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Your Sexual Identity?


BottomKink

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On 12/8/2017 at 2:54 PM, hungry_hole said:

Right on! I always question the motivation of social movements, such as the gay movement, that focus and dwell on victimization and oppression. I don't see any oppressors because to me there are all victims.

Nah, IMHO, the only victims are people who choose to be victims. 

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On 11/18/2017 at 1:00 AM, BottomKink said:

I've been thinking about the little nitty gritty differences between LGBT and NSA sex. I don't mean to generalize anybody, but, for me I enjoy having sex with men and I also love teasing them online. I've never considered myself to be part of the LGBT group nor do I feel "left behind" or "oppressed" when politicians or religious people say insulting things about same sex encounters, relationships etc etc. For me its about losing inhibition and letting men use me for sex; and if I were to be in a relationship, it'd have to be sex based. 

I was wondering what everybody else's views are on this. 

Something i wonder when i read "nor do i feel left behind or oppressed when politicians or religious people say...," is how old are you, and what kind of culture did you grow up in?  Some here have witnessed a cultural revolution when it comes to guys having sex with guys. Even as recently as 1998, i was arrested and charged with a felony because i asked an undercover cop if he wanted to fuck me.  It was VA and even in '98 a special unit of "vice" cops existed who purposely pretended to be gay and cruising in order to entrap gays.  i was charged with a 100 year old law that made it a felony for two guys to fuck. The attorney general at the time, Bob McDonnell (who later became governor and was indicted for being a criminal), was a virulent anti gay and had told his attorneys to go for the jugular.  

i grew up in an era and religious culture that stated homosexuals were going to hell, or at best, were broken sinners that needed to repent.  Medical books published before 1973 labeled homosexuality as a "disorder."  As a kid, i remember going to the library to try and learn about how i was feeling about guys, and the idea that i was "sick" was just reinforced.  i was an unsophisticated kid and had no info or support to the contrary.  Sure, i eventually processed through all that shit, but it took time and i married a woman and had kids in the process. my former wife and kids remain religious and disowned me when i came to a place of honesty, openness and acceptance about my sexuality. 

I remember a time when the extreme fundamentalist christian religious wanted to make laws to put people in prison for having same sex sex, and i don't doubt for one second that they still would given the opportunity.  

Don't get me wrong, i have overcome my oppressive cultural upbringing, but it wasn't easy.  Think Stockholm Syndrome.  Funny story, i went to the farmers market on PRIDE weekend and there was a PRIDE rally. There was also a group of religious right folk with their posters and megaphone telling us to repent and that we are all going to hell. i raised my hand an flipped them off as i walked by their booth, felt really good. 

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  •      I have no idea where to place myself on this.  I guess I would consider myself BI and not a 'real' member of the LBGT community.   I have been married to the same woman for about 38 1/2 years now.  We have NOT had sexual relations in many years now, since basically her 'change'.  I now almost exclusively have sex with men and am basically a total bottom and somewhat of a cumslut as I do not like condoms and want that load in my hole every time.  I have given some BJs also and though I do not mind them, I much prefer to have my ass pummeled and hard and fast is best.  Size is no consideration although I do find larger ones to feel a little better, but it is the mind set more than size.  I have had cocks in me from about 3" to a good 12" and from barely as big around as one of my fingers, which are rather thin, to as big around as my wrist.  I have also, although it has been a while now, been fisted which felt amazing also.  I really try not to 'cubby hole' people into any one type or another.  I try to treat others as I myself wish to be treated, although I would rather be treated maybe a little rougher. LOL.   
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  • 4 weeks later...

Technical means: Pansexual

Social Simplification: Bisexual

Personal Identity with Friends: Basically Gay

Personal View: Gay with a side of being somewhat into girls, however love the gender spectrum more so than the "end" of cis-gendered women. 

How I feel I might ACTUALLY be: Gay vers top guy who would love to one day hold a man in his 30's/40's/50's in my arms, breed the shit out of him and make him laugh. 

For how I place myself in LGBT: I'm a cisgendered black (biracial) Pan(gay)sexual male who fluxuates from femme to masculine (Not gendered identity, just mannerisms). I have my own look, my own mannerisms, my own way of expression which expresses both my "hetrosexuality," my "homosexuality" and my "bisexuality." For most people, they see me a jokey, black shirt wearing straight Latino. When in reality, I'm a cum-guzzling top who loves being the "mom"/"dad" of the group, and make people laugh with offensive humor. While that identity is not easy to spot as a femme white twink being labeled as a "bottom sub," it's my identity, and it's my expression of my individual component of being "gay." 

Now I bring this up because, as you see, there are many layers to my "identity." Rather than give a long speech of who I am, I just say "Eh, I'm bi, I guess." The reason I like to do so, is because there are many facets to come into play when it comes to my sexuality and identity that may change in the mood for my perspective. Some days I feel very "gay," some days I feel very "straight." Some days I feel very "masc" and some days I feel very "femme." It all depends on the context, the person I'm with and my emotional set. Does that mean I'll wear trucker beaters, ripped jeans, bandana's and sunglasses when feeling masc? No. Does that mean I'll wear frilly outfits or revealing clothing when feeling fem? No. It's just the fluidity of how I feel, and how that changes depending on the situation. To me, that is me being comfortable with myself, and I honestly couldn't have done that without the means of being gay relieving me. "Oh thank God, I'm gay. Now, since I'm a sodomite, I can buy my pink phones, wear high heels and not even stress about it. Why? Cuz' I'm a faggot, what you expect, Hetro'?" Me being "gay" allows me to express myself in mannerisms, postures and accessories without the fear of being concerned about my "masculinity" all the time. If I were straight (which, thank God I'm not) I honestly would be a wreck. My voice is too whiney, my body is too skinny and my "ego" is smaller than a Mormon Boy's tight little hole. Face it kids, Daddy don't go for Judgy Girls, just Judgy Queens ;)

So, for me, LGBT allows my expression of oneself to have a sense of "It's okay to be you." Where I live, it's possible to be fired for your sexuality, and it's easy to be harrassed and attacked for such as well. So, for me, my identity obviously is important. So, with that, LGBT and my identity at least to me, coincides. Now, there's obviously the argument of "Why don't you just act like a man, and keep your sex life out of my business." Well, this is the heteronormative argument of "Shhhhh. Can you stop being yourself, we need to make way for the Great Straights." Which bothers me to my core, because I don't see our society ONLY wanting everyone to be masc. We like femme girls, we have a culture of straight guys getting off to girls with dicks, there's burly men who like twinks, and there's the occasional "I want someone cook me fooooooooooood, I need a wifeyyyyyyyyyyy." So, I say, why not have men present themselves in the spectrum that can be part of the gay community. We don't have to worry about "straight-dum," we're gay. Let's enjoy it.

And for me, to enjoy it properly, we need to change things, accept people, and recognize the complexity of people's individuality. And that sounds so gay, it makes me wet, it makes me cum........ I hope someone got my Contrapoints joke..... 

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31 minutes ago, Sunovabesh said:

Technical means: Pansexual

Social Simplification: Bisexual

Personal Identity with Friends: Basically Gay

Personal View: Gay with a side of being somewhat into girls, however love the gender spectrum more so than the "end" of cis-gendered women. 

How I feel I might ACTUALLY be: Gay vers top guy who would love to one day hold a man in his 30's/40's/50's in my arms, breed the shit out of him and make him laugh. 

For how I place myself in LGBT: I'm a cisgendered black (biracial) Pan(gay)sexual male who fluxuates from femme to masculine (Not gendered identity, just mannerisms). I have my own look, my own mannerisms, my own way of expression which expresses both my "hetrosexuality," my "homosexuality" and my "bisexuality." For most people, they see me a jokey, black shirt wearing straight Latino. When in reality, I'm a cum-guzzling top who loves being the "mom"/"dad" of the group, and make people laugh with offensive humor. While that identity is not easy to spot as a femme white twink being labeled as a "bottom sub," it's my identity, and it's my expression of my individual component of being "gay." 

Now I bring this up because, as you see, there are many layers to my "identity." Rather than give a long speech of who I am, I just say "Eh, I'm bi, I guess." The reason I like to do so, is because there are many facets to come into play when it comes to my sexuality and identity that may change in the mood for my perspective. Some days I feel very "gay," some days I feel very "straight." Some days I feel very "masc" and some days I feel very "femme." It all depends on the context, the person I'm with and my emotional set. Does that mean I'll wear trucker beaters, ripped jeans, bandana's and sunglasses when feeling masc? No. Does that mean I'll wear frilly outfits or revealing clothing when feeling fem? No. It's just the fluidity of how I feel, and how that changes depending on the situation. To me, that is me being comfortable with myself, and I honestly couldn't have done that without the means of being gay relieving me. "Oh thank God, I'm gay. Now, since I'm a sodomite, I can buy my pink phones, wear high heels and not even stress about it. Why? Cuz' I'm a faggot, what you expect, Hetro'?" Me being "gay" allows me to express myself in mannerisms, postures and accessories without the fear of being concerned about my "masculinity" all the time. If I were straight (which, thank God I'm not) I honestly would be a wreck. My voice is too whiney, my body is too skinny and my "ego" is smaller than a Mormon Boy's tight little hole. Face it kids, Daddy don't go for Judgy Girls, just Judgy Queens ;)

So, for me, LGBT allows my expression of oneself to have a sense of "It's okay to be you." Where I live, it's possible to be fired for your sexuality, and it's easy to be harrassed and attacked for such as well. So, for me, my identity obviously is important. So, with that, LGBT and my identity at least to me, coincides. Now, there's obviously the argument of "Why don't you just act like a man, and keep your sex life out of my business." Well, this is the heteronormative argument of "Shhhhh. Can you stop being yourself, we need to make way for the Great Straights." Which bothers me to my core, because I don't see our society ONLY wanting everyone to be masc. We like femme girls, we have a culture of straight guys getting off to girls with dicks, there's burly men who like twinks, and there's the occasional "I want someone cook me fooooooooooood, I need a wifeyyyyyyyyyyy." So, I say, why not have men present themselves in the spectrum that can be part of the gay community. We don't have to worry about "straight-dum," we're gay. Let's enjoy it.

And for me, to enjoy it properly, we need to change things, accept people, and recognize the complexity of people's individuality. And that sounds so gay, it makes me wet, it makes me cum........ I hope someone got my Contrapoints joke..... 

Amazingly well written.  I love the way you think. Bravo

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I think gay guys date, form relationships, can love each other, etc. A gay relationship is between two equals.

I consider myself a faggot. I don't date or get to know Men, and I certainly don't approach Men as my equal. I just offer my holes to Men, they use me, dump their loads, then go. I'm happy to be used. I've accepted that, as a faggot cum slut, I'll never have a relationship. I can only hope to suck a Man off more than once.

Maybe one day, a hot Man will claim me as his live in slave. From The outside it may appear that we're boyfriends, but I would be his sex slave and inferior.

So, I'm not gay. I am a faggot. There is a difference.

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2 hours ago, ThroatFag said:

I think gay guys date, form relationships, can love each other, etc. A gay relationship is between two equals.

I consider myself a faggot. I don't date or get to know Men, and I certainly don't approach Men as my equal. I just offer my holes to Men, they use me, dump their loads, then go. I'm happy to be used. I've accepted that, as a faggot cum slut, I'll never have a relationship. I can only hope to suck a Man off more than once.

Maybe one day, a hot Man will claim me as his live in slave. From The outside it may appear that we're boyfriends, but I would be his sex slave and inferior.

So, I'm not gay. I am a faggot. There is a difference.

This is me. Except, I do identify as gay.

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For the past 10 years, I've identified as bisexual or bicurious when I was starting to explore my sexuality. Sometimes I wonder if I turned gay, especially these past three years, but honestly I'm on the who the fuck cares side of things these days. Sure there are still idiots in the world who'll give you grief for your sex life or "lifestyle" as my grandparents or some of my conservative minded friends in the Caribbean would say. To me the only thing that matters is if you're happy, and are the people in your life who care about you happy? Sexually I identify as a slut, and would definitely need a boyfriend or girlfriend or god forbid I'm married, a hot husband or hot wife who's cool with both of us sleeping around. Because I realised I cannot be faithful with my cocklust, and I'm not even going to try. Though to be honest, I want kids, I want some fun, and I want whomever I'm with to have fun too.

Edited by hornycumslut91
Grammar
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  • 2 years later...

Socially, I have labeled myself Bisexual, over the past 30 plus years of meeting other men for sex. I chose this label for the sake of avoiding long tedious discussions, and sometimes arguments. However, I feel I lean heavily over to the Straight end of the Kinsey spectrum. Its not out of shame or guilt, its just how I feel. When I have sex with other men, its more about the adventures-erotic experience, than it is a physical or emotional attraction. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Love seeing the array of responses here!

Personally, it depends who is asking (obviously "none of your business" if I don't see a valid reason for you to know).

To people I know less well, "gay" works. It's a commonly understood term that gets the general point across - sexual and romantic attraction only to the same sex.

To actual friends and such, I don't identify as any label. The terms "gay" and "LGBTQ+" have become pretty loaded. In the past I used it, and was suddenly hit with a bunch of ideological, political, personal, and philosophical presuppositions. My own friends (who I lived with during uni at the time) were jumping to conclusions about everything from my passtimes and musical tastes to my voting opinions and life ambitions, and they became a bit dissonant when I had to correct them. Even after that, I had to "re-come out" 26 times (counted for the laughs) on account of people forgetting because... reasons...

Personally, I identify as me. There is no "gay" identity label or personal/community connection to other "gays" that I feel, nor does it have any tangential bearing on other things I do and enjoy. At the same time, I'm fully content to state that the people I find sexually and/or romantically attractive only have been men and only conceivably could be men, and that I act on those attractions willingly and happily, but that is as far as that goes.

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Guest WelshBBCigarFuck

I identify as Gay as I am a man who enjoys sex with men and who has never had any sexual interest in women.
I don’t care if the person who I am having sex with identifies as gay, bi, curious, straight, as long as they are a man then I am happy. Generally sexually I do tend to go for the big burly bear or leather man look as a preference but it’s not set in stone, it all depends on the person.
 

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