stopped me from hookng with Him, but i never had to bite my tongue from declaring my adoration for Him like others.  i have wondered if it's not so much what they have as what they don't have? I.e., the white privilege attitude? idk

i think it would be interesting to take a pole and see the similarities and differences of how guys perceive beauty, attractiveness.  Of the two black guys on that list, i'd put Mario Costa in the Top three. But honestly, i had to google to confirm that He is black. i'd put the other black guy, "Cutler" about the middle of the list, i liked His eyes and smile. i think it's telling that they put a rebel hat on Him?!?  

Someone i've long had the hots for is Barak Obama lol. i think He is totally hot, but for me so much hinges on personality. Looks just isn't my primary factor when it comes to attractive. 

Like I mentioned with my porn example, I honestly think that gay white men (especially gay white tops) are so far gone on the “picky scale” that they constantly reject average to ugly white bottoms and white versatiles on a daily basis.  These rejected white bottoms and versatiles then come to black men who are obsessed with them because they are white, and in gay world anyone white is viewed as #1 priority no matter how average-looking or ugly they may be.  These white bottoms and versatiles then go on to talk about “how black men are better lovers”, “how black men are better at sex”, “how they’ve always liked black men”, all the while ignoring the fact that they were always ignored and never even stood a literal chance in dating a good looking white top because they were constantly rejected. They come to black as a 2nd option, especially since they know they’ll be placed on a pedestal. 

It’s 2019 and the jig is up. 

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5 hours ago, Roro123 said:

As I mentioned, I’m talking about studio gay porn meaning mainstream gay porn produced mostly by funky, older, fat white men. If you still don’t follow, I’m looking for black gay porn actors that look like Brian Pumper and Mr. Marcus, they don’t exist. 

In the mainstream studios yeah, but personally I find XL , Chino black, Gio and even Trap are very good looking and most are vers which is nice to see. A lot of the more black productions are a bit too heavy on the Thug theme which needs to change.

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The gay community will always have a real issue with labelling which just results in us objectifying guys (it’s something I know I’m guilty of, which is probably an issue for another thread) but terms like daddy, bear, muscle jock, twink, whatever, can be applied to any race. Is it really necessary to have such terms like “bbc” as well which only serve to objectify a particular race? I personally don’t think so.

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1 hour ago, find91 said:

In the mainstream studios yeah, but personally I find XL , Chino black, Gio and even Trap are very good looking and most are vers which is nice to see. A lot of the more black productions are a bit too heavy on the Thug theme which needs to change.

Yes I agree. The black productions are low-budget and perpetuate the “thug” stereotype which in my opinion suggests that a lot of gay black men don’t have any self-esteem or self-reflection. They see white mainstream gay porn portraying black actors as hung thugs for years, to the point where a lot of black men just think that this is the image they need to portray themselves as because they think this image is desirable. 

This is why the term BBC will never end because like people have mentioned here, you have black men constantly using this term as well. The embarrassing thing is that over half of these black men calling themselves, “BBC” don’t even have a big dick. Their dick is maybe 7 inches on a good day and their egos are way overflated by some white bottom who can’t get dick from white tops.  Anything 8 and over is big in my opinion. 

Now I realize that everyone is different and unique, but this is how I see things play out from a birds eye view both in porn and in real life. 

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23 hours ago, nelly26 said:

I found this link called, "The 14 Biggest Dicks in Gay Porn Right Now".  It has pictures and I wonder who out of the 14 is the least facially attractive, hmmm....

https://www.thesword.com/the-13-biggest-dicks-in-gay-porn-right-now.html

I am a bottom who loves taking a big cock. I would be face down - ass up for any of them in a second. That said let me run through this list (which is from 4 years ago - some of these guys don't seem to have lasted) 
Sean - handsome white guy
Luke Milan - nice body but kind of funny looking in the face white guy
Jack Harrier - handsome white guy (as near as I can tell from this photo)
Andrew Stark - average looking white guy with an okay body
Sam Truitt - average looking white guy
Mario Costa - handsome hispanic guy with a nice body
Joel Birken - white guy with a funny looking face
Tim Kruger - average looking white guy
Rafael Alencar - nice body hispanic guy with a plain face
Leo Alexander - really handsome white guy
Rocco Steele - built white guy with kind of a rough face
Boomer Banks - built white (maybe hispanic not sure) with a really rough face. He is my choice for least attractive on this list. 
Culter X - nicely built black guy with an average face
Antonio Biaggi - handsome hispanic guy with a nice body

I realize my taste is subjective, but MOST of those guys are only porn stars because they have a huge piece of meat. 

There are plenty of plain to ugly guys who have been big in porn. Rick Donovan is the best example of this I can think of; he was really a big deal when I first came out in the early 80s. 

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17 minutes ago, drscorpio said:

I am a bottom who loves taking a big cock. I would be face down - ass up for any of them in a second. That said let me run through this list (which is from 4 years ago - some of these guys don't seem to have lasted) 
Sean - handsome white guy
Luke Milan - nice body but kind of funny looking in the face white guy
Jack Harrier - handsome white guy (as near as I can tell from this photo)
Andrew Stark - average looking white guy with an okay body
Sam Truitt - average looking white guy
Mario Costa - handsome hispanic guy with a nice body
Joel Birken - white guy with a funny looking face
Tim Kruger - average looking white guy
Rafael Alencar - nice body hispanic guy with a plain face
Leo Alexander - really handsome white guy
Rocco Steele - built white guy with kind of a rough face
Boomer Banks - built white (maybe hispanic not sure) with a really rough face. He is my choice for least attractive on this list. 
Culter X - nicely built black guy with an average face
Antonio Biaggi - handsome hispanic guy with a nice body

I realize my taste is subjective, but MOST of those guys are only porn stars because they have a huge piece of meat. 

There are plenty of plain to ugly guys who have been big in porn. Rick Donovan is the best example of this I can think of; he was really a big deal when I first came out in the early 80s. 

Totally agree about the faces being subjective. What attracts one might not attract another. However, the issue isn’t about aesthetic beauty and doesn’t change the fact that you don’t see White guys, “attractive” or not, being courted, marketed, or labelled as having “Big White Cocks”. If anything, it’s simply normalised to “Big Dick” or “Monster Cock” and race isn’t involved.

Edited by DrrAld
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4 hours ago, drscorpio said:

I am a bottom who loves taking a big cock. I would be face down - ass up for any of them in a second. That said let me run through this list (which is from 4 years ago - some of these guys don't seem to have lasted) 
Sean - handsome white guy
Luke Milan - nice body but kind of funny looking in the face white guy
Jack Harrier - handsome white guy (as near as I can tell from this photo)
Andrew Stark - average looking white guy with an okay body
Sam Truitt - average looking white guy
Mario Costa - handsome hispanic guy with a nice body
Joel Birken - white guy with a funny looking face
Tim Kruger - average looking white guy
Rafael Alencar - nice body hispanic guy with a plain face
Leo Alexander - really handsome white guy
Rocco Steele - built white guy with kind of a rough face
Boomer Banks - built white (maybe hispanic not sure) with a really rough face. He is my choice for least attractive on this list. 
Culter X - nicely built black guy with an average face
Antonio Biaggi - handsome hispanic guy with a nice body

I realize my taste is subjective, but MOST of those guys are only porn stars because they have a huge piece of meat. 

There are plenty of plain to ugly guys who have been big in porn. Rick Donovan is the best example of this I can think of; he was really a big deal when I first came out in the early 80s. 

Just for the record Boomer is latin and a fashion designer ( the fashion designer part isn't really relevant but..)

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4 hours ago, DrrAld said:

Totally agree about the faces being subjective. What attracts one might not attract another. However, the issue isn’t about aesthetic beauty and doesn’t change the fact that you don’t see White guys, “attractive” or not, being courted, marketed, or labelled as having “Big White Cocks”. If anything, it’s simply normalised to “Big Dick” or “Monster Cock” and race isn’t involved.

I totally get that point, and I think you are right about that.

I was responding to @nelly26 implying in porn it is only black tops who weren't handsome. 

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Whenever I come across “BBC” the first thing that pops into my head is “British Broadcasting Corporation”. I am a huge fan of the BBC.

I am also, as it happens, quite partial both to black Tops, and to hung Tops. If a given Top turns out to be both, so much the better.

But I have never once used any language in a profile or an ad that might suggest that I would favor any man over any other man on the basis of the color of his skin or the size of his cock, and certainly not over anything as arbitrary as whether or not he is “attractive”.

From time to time, black Tops will message me asking, “You like bbc?” I actually don’t assume the message conveys anything about cock size - I interpret it as shorthand for “Are you willing to have interracial sex with a black man?”

I always answer yes, because I do/am/will, completely regardless of the size of the cock that arrives attached to the man. One of the most liberating decisions I have made in my sexual life was to give my ass to any man who asked for it - applying zero discrimination at all has provided me freedom and opportunity, variety and delight.

I have never been and would never be comfortable using the term “BBC” in the present context, because so much unnecessary value judgment is carried in three letters. I agree with the OP that it’s best to discourage its use.

Unless referring to Her Royal Majesty’s broadcasting service.  Quite.

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16 hours ago, ErosWired said:

Whenever I come across “BBC” the first thing that pops into my head is “British Broadcasting Corporation”. I am a huge fan of the BBC.

I am also, as it happens, quite partial both to black Tops, and to hung Tops. If a given Top turns out to be both, so much the better.

But I have never once used any language in a profile or an ad that might suggest that I would favor any man over any other man on the basis of the color of his skin or the size of his cock, and certainly not over anything as arbitrary as whether or not he is “attractive”.

From time to time, black Tops will message me asking, “You like bbc?” I actually don’t assume the message conveys anything about cock size - I interpret it as shorthand for “Are you willing to have interracial sex with a black man?”

I always answer yes, because I do/am/will, completely regardless of the size of the cock that arrives attached to the man. One of the most liberating decisions I have made in my sexual life was to give my ass to any man who asked for it - applying zero discrimination at all has provided me freedom and opportunity, variety and delight.

I have never been and would never be comfortable using the term “BBC” in the present context, because so much unnecessary value judgment is carried in three letters. I agree with the OP that it’s best to discourage its use.

Unless referring to Her Royal Majesty’s broadcasting service.  Quite.

A BBC we can all get behind!

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On 1/17/2019 at 1:23 AM, DrrAld said:

We’re people; not a fetish.

This couldn’t be stated more perfectly.  I’m Cuban - and I get tired of being hit up all the time by guys in search of a specific stereotype and scripted experience.  Yes I speak Spanish, yes my family are immigrants and yes i’m a totally oversexed horndog....but I’m not your papi, I’m not gonna shake my ass like Ricky Martín for you, and I’m not some horse-hung baseball player with a huge, dark uncut club who’s gonna fuck you into next week.  Enough already.  Being Latin or Black or Asian or Middle Eastern doesn’t make us all picturesque stereotypes to enjoy whenever you feel like adding a little flavor in your sex lives.  We’re real folks with real jobs and real lives and we’re looking for the same things as everyone else.

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