LetsPOZBreed

Level 4 when I hook up these days. Though, to refer to that level as being "safe" is a bit of a misnomer; there's def risk involved with anyone you have raw sex with. However, my mitigation practices is to avoid anyone with a status of "Don't Know" or "Not Sure" and anyone that gives off a weird vibe and appears reckless with his own sexual health. I accept that STI's are part of the game, and I've been proverbially stung by some in the past - but it has been a number of years since that's happened, and the previous statement is one reason behind that.

As mentioned by others above, the man attached to the big dick has a major impact on whether or not I allow him to impact me (so to speak). As far as sexual specifics go, trying to go in me sans lube is a big no-no (to guys of any size, but especially the well hung ones). If he approaches my hole wrong, I tense up and it just isn't going to happen. Big pluses go to the hung men that know how to use their contours, curvature, and length/girth to really work me over. If he starts off gentle and really opens me up, then I'm perfectly fine letting him get a little more intense as things go along. To me, size alone is no reason to refuse a guy, as I've taken one as big at 10" once. It's all about how he approaches me that makes all the difference.

I've had overcomplicated situations before apps were even a thing. I don't think this is something new; however, I do feel that it's gotten worse over time. I've come to assume that any guy chatting with me with the idea of hooking up "tonight" is mid-wank. The more detailed he gets with what we're allegedly going to do with one another, the closer I assume he's getting to busting his wad. These days, I refrain from over-scripting an encounter on the apps. Sure, we can negotiate any role playing, but I prefer that negotiation to happen face-to-face before we start playing. That being said, I'm not going to have a guy negotiate a role-play scene with me for more than just a couple minutes.

If you've seen the size of Greek men's cocks, this isn't necessarily a bad limitation to have 😄 But by and large, I'm with @ErosWired here. It's a symbol that would have to catch on for it to be truly worthwhile in the broadest sense. With the plethora of emoji's out there for various things, adding one more might just add to confusion and make some profiles that already use these even more overkill.

If attendees negotiate this directly amonst themselves, that's totally fine. I'm speaking about situations where that didn't happen (for whatever reason) and one person decides to try and go through the host. If there's not an agreement ahead of time, just err on the side of caution and not divulge.

This cannot be understated. I had a mate in the US who hosted his parties about once a month (an ideal frequency, if you ask me - I think weekly is too frequent). Each month would feature a designated cum-dump - one guy in particular proved really popular; wasn't me, but man did I pump gallons inside him. Only rarely would his parties be what he'd call a "free for all" in which there wasn't a specified bottom for the evening. Sure, some peripheral bottoming might happen when guys were waiting their turn; however, this was more along the lines of "fluffing" like they'd do in porn. The cum-dump-du-jour would be getting all the loads like the rules of the party stated. Just like you'd need a mate or two to be your eyes and ears for purposes of making sure there's no theft or craziness, these same mates can help out if some unscrupulous bottoms start hogging the attention away from a designated cum dump. End of the day, it's your party - cump dumps aren't going to trust you if their night is a bust because all the tops are allowed to bust their nuts in someone else. That being said, being a regular party host does requrie building up a good repuatation as a host. You will become the face of these events, and guys want to feel safe and relaxed at your events - otherwise, you're finished. Most of this is covered above about specific behaviours on the nights themselves. A few others I might add to ensure that your frequent events continue to be successful: - seriously, once a guy gets naked, make sure you (or your mates) get a good look at what's being presented. Don't be afraid to put a stop to a guy with any obvious, visible signs of STI infection or some other condition that might put others at risk. Sure, there's always risk of contracting stuff when barebacking is involved - but there's a big difference between a risk of something happening and a certainty. - make sure your designated cumdumps are really knowing what they're getting into and are prepared for what will happen (i.e. not showing up in front of 20 guys but too tight to take them). Also, making sure your bottom(s) are cleaned out and are reasonably not going to have any unfortunate accidents during the party. - If your cum dump is a novice, have a trusted vers buddy there as a back up. This way, if guy #1 doesn't work out, you have someone else there willing to step in and take it for the (literal) team. - anonymity is key. You'll likely get men who go to these parties for the fun of it, yet they have no interest in being identified on the outside. If you see your attendees outside of the party, I wouldn't bring it up unless you know them well enough to know that it's okay to discuss such things. - Along the same lines, if anyone from the party asks you about anyone else at the party ("hey, can you put me in contact with that hot guy with a scorpion tattoo - I want to play with him again"). Don't be tempted to give that info out. Just like the anonymity bit above, it's not your place to be matchmaker. - if there's any fetish play that's allowed to go on during the party, make sure the guys attending know this in advance. For example, if you intend to allow fisting to happen - say that to everyone who is invited. This way, if any prospective attendees are put off by that, they can politely give it a miss.

Sheer curiosity. I remember when a guy let me give him my first blowjob. Totally inexperienced and just going off of what it looked like in the porn that I'd watched. There was some gentle guiding, yes; I wouldn't say I gave him awesome head. He did take a while to cum, and at some point I did wonder what would happen if he needed to shoot while my mouth was on it. So, I asked...he said, "I can cum in your mouth if you want me to". Pretty much from that second, I knew I wanted to taste it. Took a while longer before it happened, but the moment did arrive. Remember the taste being a bit odd, but somewhat appealing. For a while, I loved blowing a guy much more than actually getting fucked. When I started regularly getting barebacked is when my swallowing frequency really dropped off, though. It happens once in a blue moon these days, but love when I get to do it. Really depends on where/how I meet the guy and what we end up doing. In the cases were I end up on top, I love when my bottom lets me blow him after I've bred him and finish him off. Nothing really beats that mutually spent feeling when you're lying next to each other catching your breath.

My bathhouse initiation was Club New Orleans back in the day. It was never the same after Katrina, though...the upper two floors withstood a ton of damage, and the year after for Decadence, the a/c wasn't working that high up meaning it was unbearably hot in the big cruisy area. They eventually did renovate it, but closed for good a few years later. Pretty sad, really; although, the busiest times were always during the big events in the city (i.e. Mardi Gras, N.O. Pride, and Decadence). When I lived in Dallas, I much preferred Midtown Spa over Club Dallas. I understand Midtown has sadly gone as well. Here in London, I never went to Chariots prior to its closing (despite literally living on the other side of the Thames from it). Pleasuredrome is meh...it was a bit so-so the few times I've been inside. If I had to take my pick, I'd go to Locker Room in Kennington....skews older crowd-wise, but it means those of us there are fully aware of the bathhouse "culture", and it's a bit more laid back than the other cruisy spots.

I love when old threads are resurrected. Interesting to see how the comments have shifted over time with new members joining, others falling away, etc. Honestly, I don't ascribe to these "top" rules; even when I'm actually doing the topping. I think any successful sexual encounter is about a mutual level of respect for the guy(s) involved. If I'm topping, yeah...I want to be in the drivers seat for the session. Not that I'm going to order you around or anything (unless that's agreed on beforehand). But the idea is that you're letting me give you that kind of pleasure. Yes, I want to play with your hole, rim your hole, and finger it (within reason). That, however, is just to get warmed up to the actual event. And based on my countless experience as a bottom, I tend to fuck guys the way I like to BE fucked by guys. So, yeah...I'm going to insert and let you guide me in however you feel comfortable. And I'm going to work through at different paces, intensity, positions, etc. All while paying attention to the feedback you're giving me. If I'm fucking you, it's about YOU; I get off getting you off, if you will. Consequently, as a bottom, I take the time to prepare for a session. Nothing chaps my ass more than getting all that work done only to be disappointed by what happens (or even IF it happens). So, yeah. I'm going to clean my flat before you come over. I'm going to have the lube out in a place that's easily visible for you to grab and use. I'm going to have a towel nearby just in case. And I insist on eye contact during a session. I want you to see how much I'm enjoying you fucking me...and give you those unspoken words to give you direction on where to go - more, faster, slower, hard, rough, intimate, etc. This is the same behaviours that I enjoy from guys who bottom for me. My only rules nowdays are to be respectful, don't break limits, don't take it too seriously, and just have fun. We can even make each other laugh for a bit, then get right back into the intensity.

I didn't use them at all for a while. Got into them more when I was a regular sauna attendee, but have recently gone off my dependence on them when bottoming. I know it's fairly prevalent with the bottoms at the saunas here - even tops carry them (which knowing how that can affect an erection is kinda disappointing). Honestly, it's all down to personal tastes. If you don't want to use them - don't. No one is going to judge you for it.

As a roleplay scenario, this is pretty fucking hot. But I would never do it outside of that context. I will say that I've started to stick to this concept of "one squirt, all squirts". Basically, a bottom has up until the moment I start shooting to say no (and I'm upfront about that before a session starts so we're both aligned). But once that first shot goes in, it's too late. If you've taken that first squirt (usually the 1st or 2nd most voluminous of them all), then you've already gotten a good portion of the load already...might as well go all the way.

I love this post. Thanks to the OP @Philip for starting this thread. I came of gay-age in the mid 1990's. HIV and AIDS were still the big elephant in the room regarding gay sex and dating. There were fishbowls full of condoms at the gay bars, and they got properly used. It was incredibly common to ask your sexual partner if they had any protection ahead of anything starting - and I remember walking away when there was an answer of "no". Too many gay men knew too many others that succumbed to the disease, so the barebacking scene was underground and/or unspoken. That prob started to change about 5 years in. It started to become easier to find "recent" bareback porn videos to watch. I always wondered what it would be like, but never really wanted to take the risk. Sure, I had a couple early instances of getting fucked raw (one really good experience, and one really NOT good one). Just didn't feel like taking that risk as there was still a huge stigma around poz guys. I didn't really start barebacking regularly until I was nearly done with college around 2005. It was with a regular fuckbuddy that used condoms previously - we didn't have one on a particular night and figured we'd just go for it. Never looked back when playing with each other. There was a risk, sure; we weren't exculusively playing with one another and had other playmates. While I might have played wrapped with my others, I didn't really ask about his practices. So, yeah...there was a risk, but thankfully nothing ended up happening. When I first started barebacking full-time, I wasn't really being all that slutty. At least not until I started attending regular bareback parties at this one guy's house. There was a small stable of us "regulars" there with the occasional newbie. Never really caught anything from them either; most guys there were UD or neg and would test regularly. Still a risk, yeah, but we mitigated it as much as possible. I didn't get super reckless until I started drug use. And sure enough, that's when things went off the rails. I was being so indiscriminate about it that it was kinda crazy. Wasn't really "chasing", but not really asking either (nor would I have probably cared either way). Some months afterwards, I wound up with a case of syphillis and converted over to being poz. Not the best experience, really...really bad night sweats, complete loss of appetite, etc. I'm lucky in that was all I'd managed to contract, though. These days, despite my profile name on here, I try and be really careful about playing bareback. A big part of that is just because my views on sex have changed the last couple years (I made a separate long post about this some months back); but also, I'm not really interested in taking chances with another guy that appears to be reckless about his own status - namely, the guys on the apps who have "not sure" or "don't care" in that box. I have played, and yes there's still further risks involved, but I've managed to avoid any other nasty bugs over the years as a result. If the last few years of COVID and MPX has made me realise anything, it's that I'm not willing to put my health in danger for an experience of potentially questionable quality that I'm going to regret.

I've had the listen over voice call before. Though, the guy didn't offer to pay me for it...(not that it would have made a difference; it was a "no" regardless). Don't get me wrong, if I happen across hearing natural sex sounds, I'd be really turned on. But part of that thrill is the fact that the couple is unaware that I've stumbled upon them in their natural fullest. The minute there's an agreement for me to "watch", it becomes a bit too much of play-to-the-camera type porn which just seems unrealistic.

So, I've heard of these cuddle events. I'll be honest, if I'm in the mood for just that, then I'd go. But if I'm at the saunas, this is the last thing I'm willing to settle on. This convo is going on at just the right time. I went to one of my local saunas last night - was relatively slower than usual, but I still got some action. Ended up having quite a good session with a guy; went on for a while. Figuring that things would have largely died down toward the end, I didn't think I'd get any other play for the night after we were finished. He asked me if I'd cum in his mouth - agreed to only on the provision that he kiss it back to me and that I'd be too tight for more fucking after that. He agreed...finished fucking and loading me, then we did the afterplay to get me to cum. Actually was a great finish to the night. Had the sex not been good, I'd have just tapped out at some stage; however, I felt the need to reward my top for a good fuck of the night. 🙂

As I've gotten older, I find guys aren't as good at this as they used to be (by and large). I absoltuely loved giving a guy this when I was younger (and still do, considering he's "prepared" for it); had a really good regular FB in uni that could eat ass for days and make me want to get fucked SO BAD. Not really sure what's behind this. Either they take it too literally, as the OP said - or they are a bit too scared of tasting "something". the ones that are barely on it and barely give a few licks thinking they've done something. Those guys make me feel a bit self-conscious; I do prepare myself for the occasion, and it gives me pause to think I might have missed something. I think it's just a mental block on their part, though.

I like afterplay too, but whether or not I want it depends on the vibe and place. Usually, afterplay is the kind of thing I reserve for at-home hookups; even still, you have to be a good fuck to make me want that. That being said, there's a biological explanation for the loss of sex drive immediately after ejaculation...called the refractory period. It's doesn't last forever, and depending on the guy, it might not last more than a few minutes. If it's a hookup that wasn't that great...this is when I peace out. If I'm really into the guy and he's a regular playmate, this period is the cuddle period. If I'm at a sex club/sauna, it's been known to happen where the guy and I will find a way to relax with each other for a few minutes afterwards. It's kinda nice for a little bit, but then you want to move on to the next opportunity.

Note to moderators - I wouldn't consider this hardcore, but happy to move this if needed. Over the last couple years, my interest in spanking play has gotten much more intense. I've only done very light stuff with it in the past; maybe the occasionall smack on the ass when getting fucked, and I did spank a (legal age) boy I played with a few years ago - but nothing too intense. However, I've been wanting to get into a proper adult spanking session. I've joined the Whappz app; had a couple introductory messages, so we'll see if anything pans out. I'm also planning to head to one of the spanking fetish nights here in London to check out the scene as well. I'm nervous about it, but one good session will get rid of that I'm sure. Question for those of you who have done it (more the receivers, but happy to hear from everyone): What was the experience like? I've read this quote regarding the moment your reactions change from "cries of anger" to "cries of repentence". That moment where your sounds indicate that you've fully given yourself over to your spanker. Also, any advice you can give a potential first timer (for a real proper session, not just the occasional bum whack)

Depression leading to barebacking? In hindsight, yes... I wouldn't go so far as to say it was proper bugchasing; although, I knew conversion was a real possibility. This was long before PrEP was a thing, so it was kind of inevitable. As to why it lead there? I'm sure I'd need a number of therapy sessions to uncover that. But the shortest guess I can take is this. It started out with a regular playmate where we ended up making the decision because neither one of us had a condom at that point; figured since we'd had sex countless times before - why not. And we never went back. By that stage, though, I also thought that if I even suggested going back to condom use that we'd stop playing. So, yeah, there was also a bit of a self-esteem issue at play. I did move cities a couple years later, and from that point onwards, I just knew that I wanted to just be an unashamed barebacker. Actually converting took longer than you might think. Happened about 4 years later. Likely cause here was that I'd been playing with guys who were either neg/UD up until a point, so there wasn't any real transmission. But once I started into some drug use, I became much more indiscriminate about looking for sex. My best guess of the guy who likely converted me were guys who were recently pozzed also and hadn't yet begun treatment. A part of me realises that I changed many things about my life after becoming poz (eating healthier and generally taking a bit more care of myself). In hindsight, though, I never really got past the depression that led me down this road. It's tough looking back on some of the past memories of the things I've done, just to get a little self-esteem and satisfaction. I still seek to address the root causes of my own depression and try to do something about it. I'm learning to no longer value my own self-worth by whether or not men wants to fuck and breed me. I've had far less sex in the last couple of years, but I'm actually okay with this. The more recent times I've been sexual have been amazing; I'm going into it with the right mindset each time, and it comes across during the session. Do I still bareback, though? Absolutely...but I'm also UD (and have been for close to 10 years), am very upfront about that with my partners, and am not into any situation where there's an intent to "poz" someone. Granted, that sounds a bit rich considering my profile name; however, that's only a roleplay scene I like to do with another consenting partner. I don't want it on my own conscience that I've pozzed a guy - however he may deal with it afterwards; that would likely only further any depressed feelings I have, knowing that I've intentionally inflicted this upon another being.

Gun to my head? I'd pick a small number of regular good dicks over a parade of mediocre ones any day here. I'm definitely in the minority here, but I actually enjoy finding those new things out about someone I've had great sex with before. Anon has it's moments, don't get me wrong. But if I had to pick ONLY one of the two options for the next year? Pals wins hands-down.

It depends on the vibe. During times where I'm the one fucking, I don't really say anything - just let the moans and grunts do the talking for me; and the pulsing cock of course. When I'm getting fucked, I'm fine with whatever the top is more comfortable doing, but there is a such thing as a top being TOO verbal about it. Once that line is crossed, the whole thing just becomes awkward.

I've come across the second type before; although, not really since my late teens in the late 90's I ddin't get it then, and don't get it now; the cum would be going in my mouth and in my insides. Any risk involved would overwhelmingly be taken by me in performing that act.

This, too. I assume anyone on BBRT and elsewhere that quotes his status as "not sure" or "don't know" is in this boat.

Also, I'm sure a certain subset of those "negative" responses might be poz in disguise. Not necessarily intentionally, of course, but I remember being warned in my younger days about the guys who are poz and don't yet know it - prob due to a recent infection. These were the more dangerous ones, as their VL wouldn't be tempered by meds yet. I'm 95% certain I got converted by this type of guy.

I'm nothing if not a statistic nut. Good question to pose, but my thoughts on the results that stand at the time of this writing (through 245 responses, with a "neg" % of 68.5)... First is consider the forum. This is BZ, so I'd say the sample size on here is going to be more skewed toward poz than the general MSM population at large. As for the numbers of men responding poz further back than 1990, I'm afraid it's been mentioned that many of those are either not on here posting about their general escapades (or lack thereof), or have sadly left us some time ago.

Definitely uncalled for. Even if he felt a certain kind of way, keep it to yourself, dude. Long before I got pozzed, my older best friend (who has been poz since the 80's) would constantly tell me horror stories of the kinds of private messages he'd get from guys on gay dot com back in the day. He would say the same thing about educating one's self on how trasmission truly worked and whatnot, but at some point in the argument, it's just a lost cause.