Bottoms outnumbering tops

[BBdaddybear]

On 6/22/2021 at 1:26 PM, Sospiro said:

I’m a total cumdump bottom that doesn’t top, but I love playing with other cumdump bottoms, especially after a night of mutually collecting loads.

Lots of hot options, my favs include 69 felching (eating each other’s cum-filled pussies), scissoring with a double-ended dildo (surprised more bottoms don’t try this, best way for mutual anal orgasms IMO), and mutual fist / foot fucking / worship.

Bottoms know best how to satisfy each other’s pussies.

Would love to share my huge double dildo with you.  Would be so hot to sit in a two-sided sling and rocking back and forth for a hot night at the baths and only taking breaks when tops want to breed one of is or both of us.  Love when I’m sharing my dildo and we gobble each side until our ass lips meet and kiss. Preferably wet cum-soaked kisses.  

[Riotboi81]

From my perspective as a side, perhaps I just look at it in a different way but I feel that as creative as we LGBT members are, when it comes to sex we can be very hard-nosed sometimes. I mean it's so funny to me how most people make intercourse the main focus of sex. There's so many other things you can do. There's so many other ways you can get off. I always feel strange because I never ever felt intercourse was necessary. Actually I'd prefer (as a side) not to have intercourse at all. Because when try to top, I can't feel anything, And as much as I love to say I could bottom: 1. I don't care for the sensation and 2. I'm picky about my shoes and those just go in my feet lol.

[ktopper]

8 hours ago, Riotboi81 said:

From my perspective as a side, perhaps I just look at it in a different way but I feel that as creative as we LGBT members are, when it comes to sex we can be very hard-nosed sometimes. I mean it's so funny to me how most people make intercourse the main focus of sex. There's so many other things you can do. There's so many other ways you can get off. I always feel strange because I never ever felt intercourse was necessary. Actually I'd prefer (as a side) not to have intercourse at all. Because when try to top, I can't feel anything, And as much as I love to say I could bottom: 1. I don't care for the sensation and 2. I'm picky about my shoes and those just go in my feet lol.

Interesting take on sex. We seem to be total opposites. For me intercourse IS my main focus. That applies to both men and women, I am technically bi. And as for gay sex, it applies whether topping or bottoming. I haven't bottomed for several decades but when I did it was all about getting fucked. Topping a guy is my ultimate sexual pleasure.

I do like to suck dick, usually when I know I'm going to fuck someone latter. Maybe that doesn't count as real intercourse. But when it comes to me receiving a BJ from another guy I would really rather just breed him.

I'm not criticizing you, I guess I just don't really understand your preferences. But I find it interesting, as I tend to do with what I don't understand.

[Hungryforbbc]

This is actually simple - good dick has always been much harder to find than good ass. That’s why you rarely see bottom escorts or hustlers. These days even women pay for good dick cause it’s more and more difficult to find.

[hungry_hole]

8 hours ago, Hungryforbbc said:

This is actually simple - good dick has always been much harder to find than good ass.

This has been true in general,

But I remember the 90's as my best times as a bareback bottom, before ART and PrEP were available. In those days most bottoms did not bareback, and if they did, they would make sure the top pulled out before shooting.

I decided to start barebacking and taking loads which made me known at the local sauna. As soon as I arrived some guys who had bred me before would remind me that they would be around later. It was because they knew that once they were ready to shoot, my hole was ready for their load.

[PozBearWI]

2 hours ago, hungry_hole said:

This has been true in general,

But I remember the 90's as my best times as a bareback bottom, before ART and PrEP were available. In those days most bottoms did not bareback, and if they did, they would make sure the top pulled out before shooting.

I decided to start barebacking and taking loads which made me known at the local sauna. As soon as I arrived some guys who had bred me before would remind me that they would be around later. It was because they knew that once they were ready to shoot, my hole was ready for their load.

In the 90's when more tested I would inquire about that.  I made a half assed attempt at serosorting.  By the 80's I already had HPV and HSV.  

[BlindRawFucker1]

You always hear about the large numbers of bottoms as compared to tops.  What percentage of guys are vers?

[polyglutton]

Until I see peer-reviewed data, I put this "more bottoms than tops" stuff down to confirmation bias and internalised bottom-shaming. We have a long way to go with these two problems.

[NWUSHorny]

1 hour ago, BlindRawFucker1 said:

You always hear about the large numbers of bottoms as compared to tops.  What percentage of guys are vers?

My personal experience is there, will always be more fucking at a venue that attract men who are actively being versatile, and since I'm verse I love that. However in some area there seems to be an idea that you should commit to being one of the other at least for a period of time, which is extremely detrimental. Unfortunately it is an idea that seems to be spreading.

On 10/2/2024 at 10:44 AM, Riotboi81 said:

From my perspective as a side, perhaps I just look at it in a different way but I feel that as creative as we LGBT members are, when it comes to sex we can be very hard-nosed sometimes. I mean it's so funny to me how most people make intercourse the main focus of sex. There's so many other things you can do. There's so many other ways you can get off. I always feel strange because I never ever felt intercourse was necessary. Actually I'd prefer (as a side) not to have intercourse at all. Because when try to top, I can't feel anything, And as much as I love to say I could bottom: 1. I don't care for the sensation and 2. I'm picky about my shoes and those just go in my feet lol.

Do you live or have you ever visited the PNW? It seems like it would be heaven on earth for guys who do not consider penetrative intercourse the main event. It is an extremely frustrating place to live for those of us who need to either penetrate or be penetrated to meet our needs. Most guys here know at least a thousand and one ways to have really great gay "sex" without actually having anything that I recognize as sex or in many cases even involving the penis.

Edited October 3, 2024 by NWUSHorny

[Spunkinmyarse]

30 minutes ago, polyglutton said:

Until I see peer-reviewed data, I put this "more bottoms than tops" stuff down to confirmation bias and internalised bottom-shaming. We have a long way to go with these two problems.

Yeah, I kind of agree with that- it’s all part of the “bottoms are worthless trash, whereas tops are special” kind of narrative that I’ve never bought into.

In my experience there’s a pretty even balance- sure, clubs can get bottom-heavy towards the end of the night when all the tops have shot their wads and gone home, but to counter that, there are often more tops than bottoms in more natural settings such as cruising grounds.

[BlindRawFucker1]

I’ve never understood the bias towards bottoms.

 

Tops need bottoms, and bottoms need tops.

 

Just be yourself and enjoy.  Don’t be what you think the gay community wants or thinks you should be.

[Hungryforbbc]

2 hours ago, BlindRawFucker1 said:

I’ve never understood the bias towards bottoms.

 

Tops need bottoms, and bottoms need tops.

 

Just be yourself and enjoy.  Don’t be what you think the gay community wants or thinks you should be.

Fully agree- but the reality is that the market values dick more than ass. You want data? Look at the escort sites. Guys have always been willing to pay for dick and now even women are paying for it. Ass is a dime a dozen - why pay for it when it’s so easy to find? 
 

i do think some of it comes down to the work. Bottoms have to prepare properly but tops have to perform. Its a lot easier to be passive than active that’s not opinion its physics. So he who carries more responsibility in the experience holds the power. Also there’s the issue of how we  apply the labels. For example we are generally more likely to categorize someone as a bottom if they clearly enjoy taking dick even if they’re really vers. Meanwhile if we find out that a so-called top enjoys taking dick we shame them and it somehow reduces our desire for them to top us. I am guilty of this myself- I don’t like the idea of being a bottom’s bottom. I’ve done it and it’s been a roll of the dice- some guys who have bottomed before but identify as tops here a unique insight into the experience of bottoming and no interest in doing it again. They tend to be excellent tops in my experience. However since tops are in more demand - especially the super masculine straight types- lots of vers and even femme bottoms present themselves as tops and subsequently tend to disappoint since they’re really not that into it. 
 

its definitely a complicated issue and I appreciate the OP starting the conversation. I’m definitely interested in l more about others experiences and thoughts on the subject as I have always found the dynamics fascinating.  As someone who has basically always identified as at least mostly a bottom and more recently embraced my total bottom preference, but who has been in some vers/vers relationships and explored the full spectrum of sexual preferences, I think it’s paramount that we are honest with ourselves and don’t feel ashamed of our identities or preferences. Im now a proud power bottom and I like to serve masculine, at least mostly unaffected black top men, whether they identify as straight or not as long as they have a dick and like to use it.  If you enjoy sucking dick i can be okay with you identifying as a top but if you like getting plowed ad much or more than using your dick ,it’s much more difficult for me to see you as the dominant man I want on my back.

just truth from my perspective- I have a lot of personal experience and yet I’m still fascinated by the sociological aspects of this dynamic.
 

[PozBearWI]

For the majority of my adult life I've been verse.  And in fact I've a strong preference.  Flip fucking was my particular pleasure.  ED has of course done a great job of fucking that up.  Thankfully sometimes I can.  But sometimes it just isn't an option for me.  

[PozToxVersPig]

4 hours ago, NWUSHorny said:

Do you live or have you ever visited the PNW? It seems like it would be heaven on earth for guys who do not consider penetrative intercourse the main event. It is an extremely frustrating place to live for those of us who need to either penetrate or be penetrated to meet our needs. Most guys here know at least a thousand and one ways to have really great gay "sex" without actually having anything that I recognize as sex or in many cases even involving the penis.

As a Seattle native and someone who lived there up until 7 years ago, I literally choked on my water reading this.  I'm not even sure that it's just "penetrative" intercourse but sex.  This gave me a great laugh.  Maybe this is why in the early 2000s I sought out the people in the dark corners of Seattle...and kept my friends as friends.

The advantage Seattle has is the bathhouses and a few other public places where us outcasts could connect without a green tea cleans followed by a farm to table dinner followed by Gilmore Gills while wearing our underwear.

[barefucker44]

7 hours ago, NWUSHorny said:

My personal experience is there, will always be more fucking at a venue that attract men who are actively being versatile, and since I'm verse I love that. However in some area there seems to be an idea that you should commit to being one of the other at least for a period of time, which is extremely detrimental. Unfortunately it is an idea that seems to be spreading.

Do you live or have you ever visited the PNW? It seems like it would be heaven on earth for guys who do not consider penetrative intercourse the main event. It is an extremely frustrating place to live for those of us who need to either penetrate or be penetrated to meet our needs. Most guys here know at least a thousand and one ways to have really great gay "sex" without actually having anything that I recognize as sex or in many cases even involving the penis.

How can anyone have great sex unless tops breed btms?