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Is there a particular experience that first made you know you were gay or bi?


profwhtforhung

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I always knew I was different than everyone else; the sociocultural environment of the 60s and 70s Midwest US didn't tolerate variation well at all - it was made clear beyond clear to me that whatever else was happening, I was not in tune with the majoritarian view. I wondered if I was gay. I tried talking to the child psychiatrist they sent me to because I was having emotional trouble (brought on by the rampant unkindness I lived with daily) and he wouldn't even discuss it with me. In a way, he took his job to be making sure those thoughts went nowhere.

I first said to myself "Wow. I'm gay," at age 13. The setting: Disney World in Orlando, Florida on vacation with my parents. We were getting a quickie sailing lesson and found myself looking at the instructor, who was a good-looking dark-haired male, wondering what he thought of me, if maybe he would mistake me for a girl, and how much I wanted him to be interested in me. It was like being hit by lightening, stunning and disorienting. That was the start of my struggle with self-acceptance.

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For me it was sitting waiting for a train when i was about 17.  This older guy was down the other end of the station and i could really sense his presence.  He was cruising me; i just didn’t know the rules. He slowly got closer and closer, eventually sitting on the same bench as me.  i was tingling all over, so nervous and turned on that i could barely breathe.  Nothing happened.  My train came and i got on, but i knew then that there was not way i’d be able to suppress my same-sex attraction .    It was only a matter of time. 

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I always had crushes on girls and women and never felt that way about guys.  I still don't.  I was a horny kid, though. Through a set of circumstances I can't mention here, I found that I loved having things in my hole at age 11.   In college, I became good friends with a fellow car guy and he eventually came out to me. I didn't think anything of it as it wasn't any big deal to me.  I think that planted a seed in my brain as when I went into a porn store, I picked up some gay porn mags out of curiosity, and found I was very turned on.  It wasn't until after college when I was married that I tried sex (with a condom) with another married guy.   That started my down low hook ups, in which I eventually dropped the condoms.  Both my ex-wife and my current GF know that I like sex with guys on occasion, but not how much!  Given my experience as a teen (that I can't mention here), it should have been obvious that I would have liked to have been fucked by guys, but it never entered my thoughts until my friend came out to me.    I sure wish it had and wonder what my life would have been like if, like many here, I hooked up with men as a teen.  

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I definitely didnt know what "gay" or "straight" was in kindergarten but I remember having a crush on a classmate that was another boy and loved sitting with him and everything. Growing up it was more natural to me being with other boys like my friends and I never paid any attention to girls. I also grew up on a lot of anime in the 90s, and I had a huge crush on the men. I remember being in love with SSJ2 Gohan all through middle school lol. In middle school, I did a lot of experimenting with my guy friends and this is when I remember first developing a huge fetish for guys feet. In high school in 10th grade, I fell in love with Kevin. I was turning tricks, and then I went into doing porn when I was 18. Bathhouses by 19, sex expos and events by 19 and 20.

Girls were never a thing for me as far back as I can remember throughout my life.

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I have no interest in football but my Dad was a fanatical Manchester City fan (being a true Mancunian supporting United was unthinkable!)  He used to drag me to matches as a kid. Once, when I was about 9, he somehow got a pass to go behind the scenes after a match. It was back in the days when players had communal baths. I didn’t know I was gay before I went in but after seeing 11 professional football players naked in a bath, I sure as hell knew when I came out. 

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Like some others here, I should of guessed earlier as the signs were there, but I failed to join the dots.  I always got on better with boys than girls at school, and thrived going to a boys only senior school.  I also played with my hole a lot and when I went to uni and got a girlfriend, found that I enjoyed being pegged more than fucking her, and when watching porn, I was far more likely to focus on the guy than the woman.  It was letting go after breaking up with another long term girlfriend (with whom I enjoyed several MMF 3-sums and learned that I liked sucking cock) that I went for it and realised that I liked it both ways, more so with guys... and that feeling has become moew concrete over time...    

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As a very young kid, my well-to-do grandma would take me to the theatre/opera/ballet, most of which I didn't really appreciate enough at the time.

One Christmas, Aged 7 or 8, she took me to see The Nutcracker which was a bit of a tradition and at intervial she asked me what I enjoyed most about it... and there was only one thing I really liked, so I told her.

The big bulges at the front of the men's tights...

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I didn't have an aha moment till my mid 20s but the signs were always there. I forgot it happened till recently...but I had a crush on this boy when I was like 6 or 7 and I like bit his neck (idunno why) and when I was like 13 my grandmother used to say if I didn't behave I'd end up going to jail and being a prison bitch (which looking back is a kinda fucked up thing to tell a 13 year old) but it really turned me on, to the point I was having wet dreams  about it every night....it didn't truly click though till like 10 years later when I got with this older guy and got the best fucking I've ever had..after that I realized I'm just gay and rather be with men

 

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On 11/28/2022 at 4:50 AM, NHeat said:

When I was 14, I had a wet dream about a boy I went to school with. He wasn't that cute and was kind of a jerk, but my mind must have thought otherwise.

my first ever sexual wet dream was when i was age around 11............i seemed to be somewhere like a turkish or roman sauna but going back 2000 yrs ago.......in this dream i was basically raped and used by dozens of men aged 30 to 50....i was scared with the first one raping me then started to enjoy it - they were barebacking me roughly.......i woke up in a huge puddle of cum.........ive wondered ever since about that dream and where it came from as i knew nothing of rape/saunas/baths/turks or romans..........sometimes feel it couldve been a past life being relived if were reincarnated?

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