tallslenderguy

Kissing on the lips? There has to be visual, or some other connected attraction beyond the surface. But, kissing other parts of the body? i have a FB of four years Who kissed my back, neck and shoulders while fucking me and it drives me absolutely wild, puts me deep into subspace for some reason. Within the last year or so, He's really gotten into me giving Him oral as foreplay and turns out He loves when i kiss Him too. Thighs, cock, balls, back, ass... i'll spread His beautiful ass and kiss His hole too. He's not very vocal when He Tops, but just the opposite when i'm giving Him oral. He is normally all sex and lust, but when i am kissing Him, He gets more open and vulnerable. Regardless, He obviously loves it and i love the deepened effect it has on our bonding... it's a little magical. But i don't view kissing as routine or just physical, i want it to further open and affect, deepen our lust.

Ha, just seeing this discussion, missed it first go round. Out of prolly a few thousand connections with guys, i can count on one hand the number of times i've felt "anger." Twice to be exact. i was pretty faggoty as a little kid and, before i constructed a closet to hide in, i attracted a lot of bullies. i got picked on and beat up, seemed to attract bullies like a magnet to lead filings. Retrospectively, i've come to believe that what i often experienced was early age, and an immature/ignorant version of, D/s dynamic. i'm pretty naturally sub and i think a lot of the bullies were naturally dom, but at that early age none of us had a clue how to deal with our attractions or nature. But the bullying did leave its impression on me, it molded me. To this day, i have an almost visceral aversion to force, meanness, bullying. i also practiced martial arts for 25 years, and i think that was largely a compensatory thing for me, a response to childhood bullying. One guy tried to dominate me using a bullying approach as he started to fuck me. i didn't have to say anything though. my response was reflexive and my body tensed in a sort of attack response, he read my body language immediately and changed his approach just as fast. The emotion i experienced was definitely anger. It wasn't a rational response though, just suddenly there and just as suddenly gone once he backed off on the aggressive part. The other time was at a bathhouse. i was lying on my back and the guy was straddling me and suddenly pinched my nipples really hard lol. i'm not a masochist at all (well, maybe spanking), and my nipples are only erogenous with very light touch. Same immediate reflexive response, he was suddenly on the floor with me straddling him and this look of shock on his face. Again, once the 'threat' was gone, so was the anger, which he seemed to see as well, so we continued and He knew not to try that again . i think it's easy, and pretty common, for guys to be presumptuous in the easy sex hook up world we live in. Mostly i attribute that to immaturity, and i equate self absorption/self centeredness with immaturity. For me, sex is about connecting mutual need/desire. i believe it should be symbiotic, and that requires some amount of communication. That "communication" may be as basic as a hole silently presenting in a dark room or at a GH, but it gets the message across. And really, having a cock up ones ass is pretty intimate. Some may take that as an invitation to fist, how they attempt it and how permission is granted can vary though.

Have always been a level 6. Even prior to PrEP and meds that reduce HIV to a non issue for most, i still found the risk to be less of a factor than the need/drive for that kind of connection with a man. i was never a chaser, never wanted an STD. If a guy tells me he is currently infected with some pathogen, i'm going to forgo sex with him... but that's pretty rare knowledge, especially with anonymous hook up. Sero sorting is mostly an illusion because few guys honestly know their STD status every moment. Over time, i've come to see the fear and attitudes towards sex, and the STD's we may encounter in the process, as largely culturally conditioned. We don't give up on driving to the grocery store because there's a risk we could die in a fiery car crash. Life is full of risk. It seems the fuller the life, the fuller the risk. i see living as a sort of balancing act. We can live in a bubble and go to our grave having never experienced half the wonders that life offers, or we might rush through our life quickly by doing stuff that ends it faster. For me? i look for balance... what can i do that brings pleasure and joy to myself and others and is the cost worth it? For me? BB has always been a risk that is worth it. If i get an STD, i don't see it as much different from getting a cold from someone at a fine restaurant i ate at.

i hear this. Fiber is key. Rice is an easy source that you can get just about anywhere when traveling. When i travel, i also buy food at a grocery store from the produce section. Supplements can be iffy, veggies, grain and fruit are what our bodies are adapted too. Knowing the difference between soluble and insoluble fiber is also key [think before following links] https://www.healthline.com/health/soluble-vs-insoluble-fiber For long term health, i'd suggest following EuRawBull's example and not take drugs like imodium, or on the other end of the spectrum, laxatives as they are just short term fixes with negative side effects. Most of us wanna be fuckable our whole life, so i'd advocate for proactive prevention and colon health, and that means a managed diet full of natural fiber.

i bought a cheap shower head with a flexible hose for travel and a pair of pliers. i already have the douche nozzle. Takes 5 minutes to remove the shower nozzle and attach the hose with the shower head, then i just exchange the shower head when i need to douche and put the shower head back on when i need to shower. Cheap and easy, did a quick amazon search, here's one for $17 US [think before following links] [think before following links] https://www.amazon.com/FASDUNT-Pressure-Handheld-Stainless-Adjustable/dp/B0C45VWVF9/ref=sr_1_7?crid=8RP9F5QZ1RGE&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.YPQaAJESLUFdGlYkHu9vLeCy7qkUv0s-IYq3CBvoBA-8_f_9biO-J68qZiVRPmlRlkvrIMNaNMCvJwFjmcCnm1WruI_hEdJUk9UU-Ur2rh9ZjAdO0L1L3ZdjzIAN7zs1cvAztYLSou7fcb0gpUSmiUmsuwqjIn4YaVxwN1TTdVN0X_PsaCWHHQXc1ds8jPpXWuifWBM9tW3XM_AJq7CQinQlD3L0z6ZWXK91gx65iQGIHN632COTnAtgLxCtXuTEIIXwS0DjKPRlc9WsuS4vnEBavwomWnPpwmdhg7LWrSI.chgVSW5PviseXqbCA8HSZGl0-tZzZ8dxZizEhqQwDHY&dib_tag=se&keywords=shower%2Bhead%2Bwith%2Bhandheld&qid=1717934721&sprefix=shower%2Bhead%2Bwi%2Caps%2C161&sr=8-7&th=1

A bit more... Beyond the chemical component of an added, external drug (i.e., the cognitive and emotional elements). The fact that you "want to top/breed," to me speaks of a part of you that is not bottom. As i see it, the sexual spectrum is infinitely individual, and can be fluid (for some more than others). i wonder if you've been habitually bottom, and if you maybe psych yourself out, fearing you cannot get hard can keep you from getting hard. Do you wake up hard? Or do you get hard when not really thinking about it? That would indicate that, physiologically, you can get hard. If that's the case, then i'd suggest that you keep nurturing your desire to breed this guy, fantasize, masturbate, imagine, etc., fucking and breeding this guy to sorta overwhelm your habitual practice of being a bottom? i'm totally speculating here, just some thoughts.

i think it depends on why you cannot get hard? Sex is physical, but it's also hugely affected by cognition and emotion. i get rock hard when a Top talks to me about wanting to breed me, use my hole, inseminate me, piss on/in me, etc.. (my list is pretty long lol). If a guy wants me to fuck him? No response. Even when i want to try, nothing. i love Mens asses, they are one of my favorite parts of Their anatomy, a huge turn on, but i have no desire/need to penetrate. Even getting sucked. i've had FB's where i allow getting sucked, but it really does little to nothing for me. i will get sort of hard while it's happening if i don't think about it, but any focus on my penis as a penetrative organ, it goes flaccid. i do think meds like viagra can help, but i also think there can be a placebo effect in play with those drugs.

Great question and discussion, thanks for starting it Iker80. Coming out of a conservative religious traditional marriage to a woman, one of the things i questioned for a long time was social notions of masculine and feminine. i still don't have black or white definitions, a lot of shading. i tend to put my sexuality in terms of Top/bottom, Dom/sub... me being very bottom with a decided dose of sub. i do not relate to being feminine. Indeed, sexually speaking, women are a turn off. There's a 'feel' (beyond physical) i get from a woman that i have never gotten from a man, Top, bottom, Dom, sub or otherwise. i've been with a FtM transperson, who i really liked, but sexually they didn't work for me... and it wasn't their lack of a penis. To me, sex is about "cock" and giving or receiving it. And "cock" is way more than a penis to me. It's the drive, energy, need, desire to penetrate, fuck, control, possess, inseminate, impregnate. Those are all things i crave and am wired to receive. Is that "feminine?" Not fully in my experience. i question if it's even possible for a man to be feminine in the same way as a woman? i have videos of me being fucked. The first time i saw one, i was surprised at the sounds i made. i sounded pretty fem to me lol, and was a little embarrassed that i make those sounds. So there is that. Another thing is i am very responsive to my Tops energy, lust, need. Those things do not create my response, but He does evoke my response. For instance, If He wants and sees me as His "bitch," that 'submissive bitch' surfaces in me. Again, it's not role play, or me putting on for Him, to me it may be experiencing part of that expression or of Masculine/feminine where He has possession and control of me... i've had Guys Who wanted me to wear lacy panties or lingerie, similar response from me. Those are not things i do on my own, but responsively. i know my sexuality is connected to and controlled (not created) by the Man i am with... i do not know if that has fem tone, but it's never 'woman.'

i've never been straight or Bi, but tried to de-gay myself and was married to a woman for many years (for those who do not know me, the cause was religion). Straight sex fucked me up for sure during that period of my life. i did learn that sex is so much more than physical during that time, and i learned a great deal about myself and my nature. Trying to be something one is not only causes harm to all involved. i'm really glad i'm not Bi, that would seem schizophrenic to me, but then i'm at the far end of the sexual spectrum.

i don't wanna cum... it really disappoints me if a guy wants to use my penis to make me cum. i love Him controlling my need for orgasm, owning it and redirecting that need/energy towards His orgasm and cum. i wasn't sure if this was just an untenable fantasy, but i've had a FB for 4 years Who breeds me a couple of times a week... He often sucks me and i Him, but He has only ever cum in my ass and He has never made me cum in the 4 years He's been breeding me. i've learned that when i am getting regular orgasm and cum from a Man, that's all i need or want. If i havent gotten it in awhile, i'll jack and cum, but i'm always disappointed... it's not what i need or want. The only orgasm i want "guaranteed" is the one a Top has in me.

Not all that scientific, but fun to see. i suppose it's not far off, but i think where tests like this fail is in defining terms... for instance "degradee" has pretty individual and specific meaning to me. If it's done in a mean or bullying way, it totally shuts me down, definitely doesn't evoke the sub or bottom in me. On the other hand, a subtle, affectionate connection? Totally arouses and bonds me to the Guy. == Results from bdsmtest.org == 91% Submissive 76% Degradee 68% Rope bunny 66% Experimentalist 62% Boy/Girl 60% Ageplayer 59% Voyeur 50% Non-monogamist 49% Vanilla 44% Exhibitionist 35% Primal (Prey) 25% Pet 13% Slave 0% Daddy/Mommy 0% Rigger 0% Brat 0% Brat tamer 0% Degrader 0% Dominant 0% Masochist 0% Master/Mistress 0% Owner 0% Primal (Hunter) 0% Sadist 0% Switch

Four years. Ranges from Him breeding me a 3 or 4 times a week to once a month. A Bi Guy , 27 now. i love Him, sweet and passionate, vocal when i am doing oral with Him, front and back, quiet when He He fucking me... alternating from kissing my back affectionately to pounding and "bitching" me (He's a Muscle Guy"). i think He's conflicted as a Bi Guy. Talks of women, is passionate as fuck until He cums, then He's totally done, pulls out and showers, but always leaves me full of cum.

i own several cages, but for me, over time, they've become more accessories, sort of jewelry that accessorize. For me (and i suspect for many others), chastity is more than physical, though on the sexual spectrum, i figure chastity is still an individual experience. i see a "cock" as way more than a penis. Most of a "Cock" to me is the drive, desire, need, behind it, to penetrate, fuck, control, inseminate, impregnate, possess, mark, etc.. In that respect, i don't have a "cock," so caging it is a sort of false affirmation and can miss a true connection between me and the Top Who sees it. i've tried cages on, but i've never caged myself... to me (again, not making universal assertions), that feels contradictory. In a sense, my 'cage' is already in place, it's natural. But i don't really see it like i have a cock in a cage, because i don't see myself as having a "cock" (as described above). i don't really feel i have a word to describe what i have. Some call it a "clit," borrowing from heteronormative culture, but that isn't accurate. i'm not a woman, i'm not trans, i'm not effeminate (not saying anything wrong with those, but none describe me). On an infinite spectrum, i'm somewhere in between. my penis is a sex organ that can derive physical pleasure from being used, but the typical ways our cultural conditioning has of relating to it don't fit for me, so while it may feel good to me physically to orgasm from having my penis used, does not feel good or fitting psychologically. Guys Who see and want my penis as it is are the most effective cage i have experienced. i find the only time i am tempted to masturbate in order to climax is when i have not been receiving enough cock. The only "cock" i have is the one a Man uses with me. The only orgasm i want is the orgasm a Man has inside of me. When i am getting that, i don't need or want a separate one of my own, my sexual energy is focused on His Cock and Orgasm as the connection that we share and bonds us.

Beauty is great, but to me, lust and need are better. i'd much rather get bred by a Top Who lusts/needs to breed me than a good looking Top Who's just fucking yet another hole. For me? The greater the desire/need, the better the breeding. Looks are not top of the list for me.

For me a Tops desire to fuck me is half the fuck. If He wants to breed me vs just breed, that's perfect for me. i don't know if it's so much a "compliment" as it is perfect chemistry and symbiosis.

You've already gotten some great input... a few extra thoughts. While we associate a lot of our lust and need with cock and cum, i think there is a lot more to sex and the connection we need/want with sex. For instance, looks and the visual appeal is part of that "want," but, as most of us are aware, the desire for visual gratification can impede receiving cock and cum. Probably 90% of the thousands of "cock" i have received have been anonymous. When gay sex changed from cruising to online, i found the best way to hook was anonymous walk in. Guys seemed a lot more open to walking into a mostly darkened room and finding me naked and ass up on the bed waiting. i even made a point of emphasizing the anonymity of the arrangement, that i would not even see them because i would be face down. That denial of visual input, and the sense of seeing, ended up accentuating other senses... and also, my inner desire/need. i found out that part of a Mans "cock" that i crave is His lust/need connecting to my own. i could sense and connect to that more when i was not focused on who and what i was seeing. i ended up having some repeat FB's who i know i would never have been visually attracted to had i seen them. Just from feel, i know one of them was probably close to 300 pounds and had about a 3 inch cock. He could only fuck by straddling my legs and Him in a sitting position. Given the size of His cock, i was always amazed that He could get in and actually fuck, but i'm pretty slender and i have more of a boys ass than one of those beautiful bubbles, so there's not a lotta ass crack impeding penetration lol. He was all Top though and His need/desire to fuck and breed me always came through loud and clear... and He always left a huge load. Had i let visual rule, i would have missed that wonderful connection with Him, and He with me. Turns out that 'beauty' is way "more than skin deep," and sometimes we need to be blind to see it.

It made sense to me too. Despite the bravado that sometimes surrounds a D/s or Top/bottom dynamic, my feel is both sides are fed by the pleasure the other derives from them. i don't think there's always a conscious awareness of that, but i think part of psychosexual drive is the need we all have to be loved, wanted, desired. When someone is getting obvious pleasure from fucking or getting fucked, for example, it's not hard to feel they are getting pleasure from who and how we are, not just the act of fucking. i think it's why opposites naturally attract. To me, the best sex is symbiotic.

Oh wow... i've been on squirt 20 plus years? never noticed... it was a great resource for cruise site locations originally before it morphed into an online cruise site

Squirt has a discussion forum? i've been on Squirt for a long time, but never noticed a discussion forum? All i know about is the chat feature, which most hook up sites have? i've actually had lots of hook up success on Squirt, especially since the demise of CL (RIP). And YES, i too have been bemused by guys looking for serious relationship on obvious hook up sites. or worse, have a morally superior air about them, as though hooking up is beneath them (only if they're Top, eh?). i get seriously frustrated on the sites intended for dating... especially when guys hooking up get offended by someone looking for a date or relationship. i know i can't be the only guy out there who'd like to have a relationship or more than a text exchange, but i have a hard time finding guys who do.

BZ is the only community i know of where gay guys, or guys who love guys, have full length, transparent conversation... about anything and everything. Most gay sites are for hook up only. Even sites where the designer is apparently trying for a dating or conversation type format, turns into a hook up site. i'm on one site in particular that is such a place, sort of a gay version of Match.com, with over 125k members. There's room for lengthy, detailed profiles, but i'd estimate fewer than 1/3 of the members take the time to write (or read) a profile. There's also a place for pics and vids, and most guys only look at those. Gives the impression that the gay community is made up of kindergarteners who cannot read and only look at pictures? It's almost comical how many guys grouse or resist taking 5 minutes to read about or attempt to get to know a person, but will spend hours looking at cock pics disconnected from any semblance of humanity. One commonly reads a "profile" that says: "no endless chat or emails," (which i read as: "i have no interest in communication"). i don't find many (read "any") gay communities where it's okay to write more that a five word sentence, where i'm not part of a minority of guys talking openly about life. Many gay sites have chat rooms where one can be swept into a stream of endless, mindless blather. Or, again, soley a hook-up format. Here? Guys can come here during refractory and write about the fuck they just had. i know of no other place where we can do that.

me too!!. i only wanna wear one if it's connected to a Top Who wants me caged. i feel cages are both physical and psychological . i've read of guys who were "caged" by tying a pink bow around their penis, the idea being that the "cage" is in the head. Cages that contain the penis, sort of on display behind bars are a type, and the type you describe physically internalizes the penis. The latter is more fitting for my psychological wiring. i do not perceive myself as having a "cock." To me, a Mans Cock is a penetrative organ He uses to penetrate, fuck, inseminate, dominate, impregnate, possess, etc., with. i don't have one of those. When the body is developing in the womb, we all start out as female, then hormones cause the ovaries to descend and become testicles in the case of a male. i see myself as something in between, so internalizing the penis with a micro has a dual effect for me, physical and psychological. i love a dynamic where my Top sees and wants me that way, it's very affirming and intimate.

He has epilepsy got a deep brain stimulator.

marry me?

my sweet FB had brain surgery, He's been outa commission for awhile, but He made up for it today... i think He may have cum more than once, couldn't hold Him all in.