Spunkinmyarse
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Everything posted by Spunkinmyarse
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I would just stick at it. I can’t remember how many visits it took to a bathhouse before I felt comfortable enough to “let go”, but it was quite a few. @ffWholeis right: you’re just not quite ready yet. The more familiar you become with the surroundings and the whole concept of bathhouse sex, the sooner you’ll feel comfortable enough to join in. I’m crap at initiating contact, so going down the cumdump route worked best for me: I present myself and let guys come to me, rather than picking them myself. But it does take time to get to that particular place. Not sure if that’s where you want to be, but enjoy the journey, and don’t worry too much about the destination- you’ll get to wherever you’re going in your own good time!
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Yes, I agree with this entirely. I took a break from bottoming for many years, and remember getting the feeling you are describing when I started up again. It didn’t last long, and faded away entirely after a few good sessions. I also remember wanting to pee badly, but nothing would come out. Again, this sensation soon faded. Basically, you’re brain doesn’t quite know how to deal with this new sensation yet. In the past, whenever there has been something solid in your rectum, it has told your body to expel it, which is why you’re feeling the urge to take a shit. Eventually your brain will re-wire itself and learn the difference between an arse full of shit and an arse full of cock. Just keep persevering!
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What do you think about my strategy to reduce STIs/HIV?
Spunkinmyarse replied to tonio's topic in HIV Risk & Risk Reduction
Gonorrhea will be your biggest enemy- DoxyPEP is not very effective against it. But you’ll just have to deal with it as and when it appears- at least as a top, you’ll probably know when you’ve got it. But you should still get tested regularly. They say that peeing after sex helps, but I’m not sure if there is any evidence for that. -
I haven’t been to Northwich for a Cumunion event, but I’ve been a few times on a regular Sunday afternoon, and it’s great! It’s an amazing sauna, and although I wouldn’t specifically make the 500-mile round-trip drive from where I live in Essex for it, I do make the effort to stop in when I’m visiting family in the North.
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Bars/venues to go in Berlin to maximize number of loads?
Spunkinmyarse replied to rawfuckr's topic in German-Speaking Europe
I can only speak for Lab, Bull, Tom’s and Prinzknecht. You won’t have a problem getting into any of them. Deffo do the Lab on Thursday and Friday. The door is only open for 2 hours (21:00 till 23:00 on Thursday, 22:00 till 00.00 on Friday, I think)- get there early, ideally before the doors open, and be prepared to queue, especially on the Friday: to 2-4-1 nights are very popular). The Sunday afternoon session there is also pretty good. The other three are just regular bars with dark(ish) back rooms where guys fuck, and it’s unlikely you’ll have to queue for any of them. Best time for the Bull seems to be late, ie: after midnight. It’s the sleaziest of the three and definitely my favourite. Tom’s and Prinzknecht are similar- not sure what the best times are for those, though I imagine it’s probably the same as the Bull. New Action is a leather bar, and I’ve never felt suitably attired to enter. Not sure if you’re into saunas, but if you are, then the Boiler on Sunday afternoon is probably your best bet. Having said that, it’s the only place in Berlin where I’ve experienced any attitude: a lot of the guys who go are stunning, but they know it, and seem to spend most of their time posing for each other. Have fun! -
I think the apps work well for younger guys. The apps are so photo-oriented, which is great in your 20’s and 30’s, but post-40 not so much. Phone cameras have a nasty habit of picking out every wrinkle, every grey hair- they are no friend to those of us on the more ‘mature’ side. I‘m in my 50’s now, and still fit enough that I attract a reasonable amount of attention if I actually present myself “in real life” at a sauna or a cruise bar/club. But I’ve more or less given up on the apps. Apart from anything else, guys can set their filters to whatever age group they like, so I won’t even show up anymore on a lot of guys’ grids- I’m literally invisible. Sure, I can lie about my age to a certain extent so I can squeeze into the ‘maximum age = 50’ group. But even this becomes untenable at a certain point...
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Visiting London Over New Years, Looking for Loads
Spunkinmyarse replied to trel02's topic in London Metro Area
Also, make sure you check JamieHP’s website out (just Google it). They organize events/parties in London (SBN mentioned above is one of them), with different themes and in different venues. -
Yea, that sounds like Gran Canaria. Gran Canaria (GC) is how European gays often refer to the resort town of Maspalomas/Playa Del Ingles (PDI) which is in the south of Gran Canaria itself, one of the Canary Islands. Gran Canaria island is quite large, and actually has many other towns, including Las Palmas, the ninth largest city in Spain. Maspalomas and Playa Del Inges are two parts of the same resort town- nobody know where one starts and the other ends, and the terms are often used interchangeably. Now, I‘m not sure when you visited, and you can accuse GC of lacking many things, but nightlife is not one of them! It has a large and very active gay scene that supports dozens of bars and clubs that attract gay tourists for every corner of Europe all year round! I don’t know enough about the history of the place to know when this all started, but as far as I’m aware it’s been like that for some decades. It’s definitely one of Europe’s hottest gay hot-spots, up there with Berlin, Amsterdam, Barcelona/Sitges, etc- but what makes it unique is that it is the only one that can boast year-round sunshine and warm temperatures: hence its popularity. As for where to stay, the Yumbo shopping centre is at the heart of all things gay, so choose somewhere within walking distance of that (which frankly covers most of the resort). There are thousands and thousands of hotel rooms- that’s pretty much all Maspalomas is about.
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Although I won’t be in GC during April (Jan/Feb is my usual time to go), this is a good idea! Since my partner died, I have had to travel solo quite often, and although this does have some advantages, it is usually an expensive way to do it. Travelling with friends isn’t always possible- so an option like this would be great!
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Last time I was there (September) they were accepting cards for payment on the door, but you still needed to pay for your drinks at the end with cash. Generally, cash is king in Berlin- don’t expect to be able to pay with your card everywhere, particularly in the sleazier bars around Nollendordplatz.
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I quite like Christmas at home, and I love daffodils- so in an ideal world, I’d probably spend early Nov to early Dec in GC (taking in winter pride), and then all of Jan/Feb.
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Yes, if we want to retire to Spain or anywhere else in the EU we’re now bound by the same restrictions that apply to US citizens or any other non-EU citizens: no less, no more- a certain minimum retirement income and a sufficient level private health insurance cover. In this regard, Brexit has certainly been a huge inconvenience, but not one that should necessarily dictate a nation’s destiny, and I think it will be many years before we can truly say whether we were right of wrong to take the decision that we did in 2016. Personally, I favour @NLbear’s approach, and aim to take extended breaks in Gran Canaria over the winter months, while continuing to reside in the UK. Having spent many years living abroad, I have come to appreciate the benefits of roots: the UK is my home and remains the place I want to be in my old age- appealing though Gran Canaria is, I quickly tire of what it has to offer and could not see myself living there full time. As far as moving somewhere within the UK specifically for retitement, I don't see the point: it's small enough that you're never that far from where you want to be.
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I’m not sure Lisbon has the same kind of gay scene that some of the Spanish cities do- it’s not that great for cruise bars and that kind of thing. However, it’s very much ‘on trend’ right now, and it’s certainly a beautiful and very interesting city, which all sorts of other stuff going on!
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If Spain is an option for you, perhaps you should consider Malaga and the surrounding area. It’s a popular retirement destination for people from all over Europe, largely because of the great climate. Some of the 20th century development along the Costa del Sol has not been particularly ‘sympathetic’, but there are still some lovely areas and Malaga itself is a great city. Plus, it’s only a 20 minute train ride from Torremolinos, which is one of Spain’s gay hotspots, full of bars, clubs and beautiful men!
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Yes, this often happens to me. I tend to go through periods where I binge on sex, often on some kind of trip or sexcation, where I can devote myself 100 percent to the task in hand. But afterwards I usually lose all interest for a while, and take that opportunity to get tested, treated and all that crap. I actually quite enjoy my breaks from sex: they allow me to get on with other things in life, and re-connect with myself in different ways. But slowly and surely, the urge to play comes back just as strong as before, and I begin the cycle all over again.
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Which is better for loads, London or Amsterdam?
Spunkinmyarse replied to Cumdumpintraining's topic in London Metro Area
One of the reasons could simply be that you have more options when it comes to cruise bars in Amsterdam, and a much smaller population. Although London has a number of regular events/parties at locations dotted about the city, it only has two real cruise bars (or maybe if you include the Underground club), and a population of 9 million. Therefore it’s not surprising that there’s a queue outside the Vault on Thursday night. I don’t know Amsterdam, but it sounds like you have a lot more choices, and a population of less than 1 million. It may be that the crowd is spread just too thin. Too many options isn’t always a good thing: sometimes I think that even Gran Canaria outside peak times has too many bars- there may only be 10-20 guys in each one, whereas if there were fewer bars, guys would be forced to bunch together, and the bars that remained would be packed. -
There are parties/events worldwide dedicated to just this: check out Fickstutenmarkt in Berlin and other German cities, also known as ‘Horsefair’ in London and other English-speaking countries.
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Visiting the Capital on 27-29 and need some focus!
Spunkinmyarse replied to musclerub101's topic in London Metro Area
I’m more familiar with Thursdays, but I imagine Mondays are similar. It opens at 1:00pm, but the afternoon is always a regular ‘cruise’ session (ie: clothed). Guys start stripping at around 6:00/6:30pm, and by 7:00pm you must be naked. It’s usually pretty busy by then peaking between 8:00 and 10:00, after which it starts to get quieter (it is a school night, after all). Yeah, I believe Sweatbox re-opens this Saturday. Don’t forget, you can always get free re-entry to the Vault: just make sure they give you a stamp on your way out. -
Visiting the Capital on 27-29 and need some focus!
Spunkinmyarse replied to musclerub101's topic in London Metro Area
It won’t be packed out on a Monday, but that can be a good thing- on Thursday nights it’s so busy there’s barely room to move around. Mondays are quieter, but there should still be a reasonable number of guys. Total mix of men, all ages, shapes and sizes. Most aged probably between 30 and 45, with a few younger and some older. The best thing about naked night is that guys are usually up for it, but there’s no pressure to play if you just want to watch on your first time. -
Visiting the Capital on 27-29 and need some focus!
Spunkinmyarse replied to musclerub101's topic in London Metro Area
Yes- as long as you’re comfortable stripping off, you should definitely put the Vault on your list for Monday night. And if you’d rather stay clothed, you should put it on your list for Tuesday night- though it won’t be as busy or as much fun… -
I just got back, unfortunately- and will post a full ‘report’ at some point… but in the mean time, I would advise you not to miss Sunday afternoon at the sauna! Depending on where you are staying, it’s a little bit out of the way, but definitely worth the 30-minute walk from the centre of town!
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I get a similar reaction from guys in clubs when I turn down a top because he starts unwrapping a condom. I’m always pretty nice about it and just say it’s not going to work for me, and although some guys accept that with grace, others get distinctly pissy and walk off in a huff, and then go on to make a point of deliberately ignoring me the rest of the night. The assumption seems to be that I should be the one who makes the compromise, presumably because fucking bare is perceived as the “riskier” option. Something along the lines of, “Well, you fuck raw, so of course you’ll take it with a condom, right?”. Wrong.
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Why is the queue for this party so horrendous? I was at the PIG party during Folsom where they managed to get thousands of guys through the door with very little queueing at all- a great example of German efficiency! I don’t understand why Snax can’t do the same… Is it the idea that, “Oh, it’s really hard to get in- therefore it must be really good!”? Tbh, it puts me off ever going- I don’t care how good a party is, I’m not queueing for 3 to 5 hours, potentially in the rain, and risking being turned away at the door because the doorman doesn’t like the shoes I’m wearing!
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Yep- totally agree. That’s why we exist- it’s what we are for!
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I often like to think that there are just enough of us to go round. If we lived in a society where all men were open to their sexual urges and not subject to societal pressure to repress them, then there would be just enough cocksuckers/cumdumps to satisfy their carnal lusts- a natural balance in the order of things. As it is, only a small percentage of men truly embrace their sexual selves, so it often seems like there’s a surplus of cocksuckers/cumdumps all competing for a limited pool of cock. Oh, if only men would truly open up- we’d be in such demand!
