Neg Straight Guy Looking For First Poz Load

[Promiseyoullpullou]

A little bit about me...

I'm 39, white, 6'5, athletic, and consider myself straight. Except when I've found myself wrapped in the body of a naked man. Or men... I don't know my status. I've barebacked with maybe 200 girls and most of the guys I've either fucked or been fucked by. I know that I have had bareback sex with at least a dozen poz guys. I've topped some, loaded them. I've been topped by several. None of them came inside me, to the best of my knowledge. Some I stopped before they came because I chickened out. Some didn't like when they found out I was neg (probably) and they stopped. I have had at least 3 poz guys cum in my mouth, stomach, eyes. I've had a lot of bareback sex in bathhouses and spas. I know at least 2 guys have cum inside me. Neither of which I know their status. 

I've waged that internal battle with my straight pussy loving side, and my darker bareback poz cum craving faggot side. I tell myself that because I haven't been fucked or fucked a man in 5 years, I must have outgrown that phase... Though I did suck two cocks in that time... What is true though, is I spend A LOT of time on A4A, BBRT, and this site. There is nothing more I love than reading pozzing stories, or chatting with poz tops. So there is my conundrum. I'm not gay, but like an addiction, I rave and desire letting myself go and taking poz loads in my ass. 

I live in New York City, in Greenwich Village. I've been here almost 5 years. The last time I was fucked, was 5 years ago in another state. That last guy had told me he was neg. I swallowed his load that night. He may or may not have cum or leaked cum in my ass when he fucked me. A couple weeks after him, I had a nasty flu. Sick as a dog. Then I recovered. Sometime after that, I received an email from him. he told me he was actually poz, and that I was probably poz too. So maybe I'm poz, maybe I'm not. 

But for 5 years, I haven't allowed myself again to give into my desire and get fucked. I did try twice, hooking up with guys, who couldn't get hard. B-O-R-I-N-G. I'm ready to do it and then it doesn't happen.

In the 5 years, I've bareback fucked a dozen girls. Some I've known forever, some I met that night. One was a girlfriend for a year and a half, and another was even a married woman... But no guys. But it hasn't strayed from my mind. All I think about at night and sometimes during the day is getting fucked by a poz top. I want to feel his cock pulse and throb as he breeds me with his toxic seed. And once I do it once, fuck it, I know I'll do it all the time. Maybe that's what has kept me from doing it. I know what I'll become. A poz cum loving pig. And it's almost guaranteed if I'm not poz already, I will be then. But I can't stop the desire and cravings.

So fuck it...

Here's my idea. I want to find an HIV POZ bareback top, who wants to give me his bug. I want you to want to do it. I want you to tell me you are giving it to me. I want you to make me tell you I want it. I don't need crazy dark rituals, or pain, just a POZ top who will get off as much as I do that he is the one to give me my first load of charged, hiv, hot, bugged, poz, diseased, dirty cum. I can't change the way I feel, so fuck it, I might as well enjoy it. I know the risks. I have made a decision. Will it change my life? Yes. Maybe for the bad, maybe for the good. But certainly it will be fun and freeing. It will also be terrifying and exciting. Everything I've been looking for. 

So are there any POZ TOPS in NYC who would want to be the one? Any Poz Tops who will be visiting NYC soon? Any Poz Tops who will enjoy gifting me with their bug?

I am 100 percent serious. Let's make this happen.

My ideal situation is I show up at your place. You're already naked. I promise to waste no time getting naked myself. I will worship your cock with my mouth. I love sucking cock. We can kiss, or we don't have to if you don't want to. You can use lube on me, your spit, or you can dry fuck me. Talk dirty to me when you are fucking me. Tell me how you're going to give me your poz cum. How you are going to make me yours. Change me forever. Fuck me slow if you want. Fuck me fast. Hard or soft. And as you get closer to cumming in this straight guy who hasn't been fucked in 5 years, pull me closer and infect me with your hiv dna. When you cum, I'm sure my heart will skip a beat, and a fear and excitement will shoot through me. But as I said, once it happens the first time. If we can get you hard again, give me my 2nd poz load. Or third. Then maybe we'll call one of your friends. I just want my first time to be one on one with a guy who knows my name and knows he is pozzing me. and is happy to do it.

Contact me through here or email me: promiseyoullpullout@gmx.com

Fuck it.

Let's do it.

I'm Will.

[Jackfoster]

Woah man this is some intense shit and its fucking hot. I understand how you feel, its how i felt a few years ago when i got pozzed up. after i took my first load there was no stopping me and i went full throttle whore whenever and with whoever i could. Have fun, i hope you find what you're looking for and have considered all avenues (prep) etc. Its more of a mindfuck later when you look back at yourself and you're like "god damn, that was me?! I did all that crazy destructive shit!" and you get off on it and its fucking hot, but it affects you in ways you can't even imagine. Self identity, relationships and all that. But still undeniably some of the craziest fucks ive ever had were chasing and post conversion. Insane. Good luck, gods speed and above all else stay true to yourself 

[Rastafoo]

Damn I wish I lived nearby!