Have You Been Raped as a Child and Became Attracted to Men like your Rapist?

[CA-master]

On ‎1‎/‎29‎/‎2011 at 1:48 AM, SpunkJunkyPissHound said:

Someone stuck their fingers in my ass when I was two, and I loved it (it's one of my first memories). When I was eight, I was nursing on my grandpa's dick, and when I was 12, I had a "boyfriend" ie fuck buddy who was 28. I had been taught to believe that all these men had raped me, but that's bullshit. I had a good time and felt no pain guilt or remorse.

When I was 18, some fucker pozzed me when I was passed out at a Halloween party. That was rape.

Over the course of four years I watched him wither and die, and even though he's been dead for almost 20 years, I would have found a very painful way to kill him, had he not.

Pay attention Stealth-boys- you poison a kid and you deserve to die in a sick and horrible way. My suggestion ... castration followed by forced testicle consumption. Enjoy the fantasy but keep your sick sauce to your self.

I totally agree with you. You just summed it all

[CA-master]

On ‎1‎/‎29‎/‎2011 at 11:37 AM, YorkshireLad said:

I was gang raped at 17, not really as a child, but then raped again at 18 and again at 20! By the third time I was so HOTT for it, that I almost sought it out. Teased those I thought might forcefully take me if I teased then turned them down enough!

How that happened? What the story behind the three? I mean once but three times? And you were 17?

[TheLeshii]

I was molested as a child, and it continued for years. I don't remember it as a bad experience, and I often instigated it. I didn't realize how fucked up it was until I was a teen.

EDIT

Sorry for the edit, but I didn't answer your question. No. I'm not attracted to guys like my molester.

Edited October 11, 2017 by TheLeshii
I didn't answer the question

[YorkshireLad]

On 10/10/2017 at 9:04 PM, CA-master said:

How that happened? What the story behind the three? I mean once but three times? And you were 17?

At 17, i’d gone to my first gay club in Leeds (technically underage but managed to get in). I’d got a little drunk, and went to the toilets. I was confronted by a black man who wouldn’t take no for answer. He dragged me into the cubicle and fucked me.

 

At 18, I was working in a bar, a customer took a shining to me, but I declined his advances several times. He accused me of teasing him while working. One night while walking home he hit me round the back of the head with a bat, to knock me out, took me into the back of a van, and fucked me. I came to mid fuck and tried to fight him off, but couldn’t. He told me I was nothing but a faggot who needed to learn his place. Once he had finished with me, he threw me out of the van, and drove off.

 

At 20, I had taken to seeking out slightly risky guys. I liked rough sex. Word got around. One guy kept trying to make advances on me and boasted about his sexual prowess and that he would fuck me so hard i’d be begging him to stop. I never took him up on his offer, and he tried several times to persuade me to come back to his. I’d just tease him in the bar. One night, he bought me a drink, I drank it and soon found myself barely able to stand, and struggling to remain conscious. He took me out the back door of the bar and over the road to his flat by which time I was unconscious. When I came to I was feeling incredibly paranoid and confused, didn’t know where I was. I had a panic attack which freaked him out, I ran out of his half dressed with my rmtousers in my hands and no shoes on and ran up the street acting freaked out where I was picked up by a police car. Test showed i’d been drugged. I refused to provide details of who was involved or make a statement.

[Guest]

9 hours ago, YorkshireLad said:

 I refused to provide details of who was involved or make a statement.

Just curious, why did you not go trough ? 

[Guest MorganStar]

I ws raped by a man at my dad's VFW post when I was 11....looking back he groomed me, finally isolated me from my parents and the crowd at a event I was volunteering at and raped me in the basement at the FW post while the dance went on upstairs...i was so afraid...like a dear in the headlights..I guess he thought no resistance was consent..I never told anyone...since he was a friend of my dads I saw him often after that but he never tried anything again

[Guest JackWmspt]

Can't say I was raped, but I had my male/male experience at age 7, I met with an older teenager and we would look at the magazines. He and I met daily for several months. At that age I didn't cum but could climax. He never touched me that I can remember, but on a few occasions he did want me to insert my penis into his man-cunt. He was HUGE in both length and thickness, and came what to me back then seemed like a lot of cum. I did enjoy sharing his load, we both eagerly ate it up. As I grew older I did manage to orally service many of the neighbor guys. I'n bi-married now, and still enjoy a good load of man seed whenever I can get it. I'm a total sub-bottom, and love bottoming there isn't anything more wonderful than taking seed balls deep. I can't get past how fantastic it feels to have a man deep within me and leaving his gift.

[fagclit87]

I was used by my aunt's boyfriend when I was 12. I lived with my aunt for a couple years and he would often use my holes. I have never told anyone until now. I do crave verbal abuse, humiliation and aggressive tops to use my pussy. I wonder if these cravings stem from my childhood experiences or not.

[Davidc]

I was alway in to older guys from an early age , I got fucked a few times in my teens ( at that point age of conect 18 or 21)

i normally instigated it and loved it ( and was luck it was concential ) but still technically rape.

now I’m a top

[Dom-Top-Dad]

My boyfriend was molested from age five to fifteen by a cousin and his uncles. They all made him give them BJs. Unfortunately, I don't know much details about it because he (rightly) suspects its a turn-on for me to hear about him being used by them. I've gotten him to start talking about it a few times, but then I ask something that gives my excitement away and he gets pissed and won't say more. It is a traumatic experience for him and he doesn't like thinking about it. We talked in the evening and it kept him sleepless afterward. He is a total bottom and gets the biggest hard-on sucking my cock and cums soon after I start fucking him. But he never initiates sex and I always have to push him a bit. In earlier relationships I know he had to endure some beating - and I'm totally nonviolent and spanking etc. doesn't do anything for me. Sometimes I wonder if he would like me to force him to service me or get fucked by me without consent - but don't know. It would be a turn-on for me! I want to make him my submissive slut (in bed only), but I'm worried he will think I don't love him, just want him for sex - he is quite insecure about that. And I really do love him - a lot!
Thoughts and advice most welcome!!

[tallslenderguy]

2 hours ago, Dom-Top-Dad said:

My boyfriend was molested from age five to fifteen by a cousin and his uncles. They all made him give them BJs. Unfortunately, I don't know much details about it because he (rightly) suspects its a turn-on for me to hear about him being used by them. I've gotten him to start talking about it a few times, but then I ask something that gives my excitement away and he gets pissed and won't say more. It is a traumatic experience for him and he doesn't like thinking about it. We talked in the evening and it kept him sleepless afterward. He is a total bottom and gets the biggest hard-on sucking my cock and cums soon after I start fucking him. But he never initiates sex and I always have to push him a bit. In earlier relationships I know he had to endure some beating - and I'm totally nonviolent and spanking etc. doesn't do anything for me. Sometimes I wonder if he would like me to force him to service me or get fucked by me without consent - but don't know. It would be a turn-on for me! I want to make him my submissive slut (in bed only), but I'm worried he will think I don't love him, just want him for sex - he is quite insecure about that. And I really do love him - a lot!
Thoughts and advice most welcome!!

5 years old is very young and he had no coping mechanisms to help him deal with having his volition violated. Rape isn't so much about sex, more of control and he could very well have PTSD, in which case you forcing him or fucking him without consent could trigger him big time.  He probably would benefit from therapy. If he is "quite insecure" he could very well still be suffering the effects of trauma.  

The fact that he gets pissed off when he sees you are turned on and are excited over him being raped seems pretty good evidence to me that he would not enjoy you doing the same thing as his cousin and uncles did to him.

[grayhoss]

I was raped by several people from 4 to about twelve. I hated it. I am not attracted to anyone resembling my rapists.

It began with my female cousins
I have cerebral palsy and wore a body brace for the first several years of my life. My cousins quickly realized that I couldn't get to my feet once prone, so they started pushing me onto my back, fondling me, forcing fellation on me while fingering my ass, etc. Dad caught them the first time when I was three and warned them to stop, but claimed it must be partly my fault as 'All boys want the pussy'. Needless to say, when I was sent across the street to my grandmother's where the girls stayed each bridge night, they took it as carte blanche .

They began to rape me with the handles of household tools while saying things I didn't understand I was terrified, as I figured that the bleeding meant I'd die. Stupid, but when this began, I was four. They progressed to threatening to hurt me if I didn't perform cunnilingus, and reminded me that Mother beat all the kids in our family if we did anything 'abnormal', so that I wouldn't tell on them.

They later progressed to other forma of abuse like pushing my hands or feel into fireant hills, applying honey or syrup so that palmetto bugs would swarm and bite me, etc. This culminated with them getting me up into a tree on my parents' property and pushing me out when I was eleven. That got them sent back to their mother, where the stepfather gave them the clap and knocked up, so he was caught.

Unfortunately, I tried to go to a local Roman Catholic Church for help when I was about six or seven. The priests there had it in for me because Mother left an extremely violent abusive relationship due to her first husband being an alocholic and drug addict and being prone to beating her and my half siblings. They claimed that remarriage made her a whore, 'whoredom' was an 'inheiritable sin, like the sin of Eve' and that 'God was punishing me for being a whore, by sending people to treat me as I deserved'. If I'd known then that being 'sent flyers' was RCC code for a church that was sent many contact-offender priests to hide their crimes from parishoners, I'd have never tried for help there; but the RCC scandal was decades in the future, at that point.

A local man, a retiree with a need to hurt, humiliate and degrade his victims, used to use eavesdropping by the confessionals as a way to find 'scapegoat' kids like me to abuse. Back in the 70s, a man willing to devote his time free to watch the children of struggling families in the neighborhood could do no wrong; he was trusted implicitly and any adult nearby would just hand us kids over to his dementia-addled wife when she came round and said we were due at her house for babysitting.

She's bring us kids there and he's tell her to walk to the bingo hall, and once she was gone, he'd start scaring or hurting us. I believe he was impotent and only our fear made him functional. He was very fond of threatening us with his pistol. He was an amatuer photgrapher, and took 'trophy' pictures of us during his abuse sessions. As I had childhood-epilepsy, he became very aroused when the flash would trigger a seizure in me. I often came out of one to find him sexually assaulting me or threatening me with the handgun. This went on till he committed suicide when I was almost 9.

A few months later his wife founds the trophies and called my father in a panic. He got her to burn them, but he saw the photos of me and decided I was a willing participant who had been desperate for sex and had somehow 'corrupted or seduced' his friend 'Because thats what you queers all do to straight guys.' Dad started encouraging my mother's beatings of me, because he thought that would turn me straight or 'fix my morals' or something. She was trying to beat the disability out of me anyway I'd tried telling her about the lesser abuses of my cousins but it was too 'abnormal' and she'd beat or hit me 'for lying'.

[Guest]

I was raped at 9 and it continued for years.  There are elements of that time that I am attracted to now, like the rough sex, the uber-masculine guys, hairy, big dick, ruthless.  While I was going through it, I never would have thought that though.

[Guest JackWmspt]

Can't say that I was raped, but at age 7 I used to meet with an older kid an played with each other daily for several months. Due to my age I didn't cum, but could climax. He was about 16 had a huge cock, and I loved sucking and licking it. When he came we both shared his cum eagerly licking it up. Prior to that though I used to fantasize about wrestling nude with boys my age. I went for several years not touching another guy, then the interest sparked again. I've been active sucking guys off for a long time, and started letting men fuck me in 2015. Now, I see myself as a sub-bottom here to please other men letting them use my body for what ever pleasure they seek. I'm not into reciprocation at all, and only please, I love being a cum dump pig, and all facets of cum and cum play.

[Pozguyinchi]

I don’t feel I was raped but I guess it was molestation. At 10 I started having a relationship with my step father. It was very sensual at first with a lot of touching and sucking on nipples and eventually me on his dick. I was 12 almost 13 the first time he bred me. I can only say it felt natural and I didn’t feel dirty at all. We made love almost daily until I went off to college. I eventually found a boyfriend in college. Much older and poz. He converted me. After that my dad never made love to me again. It was so confusing for me. I now tend to go for men that resemble my dad.