Flakes, no shows

[Guygonebad]

Agree, my show rate when I host a cum dump party is 30%.  I agree with charged up, tops have lots of options, but simple curtesy would be nice!   I need to go to Texas!!!

[barejackbro3]

I live in a city (Leeds, UK) that is kinda notorious for flakes, no-shows, cancel-at-the-last-minute (with a shit excuse) or go silent a few hours before we arranged to meet. So I can get pretty ruthless at times - if its a grindr quickie and they started to back out i give them 10 minutes to man up - and I tell them this. I never block a flake - if he contacted me, he must've thought I was hot and fuckable. Not blocking him means he still sees me on his grids (grindr, bbrt etc) but i will never reply again. Sometimes I even send him naked pics to wordlessly suggest: here's what you missed

Recently one guy who wanted to fuck me and load my ass in his deserted office backed out at the last minute. Then, hang on maybe I can. I said right, you got 10 mins or i'm done. 20 minutes passed and suddenly he's back. My reply: Time's up - C ya. I landed another random fuck off grindr less than half an hour later. I was in his area again today, and guess who messaged. Still wants me, it seems, but cancel-at-last-minute flakes only get one chance.

For me, integrity is important, in every part of life, including this one. If you contact me in advance saying you can't make it, sorry etc, it's fine with me. Cancel at the last minute and you never hear from me again, and I have a near eidetic memory for this kinda thing.

Edited January 21, 2019 by barejackbro3

[barejackbro3]

Worst thing I ever did to a last minute flake (and yeah I do feel a bit bad about it now)

There was a bi guy in London when I was visiting, wanted to fuck me, I need to keep it discreet though ok? My girlfriend can't find out. Fine, I'll be discreet. We swap pics, including crucially his face pic. Later that afternoon I travel for an hour across London and I arrive at his place when suddenly he cancels on me. An hour of travel and I'm right there outside the door of his apartment block and he's like no can do sorry. I was beside myself with anger.

A couple of minutes later, coincidentally, a woman leaves the apartment building, and I think right, fuck it. I smile at her and try to politely ask her if she knows this guy - show her his face pic from my phone, tell her his name's Mike. Oh yeah, I know him... well I know his girlfriend really. Well I say you tell Mike that escort rent boys don't like being called up then cancelled on at the last minute!

Turned tail and stormed off, leaving her to make whatever conclusions she wanted to. God knows what happened next but this was one flake I definitely blocked!

I was so fucking angry!

Edited January 21, 2019 by barejackbro3

[Guest Dickmagnet]

4 hours ago, PozTemptation said:

I took that advise, and have never gone back to apps since. I keep my BBRT profile acitive only to direct guys I meet over to it from here, and I put my BBRT location in the town, where I go to the bathhouse.  I just say come and join me, if they show they show, if they don't they don't.

i do exactly the same, cannot be wasting my time on these flakes & in Belgium there are plenty of flakes. from chat sites like bull chat to profile sites like bbrt or romeo they are everywhere. i almost never make a date online unless it's a fucker that has loaded me up previously so i know he is real otherwise move along & prove me your credentials yes i will ask for references from other bttm's who you have fucked the same goes for crappy fucks. if i hear a whisper of a crap fuck i will block you plain & simple.

[Pozbtm4breeding]

On 1/18/2019 at 7:02 PM, travelingbi said:

Flakes and noshows make me crazy. I just had a breed & feed. 5 guys on BBRT asked for an invite to my sex party. Of those 5, only one showed up. I posted several times on Doublelist. Of the 8 guys from Doublelist that said they're coming, only 2 showed up. And 2 guys from Grindr that said they were "On their way", never showed up. In total of over 15 guys that said they would show up, only 5 guys showed. And 2 were guys I'd met previously. Lot's of game playing that I don't understand. 

 

I completely agree! I travel and have hosted sex parties on bbrt and 90% are no shows!

Typical messages I receive:

Him: “how many loads do you have in yet?”.

Me: “none yet”

Him: “let me know when you get a couple of loads in and I will come over”

 

Him: “how many guys are there?”

Me: “none but a couple are on the way”

Him: “let me know when others are there”

???

 

[Guest arseontap]

1 hour ago, Pozbtm4breeding said:

I completely agree! I travel and have hosted sex parties on bbrt and 90% are no shows!

Typical messages I receive:

Him: “how many loads do you have in yet?”.

Me: “none yet”

Him: “let me know when you get a couple of loads in and I will come over”

 

Him: “how many guys are there?”

Me: “none but a couple are on the way”

Him: “let me know when others are there”

???

 

Same experience as I travel a bit and it's nice to set some play up. I have had 15 accept party invites and none turn up or even message to say anything. 

[Ocelot2000]

I guess it is easier here in LA. Especially around West Hollywood and with BBRT. There are flakes of course but for every flake that puts their names down for parties there are those that do not put there names down and go, or they put their names from other sites. There's always dick to go around. I do not do one on one meetups unless I know the guy from parties or they live around the corner (most do). As others have said, if I am off to Slammer, I just post on BBRT I am going there, come join in. I do get some "want to come by here before, or after" I just say no, if you want this, come to Slammer. I go there or to whatever party, have fun, come home. I do the same when I am in London, although that city has WAY too many bottoms. I so prefer it when I am in LA

 

Edited January 22, 2019 by Ocelot2000

[tallslenderguy]

Flakes were pretty much non-existent prior to internet 'hook-up' sites.  i lived in Virgina Beach/Norfolk (coincidently the largest Naval base in the world ? ) There were a couple of parks that i never left without hooking. And rest rooms? Damn, there were several where i could get fucked all day. Of course, there was vice cops to worry about, sex was easy, plentiful and instant.  That was during the 80's and 90's. Those same places are still there, but cruising just doesn't happen there  anymore. 

 

[tallslenderguy]

curiously, i have had FB's flake on me too. An anonymous hookup is easier for me to rationalize as a closeted guy who chickens out last minute or who just gets off on the talk.  A guys who's hooked with me on several occasions really has no excuse, it just simply inconsiderate self absorbed asshatery.  It takes 10 seconds to send a text saying "sorry, can't make it."   It's especially immature when they are the one that contacts me and asks for the hook up, then flake.  i think the buffer of cyberspace makes it easier for guys to be jerks

[versamarried]

Flakes/no shows are bad but nothing is worse for your cumslut ego when a top shows up and upon starting up the action cannot get it up. Decides they are just not into the scene and peaces out. I cannot figure out the mindset of gong to all the trouble of messaging and confirming the type of scene they are into and actually showing up only to have performance anxiety for some reason. 

[rawsatyr]

I have had a few TOTAL FLAKES or no-shows, who say ON MY WAY, and never show. Guys who I recognize as total sluts from the past> Most recently I had the first flake from bbrt who on day 3 (I told him, "dude I'm working!") of our prolonged 'courtship'  (on bbrt and later in phone messages) became progressively more paranoid about the pictures... if they are recent or whatever or me at all, the kind of paranoia I recall from the days of GAY.com... Whatever happened to that app anyway? They really messed up back in like 2006 when they changed format - so much fun, so much non-stop action! I even met my husband on there and lots of fun guys (tricks) who I'm still friends with. Even the first time I EVER took a random bareback cock in a threeway with two strangers, without questions... simply because the guy has such a gorgeous PORN-COCK, you know, cut, flaring head, shaped a bit like a saddle, the kind of cock that just makes me weak... and he filled me up like a penata with his jizz...

But with the paranoia and flakiness I find that DRUGS are squarely part of the equation... TINA to be precise. One hot fuck whom I haven't boinked yet (as I was expecting to get topped by him) turns out to be an easily distractable tweaker always looking for the next free bump. Meth rules his life! Can't get hard, too bad, so cute, and is always fidgeting on his I-phone for apps, porn and messages wide open... distracted. And my seasoned fuck-buddy who has topped VIRTUALLY EVERYBODY in the scene here in town warned me not to leave out cash or credit-cards as the (fairly young) guy already has a criminal case pending where he stole from an old lady/customer at the Home Depot where he worked... 

Another flake (with hunky man-pics and huge cock)  wanted me to leave the front-door open, be ass up and who knows what. Then did the next day he said he had to HELP SOME FRIEND then something about a 'fire' the next day (with PROOF of smouldering pictures) and then eventually tells me 'you would reject me anyways, as  those pics are me three years ago BEFORE the bad accident. I weigh 300lbs and ugly now and nobody likes that!' I told me, whoa dude am I on some 'hidden camera prank show?' He said: "WHAT? I don't get it!"

To a degree I'm enjoying the 'trouble-maker' high-risk encounters. On the fun of flaky side as I see my 'fuck mentors' taking chances and thrill-rides 24/7... so when I have free time during the day, I find that I get more action just stopping by one of them. There is already action lined up there and I can slip right in... 90% of the time; as top, bottom, threeways, fourways... I will even do guys who aren't MY TYPE at all. As long as they are fun, forward, raging hard-on or smooth ass... no questions asked... lewd, goofing around, buck-naked... sometimes the alpha (home-owner) egging me on like in a SKETCHYSEX frat-house with "HEY, we are in the bed-room! Why you still have your clothes on?" My favorite fuck-buddy knows how to sort the flakes out from the champs. And he told me not to respond to the ones TOO CLOSE to his house on grindr!!! Says 'a bird doesn't shit in its own nest!'

I almost wished there were more total strangers in the bunch but turns out, at least half I'm already friends with on Facebook or fucking them one time we end up being fuck friends... but I think it is the 'law-of-nature' that as a predator hunting for prey, most get away... even a lion only takes down something on every 7 or 8 chases. Or like whores making a living sucking cock who hail from the curb for suitors! lol You just have to develop a jaded sluttiness... and roll with the flow. 

[phukhole]

It's always a problem.  I've had guys flake on me ...and in a couple of cases, I've "flaked" on them.  In my defense, these are the guys that are hot and heavy for an hour, then when it comes time to give me their address, <crickets>.  They come back on a couple hours later and ask where I disappeared to.  <huh?>  I kind of think of it as my 1/8th rule:  1/2 will be interested, but not available right now (fair enough). 1/4 will be interested and free, but not interested enough to actually meet (aggravating and time-consuming). 1/8 will be looking to keep partying and may or may not remember being interested (annoying) and remaining 1/8 will be a combination of strict tops (when I want to top), power bottoms (when I want to bottom), compatible but geographically inconvenient, and ready and willing right now (the holy grail of hook ups).

 

[travelingbi]

On 1/21/2019 at 5:51 PM, Pozbtm4breeding said:

I completely agree! I travel and have hosted sex parties on bbrt and 90% are no shows!

Typical messages I receive:

Him: “how many loads do you have in yet?”.

Me: “none yet”

Him: “let me know when you get a couple of loads in and I will come over”

 

Him: “how many guys are there?”

Me: “none but a couple are on the way”

Him: “let me know when others are there”

???

 

Exactly. Not one of the guys that have asked me those questions have ever actually shown up.