Do have boyfriends?

[Sharp-edge]

I was curious. Is it possible for an escort to have a boyfriend? I mean in terms of looks, i suppose an escort should have the package, but don't we tend to be posessive even if it's just a little? I was wondering about the emotional impact that this could have on them. Using sex for money (which i think it's useful because it allows people to have sex even iff they are not attractive) doesn't make the whole sex for pleasure thing vanish? On the other hand, if they do have a bf, i suppose he would be someone [banned word] (maybe me) who would think that it's kinda twisted (but in an intriguing way) who would ask them how does it feel and what they do. Or even further to that, they would make paid videos together.. sothe whole thing is, can an escort have a bf like the other people? Without being someone's fetish? And a bonus question. Can a straight guy be an escort for guys? But i mean being professional at the same time. Not reading "i hate it but money talks" on his body.

[Guest]

Yes. Why not?

But I get a sense you wouldn't be happy with having an escort as a boyfriend maybe.

[Guest]

Everyone is different, but for my ways of thinking, I'd think it would be hott having a BF escorting.  Of course for the most part of my life I've been around pay for play individuals and see nothing wrong with it what so ever, it's just a job to most. My first wife did it when we were first married and it was hott knowing she would come home loaded and a bit richer after a nite out. As I said though, everyone is different in thinking.

[akula]

I'd date an escort no problem, I'd be turned on that other guys pay him for sex but when all is said and done he comes home to me.

[SFCumdog]

15 hours ago, akula said:

I'd date an escort no problem, I'd be turned on that other guys pay him for sex but when all is said and done he comes home to me.

yup. definitely agree with that. And the fact that he chooses to come home to you afterwards is what makes all the difference. Escorts are people too and want the same things we all do. 

[drscorpio]

Moderator's Note: Please review this thread before you post again in this discussion. We are fine at the moment; this discussion falls under "talking about the problems of being an escort." Because of FOSTA/SESTA, we have to watch what we say about escorts and escorting. 

 

[Sharp-edge]

3 minutes ago, drscorpio said:

Moderator's Note: Please review this thread before you post again in this discussion. We are fine at the moment; this discussion falls under "talking about the problems of being an escort." Because of FOSTA/SESTA, we have to watch what we say about escorts and escorting. 

 

okay, thanks for the advice. However I believe this thread is kinda "social" in terms of how an escort's personal life is affected, more like a social phenomenon.

[drscorpio]

7 hours ago, Sharp-edge said:

okay, thanks for the advice. However I believe this thread is kinda "social" in terms of how an escort's personal life is affected, more like a social phenomenon.

Everything so far has been totally cool. I just wanted to remind everyone that this is a touchy area that we have to be extra careful around. 

[BlondBttm]

Sex work is work, just like any other job. Escort, adult film star etc, are JOBS - sources of income and a means to support oneself and ones family.  Plenty of people are capable of separating "sex" from "making love". A sex workers job shouldn't be fetishized or demeaned because its sex work. If you are not capable of being in a relationship with someone because of their job or career, then that person is not right for you...

[BootmanLA]

On 6/1/2021 at 12:11 PM, Sharp-edge said:

Can an escort have a bf like the other people? Without being someone's fetish? And a bonus question. Can a straight guy be an escort for guys? But i mean being professional at the same time. Not reading "i hate it but money talks" on his body.

Yes, of course he "can" - assuming that he and the boyfriend are both mature enough to handle the situation. As you note, there can be problems from two directions, either the boyfriend resenting the fact that his partner is having sex with others, OR the boyfriend objectifying and fetishizing his partner as a sex worker (including those people who answered "it would be hot for my BF to do that"). I think it is probably hard to find someone who doesn't do one or the other - who views his partner's escorting as "just a job" like being a file clerk or a water or a nurse or a software developer.

As for the bonus question: yes, that too is possible, but probably unlikely to be commonplace. The reality is that most people don't "love" their jobs - a lot of people "like" their jobs, a lot "tolerate" their jobs, and a significant number hate their jobs but don't have a lot of options (or are unwilling to do what it takes to change the job). The problem is that if the "straight" escort really enjoys his job, he's probably not really completely straight. And if he IS completely straight, I suspect he wouldn't be a particularly good escort with other men.

[BlackDude]

What’s a boyfriend?

[MuscledHorse]

yes you can. Both my other half and I view sexual monogamy to be unnatural to the male animal. Monogamy is, in fact, the exception not the rue in the animal kingdom. The result is a non-toxic relationship because we have no jealousy there. It's just sex between 2 horny animals. That allows the relationship to actually flourish rather than be bound up in the toxic jealousy of the other that Xian based relationships actually hinge on: have sex with anyone else and everything about our relationship was totally false.  The idea of "cheating" is an extension of that jealousy foundation and is toxic in the end. We re both promiscuous (me way more than him) and he has been the camera guy on many of my porn shoots. But, at the end of the day, we know the other is Number One in out lives and we don't let DNA drivers for sex ruin it. I am happy in the sex industry and that I cam allowed to bring pleasure to so many guys and to have a partner who thinks s I do and not just allows it, but encourages it. More males would find happy relationships if they did-Xianized their relationships and separated the sex from the Love; they are not the synonyms religious dogmatists have been made out to be.

[Bicycledude]

So well put. Wish more people had this attitude 😈🐷💦👅

[BootmanLA]

15 hours ago, MuscledHorse said:

yes you can. Both my other half and I view sexual monogamy to be unnatural to the male animal. Monogamy is, in fact, the exception not the rue in the animal kingdom. The result is a non-toxic relationship because we have no jealousy there. It's just sex between 2 horny animals. That allows the relationship to actually flourish rather than be bound up in the toxic jealousy of the other that Xian based relationships actually hinge on: have sex with anyone else and everything about our relationship was totally false.  The idea of "cheating" is an extension of that jealousy foundation and is toxic in the end. We re both promiscuous (me way more than him) and he has been the camera guy on many of my porn shoots. But, at the end of the day, we know the other is Number One in out lives and we don't let DNA drivers for sex ruin it. I am happy in the sex industry and that I cam allowed to bring pleasure to so many guys and to have a partner who thinks s I do and not just allows it, but encourages it. More males would find happy relationships if they did-Xianized their relationships and separated the sex from the Love; they are not the synonyms religious dogmatists have been made out to be.

It's undoubtedly true that monogamy is the exception, not the rule, in the animal kingdom.

That said, because something is "uncommon" in the natural world doesn't mean it's unsuitable for us. Upright bipedalism, for instance, is essentially absent from all of our closest animal relatives. That doesn't suggest we should naturally be going on all fours most of the time. Most of our relatives are herbivores, but that doesn't mean our animal-heavy diet is unnatural.

While it's sometimes questionable to think so, given the behavior of people in this world, we are ostensibly a more evolved species, with non-biological reasons for doing many things. This is not to say that monogamy is good (or bad, or indifferent), but the fact is that as an evolved species, we have much more of an ability to shift our behavior based on agreed-upon social norms. In the animal world, for instance, there's no real sense of private property belonging to the individual, and animals will routinely steal food from each other to feed themselves and their offspring. Birds that collect objects, like many corvids, will steal from one another right and left. That behavior may be "natural", but as an evolved species we (mostly) recognize the need to curb that impulse for the good of all. 

So evaluate monogamy among humans not in the "natural" context but the social one. If it doesn't offer advantages to you and your partner(s), you don't have to practice it. Denigrating it as "unnatural", however, is no more valid than saying that taking a dump in a toilet is "unnatural" given that most animals just shit wherever they want.

[MuscledHorse]

7 hours ago, BootmanLA said:

It's undoubtedly true that monogamy is the exception, not the rule, in the animal kingdom.

That said, because something is "uncommon" in the natural world doesn't mean it's unsuitable for us. Upright bipedalism, for instance, is essentially absent from all of our closest animal relatives. That doesn't suggest we should naturally be going on all fours most of the time. Most of our relatives are herbivores, but that doesn't mean our animal-heavy diet is unnatural.

While it's sometimes questionable to think so, given the behavior of people in this world, we are ostensibly a more evolved species, with non-biological reasons for doing many things. This is not to say that monogamy is good (or bad, or indifferent), but the fact is that as an evolved species, we have much more of an ability to shift our behavior based on agreed-upon social norms. In the animal world, for instance, there's no real sense of private property belonging to the individual, and animals will routinely steal food from each other to feed themselves and their offspring. Birds that collect objects, like many corvids, will steal from one another right and left. That behavior may be "natural", but as an evolved species we (mostly) recognize the need to curb that impulse for the good of all. 

So evaluate monogamy among humans not in the "natural" context but the social one. If it doesn't offer advantages to you and your partner(s), you don't have to practice it. Denigrating it as "unnatural", however, is no more valid than saying that taking a dump in a toilet is "unnatural" given that most animals just shit wherever they want.

Monogamy does work for some, but in my experience that is a minority, if males were given the option, based on the number of married guys I've had sex with. Essentially it is a straight jacket the Xian church forced upon society, when It should be  choice. If sexual monogamy worked so well we should not have the divorce rates and break ups over "cheating" that we see, and we'd be missing half the country music output as well as most of Taylor Swift's catalog. 😉