Does a white man belong in a sex club geared towards men of color?

[TigerMilner]

I had an experience like no other last weekend. And while it was incredible, it also had moments that were awkward. I went to a sex club called "The Den" in Atlanta. I arrived about 12:30 and the place had a hot crowd. The man at the door recognized me as I had written to them before hand asking if it was only for men of color. They reserve the right to turn you away. They did not. In fact, the two men were very nice and welcoming to me. It was "Butt Naked" night, so I was really excited. Shoes was the only thing you were allowed to wear. Everything else went in your locker. I do love men of color, any color. I noticed immediately that I was the minority. In fact, I was the only white man there. I was very sensitive to the fact that I could be perceived as using them for my "Black dude" fantasy. So I stayed very humble and submissive. In fact, I noticed at one point that I was keeping my eyes lowered, as if not worthy of eye contact. I was there to worship black cock and be used as the white whore by as many as wanted it.

I checked out the club and the men. About half treated me as if I was invisible, as if I had no business there. (Bottoms I'm sure, though all the men there were masculine and hot). It was an amazing collection of dark skin bulls. A few were latino, but dark. I offered myself up by positioning myself on all fours on a bed. Only one man fucked me. It was hot, but when he was done, that was it. I tried the fuck bench, a large ottoman, a small bed in a semi-private room, and then I discovered the "Dark Room". It was so dark no one could tell who was doing what to whom. I figured this was my best bet since most of the men didn't want to be seen fucking the white man. I got nailed a few times in the dark right away. But even in the dark room, some of the men turned away from me as soon as they felt my hair.

I stayed til 6 am and got my ass torn up completely, especially after 3:00 am. It was amazing. But I still wonder, was I out of place or out of line in going there since it is billed as a club for Men of Color? Does anyone have an opinion or insight into this? I'm not the least bit racist, but I do understand that it is out there and that there are politics involved as well. Would you do it?

Edited December 12, 2013 by TigerMilner

[jcklvrga]

I live in atlanta and have read several reviews / comments about this place. I am a white guy for reference here. I think its crazy that in this day that such a club exists, but it is a private club so I respect that from a legal point of view. Still I would personally stay the hell away from a place that does not welcome me.

All that said Atlanta has several other places where black and white men and all colors mix naturally and easily .. like the local bath house flex. I personally have played with many hot sexy friendly black men there. In fact for some reason that I have never yet figured out i seem to attract black men easily ... not complaining , its a good thing.

[DarkroomTaker]

here in the Uk seems easier, sauna that I visits have a multicultural setting, on occasion I may be the only white guy and never have a problem, I seem to attract Asian/Pakistani men and most black guys take their turns, maybe the UK is more relaxed? whatever; I get it where its offered and its their loss TM you are so Fuckable

[Titus]

I think you did the right thing by writing to ask them first, so I don't think you were wrong for having checked it out. But based on your account of that night, it sounds like while the staff and/or management might have been cool with you being there, their clientele might not have felt as comfortable with your presence. If it were me, I probably wouldn't return to The Den just out of respect for the club's regulars, who seem to have certain expectations about who they will and won't encounter when they're there. Maybe I'd consider it if I had one or two buddies who were men of color, and they wanted me to go with them, but I don't think I'd return on my own. Especially (as jcklvrga says) if there are other clubs in Atlanta that typically attract a more mixed crowd.

[atlfukbud]

ATL guy here, too -- would luv to go to the Den! I've heard that if you come with or have a black man escort you around that you get more attention and less "tude" -- in essence, he whores out out to other black men...anyone want to escort me and test this out? :-)

[wood]

  TigerMilner said:

I stayed til 6 am and got my ass torn up completely, especially after 3:00 am. It was amazing. But I still wonder, was I out of place or out of line in going there since it is billed as a club for Men of Color? Does anyone have an opinion or insight into this? I'm not the least bit racist, but I do understand that it is out there and that there are politics involved as well. Would you do it?

Nah, its just what you make out of it. Of course if its geared primarily towards black men who are attracted to black men, you probably wont get much attention, but going there is no issue.

I primarily date black men, and a majority of my friends are black. I have been in many situations where I am the only white guy. If You make it awkward it will be, if you don't it wont be, simple as that. Even when I had been in situations where the people in the room have almost no white friends and rarely see people that are not black, I make it work, and most people end up liking me. Don't act like a douche, be nice, and relax, and you will probably have a great time.

Also when I'm in Atlanta next time I need to check this place out, lol

Edited December 12, 2013 by wood

[Bttm2go]

You were invited so you had a right to be there. However, for the guys who only wanted to play with men of color, they had their right too. Dark room was a good idea. As for the hair issue, you can always show up bald! I also like the idea of another man of color whoring me out.

[TigerMilner]

Just to clarify, I got more action than I could handle that night. I think I handled it very well, I just wanted to make sure I wasn't breaking some unwritten code. I will definitely go back. I love the idea of going with a man who is a regular and getting whored out. I can totally get into that. I saw a little of that in that after this one guy fucked me, three or four others would step in and go next. He fucked me three times and his fucks lasted for what seemed like an hour. Each time he handed me off and two or three men would fuck me after him. It was awesome.

I have to say, the men there turned me on. At one point one of the managers tracked me down. It freaked me out. Then he told me I need to come to front desk. I had dropped my wallet in the locker room when undressing and someone turned it in. With everything inside.

My ass is still sore. And it's Thursday. lol.

[Cheshire_Cub]

Love men of colour too, sounds a fab idea to be escorted there and then whored out !!!

[Fickloch]

Yes you were. They advertise themselves as being for black men. Whats the point in go there? especially since there are so many alternatives. Seems pretty simple to me.

[bbzh]

First of all, to the original poster, I'm very impressed that you called ahead and asked instead of just showing up at the door. That's classy. And probably guaranteed your admission. I just had a look at their website and they don't say you HAVE to be of color but it's clearly who they cater to.

As a black man, I totally get why these clubs feel they need to exist. Too often, men of color go places where they feel unwelcome.

I'll be honest though. When I first started reading your post, I thought, hmmm that's a typical white male attitude - i.e. one of entitlement. But as I continued reading, I began to admire your courage for even going. If I saw that a club was marketing itself to a demographic that I was not part of, I probably wouldn't waste my time. I guess I'm a big believer of "get in where you fit in". There's enough choice out here that I don't have to waste my energy on being upset about not being accepted or welcomed at one place.

This is why I like the leather scene. It's just more welcoming. But I have to admit that I do give the side-eye to guys who turn up at leather bars without a stitch of leather on. And as the original poster pointed out, if you turn up at a venue that markets to men of color, you are going to be ignored by some because they came there looking for, well, men of color. Duh!

But I am intrigued by one of your observations that I have certainly experienced - i.e. white guys who are not willing to have sex with me out in the open where perhaps other white guys can see, but who are more than willing to fuck me when we are away from prying eyes. And this is not a shyness thing. I am a regular at sex parties where I experience this.

By the way, before a bunch of you all start booking flights to Atlanta, I do have a hunch that this club in Atlanta is not going to allow itself to be fully "integrated", so that's worth keeping in mind before you get your hopes up too high.

[toad2]

It cums down to this if you want this and do it who is going to tell you different what you want is want you get

[Pigmansex]

  DarkroomTaker said:

here in the Uk seems easier, sauna that I visits have a multicultural setting, on occasion I may be the only white guy and never have a problem, I seem to attract Asian/Pakistani men and most black guys take their turns, maybe the UK is more relaxed? whatever; I get it where its offered and its their loss TM you are so Fuckable

That sounds hot. Which clubs do you go to in the UK?

[TigerMilner]

  bbzh said:

First of all, to the original poster, I'm very impressed that you called ahead and asked instead of just showing up at the door. That's classy. And probably guaranteed your admission. I just had a look at their website and they don't say you HAVE to be of color but it's clearly who they cater to.

As a black man, I totally get why these clubs feel they need to exist. Too often, men of color go places where they feel unwelcome.

I'll be honest though. When I first started reading your post, I thought, hmmm that's a typical white male attitude - i.e. one of entitlement. But as I continued reading, I began to admire your courage for even going. If I saw that a club was marketing itself to a demographic that I was not part of, I probably wouldn't waste my time. I guess I'm a big believer of "get in where you fit in". There's enough choice out here that I don't have to waste my energy on being upset about not being accepted or welcomed at one place.

By the way, before a bunch of you all start booking flights to Atlanta, I do have a hunch that this club in Atlanta is not going to allow itself to be fully "integrated", so that's worth keeping in mind before you get your hopes up too high.

Thanks for the comment. I was hoping to hear from some men of color as well. I knew you would know what I mean. Your point about " a typical white male attitude" was exactly what I was hoping to avoid. I guess I did. I get why they feel a need to exist, and judging by the crowd, so do a lot of other men. And driving unwanted traffic of middle aged white men is something I hope does not result from this post. Integrating this place would ruin it. I am really turned on by the idea that was suggested about going there with a member who would whore me out. That is hot. Next time I go, it will be like that. Or at least I'll go there to meet some guys I'll hook up with thru bbrt or a4a. They do advertise so they have to be used to this scenario. There was no criticism or judgement intended in my post. I truly want to know how other white bottoms handle this situation. Personally I like hot men. Period. I just find dark skin to be very hot. And being a fair skinned blue eyed white boy all my life, I guess I find the contrast to be exciting. I just think it looks good.

I would recommend the The Den highly, but you better be secure in your role as a submissive bottom, and you better be self confident enough inside to withstand being treated like you don't exist by some. The man who answered my inquiry said that it was "all about your attitude". He was spot on correct.

I did not go there looking for my black man fix. I went there to give those amazing men what they needed that night. A warm wet hole to breed. The fact that I am white, is beside the point. But I have to say they were a much finer lot than any I have ever found at a typical bath house full of "diversity". There was not one man there that I did not want. That is never the case at a typical club.

I have to admit, from a writer's standpoint, experiencing being the minority for the first time was eye opening.

[TigerMilner]

I guess I am more adventurous than most people when it comes to sex. I don't mind taking risks and putting myself out there. Life is too short to spend it wondering what it would be like. But if I was out of place or offended anyone at all, I do, and will apologize.

  Fickloch said:

Yes you were. They advertise themselves as being for black men. Whats the point in go there? especially since there are so many alternatives. Seems pretty simple to me.