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What’s up with dudes who don’t want it raw?


Jose

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  • 3 months later...

For whatever it's worth...my 2 cents:

  • Someone who follows through on their claims and actually "breed" (ejaculate unprotected into) an essentially unknown or anonymous man outside of monogamy in our current social, religious, and cultural environment is worthy of claiming the "title" BREEDER
  • This is not everyone, and I would guess that most are members of this site.
  • Finding a BREEDER is not as easy as I thought it would be. I find that a lot of men (I interact with) are already in a relationship and cannot risk introducing any STIs back into the relationship. This produces the necessity for condoms.
  • Many reasonable men are not prepared to blow-up their "world" and current relationship for some random dudes load. Even though I think they would if they could get away with it (see previous point).

Perhaps this statement will be inflammatory, but IMHO the reason most "reasonable" men are NOT breeding one another is because of the RISK associated to random, anonymous, M4M sex in contracting all sorts of unpleasant STIs. If sexually active men were part of the pro-active solution to reducing the transmission and spread of these diseases - I think breeding would see a revival - perhaps a renaissance.

Sadly it seems that we allow ignorance to run rampant in this space.

Unfortunately, I am sad that the fetishisization of bug chasing translates into actual behaviour which is self-destructive and undermines everyones else's pleasaure for unprotected sex. So until the risk of STIs is gone - it seems that you're really asking a guy what his comfort level is with getting a disease and whether the sex is pleasurable enough for them to take or make that risk assessment.

Thoughts?

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24 minutes ago, anonCUMtainer said:

Perhaps this statement will be inflammatory, but IMHO the reason most "reasonable" men are NOT breeding one another is because of the RISK associated to random, anonymous, M4M sex in contracting all sorts of unpleasant STIs. If sexually active men were part of the pro-active solution to reducing the transmission and spread of these diseases - I think breeding would see a revival - perhaps a renaissance.

Sadly it seems that we allow ignorance to run rampant in this space.

Unfortunately, I am sad that the fetishisization of bug chasing translates into actual behaviour which is self-destructive and undermines everyones else's pleasaure for unprotected sex. So until the risk of STIs is gone - it seems that you're really asking a guy what his comfort level is with getting a disease and whether the sex is pleasurable enough for them to take or make that risk assessment.

Thoughts?

I am absolutely certain the idea that it's understandable that a guy wouldn't want to go for raw anon sex isn't going to be popular here (the fact that people use the term "condom Nazis" would be unfathomable to me if I weren't so jaded). There is definite risk assessment in play here and I get that, even in the age of PrEP and DoxyPEP, there's still Hep C to worry about plus plenty of guys who will intentionally do you and others harm if they can. I'm not here to add anything to what you said. I'm just here so you know at least some other people who take random anon loads do understand where the condom crew is coming from and don't fault them for it even if I'm skipping them on hookup apps.

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I make it very clear You are going to fuck me with no condom and cum in my ass. No if and or buts If you don’t agree fine just don’t come over Sometimes guys don’t relate to breeding They do when I say you are going to cum in my ass No pullouts 

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My last hookup was like this.  Guy talked a big game about me going in bare and creamping his hole.  I get there and he's got a condom beside him as he's bend over.  Ended up pulling out and busting on his ass and hole and smearing it all over his hole with my cock. 

 

 

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19 hours ago, anonCUMtainer said:

For whatever it's worth...my 2 cents:

  • Someone who follows through on their claims and actually "breed" (ejaculate unprotected into) an essentially unknown or anonymous man outside of monogamy in our current social, religious, and cultural environment is worthy of claiming the "title" BREEDER
  • This is not everyone, and I would guess that most are members of this site.
  • Finding a BREEDER is not as easy as I thought it would be. I find that a lot of men (I interact with) are already in a relationship and cannot risk introducing any STIs back into the relationship. This produces the necessity for condoms.
  • Many reasonable men are not prepared to blow-up their "world" and current relationship for some random dudes load. Even though I think they would if they could get away with it (see previous point).

Perhaps this statement will be inflammatory, but IMHO the reason most "reasonable" men are NOT breeding one another is because of the RISK associated to random, anonymous, M4M sex in contracting all sorts of unpleasant STIs. If sexually active men were part of the pro-active solution to reducing the transmission and spread of these diseases - I think breeding would see a revival - perhaps a renaissance.

Sadly it seems that we allow ignorance to run rampant in this space.

Unfortunately, I am sad that the fetishisization of bug chasing translates into actual behaviour which is self-destructive and undermines everyones else's pleasaure for unprotected sex. So until the risk of STIs is gone - it seems that you're really asking a guy what his comfort level is with getting a disease and whether the sex is pleasurable enough for them to take or make that risk assessment.

Thoughts?

I think this a great synapsis.

Maybe some of you won't have sex with a guy if they insist on using condoms, I will but actively avoid having sex with intentional bugchasers.

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On 4/16/2024 at 6:03 PM, anonCUMtainer said:

This produces the necessity for condoms.

Actually, no it doesn't.  

The choice to pursue 'outside' sex between the two men is what necessitates condom use (to mitigate contracting std's).  The assumption that any/every pair of men that form a relationship must therefore also fuck outside the relationship is faulty.  There are tons of gay men in "closed", happy, fulfilling relationships, 

On 4/16/2024 at 6:03 PM, anonCUMtainer said:

IMHO the reason most "reasonable" men are NOT breeding one another is because of the RISK associated to random, anonymous, M4M sex in contracting all sorts of unpleasant STIs.

It's hardly inflammatory, and one common through the various threads.  Most sexually active gay men take advantage of the medical advances (PrEP, for instance), and reduce the risks of hiv substantially.  Most men don't "pursue" the lesser infections, and get tested / treated regularly against them.  I suppose one could argue that some men don't have sex at all, for fear of std's, and my response to that mindset is, there's risk in everything we do.  

I don't know where you live (the Golden Horseshoe used to be a pancake-house chain, as I recall?), and I'm not asking.  That said, if there's a dearth of Breeders wherever you live I'm sorry to know that.  That said, I can absolutely assure you that there definitely are men Breeding each other, and have been for a number of years, given the advances in the medical arts.  I haven't so much as seen a condom in any of the fuckjoints around here, and there are plenty of them. 

Perhaps that's because most men that are sexually active (with many partners) make the choice to protect themselves as much as possible against the std's, while maintaining their sexual lives.  Perhaps it's because there are a lot of men who simply won't give up their lust for raw sex.  

Merely living our lives is about choosing between different courses of action, how we decide to find our "place" in this life. 

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38 minutes ago, hntnhole said:

That said, I can absolutely assure you that there definitely are men Breeding each other, and have been for a number of years, given the advances in the medical arts.  I haven't so much as seen a condom in any of the fuckjoints around here, and there are plenty of them. 

Perhaps that's because most men that are sexually active (with many partners) make the choice to protect themselves as much as possible against the std's, while maintaining their sexual lives.  Perhaps it's because there are a lot of men who simply won't give up their lust for raw sex.  

Merely living our lives is about choosing between different courses of action, how we decide to find our "place" in this life. 

I don't think we "disagree" - this is mostly semantics.

The OP was asking what is preventing men from indulging in RAW sex. You basically confirmed that those who are - have accepted the RISKS, or have a life-style that accommodates this type of risk. We are talking about everyone else... 

My point remains - that all the tools and technology exist (today, in 2024) to get tested and to KNOW one's STI status. We also have modern medicine to treat or manage most all infections. The presence of STI's is still the driving FACTOR behind why a person would choose [at the last minute] to reach for the condom, even if they desire raw sex.

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Reading this, it sounds as if guys are thinking that anyone who doesn’t want it bare is flawed.  Isn’t that a bit judgmental if that is the case?

 

PREP might prevent HIV, but it doesn’t stop the other bugs.  Guys might not want to put up with those, or can’t afford the medical costs of treating them.

 

Also, they might not like the mess of bare fucking, whether top or bottom.

 

Of course, that is always something that concerns me.  I would most likely throw up if I slid into a nasty hole.  Luckily, that hasn’t happened yet.

 

So, think about criticizing other’s likes or dislikes with which you don’t agree.  Just don’t fuck with them.  No need to make them feel humiliated or less of a person.

 

Just my two cents.

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All well said above.  In so many domains we really seem to get into foisting our opinion on what everyone else should do.  If a guy insists on condom sex with me and I'm not agreeable to that, then I don't have sex with him.  No need to shame. I understand he wishes to influence his risk that way and that is his to do.  If he starts to try to 'rip me a new one' because he thinks I am a cheap whore (and typically I respond to that with a 'fuck right I am asshole') we can go our separate ways.  Mostly it never proves to be an issue.  A guy sets his limits we hopefully reply "thanks".  

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21 hours ago, PozBearWI said:

In so many domains we really seem to get into foisting our opinion on what everyone else should do.

Well said, and it applies across the board.  We only get to decide what we'll do with our bodies, (or any other issue at hand, for that matter), and since we'd like our limits/viewpoints/decisions respected, it obviously follows that we respect others limits/viewpoints/decisions with the same respect we would appreciate towards ours.  

It's really simple.  Respect others viewpoints, and they'll most likely respect ours.  

Edited by hntnhole
phrasing
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