bearbandit

As usual, 'slut, we're agreeing with each other from different ends of the spectrum. The only thing I'd take issue with is the thing that Tiger pointed out (that I'd missed in my original post): his partners agreed to raw sex. They made their choices. Of course, if we're talking rape it's a whole different ballgame...

It's ridiculous. He's legally an adult: just co-incidence that high school education continues into adulthood as far as I can see. It's none of the school's business what else he does as long as it's legal. If he was selling coke to the juniors they'd have a case, but this... <spit - and not in a good way>

Tiger, thank you for pointing up the obvious which I should have said in my reply...

The article doesn't mention whether he was on meds at the time, or what his viral load was. Rather than leaping straight to legal proceedings, wouldn't a psychological evaluation first be a good idea? It's possible he has a psychological condition whereby he doesn't actually realise the danger of what he's doing, in which case treatment of the condition is a much smarter idea than prosecution. I wonder especially because he filmed so much sex: if he had a concept that he was doing something wrong, why keep the damning evidence of the videos? If I lived in Missouri I sure as hell wouldn't video myself having sex with anyone, given Missouri's less than progressive approach to HIV. It could be that he did what he did with full knowledge of what he was doing, but we don't know that. This is trial by news media and demonisation of people with HIV.

I never talk about something I'm not prepared to discuss further... The basic answer is sheer fucking luck. I tested in 1987 and started low dose AZT monotherapy in 89. After that it was a question of lurching from drug to drug. I went on the nevirapine trial because it was the only way to get 3TC, which meant that at least I'd be taking one extra drug. I had a year or so in the nineties of a double figure CD4 count. That changed when the protease inhibitors started, even though they were prescribed in massive overdoses (how I got diabetes and lost my libido for ten or so years: high dose ritonavir). When my partner died in 2007 I thought that no adherence was safer than bad adherence so went on a drug holiday for seven months. I went from my highest ever CD4 (888) to about 200 in that time. That was about the end of the time when they thought treatment holidays were possible - they aren't. But as others have said, today's drugs are the safest, most effective ever. Thinking back through the people I know I can think of only one guy I know who's had HIV longer than me - again he remembered his seroconversion illness and because of other issues they had frozen blood samples and one from 1979 tested positive.

Theoretical question or has this happened? If you were planning on getting pozzed, I'd say wait till the hep B has cleared (which it does for about 80%(?) of guys). And if you're chasing, give your liver a chance to rest before resuming. Of the guys who don't clear it, a most end up with Chronic hepatitis, whereby they may not show any symptoms (apart from in blood tests), but they are infectious. Death from hepatitis B happens, but it's pretty rare. If it's something that has happened, you need to take a bit extra care of yourself, as most HIV drugs are dealt with by the liver and can put extra strain on the liver. I had hep B eight or nine years after I got HIV, but cleared it without drug treatment. According to wikipedia, there are seven drugs that can stop hep B virus from replicating and thus causing further damage (two of them, lamivudine and tenofovir, are used in HIV treatment). You'll know if you're over-doing it: vomiting, jaundice (which is caused by the liver over producing bilirubin and is a side effect of the protease inhibitor atazanavir (Reyataz), weakness, tiredness, and a sensation that something is trying to escape from your rib cage. If you drink, go dry for a while and lower the amount of fat in your diet (both of which will reduce the stress on your liver). It's over 20 years since I had hep B and even though there's some damage there, in general terms I'm fine. If I drink too much or eat too much fatty food I get a pain in my side, that's all. I've even managed to keep my antibodies to it, which means I don't need the inoculation...

There's little I can say that the others haven't said here, and besides the American health system confuses the hell out of me. HIV drugs are no longer something you "survive" any longer. There's sufficient choice of drugs that if you do test positive, if one combination turns out not to suit you, you can switch to another combination. I know a guy who's been on one of his three-a-day for eleven years. Plus a number of the newer drugs are coming out of patent, which means generics will be available at a much lower price. One suggestion: keep a piece of paper by your computer and each time someone mentions how long they've had HIV, make a note of how many years they've lived with it. You'll be surprised at how long some of us have been poz. Put me down for 34 years.

My seroconversion was so mild that I forgot about it for thirty years. I may have felt a bit crappy as it was going on, but there's no mistaking the rash. Once in a new host, HIV sets about multiplying like crazy: however, it takes the body some time to notice that there's something amiss. Yes, a single load can contain enough HIV to establish a new infection, but it's going to take a while for the virus to produce enough copies of itself for the body to start reacting. A few days isn't anywhere near long enough. Plus there's the fact that his VL was undetectable. While his cum may still contain some HIV it's not in enough quantity to establish a new infection. Wait a couple more weeks and set your mind at rest with a test...

Personal taste. That's all there is to it. And I have tried it so I do know what I'd be "missing out" on.

I wouldn't have commented if the answer was "no"

Good Cub! Hope you end up in the start immediately group. And thank you for volunteering to take part in the study at all. Please, keep us informed on your progress (with mucky stories if they're there!!) Wishing you the best of luck!

Any sort of of verbalising like this is "merely" acting out. I put "merely" in perverted commas because it can have a huge impact. It's not an exact parallel but it was "re-enacting" being raped as a teenager that got me to accept it. If I was fucking with a guy of another race than me and racist abuse become involved - if he gets off on it, why not. I will admit to needing some closure to scene, a reminder that it was only play, in the same way that I needed it when I was acting out my rape. The great thing about role play is that we can act out our darkest fantasies in safety...

Good to know someone got the joke and the point... ;-) And @hollywoodslut - I'd been meaning to reply to you your remark for a while but forgot where it was: We're always preaching to the choir, you and I, we just got different approaches!

Popper me up and watch me pig out...

Go the body shape that you feel at home in. I started weights because they provided a way to disguise lipodystrophy. Nothing can shift the gathering of fat in the gut or the buffalo hump, so I concentrated on upper body work, aiming at what a friend described as a "rugby player who likes a drink". I went up a chest size or two, and distract from the buffalo hump by having my biohazard there. I've not been working out since last year's illness but have regained the 40 pounds I lost and much of it has remembered it was supposed to be muscle. The acid test is when you can look in a full length mirror and think "yeah, I'd do me."

Or he guys who are fifteen years older than their photos. I've always liked older men - it's the lying I can't stand. There was one guy who'd managed to get circumcised and have it heal completely. If I'd seen more recent photos I'd have been just as enthusiastic (possibly more so). And I'd far rather have a face shot: by now I know what a dick and an asshole look like!

If you're on your back, you roll you head to one side and sniff as usual, making sure the bottle remains upright. I still have nasal damage from an ex who decided to "help" at the beginning of last year...

Believe me, if I get the viagra dose right I'm hard and unable to cum for hours... but be prepared to be woken at some ungodly hour by a dick in your ass ;-)

I was in my early thirties when I started getting the Daddy looks in the Coleherne in London. Of course it helped that my partner at the time looked like my identical twin (should have gone into porn) and we had a habit of bringing a spare crash helmet for our Sunday afternoons in the woods somewhere south of London, so the boy of the day got a load in his mouth and one up his ass. Or sometimes two in his ass - depended on how things went. Age is immaterial - what matters is attitude...

Cialis does nothing for me (and I have several embarrassing episodes to prove it!). I've not trying buying it over the counter - being Welsh, which means free prescriptions all round, it never occurred to me. Just had a look over a recent packet and it doesn't have the POM (prescription only medicine) mark on it... Thanks for the heads up

Colour me interested. I have diabetes and HIV so my free viagra (it's not available on the NHS here unless you have diabetes) is limited to four 25mg tabs per month. Being diabetic - all that testing for glucose - and having been taught to do sub-cutaneous injections I have no problems with injections. FFS I've used a lancet on my dick in the course of online fucking to get enough blood to use as lube to wank with. I just want a hardon reliable enough to fuck with! Much as I like getting an assfull I do like to return the favour.

Sorry, but no... Piss might be too acidic for HIV, but all manner of other nasties can survive in it. Piss is sterile to the pisser, but not necessarily to anyone else. My STI clinic has stopped using urethral swabs because they can get exactly the same information from a piss sample. Strange thing here: I can piss over or in guys, but I'm damned if I can piss at the clinic. Which is why I keep a supply of piss-pots at home and fill one before leaving for the clinic, noting the time I pissed. It's testable for about six hours. Another clinic hint: if you have diabetes, do a BG test before eat or drink anything on clinic days. Gives them a better idea of where your glucose levels are at - it takes about ninety minutes for me to get to my clinic. No way am I risking a hypo so they can keep their records straight.

Bloody difficult when the themes you want to address get spread over two pages... First off, to mike_theriot, we all knew how the world had to change in our early twenties. Experience over the years has tuaght us that it just don't work that way. There's no conspiracy against youth, just an awareness that you may be making the biggest mistake of your life and an effort to steer you aware from making that mistake. Speaking for myself, when I was 23, anyone over 35 was an ignorant asshole who didn't know what was happening in the world and was only good for sex. I like to think I've learned a bit since then. The face of HIV has changed "since my day" - I remember the first cautious news items in the Advocate about clusters of rare diseases (PCP and KS) in gay men. It's now pretty much become just another STI, albeit one that lasts for life and kills you if you don't take the meds. And not in a gentle, slip away in your sleep way. Agonising and humiliating are two words that spring to mind. Virtually all of us here have made mistakes: what you interpret as bashing youth is actually us trying to stop you from making the same mistakes. One bit of advice: you get your point across much more memorably by being polite about it rather than deciding if someone "deserves" your good manners. Smudger: I've been poz since 1980. I've fucked up a lot of times and just don't want anyone else to re-live my life when I know there are other choices. Thanks for your comments :-) Although I can assure you that my longrunning story Pozdaddy started out as fiction way before it descended into thinly disguised gossip: The gifting/chasing scene has never been for me. I enjoy Buffy the Vampire Slayer: does that mean I really want to be homo-Spike? ;-) Jizz and Firefighter - absolute agreement! mike_theriot - none of this has been personal: as others have said, we've been trying to pass our experience on to you so you don't fuck up the way we may (I'm not speaking for everyone!) have. Stick around and learn. At the risk of blowing my own trumpet, may I suggest you read http://www.beyondpositive.org/2013/10/21/steve-mentoring-died-aids-epidemic-now/ ? A short think piece on younger guys learning from older guys on the scene and the way it doesn't seem to happen any more...

First off complain about to the doctor to the relevant authorities. PrEP is a licensed treatment recommended for guys in your situation. If you were to get HIV while on PrEP it would be a next door to a miracle. Truvada was originally designed as a treatment drug, therefore dealing with an entire body's worth of HIV, not just with an asshole full's worth. Even if you were unlucky enough to get HIV while on PrEP, it's not your taking truvada that would weaken its effect: it's the fact that your pozdaddy's virus had a mutation making it resistant to truvada. You do not become resistant to a drug: the virus becomes resistant to the drug. Try and see another doctor, prefereably one who can see the difference between a human being and a virus. As for your original doctor, knee him in the balls, kiss him on the lips and say "bearbandit sends his love". <joke: I am not soliciting unwanted violence! >