spermy71

I’ve done this before… I’m much more of a bottom, but it’s hot to be part of making this happen. I was one of the unseen guys in the video “Bones for a Cumpuppy”. I did it a couple of other times in San Francisco. I’d be up for doing it again as a top, though again, even more excited about being the bottom for it…

Hey Scorpio, I'd say there's good news and there's bad news. The good news is that you are unlikely to get something on a single incident. I've been to bathhouses multiple times, and I don't think I've ever gotten anything there, even though I've been an unprotected bottom. As a top you are at a significantly lower risk. The last study I heard suggested 1/5th the chance for the top compared to the bottom. That said, as bad news, in the past year, I've had to be treated for HPV in the throat and ass, and I've had gonorrhoea and syphilis. Some of those are harder to diagnose in women, and some have worse effects on women's bodies. Also, the fact that the guy could take you so fast and was so lubed means that likely the lube was someone else's cum. While that's hot (to me and to a lot of guys), it's a bigger risk. Personally, playing raw with other guys is not something that is optional for me. If I have periods of time when I can't for whatever reason, I feel like life is not worth living. For others it can be more optional. You're going to want to choose how you proceed based on how important this is for you. Can you realistically keep yourself away from this in the future? Or is this a part of you that can't be denied? The only way to keep your wife from any risk is to avoid having sex with her for a few weeks to a month, then get tested. If you're determined to keep this from her, I'm not sure what you tell her to explain your abstinence. If this part of you can't be denied, you have to have some communication with her. It's a hard conversation, but "honey, I feel like I need to play outside our marriage to feel fulfilled" is a lot easier than "honey, I just gave you the clap", and nothing compared to "honey, I just gave you HIV". It's just good planning to try to find someone to play with who plays a bit less. It seems worth the time to find a more regular fuck buddy compared to playing at the bathhouse with a cumdump bottom like me (or your friend) who's already loaded. If you need it to be anonymous, you might keep it to blowjobs? Maybe your bathhouse has one of those ramps where the tops go up and the bottoms go down so that the cocksuckers don't have to kneel? That way you could make sure one of us sneaky bottoms doesn't back up on you... As far as asking if he is neg or poz, it's largely irrelevant. If the guy who sat right down on your cock is negative, it's most likely because he's on PrEP. If he thinks he's negative and he's not on PrEP, he's likely newly poz and highly contagious. Likely a guy who is poz and has known for a long time is managing it with meds and is not contagious at all. But there are people who are poz and have a high viral load. And then there are guys who would lie to you in either direction, and a ton who don't know. And there is the status of the lube in his ass that is likely someone else's cum, and there's no way to ask about that. You're really concerned about the viral load, and this is just not something that you can assess with a one-word question. In your situation, getting on PrEP yourself makes sense, as this is the one that your wife is least likely to forgive you for giving her. If you can't PrEP up and have to be absolutely safe, you are mostly OK with just getting blowjobs, and maybe sucking a bit not to completion. For me sex doesn't count unless his cum goes inside me, so this isn't an option, and I have to be open about who I am and what I need. I wish you all the best in figuring out how to navigate this.

Why not? A friend of mine seroconverted, and he knew because he had persistent colds, sinus infections, and flu symptoms that wouldn't go away for 2 months and made his life a bummer. This is because the virus was taking out his immune system. He was 50. He had tested negative within the year. I don't want to be judgy about fetishes around the virus, but in practicality it can have severe, fatal consequences, along an excruciating, debilitating journey, and have effects that can be felt rather early. A 72 year old could still have 50 years to live (unlikely, but possible), and as he ages, his immune system likely weakens naturally. It's not the age to open his system up to anything that could weaken this farther--what was an annoyance and a real bummer to my friend could have meant death for him 25 years later. Medically it makes total sense to me. He may not have sex frequently, but when he does he wants to be a cumdump....so why not enjoy it without fearing he'll die earlier, or be sicker or more in the hospital? Why not at any age? Why are we so suspicious of PrEP?

How? If you have a poz fetish that's great. I respect that in you. Not everyone wants it. Does that make them evil? I don't get it.

PrEP I don't know anyone personally with long-term consequences from it. But my gay friends boil down to two camps, one is on a light dose of antivirals called PrEP, they're neg. The other group is poz and is now on a harsher dose of the same antivirals. Either that or they're sick. Risking HIV because you don't want to take harsh medicine is like not doing your taxes because you're afraid of an audit. Barebacking is awesome. You should totally do it. Get on PrEP and do it.

I do feel for you...and have had experienced a very similar relationship. To summarize, I am 100% glad I left. I stayed for almost 8 years with a guy who had lots of sex with me when we first met, then withdrew it more and more the more stable our relationship got. He outright cut me off for more than a year. We were living together at that point, and I had such a hard time because I owned the house but he had made it his, and I knew ending the relationship would mean evicting him. I was completely dedicated to making sure he was OK. We were very sweet together. From the outside we looked like a great couple. I would always tuck him in at night and we would snuggle a bit. But if I would start nuzzling his neck or going below his waist he would shrug away and say how “that tickled” and I’d stop and wait until he was asleep and then get up and go have sex with the internet. The gentle manner of his refusal was helpful the first hundred or so times, but definitely once I’d been turned away 1000+ times, it just felt like rejection. It might have been worse because he requested monogamy, and I had committed to it. I would castigate myself daily for not demanding at least an open relationship, for not speaking up for my needs—even for never cheating. But I knew at some level he was doing all he could and my anger at my situation was matched by concern for him. I considered everything mentioned here about what might be wrong. My best guess was that he was abused as a child and was repressing the memory. He lured me into the relationship with sex, and was always very “sexy” in a social situation...but the actual sex act caused anxiety rather than soothing like it did for me. I also think he wanted sex to be kinkier than my normal tendencies. He could never ask for this, but I intuited that he wanted to be choked and spanked. I’d have been willing if not excited to try this, but I couldn’t play-choke someone with poor lines of communication where I was feeling authentic anger, and he couldn’t ask for what he wanted. When we talked he blamed it on frequency of doing the dishes and laundry—he felt like he was stressed at work and had to take care of the house too, and that got him out of the mood. I’m not the biggest neat freak, but also not the biggest slob. I even did all the housework for a month, but he still didn’t get in the mood. But seriously...laundry? He blamed me constantly for what was wrong. He didn’t want to be responsible for my sexuality which to him seemed like a “force of nature”. He didn’t want to get fucked anymore because my dick had apparently grown between when we started dating and when we were established. Yup, the only criticisms I got about the sex itself were that I wanted it too often, our encounters lasted too long, and my dick was too big. I submit those three to a jury of my peers. But I felt responsible for this man I loved. I gave him so much support I had a hard time believing he could make it on his own. Finally, I sold the house for a loss at the housing crash, moved to an apartment with him, got him situated, and then left after a fight we had where I told him I was not expecting myself to be monogamous during a trip to the Gay Games. He stonewalled me, and this was just after he had jokingly threatened to kill me while he was drunk. It was a joking threat, but I fled for my life. I lost many friends because I got so sick of bitching about my lack of sex. It dominated my world. It was so awful I had sunk into a depression where I feared for my life—that some time I would just accidentally turn left into the bay or press the gas instead of the brake with a truck stopped in front of me...because, fuck it, what did I have to live for? I have not looked back. All the pondering of what might be wrong—it’s not your responsibility. Sexual expression is a key tenet of a couple and it’s a violation of the terms of your relationship to go from “lots” to “none”. If you are concerned that he might not be able to make it on his own, it would be more honest to just send him money every month. That’s kind of what you’re doing now, it’s just dressed up as homemaking. So my vote: get out. I don’t know how gay alimony works..you might have to give him half your savings. It’s worth it. This isn’t going away, and your recent apathy is a very bad sign. They say the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s apathy. Withholding sex has caused him to lose you. It’s sad, but it just gets harder if it’s prolonged. My heart goes out to you. And him too honestly—he’s got to be in a bad place to behave like this. It’s his job to get the help he needs. Go get your life back.

I love going to the baths, and I'm neg. I respect the chasing fantasy, but it's not what I want. I just want to enjoy sperm and not think of HIV at all. I'm on PrEP, so that's exactly what I get: Lots of sex, no condoms, no worries.

What I really want is a PrEP-positive power bottom cumwhore gay doctor. I'm moving to the area, and I'm spoiled by the doctor I'm leaving behind--one who suggested PrEP for me (almost pushed it on me), and has been a well-known AIDS doctor, but also a very good General Practitioner. It would just be nice to not have to deal with PrEP- and slut- and homo-phobia as I look for someone to transfer to. Does anybody in Portland have a doctor they love, or better yet, is someone on this site a GP who might want a new patient?

Another plug for PrEP. I find that after taking indiscriminate loads and testing neg, reading other people's experience, and reading the Kaiser study showing _no_ seroconversions for people on PrEP, I am able to take loads without thinking or worrying about it. To me it's about taking a medicine now I can always quit, or seroconverting and being forced for my continued health to take the same medicine plus others to maintain my health. I just think that PrEP changes the game on the "eventually I'll get it" idea, and also takes the worry out of it. It's great that you are not afraid of the pos status, but you can be on PrEP and still not be afraid. If you want to be pos, that's a choice you can make now or later. PrEP gives you the chance to enjoy cum without needing to make that decision now. Bareback doesn't have to mean pos anymore...

Just now at Hawks in Portland. Hot guy had me blowing him, then started fucking another guy....then I fucked the guy while he fucked me...the guy I was fucking bailed, but then I could bend over better for him to fuck me. I begged a little for his load, and he yelled out as he filled me with his cum. His partner was there too, and heard the commotion and got me into his room to fuck me after that...

I love Portland! Just took two loads in my hotel. First guy was repeat of the same guy who bred me earlier this week. This time we were setting up a 3 way, but the other guy didn't show. He fucked me really nice and then we laid down and cuddled and chatted until the next guy arrived. First guy left, made out with the next guy, sucked him hard, got on the bed and got bred with a huge load after his cock pounded me into next week. He was nice too. Talked about the city, music, racism, life in general while his cock steeped in my cummy hole. Such sweet men in this city. Now I'm all alone with two loads swimming around in me. Anyone want to add theirs?

A couple invited me over to get bred with two loads. I spent a long time getting fucked and rimmed by one of them while sucking number 2. Then I got up on the bed and rode #2 for a while. #1 tried to get in too, to double-fuck me, but I'm not advanced enough for that yet. Then #2 flipped me over and bred me missionary style. Soooo hot. #1 was having trouble cumming, but when I licked his balls while he jacked, he got there pretty soon...Took his load on my face and in my mouth. Perfect evening: nice guys + hot cocks + cum in both ends = happy cumdump

Just got back from a semi-anonymous breeding...hot young cub from BBRT bred me in the bathroom in the basement of the church where he worked. He was sweet, he snuck me in through the basement entrance, I sucked him and he jacked until hard, then he fucked me until he blew his load in me, barely a word spoken to keep the noise down. I can still feel his load trying to slip out, but I'm holding it in as long as I can. This is my first load since going on PrEP months ago. I don't know what took me so long....I'm already planning to get more loads tonight. Maybe get my ass into a sling at Hawks and see how many loads Portland guys are willing to fuck into me tonight.

Hey guys, Just wondering where you all get your info. I've been searching the web for this, and can only find the IPREX study results. PrEP has been out for a while, and I'd love to know where to get the latest about how it's playing out in the real world.