PozTalkAuthor

This habit to consider personal experiences as global ones, should stop now! Especially talking about a sensitive topic as sex is. Everyone of us has their own life and this must be considered! Treating something personal as it was general or vice-versa has never led so far away! There's a world outside, let's explore it all and become more curious.

I love this, and you also published the second chapter -"solemn vows"- telling us you were preparing the third (acceptance)

Personal experience doesn't make statistic; is it difficult to understand? Saying "not engaging in anal sex is a lie" or "if you find the right person you'll do everything" is like saying "being gay? You are such because you didn't find the right woman" Makes no sense.

I don't really understand these conflicts, saying "sides aren't a real thing" means discriminating all those people who don't rely on anal/genital contact for any reason. Mental, physical, whatever. Would you tell "you don't exist" to a person who has no hands and needs to be masturbated, or nothing? Would you tell them "you require a sex assistant, not an ordinary dating app"? Why the fuck? Or if that person has had an operation preventing them to use their "ordinary" sex organs? Why shouldn't people get pleasure by other body parts? Declining it is our right, and freedom. Being rude is unpolite, regardless of disability and stuff. Let's behave as an inclusive, open-minded, community ourselves, before asking OTHERS to accept us. Let's learn to accept ourselves even considering different ways to live sexuality. And, last but not least, yes. Nowadays the problem might no longer exist but finding pleasures without genital-anal involvement could also be an opportunity for HIV positive folks BEFORE UEqualsU and PrEP discovery. I clearly can't talk about others, but, I've actually grown up being a "side": at the beginning, the idea of anal sex scared me so I used oral, manual, and cuddles. Until I found the right man, both for top and bottom role. Then, after HIV diagnosis, fear of genital-anal contacts came up again! I laugh now thinking of it, but the fact to be open to full body exploration has allowed me to take control of myself again. Even my current relationship started in the "side"'s way: cuddles, kisses, nipple play and so on, brought us gradually where we are now. Then, if you have a relationship with a self-claimed "side", you have other needs and cheat on him? Or have an open relationship, or no affair at all? It's their own business! We must accept and admit that we all think different: me into full body contacts, being naked as essential, others even remain clothed just freeing their cock and enjoy sex in that way, gloryholes where to shove your member in, without even knowing what body stays to the other side... I'd never conceive sexuality in that way but, what's next? Why should I be rude towards someone having fun like this? Respect is the key. PozTalkAuthor in lecture dress [kidding, of course] - no intention to lecture anyone, I'm just wondering why, in a world full of conflicts, we need to create them for sex too.

Yeah, I got it! And understood it; thanks for having added this, as from my previous post the meaning could be misunderstood. The problem persists anyways, as it's the beginning of pornography criminalization. Then the step from here to ban every content regarding sex (including sex education) is very, very short. Wearing the paranoid mask now LOL

Oh fuck! Why this! Nothing bad in being side, or side-verse; preferring manual, oral, or other stimulation than penis-anus is anyone's freedom. But insulting is not appropriate in any circumstance. God, nature, universe call it anyway you want, has made us with a body and a mind; why on Earth not use them? I could suppose that one person may just want cuddles, kisses and wank because they've got a serious movement disability preventing them from having an "ordinary" sexual life. Or, better said, they don't live sexuality as we are used to know about it. In such a case life might be frustrating (I've personally been stalked by a woman with a disability but NEVER indulged them), someone of them feels "untouchable" given that a huge quantity of people, making a serious MISTAKE, forgives any action for "pity" reasons; but in case a person in physical impairment condition reacts insulting or worse when encountering different sexual desires than theirs, it's harmful both for themselves and for people with disabilities in general as others may judge a whole community due to a single person's behaviour. Then, I suppose there are also many folks without any particular condition but feeling unsure, uncomfortable with their sexuality, and when hearing someone who has a different desire, they act as "I would like, but I can't". Aggressivity and envy of "I'd like to have it up my ass too, but I never admit it and get frustrated towards you who admit it so frankly". Signed: a proudly side-verse man who never understands insults, when just a "NO" is enough.

This matter of punishing even people who use a VPN is even more dangerous than the "anti-porn" laws themselves. This is the introduction to government censorship I'm not one of those believing in conspiracy or stuff, I talk as a computer professional: true that VPN's and anonymizers are sometimes used to harm, but well, even knives. Even cars... And PILLOWS have been used to kill, sometimes. So? Do we give punishments to people having a pillow at home? The most serious problem is that politicians proposing and voting these rules, use an existing problem (need to protect minors from inappropriate contents), for making citizens accept strict anti-freedom rules. And why all of this? Because they do not want to make the effort of working in EDUCATION. It's hard to do, it's long and slow, but it's long-lasting too. I'm European and many countries are discussing these "internet-killer" laws too. Voting is the only way we have, to defend ourselves! But when they put children in propaganda, for non-rational people it's very very difficult! I have a 15-months-old nephew, my twin sister's giving me a niece in 2024, who knows what I'd do if someone ever tries to put their hands on my family. But I'm enough rational and experienced in Internet and computers, to understand that prohibition is not effective. It represses adults, who then might even between violent to the same children they want to protect. If you don't have access to porn any longer what do you do? With the horniness you used to satisfy seeing naked folks on video/pic, you just try to manipulate ordinary social networks and chats visitors, to get them naked in your private chat sessions. That's all. P.S. - same to make porn access difficults, are the same to promote weapons! Sorry, I'm always frank while I talk. As usual.

But the roblem is: does the virus think the same way? HIV might have their own mind and decide that staying into a homophobic repressed gay's blood stream, is not their thing! Or, they could finally transform that asshole!

this senator needs the virus, no doubt on it!

Personally I've no picture and have no intention to upload one, and last year when I joined I assumed to be ignored by anyone. And I found respect instead! Confront (even on difficult topics) and respect, by people here. Then, with someone I have roleplay fun, with others it's just small talk, I participate to discussion when I find it appropriate, and no worries. It's a forum and IMHO sending our own real life related multimedia material mustn't be mandatory. But for hookup, not at all! Being this a public site I'd never leave my personal phone number here! Maybe the author has simply found the wrong place to hookup in! Sorry I am quite laughing now, fantasizing about myself trying to access a dating app and talk there like I do here. I'd be the world's clown 🤡🤡🤡 Anyway I'm really happy any time someone writes "nice profile" on my box or follows me, I'm please to wake someone's interest in confront. Then, they just come (cum?) and go, I don't claim long-lasting friendships here! I have already many very good friends in real life.

Planned and consenting, he was a trusted person. We started dating and used condoms at first both me on top role, and him. Then we decided to give it up and feel "more natural" we said!

sorry honey I saw it just now! Becoming nastier and nastier! On the other hand, I'm longing to see if the main character's gifter has managed to tempt Aaron into chasing

Hookup apps are for occasional adventures! That's all! And what I always say is to be very careful with people seeming "too romantic" "too perfect" just the right person at the right moment... My ex's mother was the target of a "romantic scam" there! I honestly feel quite scared especially for folks dreaming the person of their life. Maybe mine is a bias too, due to professional circumstances exposing me to the worst of the worst about on line relationships. But we can't create illusions on ourselves! You say your partner is not into kisses and cuddles soo much, oh, damn, I'm just wondering how someone can dislike this in a long-term relationship whatever you call it! Maybe it's me, for me body contact is essential when you're intimate. Then, as I said before, a real "model of relationship" doesn't really exist, "designing" romance in a way rather than another, is a social construct to allow people to control each other in sex and feelings. Coming out: I've been 6 years with a girl - sexless, just cuddles and kisses and I've never known if she was faithful or not. I think not... The first person I came out as gay with, she's still rarely in touch with me. But looking back I remember friends talking about frustration they assumed I felt, they said "take care of her or she'll cheat on you"... I actually cared for her but not how they meant. With first guy, then, it's been much much different!

that's a forever bond! 🦠☣️

Everyone has their own character and way of living. IMHO the mistake stands on the habit to create a "model" a habit, such as "hetero are like this and gays like that". You are not wrong because you don't feel romance, I am not wrong because I'm queer and eternal romantic! We are simply ourselves.

Getting HIV is (at the moment) a permanent condition which requires lifelong treatments. And we can't always count on others who pay, in America and the rest of the world. I respect people who became positive for real, everyone has their own reason and I think that if one has made this decision, they've already thought of it enough; did they talk to counselors, to therapists and doctors... They nowadays know the possible choices and behave accordingly and in front of such a decision we have to stop and respect - that doesn't mean share or approve, but respect someone who thinks differently from us, has opposite values than us. I don't think that an affirmation like this could work: "you do it because your country can (still) afford treatments, what if tomorrow they won't"... There are many factors involved, making a wannabe "bug chaser" feel guilty talking about future of treatment does not do the trick to change their mind, honestly I think people don't consider "the future" in many ways... Including voting for politicians whose intention is to interrupt sexual freedom... so... Anyway people to be scared of the most, aren't chasers and gifters but all those underground folks who never test and go spread it around without knowing, and if possible, lecturing others about morality and so on. Fuck, I've been repressing what's called "HIV fetish" for years, I've spent more than a decade, let's say 20 years at least, wondering why I got sexually excited from the idea of transmitting a permanent infection to someone; I was still negative and secretly fantasized of giving it to my partner... And when I got the real HIV I felt dirty, guilty and dangerous. Infection completely unwanted. My journey to accept my status (kinks included) has been long and difficult, many overwhelming emotions and events, to find the conclusion that mine is simply a "biological bond fetish" which found its revelation in HIV. Psy said it was due to my very bad relationship with my biological father, but after trying to forgive him, then closing up again due to his homophobia, and his death at beginning of this year, has made me realize life without him is better. HIV _would_ be a way to be linked biologically to someone you choose? This is my reason for this kink but then? What's next? "people you choose", in the real world, means nothing because life changes and relationships can develop in unexpected ways so, if you have the responsibility of giving such an infection to someone, whenever the relation changes for the worst, what might be a "permanent biological bond romantically or friendly chosen" might become worse than the worst abusive parent-child or siblings relationship - with even legal implications. It's not worth it! So, I always thank Breeding Zone for technology and meds for science, to have given me THE GIFT of openly confronting my fantasy with roleplay on Internet with _many_ neg guys having fun with me, and in real life my boyfriend playing along with me, having bareback sex, and my undetectable status keeps him safe. Fantasy and role play do not harm, but it's essential to distinguish FANTASY and DESIRE. For giving and receiving HIV, in my own experience, fantasy is OK, desire (wanting to make it real) isn't appropriate at all. A hug to anyone has, or has had, fun with me.