ErosWired

Kentucky. A society less liberal and more backward in many ways than even Louisiana. I was raised, however, in the Appalachian foothills of East Tennessee, which was culturally essentially interchangeable - that is, a sucky place to grow up with an odd feeling of being keenly interested in other guy’s penises.

Okay, let’s science this shit. The human rectum, as the last part of the colon preceding the anal canal, extends 15-17cm (5.9-6.7in) inward and upward from the anal opening before it terminates at a sharp bend known as the rectosigmoid junction. At this junction lies what is considered the first valve of the rectum. The rectum has usually three valves (the “valves of Houston”) which do not form compartments in the rectum, but move laterally to support fecal matter entering the rectum; if they didn’t, there would be an urge to defecate as soon as anything entered the rectum and we would have much less bowel control. These are not valves in the sense that they can completely close or open the passage by contraction. Most people have three rectal valves, though rarely there can be two or four. The presence of an actual “sphincter” at the location of the first valve is a matter if debate among medical researchers. No distinct physical apparatus is present to cause the complete closure of the rectum from the sigmoid colon. Studies have, however, demonstrated that the location is an area of high manometric pressure, raising the possibility that the rectosigmoid junction functions as a kind of “open sphincter” partially regulating the passage of matter between the two zones. So, it is likely that a cock attempting to penetrate beyond the rectum into the relatively open space of the sigmoid colon above will encounter resistance in the form of a zone constricted both by its general dimensions and by an autonomous reaction to regulate the passage of matter. Additional resistance will result from the fact that the sigmoid colon takes roughly a 90° turn at the junction, and further penetration along the canal requires rearrangement of the internal anatomy - failure to make the adjustment could result in a disastrous breach if the colon wall. Note again that the maximum average length of the rectum to the junction is only 6.9 inches. It does not require an 11” cock, or even an 8” cock, to penetrate beyond the rectosigmoid junction. So I have to question accounts that report only feeling the sensation when their amazingly hung 12” Top does the fucking. As to penetration beyond the junction resulting in permanent impotence... please. No physical structures related to erection are present at, or connected to, the anatomy in question that could remotely result in impotence. And if that weren’t enough, empirical evidence produced daily in the form of fucks given with long cocks demonstrates that that is grade-A hogwash. I’ve lost track of the number of 8”+ cocks that have been balls-deep in me, and I have no problem getting it up. Can we please stop acting like this is anything but someone’s fantasy?

Can’t you just go to the shore, find a fish washed up on the beach, and carry it in your trousers on the way to his house? Or go spend 15 minutes at a fish market on your way? Or buy a herring and leave it sitting open in the sun for three or four days before your date with him, and then smear it on yourself before you go? There are alternatives. (You must either have some serious dedication to serving this man, or whatever he’s blackmailing you with must be damn potent stuff. Unless you like the smell too. I’m not judging.)

I play the skin flute...

It’s all about how words are used, and I don’t think people of Color can be blamed for focusing closely on words and classifications. Words are the primary drivers of odious ideas, and their power cannot be underestimated. Take a simple two-word phrase that carries a Mount Everest of implications: “whites only”. At one time, this could be found prominently displayed on signs across America - now, the phrase is justly reviled for what it is, means, and does, and yet it is simply a pair of words, three syllables. I write professionally, and think a lot about the significance of how people use words. In recent times I have found myself frustrated by the insistence of highly vocal segments of the population insisting that words have taken on a new meaning and now have that meaning and that meaning alone because that is the word’s significance to that group. It’s a power play, but a particularly ineffective one, because language doesn’t work like that. Language is code, and people adapt the code to their purpose rather fluidly. I have no doubt whatever that you are absolutely right in your description of how wigger is perceived and used in the Black community. With respect to the OP’s question, however, I still maintain that the word is derogatory in that the association is negative, i.e., that the white person described is one who appropriates culture in an inauthentic manner. You say that the word isn’t racist because it doesn’t result in the denial of resources, but I would suggest that that relies on an overly narrow definition of racism - I consider racism to be any adverse judgment with race as a determinant. A resource can be as subtle yet crucial as the respect of those in one’s community. Please do not think that I would presume to understand the effects of racism on those affected by it better than you. I stand among those in Privilege (though as an Autistic, gay-leaning intellectual in Appalachia that concept makes me laugh bitterly) and can only take your interpretation as a true report from the field. What I can do, however, is gently challenge your own perception. In the Black community, is being considered a “wigger”, all other considerations aside, a net positive or a net negative for the person described? I discount the possibility of a neutral effect because if people truly had no feeling about it either way they wouldn’t bother to characterize the behavior and the word wigger would not exist. I would maintain that if it’s a net negative, then the word is derogatory, even if only nominally.

Your first name (or a name you'll respond to): ErosWired, Cumdump Your cell number (text only): (502)430-1967 A location (be at least as specific as a zip code): Near Horse Cave, Ky, in ZIP 42765 Times you're generally not available: Available after 10pm only with prior notice, but I will provide service at night if asked. Can also provide service at the ABS or the truck stop in Horse Cave if called. Specializing in great ass. Age: 54 Height: 6’0 Weight: 200 Ethnicity: white

Racism, I need hardly point out to a man of Color, is predicated on the classification of human beings on the basis of physical appearances, most notably among them skin color. The term in question, regardless of the nuances of its application, is applied only to individuals who fit the classification corresponding to the W - White. It is difficult to see how, by definition, there would be such thing as a Black “wigger”. Were there no distinction between races, the race-related issues that give rise to the term would not exist, therefore the term would not exist. And if it were not specifically targeted at members of the White race, it would not begin with a W - absent that association, the word would be nonsensical, or simply conjure some notion about false hairpieces. The truly nasty thing about racism is that once a division is made, the people on each side of the divide look at each other in terms of race - which forces everyone to define everything in those terms. I think it’s a bit of a reach to state that a man who feels that he occupies a lower rung in the masculine hierarchy automatically a) equates himself to a female, and b) devalues female roles. I’m a sexual service submissive for males. I submit to dominant men, and freely acknowledge their entitlement to the use of my body. I recognize this is not something universally accepted by any means, but for me it is a way of life, fully realized and quite genuine. In no way, however, do I consider myself female, or draw any equivalency between my service and women’s roles in society. I assure you that there is nothing sad about the attitude I take toward the superiority of other men; superiority is a relative measure in any case, but as I seem to be perfectly suited to fulfilling the role in an inferior position, I take pride in it as a man.

I just discovered that the Latin word for “slut” is cunnus. That settles it beyond any doubt for me. I am so much a cunt.

I just came across this, the most comprehensive study if male-on-male rape I’ve ever seen. It’s from 2004, but still fascinating: A Study of Male Rape Survivors [think before following links] https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/17182826.pdf

Well. That’s new. I can’t say I’ve ever seen a jizz fairy. 🤔

This member is no longer here to get an answer to this question, but it was never answered and it seems to want addressing. What are the risks of something going wrong in letting someone remove your genitalia in a non-medical environment? 1. You can bleed out and die. 2. You can get sepsis and die. 3. You can get gangrene and die. 4. You can find yourself having to wear a bag to collect your urine. 5. You can suffer chronic pain for the rest of your life/feel nothing at all in that region for the rest of your life. I’m not a doctor, and I’m sure an actual health care professional could flesh out that list. Take a good, long look at a detailed diagram of the anatomy of the male human body in that area. It’s extremely complex, with various systems interconnecting and mutually dependent. Your genitals aren’t just superfluous dangly bits; your cock is also used for urination; your testicles produce hormones that affect your health in important ways. Making the decision to remove them without careful professional medical consultation is deeply unwise. Actually having them cut off in some Dom’s basement is deeply crazy.

For the love of God. We’ve been trying to stamp out the use of the original word since fucking Reconstruction, and some imbecile thinks coining a new one was a good idea? Society needs fewer words like this, not more. Kill it with fire.

The way you say that - “learn more about being the same way” - makes it sound as if I were further ahead along a path than you are. I’ve actually only been having same-sex contact for less than 17 years now. I wouldn’t say I’ve been actually consciously aware of my nature as a submissive (certainly in a BDSM sense) for more than 12. I didn’t truly understand my inherent role as a cumdump service bottom until four years ago. I constantly have a nagging feeling that I need to make up for lost time, that there were so many men I was supposed to have serviced in my 20s and 30s, and I have a deep deficit I need to try to correct. Rationally I know that’s nonsense, but I can’t shake the feeling deep inside that part of me is very much unfinished. I can feel that deep part of me very clearly sometimes, a core submissive drive. I use the word ‘drive’ because it drives me to do things I wouldn’t otherwise do, like go slut myself to anonymous men in hotels. I feel very distinctly that that part if me is incomplete - that it very, very much needs to be taken to a deeper level, used harder, devolved further. Sometimes I’m frightened to think what would happen if an aggressive, dominant man who revels in power were to discover my need, and command my service - I doubt I could resist. And at the same time, I’m terrified that no such man ever will.

When did I know? What a complicated, complicated question, for me. I think part of my psyche knew from the very beginning of puberty - I had thoughts of being overpowered by masculine figures (even a gorilla at one point(!)) and had thoughts of being manhandled by the much older boy who lived next door. The trouble was, I was a laaaaaaaaate bloomer. So late. So late that, and I shit you not, I didn’t fully understand what homosexuality meant until I got to college. Imagine that for a second - imagine going through all of middle and high school with every other kid around you swimming in hormones and becoming very much sexually aware of themselves and each other, and being almost completely oblivious to all of it. One of my very best friends was gay and I had no idea. I did have a girlfriend, kind of, but he went FtM trans later in life so clearly what the hell did I know. I do know that certain types of guys, mainly jocks, called me a fag in high school. I had no idea what they were talking about, just that it was something I probably didn’t want to be. (In the 80s in Appalachia, it most certainly wasn’t.) maybe they could see something buried in me so deeply I wasn’t even conscious of it. I still didn’t become conscious of it in college, even though on a few occasions I would get random calls to my dorm room asking if I was gay. I always hung up on them. Only at 37, after my marriage ended, did I acknowledge to myself that I was same-sex attracted. On my first fuck I bottomed. It wasn’t discussed, he just fucked me and I took it. And I absolutely loved it. I loved it so much that it shakes me a little to speculate what my life would have been like had some aggressive male introduced me to it as a teen. I feel pretty certain that I would have quickly become aware of my sub nature and probably would have acted on it heavily in college. That would have led to me being a veteran of thousands more fucks than I’ve experienced so far... or I might be dead from HIV. Impossible to know. All I can be certain of is that at my core I believe I was born this way, meant to fill a role in submission to men who need to dominate a man like me.

Christian Wilde has done work for BoundGods, if you haven’t looked there. They don’t fuck around with fishnet pantyhose at BoundGods. No, they do not.

...Okay, I kinda-sorta get the premise of this scene, that the therapist is supposed to have the guy’s mind all twisted, but I got what-the-fucked by the cape the moment it started and could never get past that. The sudden appearance of the fish-net stockings didn’t help matters, though I suppose for anybody who’s a CD that was just great. Somebody at that studio has got a bizarre fetish.

Yeah, I get that a lot. With your hips cocked and back arched like that, it’s a position that causes a Top to assume a true breeding mount and concentrate more power in pelvic thrusting.

That is unwise. The virus doesn’t take vacations. Instead, what it will do is take advantage of the fact that it isn’t being suppressed to replicate and increase your viral load, and possibly increase its reservoirs in your body. I talked to my specialist about this very thing two weeks ago. Many factors could be contributing to your meds not being as effective as they should. Depending on hat you eat and when you eat it in relation to when you take your meds, your diet could be interfering with full potency. Do you use anything like psyllium husk (Metamucil) as prep for cleanout? If used around the time you take your meds, it can actually encapsulate your meds and prevent their absorption (someone on here posted about passing an entire ART pill this way). Stress can be a factor, lack of exercise, certain nutritional deficiencies - or even simply that the med you’re taking isn’t optimal for your body chemistry. There are choices, and a med change might be in order. I strongly encourage you talk to your doctor to try to deduce what may be causing therapeutic failure rather than causing complete therapeutic failure by completely failing to take the therapy.

Remember, a viral load test is an assay to determine the number of copies within a specific sample quantity, and a determination of Undetectable is made if the assay does not find copies in excess of a specified threshold - but it doesn’t mean that the assay didn’t find any. Your UD result probably always has a number of copies per sample returned, you just don’t see that number, and if the UD threshold for that test is 25, your actual VL for that test could have been 24 and you’d never know. But it it came back 26, you would, because as far as the test is concerned you’re no longer Undetectable, and *blip*. Don’t sweat it. I’ve got a great infectious disease specialist and she says blips happen all the time for lots of reasons and if a patient is meds-compliant they usually don’t mean anything except to remind us that the Enemy Virus is still here. And it is - never, ever forget it or become complacent - you have a virus that will kill you if it can. It came within hours of killing me in 2014. Never let your guard down, never miss your meds, or it will jump back up to try to bite you. But if you’re following your treatment, those blips are going to stay low. Whether you’re UD or not becomes a question of statistics as long as you’re maintaining viral suppresion. Since I first became Undetectable in 2015, I’ve had three blips: 65, 43, and 38. Two of those would still have been considered UD under an earlier test with a 50-count threshold, and the third would have been under the prior test with a 200-count threshold. And my last three tests have been UD. Note: I have missed exactly one dose of ART since I started taking it in September 2014. One. Uno. That’s how you keep the number where it needs to be. The only reason I see blips now is that I wasn’t diagnosed or treated until I had a CD4 count of 49 and a VL of 84,000.

The way I look at it, these men who have reached older years are going to display the physical signs of their age, and the physical traits that make a young man in his sexual prime so alluring cannot be expected - that’s the reality. But the appearance doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with what’s inside the man, his desires, his needs, his appetites, even his libido. The inner fires don’t just suddenly go out, yet these men often find that it becomes more difficult fore some of them - and practically impossible for others - to tend those fires. I consider it an important part of my service that I surrender my body to men who might otherwise be unable to experience a moment of physical intimacy with another person. That they may not be what most would consider attractive is of no matter - I am simply the warmth and the flesh and the skin and the wetness that meets their basic human need in that moment. They are people, and they have a right to have that basic need met, yet most would deny them that simply because they don’t please the eye. So I make it a point to make myself available to them and never turn any of them away. So many times I have felt an older man’s hands touch my body for the first time, and often they seem hesitant, or reverent, pausing and stroking gently as though they can hardly believe they have a body there for their very own to enjoy, and are just so grateful for a chance to touch skin that they almost don’t know how to start. Being able to bring fulfillment to someone like that who clearly needs it is strong evidence to me that I was intended to be used by men this way.

@bottomingboy - Before you make a decision, do some background research. Every silver lining is wrapped by a cloud of some sort, and there are risks, disadvantages, downsides and tradeoffs to taking on the Oldest Profession. Especially if, as others here have indicated, featuring yourself in porn is a component of what you do, realize that that is not something that you can keep secret, and that aspect of your life may resurface in the future when you -inevitably - find that you need to make a living doing something else. And you will need to plan for a future beyond this time when you are hott and fresh and desirable to other men. Time is implacable, Age is merciless, and there is a horde of younger flesh hot on your heels ready to edge you out the minute you show any sign of wear. When you hit that point, you don’t want to go job-hunting only to be turned away because you have a public record as a pornstar/escort. There’s also the issue of what would be expected of you by a client who paid you money for your services. When you take Caesar’s coin, you do Caesar’s bidding. Are you prepared to do things you might not want to do, or have done to you, in exchange for that money? Are you prepared to risk men taking what they believe they have paid for whether or not you agree? You’d better be. I’m not telling you not to do it, just to be sure you go into it with your eyes wide open and make sure what you give up, and what you risk, is worth the money you get.

This ^ is an excellent and often overlooked point. I have never had chlamydia in isolation - only in combination with gono. I suspect that most carriers have lax sexual habits that predispose them to being disease vectors, including lack of testing and treatment, so they end up having multiple illnesses. That’s my hypothesis, at least, because I’ve almost always been given a combo at once. For that reason I can’t say for certain if my symptoms are due more to chlamydia or gono, but in general I don’t become aware of an infection until I see blood on toilet paper when wiping. I don’t usually feel itching or burning, but as soon as I see red, it’s, “Well, fuck.” Time to see the doctor. Only once have I had a positive test result that I wasn’t expecting on a routine STD screening.

This thread has made me remember a very early encounter from back when I first started taking cock. I had forgotten about it, but now I recall it very clearly. I had driven out a few miles to meet a young Top who had gotten lost trying to find my house, and led him back to my place. He was a very enthusiastic fuck, but back then I was still neg and still risk-averse and had told him he would need to use a condom. He did, and we had a decent fuck, through orgasm. He took off the condom and rested a little, then I rolled over on my belly and he went another round before he left happy. After he left, though, I noticed that there was only one condom in the garbage, and when I stuck a finger in my ass, I knew what had happened. I confronted him via email, and he replied, “Sorry, I forgot.” Forgot, my ass. I let him know just exactly how unacceptable that was, and that we wouldn’t be hooking up again. Fast-forward a few years to an average night when the twelfth anon cock is pulsing its load into the white pool already in my cunt, and I have to laugh at myself a little - I don’t even carry condoms with me anymore so I can honestly say I don’t have one if a Top asks for one.

If we all agree that a person saying ‘no’ means that consent is not given, then how is the OP’s question any different from “Have you ever raped someone?”, and why ask it any differently? Call a thing what it is.

I had a therapist for 20 years. I’ve been psychoanalyzed and introspected quite, quite comprehensively, I assure you. You’re not wrong in saying that I sound unfulfilled, but very few persons have truly reached a point of complete fulfillment in life. The human condition, as posited by Maslow, is one of perpetual striving for self-actualization. A man’s reach should exceed his grasp, or what’s a Heaven for?