Inception

I kept my thoughts to myself about you last post, as I realize that it was your experience, but I can see how it might upset many - most who aren't gonna be polite when commenting anonymously online. I thought that they were memories perhaps better not shared publicly. They pehaps may get you attention that you don't want. What if your blog went viral? Most people out there have a bludgeon first ask questions later attitude. Most people do not have good memories of early sexual experiences with older individuals. For example just today in Winnipeg Graham James was given 2 years on the new charges he faced. The story is well known in Canada since he sexually assaulted some pretty famous hockey players when he coached them in the juniors, like Theo Fleury who wrote a book about how the abuse wrecked his later life. http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/story/2012/03/19/graham-james-sentence.html Of course these were people in a totally different situation - not actively seeking sex at a young age with older individuals. But most people aren't going to understand the difference, and will just see what you wrote as promoting abusive behaviour. I know what my thinking was like at the same age, and while I understand it, now I wouldn't condone my own behaviour in anyone that age.

Yesterday, Sunday afternoon at baths, as soon as I walked in a bearish guy in his 40's who I've never met before was giving me the eye. As soon as I was undressed he gestured for me to come into his room. He started petting me and asked if I liked getting fucked. He got very excited when I answered yes and quickly had me on all fours. He handed me poppers and asked, "Do you know waht these are?" I just nodded and started huffing. I didn't pay attention to what he did behind me hoping he would go in bare. He sighed loudly when he entered me which gave me hope, but he was wrapped. When he came he stayed inside for a bit and I squeezed him a little while. He liked that, and I almost squeezed off the condom. He had to pull it out of my ass, which made a popping sound since the end of the condom was like a balloon full of a huge load. I should have left and not pressed my luck that I would get more. The place was full of bottoms - mostly older. Ran into a Pakistani fellow I dated a bit over 10 years ago, he's probably 50 now, and he has a massive cock. Unfortunately he dumped me then cause he felt I was too immature and I don't think his opinion has changed (also he hates poppers). I had to listen to the bitch in the room next to me get plowed by his huge rod. I should have been happy just taking the bear fuck and left.

http://www.xtube.com/community/profile.php?user=tovomas This german guy and his partner have some hot public bb vids.

Lately I have been trying to gt more "out of my shell" and be more open to different guys and less shy - paying attention to the glances guys give me. I've realized that there are guys who have been wanting me, but because of my own insecurities my attitude has come across as being "stuck up." Word has started to get arround. Tuesday night at my local tubs was really dead, but there was an older, chubby poz guy who usually looks at me and then glances away figuring he has no chance. Tuesday night I just looked right at him and gave him a big smile. He was getting ready to go and was half dressed over by the group of elderly guys watching sports on the bigscreen TV. I don't know if they said somehing to him or what, but I took a walk to the other end of the club and suddenly he was there undressed. I grabbed his cock wanked him once and literally his whole body shuddered. He dropped to his knees and sucked me. I reached down and squeezed his big nips and in seconds he was shooting his load all over my feet. He literally went from soft to shooting in a matter of 2 -3 minutes just because I finally showed him some attention after I don't know how many years of seeing him about. I'm not some big stud, I'm just somebody that they've all seen grow up over the last 15 years from being a chubby twink to whatever I am now.

Depends where you are, most of the country is small, rural communities. But yes, like the US, more poz guys in major cities. But Metro Vancouver is the third largest metropolitan area in Canada, yet still only has a population of about 2.2 million. The whole country has a population of about 34 million. According to latest statistics at the end of 2008 there were an estimated 65,000 people in Canada living with HIV. Compare this to California which has an area close to that of just the province of British Columbia yet has a population of about 37.3 million and an estimated 67,505 cases of HIV (data through April 30, 2009). (from http://www.cdph.ca.gov/programs/aids/Documents/EvolutionofAIDS.pdf) Population wise these are similar statistics, just the populaton here is spread out more. In Vancouver about 25% of gay men are estimated to be HIV postive. 40% of HIV cases are in gay men, though another 20% are in men who have not reported their risk factors, so assume 60% from gay sex.

Yeah he needs a relationship. But definitely the tubs here have changed, even a few years ago bareback was not done openly or acknowleged. So guys who go infrequntly, like my friend, are often shocked. It has had a bad effect on business. There's 4 tubs that 10 years ago would have been all busy 7 nights a week. Now midweek is often dead. I went to my regular place Tuesday night and there was only about 12 guys, half of those the over 65 crowd who just come to watch the game on the bigscreen TV. I ended up just hanging with them.

Especially when the centre of your universe for the next hour is my hole! These seem more like the rules chickenhawk tops try to use. Like rule 7 about it hurting when it goes in. No one fucking men will find the guy whining about it hurting, that's just kids new to taking it. I hate chickenhawks - bottoms or tops - who don't treat boys right and give them bad experiences that turn them off. Taking your time to open the boy up will pay off. Older bottoms who shows boys a good time are doing all the other older bottoms a favour a well since these guys will start looking exclusively for older. I had a hot young guy with a massive prick a couple months ago who contacted me after and said that for the first time he knew how good an ass could make him feel - he'd never had a guy clench and milk him, just coked out party boys with loose open pussies. After them he usually only looked for oral because incredibly he thought asses couldn't give him the tighness and friction he desired! Now I see his online ads have changed and he's no longer looking for muscle boys his age but is seeking beefy older bottoms with big asses. He's stopped cruising the dance clubs and twink bar, and told me he discovered that the dark rooms at the tubs are a good place to find easy hole. It was kind of cute.

I was glad we never kissed knowing what he did with his mouth. That line almost made me shoot before I finished the story. It`s so hot that he expects the bottom to do something that he thinks is disgusting.

A guy I used to see had this problem. He would come almost as soon as he got inside me. BUT his second load would take longer. So fuck somebody you don't mind spending a bit of time hanging out with. Stick in and unload, then chill out, relax, make out whatever. I would spend about an hour rimming my man while he watched TV and was ready to fuck again. The second and third goes would make my ass cry he lasted so long. It was great!

I regret being HIV positive. I am healthy and my meds work with few side effects. I am in Canada so have socialized medical care so expense of meds is not an issue - though the government does make sure that the price is listed on the bottle every time I refill my perscription so I know how expensive the drugs are. I regret it because it scares away a lot of otherwise cool guys who might be interested in me. A lot of the poz players into the bb scene seem to not really give a shit about other people, and I find that disturbing. But is it sexually freeing? I don't know, I got it because I was doing crazy sex all over. Then I was worried about spreading HIV so I slowed right down. Once I was undetectable I got back out there, and now realizing how many other guys are poz I do act more freey than friends who are neg. Though it might just be that I am sluttier than they are. Here's an example: last weekend a buddy (a friend not a fuckbud) texted me that he was hanging out at some tubs in the city and wondered what I was up to and if I wanted to meet up for dinner or something. I got back and said I was horny so I would just meet him there and we could decide what we wanted to do. He is a gorgeous, hung black man in a city with a small black population. Everyone wants him. But he is neg, and in his early 20's dealt with an older partner who suffered and died during the height of the AIDS crisis. He does not go on online hook-up sites, and when we go out quizzes me about the reputations of everyone else (it's a fucking small city). When he goes to the tubs he is extra careful. He's a top and watches to see who is going around being bred and avoids those bottoms. This past weekend I got laid a couple times while he spent his time being careful. At one point two guys were fucking bare in the jacuzzi and he was shocked that they were doing it out in the open. I had to explain to him that in the last couple years there has been a big change at the baths in the city, and that since so many guys are poz bb is pretty normal now at the baths, and that probably most neg guys like himself avoid them. He asked me, "How do you even know who's barebacking and who isn't?" He said that he would never have expected the guy topping in the jacuzzi to be a barebacker since he looked normal. I just said, "Well I look normal, and you know I am positive, so you can't tell if a guy is pos by how he looks." I didn't explicity tell him that I was at that moment loaded with seed. Neither dd I go into detail explaining how the young guy getting fucked in the jacuzzi advertises on BBRT and Squirt as a poz submissive cumdump with his face pics unlocked, so that pretty much everyone knows that he will bend over anywhere for anyone no questions asked. Just not a concept that I think he ready for.

Tubs here are busy Sunay afternoons. 1 has cheap locker specials, another has a lot of married guys who probably tell their wives they're gong to the bar to watch a game.

Tonight went to baths I haven't been to for a while and ran into two guys I have done before. 1st: Korean top who I have played with many times over last 15 years. When we were younger we played safe, but now he fucks me raw no questions asked. I find him a bit flaky so don't always accept his advances - but he's hung, loves my hole, and never gives up. He likes to go ass to mouth. Tonight he said to me, "When you suck me so good it makes me want to return the favour and do you really good in your ass." I don't know why he thought he had to use a line like that to get in my ass, though it was kind of sexy. He wanted me to eat his load but then changed his mind and shot it up my hole. 2nd: Mexican guy who likes me to stay poppered up. He was a bit drunk and after fucking me for a while we took a bit of a break and he started teling me about problems with his girlfriend. He started crying and I didn't know what to do except just listen and hold him. I felt awkward especially since I didn't know before that he is bi. After a while he calmed down and thanked me for taking care of him. Then he started grabbing my ass and got hard again and I was a bit leary of the situatiion, but he said "You are a very good boy so just make me feel better." So he fucked me more, shoving poppers under my nose the whole time, until he shot. He uses condoms, which in his situation is good. Both guys wanted my number since it had been a while since I had seen either, and they were hoping to maybe meet more regularly outside of baths, but both are too bonkers so I made lame excuses to turn them down.

Depends on the scene/place. At tubs or anon with a top you don't know, do you really give a shit about pleasing that guy or about pleasing yourself? What's the likelyhood he's someone you'll hookup with again? In that kind of scene just get what you want out of it - he's nothing but a walking dildo. OR if he sees that you ar hard and wanking he might want to bend over and take it for a while as well. With a regular fuckbud, or someonewho has the potential to become one, communicate with him to learn what will make him happy.

As bottom I don't feel much difference from the fuck, though you get wetter from the come. BUT it makes a much bigger difference physically as a top. There's way more sensation for your cock. When I top I usually wrap up if I don't know the other guy's status, but am always hoping he's poz and I can go bare. I don't have a big fetish for taking loads in my ass, and prefer to take it orally; but knowing how awesome my hole can make a top's cock feel is what makes me want to take it bare for those that want it that way. It is also a big turnon to be in a situation where I know that I've made the top so horny that he just has to gt into my ass NOW and isn't concerned about taking the time for precautions.

Same, this is when they start to burn me, when losing strength. My spring hay fever is kicking in (yes there is pollen in the air here in March) and I've got to stay away from poppers for a while because my sinuses are already irritated at this time of year and poppers make them way worse. Ever since I started ARV's I find my spring allergies are worse and anti-histimines don't work as well, even though I am told that they shouldn't interact. There is a good side to popper burns... for people who know what they are you can readily see which guys are big popper pigs.

I work in construction, and we have to make sure that materials made from different plastics don't touch or are insulated from each other so that they don't break each other down. I thought this was common knowledge. I wrap my dildos in old t-shirts so they don't touch each other. Also I have one that I like (Johnny Hazzard's cock) but the plastic it is made from is uncomfortable. I am not alergic to latex but I'm thinking it may be vinyl. Anyways I put a condom on it. Maybe you don't like condoms for sex, but they're good for dildos!

From xtra: http://www.xtra.ca/public/National/UPDATE_Supreme_Court_questions_defence_in_landmark_HIV_case-11493.aspx UPDATE: Supreme Court questions defence in landmark HIV case BREAKING NEWS / Top judges grill government lawyers as court reviews rules in criminalization cases Marcus McCann / National / Wednesday, February 08, 2012 Two government lawyers got an earful from the Supreme Court of Canada Feb 8, as arguments got underway in Ottawa in two cases involving HIV nondisclosure. Judges pressed lawyers representing the Quebec and Manitoba attorney generals' offices over their apparent disregard for scientific evidence with respect to the evolution of HIV treatment and viral load over the last 15 years. Chief Justice Beverley McLachlin also suggested that the test for criminal responsibility for nondisclosure, as it's formulated, may be too vague to be useful. “How is that person supposed to know if they are committing a criminal act? If the answer is, 'They can't know for sure,' then surely the crime isn't really a crime. It would violate one of the fundamental principles of criminal law,” McLachlin said. “If you set the terms as broad as ‘You need to know what you're getting yourself into,’ she added, “you'd be vitiating consent in thousands of consents every day . . . or night.” The court is reviewing the rules set out in its 1998 Cuerrier decision, which required that HIV-positive people disclose their status to sexual partners if there is a “significant risk of serious bodily harm.” The attorneys general argued that all risk of infection is a “significant risk” and that contracting HIV/AIDS is a “serious bodily harm.” Elizabeth Thomson, a lawyer representing the attorney general of Manitoba, was interrupted by Justice Rosalie Abella within the first five minutes of the hearing. Increasingly pointed questions effectively derailed Thomson's oral argument. Judges openly worried that the attorney general's position, if adopted, would result in an absolute liability offence. Justice Abella called Manitoba's position one with “no nuance, no gradations.” Justice Michael Moldaver said the justices were looking for a clear, intelligible test where HIV-positive people would not have to disclose in every circumstance. Moldaver twice referred to a trial decision in which a judge ruled that a poz person would not have a duty to disclose if he had both a low viral load and used a condom. Moldaver referred to risk of transmission in those circumstances as “nonexistent or virtually nonexistent.” Chief Justice McLachlin suggested that in cases where the risk does not materialize — where no partner becomes HIV-positive — there may not be any crime at all. The judges' comments are in no way binding. Often, the written judgments vary significantly from what is said in court. The cases, R v Mabior and R v DC, both involve HIV-nondisclosure where their partners did not become HIV-positive. Condom use and level of infectiousness — as measured by the number of copies of the virus in the bloodstream, referred to as viral load — were issues in both trials. The identity of the victims in both cases are covered by a publication ban. Amanda Sansregret, a legal aid lawyer from Manitoba who represents one of the two accused, gave a lively defence of her client. She argued that either condom use or low viral load ought to suffice as a defence. It's a sentiment that echoes the submissions from AIDS service organizations made in advance of the hearing. HIV-positive partners who use condoms or have low viral loads simply don't pose a high risk to their partners, she said. “People have been lying in order to secure sexual consent from time immemorial,” Sansregret said. “If you really want to protect yourself, you should use a condom . . . it strikes me as the safest approach. “If you're looking for a complete absence of risk, with all respect, abstinence is your answer.” The court asked equally pointed questions of Sansregret and another defence lawyer, Christian Desrosiers. Abella asked whether access to post-exposure prophylactics changes the math – noting that a partner of someone who doesn't know his or her partner is HIV-positive will not know when it might be appropriate to use that kind of medication, thereby increasing his or her risk. She also asked about partners who may be especially vulnerable to HIV transmission, for instance if they have coinfections. She said a poz partner may know the risk he poses in regular circumstances but may not be aware of the extra vulnerability of his partner. There was a single 10-minute presentation from a coalition of AIDS groups. Lead counsel Jonathan Shime described the current test as “an appropriate safeguard.” “We don't need to criminalize everyone in order to have a predictable” law of HIV, he says. “Use of a condom means there is . . . intention. There is no recklessness.” The BC Civil Liberties Association and the Criminal Lawyers' Association also presented briefs. Aside from closing comments, Quebec Public Health had the last word. Lucie Joncas told the court that public health is not helped by the overuse of the criminal law in this area. She gave two reasons: firstly, that the bulk of new infections come from people who do not yet know that they are HIV-positive, and secondly, that consistent use of condoms — rather than relying on partners' representations of their HIV status — is the best way to protect the health of Canadians.

Last night at tubs. Hot guy in his late 40's, about 5'9", built, shaved head: cruised me and followed me to my room. I got down on his cock, it was about 8 inches and WIDE. He hit poppers as I deep throated him and then he stuck his ass in my face He hadn't showered and it was a bit nasty. Used some Diet Coke to wash his hole up a bit. He got really turned on and want into my ass. I should have used more lube. As we switched positions around I would suck him when he pulled out of my as and he loved it. He was like, "Ya just suck that cock right outta your ass." When he was ready to blow he asked whee I wanted it and I said it was up to him. H rammed back into my ass and pumped til he blew. THEN in the showers cleaning up the guy comes up to me and asks, "Hey, I should have asked before but, you're clean right?" I was incredulous, and said "No" and he was all like "But why did you lt me do all that stuff? I assumed you were safe if you did that stuff." I was like, "Here?!? Here you should assume everyone has it because look around, they all do!" (He told me he was bi while fucking me so maybe bi guys have no clue what guys on the old meds look like?) He was freaking and I just told him I have no viral load - which didn't seem to register on his face as info he understood - and then that that's not how you catch it - I said, "You catch it by letting random guys come in your ass." Then I left the showers and decided to get dresses and got the hell out of there in case he started a bigger scene. The sex was hot, the guy was stupid. Drove half an hour across town to a different tubs (in a V8 with gas at $1.40 a litre!). A guy came in about an hour after I got there who could have been the first guy's twin and I was freaking a bit, until I realized it was a different guy who I had played with before. We ended up making out in the hot tub. He has a longer cock, though not as fat. He kept rubbing it on my hole under the water trying to get in, but with no lube under water wouldn't go in. We played in the hot tub way too long and I was wiped out. Fell aleep in my room for about an hour, woke up wirth a start when a different guy started rubbing my legs. I said I wasn't up for anything and checked to see if if guy from hot tub was still around but he was gone. Guy who had woken me upm was jerking in video room and had a nice big cock but he was a bit old and it was late and I had to head home. I'm 10 minutes late for work now writting this.

If you wanted to fuck me and you were vers I would not turn you down. On hook-up sites I usually prefer to check out profiles of tops and vers-tops only. I usually am listed as vers-bottom, mainly because I love eating ass though I know I would probably disappoint a total bottom. At tubs though I get hit on by bottoms all the time cause I'm a big masc guy and I will not deny that I occassionally top them. My preference is for young, masculine top guys; but an effeminite bottom moaning as you eat them out is very, very, very nice. I do feel a lot of performance anxiety topping though. If I took viagra I probably would have no problem. Probably instead of topping myself I prefer doing three-ways where I eat out another bottom, especially a smaller guy, and get him wet and open for a top; I also like to suck/ deep-throat the top and let him take turns between the bottom's ass and my mouth/throat. My last bf had a thing for fucking older bears, while I prefer twinks, so this sort of situation never worked out for us as we could never agree on the right bottom to team up on as neither of us were into guys too similar to ourselves.

There doesn't have to be a conflict. With the right guy, when you are in the bedroom torturing his nipples etc, that is gonna make him fall in love with you and want to do all the cuddley stuff as well later after you've come. I dated a guy who was over ten years younger than me and we had great cuddly times, and yet when we were out on nice romantic dates he would do things like slip his hand down my pants and stick a few fingers in my ass when I wasn't expecting it or give my nips a nasty squeeze just to let me know that despite all the mushy stuff he saw me as his sex toy. It was sort of dominate of him, but also just his way to show affection. If work and distance obstacles could have been overcome we probably would still be together. I wasn't his sugar daddy either, as he was an RN with a specialty in cardiology, and was already making almost double my salary.

wow lots of good stuff on that site

I remember always putting a finger in my bumhole and smelling it when I was very young. I liked the smell. I started buying gay porn mags with my paper route money very young - pre-teen. Mostly In Touch magazine I remember. I just wanted to see pictures of erect penises. The first time I saw a picture in a magazine of a guy with his legs spread showing his asshole I thought it was amazing. Reading the stories in the porn mags made me think getting fucked would be very easy. I started playing with things in my butt, like my dad's screwdrivers from the garage, and got scared when it hurt and I bled a bit. But kept playing with myself through my teens. This was in the 80's into 90's and early on (like 11-14) I always worried that I might catch AIDS from buying magazines or playing with myself.

At tubs last night. Two notables. 1) Early 20's East Indian kid, tall and nice build, grabbed my ass and asked if I was a bottom. I sucked him and we kissed and I licked his pits and chest. He hadn't showered and his smell I can only describe as teenage boy. He lasted about a minute and half before coming in my ass. He apologised for that and I told him not to worry as he would get better with practise. He told me it was the most amazing sex he had ever had, and the way he said it I was almost afraid I maybe took his cherry. I told him he needed to have more sex - but I said it nicer than that sounds when I type it. 2)Big beefy smooth First Nations guy in his 40's. He was stroking in steam room and spread his legs for me to suck him. Long fat dick and he held my head so it stayed in my throat until I couldn't breathe. While on my knees an old guy who had been chasing me came up behind and tweaked my nipples, and then started lubing my ass. The guy I was sucking got very verbal: "Just stay on my dick boy and open your ass up. Just let your hole get fucked open boy." But the older guy just fingered me and rubbed his dick on my ass a bit but didn't go in. It got too hot and we had to cool off. The big guy came to my room after a bit. He wanted his ass eaten and just got on my bed on all fours. He had a humungous fat ass and a big hole that I slurped and tongued out for a very long time. I was opening him up with thumbs so I could get my tongue deep inside and he loved that. Maybe he's vers? He had me keep going back to sucking his cock from behind which was an akward position, until he jumped off the bed and I got up and laid on my back with my legs spread back and presented my hole. He fucked me for a bit but wanted back in my mouth to cum. I got down on my kness in front of him and he held himself in my throat while he unloaded. I didn't get to taste any of it. The older guy, probably mid 60's, who had fingered me in steam room kept staring at me, but never made much of move. I know there's a tricky equilibrium when you are chasing a young stud - you don't want to be too aggressive and have them freak out on you but at the same time we need you to be aggressive or we're gonna go with someone younger. Also, if you are in a city like mine with multiple baths, remind yourself, "If this guy wasn't at all open to doing daddies would he even be at the bath with the reputation for being mostly older guys?" Anyways I was quite horny cause niether previous guy had fucked me much and I knew this guy was interested so I hit some poppers to get myself over my mental barrier about doing someone older and not as good-looking as I prefer, but then when I went to look for him he was gone!

It's just like taking big stuff up your butt, it takes practise. As a teenager with my first dildos I spent almost as much time fucking my throat as my ass to break down my gag reflex.

Bravo! I've got nothing against people into the whole dom top/sub bottom thing, but it just ain't me. If I know that's what a guy is into I probably wouldn't try hooking up with him as we wouldn't be a good match. It is the same as how I am not gonna chase a guy who is into cd's or tranny's. We would not jive. I'm not trying to be pushy or bossy. I just want to have a good time and show a man a good time that they appreciate. I very rarely chase anyone. I do fine with just being me, and yes I am as loudmouthed and cantankerous in person as I am on online. At the tubs, when I run into friends, I am definitely one of those loud guys who has loud annoying conversations with a lot of joking arround. There are plenty of guys who avoid me and yet somehow I always get laid. Plenty of guys like that a masculine guy will bend over for them.