Versatility: a turn-on or a turn-off?

[eurotopnyc]

I'm a total top and I prefer fucking total bottoms, but wouldn't say no to a hot vers guy. Total bottoms are so sexy though :-)

Absolutely. Total bottoms are incredibly sexy - a beautiful gift to the world.

[PhoenixGeoff]

To paraphrase Woody Allen, "Versatility immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."

Oftentimes I just want to get laid. I don't care how and I'm not focused on who does what. I just want sex.

Just out of curiosity for guys like eurotopnyc, most versatile guys have absolutely no trouble whatsoever with sticking to just one role or the other for a particular scene. I totally understand someone who's a total top wanting the guy he's with to be a total bottom for him. But what is there about knowing that the guy is only a bottom (or for bottoms, that he's only a top) that really gets you going?

[evilqueerpig]

My first man taught me the joys of being versatile, among other things, and I'm grateful to him for that. A true 50/50, I'm just as comfortable breeding as I am getting bred, and the same hold true for cocksucking. The important thing is that ALL parties involved enjoy themselves.

[Guest slobbvers]

Exactly evilqueerpig. When guys ask whether I'm a top or bottom I say both. Why limit your pleasure?

[eurotopnyc]

To paraphrase Woody Allen, "Versatility immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."

Oftentimes I just want to get laid. I don't care how and I'm not focused on who does what. I just want sex.

Just out of curiosity for guys like eurotopnyc, most versatile guys have absolutely no trouble whatsoever with sticking to just one role or the other for a particular scene. I totally understand someone who's a total top wanting the guy he's with to be a total bottom for him. But what is there about knowing that the guy is only a bottom (or for bottoms, that he's only a top) that really gets you going?

Good question. Overall I would say the mental side of sex is just as important as the physical side to me. I'm very turned on by dichotomies and I find it very arousing to know that I'm with a bottom who dedicates himself to the role completely and who is willing to go all out for his top. I've found that generally total bottoms - meaning not just those who can stay in bottom mode for a single session, but those who are true total bottoms - are incredibly skilled and gratifying sexually. But, as I said, I think in the end it's more about the mental side - the fetish of knowing that I'm with someone who has made a willful decision to subjugate his own penile gratification to those of other men.

[nude_tomBS]

I tend to be more on the bottom side but I also like to top in the right situation (esp. with younger, smoothly shaved guys). What I hate most is to be set as a top just because of the size of my cock. Okay, it may be a bit above average but does that alone qualify me as a top?

[PumaParTyBeasT]

It doesn't really matter that much to me. Then again, I'm versatile myself, so it doesn't matter to me what the other guys is. I just love to get off. Whether it be by unloading deep in a bottom or having my prostate pounded by a top.

[TotalBottom]

Good question. Overall I would say the mental side of sex is just as important as the physical side to me. I'm very turned on by dichotomies and I find it very arousing to know that I'm with a bottom who dedicates himself to the role completely and who is willing to go all out for his top. I've found that generally total bottoms - meaning not just those who can stay in bottom mode for a single session, but those who are true total bottoms - are incredibly skilled and gratifying sexually. But, as I said, I think in the end it's more about the mental side - the fetish of knowing that I'm with someone who has made a willful decision to subjugate his own penile gratification to those of other men.

Yeah, the mental side of it is a big part of what motivates me. I like being a total bottom and letting guys know it. I enjoy being fucked by versatile guys but I'm especially turned on by total tops -- the fetish of having the emphasis on top's cock and knowing that he only fucks.

[squaredolphin]

I describe myself as versatile because the kind of sex I have depends on how I feel and who I'm with at any one time. I've had sessions where I'm a complete pig bottom, simply squirming to get bred, begging to get seeded and pigging out on cum. But on other occassions my cock is so hard and my balls so heavy that all I want to do is plunge into any hole that presnts itself. And of course there's every sess in between. The key for me is being in the moment, tapping into my sexual desire at that moment and being as open and honest and free with it as possible. I tend also to connect better with guys who appear at least to reciprocate in a similar way. For me (and I'm quite happy that we're all different) its just important that guys are getting sexed up with other guys.

[JustProwling]

When I first came out and started making gay friends, I heard a joke about how "Versatile" just means "I'm a bottom who can't suck a cock properly". In my experience (and from what I've heard from my top friends), it's a pretty accurate statement.

I am a bottom, on my profiles I make it clear I am a bottom, and if a guy says he is interested in topping me (or having me suck his cock) I expect him to take on the top role during our encounter. I have had several vers guys swear up and down they are just interested in topping me, that they understood I am a total bottom; then they come over, we get naked, and suddenly it's "Wow your cock is so big! Can I blow you? Will you fuck me? Please? I wanna try sitting on that big cock! I know I said I was a top but I have a thing for uncut guys. Your cock is really big, you should at least try topping this once!" and so on. It's infuriating and I have kicked guys out of my apartment for pulling that crap.

It's like ordering a steak and having the waitress try to serve you a salad instead, then pretending she doesn't understand why you're suddenly telling the manager she needs to be fired. Pisses me off. I refuse to play with guys if their profile says anything other than "Top" or "Prefer to Top", because I got so fucking tired of all the supposedly "100% Versatile" guys refusing to do anything but bottom.

Completely agree with this, in each and every way.  It's like vers guys are cool, just not cool for ME.  I'm looking for a breeder TOP, not a "breeder" who really wants to be a fuck-bitch, in the back of his mind.  That mentality just doesn't work for me and turns me COMPLETELY off.  I'll find a bitch to use, if that's what my lust desires, but when it comes to ME being bred, I ONLY desire real, total breeding tops.  That includes oral too.  If you have the desire and mentality of wanting ANY of your holes penetrated as a fuck-hole, then that's exactly how I view you.  And other fuck-holes are just inadequate for my personal desires.

[wood]

Completely agree with this, in each and every way.  It's like vers guys are cool, just not cool for ME.  I'm looking for a breeder TOP, not a "breeder" who really wants to be a fuck-bitch, in the back of his mind.  That mentality just doesn't work for me and turns me COMPLETELY off.  I'll find a bitch to use, if that's what my lust desires, but when it comes to ME being bred, I ONLY desire real, total breeding tops.  That includes oral too.  If you have the desire and mentality of wanting ANY of your holes penetrated as a fuck-hole, then that's exactly how I view you.  And other fuck-holes are just inadequate for my personal desires.

I want to agree, but I have had way too many circumstances where for one reason or another the other person being a top or bottom, just doesn't work.  

 

A perfect example is a hot lil shorty that I went to fuck the other day.  He said he was 100% bottom, and I was cool with that, he was just my type of bottom.  Well long story short, I get there, and try for 30 mins to fuck him in everyway possible, but he just couldn't take dick.  So what was I supposed to do? His dick was hard so I jumped on.  Even one of my good FB's who is mostly a bottom has been topping more recently simply because it is still fun.  

 

I know its different for everyone, but my desire to top or bottom is EXTREMELY mood, and even time of day dependent, so it helps to be able to do both.      

[JustProwling]

I want to agree, but I have had way too many circumstances where for one reason or another the other person being a top or bottom, just doesn't work.  

 

A perfect example is a hot lil shorty that I went to fuck the other day.  He said he was 100% bottom, and I was cool with that, he was just my type of bottom.  Well long story short, I get there, and try for 30 mins to fuck him in everyway possible, but he just couldn't take dick.  So what was I supposed to do? His dick was hard so I jumped on.  Even one of my good FB's who is mostly a bottom has been topping more recently simply because it is still fun.  

 

I know its different for everyone, but my desire to top or bottom is EXTREMELY mood, and even time of day dependent, so it helps to be able to do both.      

I hear ya loud and clear.  Generally speaking, I know it's AWESOME being vers, simply because there are so many more options and physically, it all still feels good.  But with that said, different guys obviously have different mentalities, and mentally, a dude that seeks dick is just a "step down" to me. 

 

To add to that, I ALWAYS see these guys advertising just how vers they are, but in the very next breath, they talk about wanting tops, vers/tops, and other vers.  If that's the case, why aren't they ALSO seeking bottoms?  It ALWAYS goes back to them having dick as their preference, not ASS.  Ultimately, if a "vers" guy has to choose between getting with a total top or total bottom, 99 times out of 100, they're gonna choose the total top.  And not only that, they choose the top with eagerness and enthusiasm, because they'd rather be that hole getting mounted like a bitch in heat, when it boils down to it.  OVERWHELMINGLY, vers guys are NOT 50/50 equal opportunity.  To me, they're basically just another bottom who simply likes his dick to be stimulated more.  So again, if you have taking dick in the back OR forefront of your mind, then I'm gonna view you as the dick-taking bitch you really wanna be.  And dick-taking bitches just aren't good enough to mount me.  That's not the mentality or energy my holes & psyche need or desire.

 

To be clear, YES I absolutely know I'm generalizing.  No I don't think there's anything WRONG with being vers, in the general sense (I'm jealous of all the more sexual opportunities they have).  I'm simply saying that this is how my mind works, when it comes to guys and versatility.  Hell, I've been vers and still am vers and/or top with other activities, but different guys serve different purposes for me.  And when it comes to mounting and breeding...well, a bitch is still a bitch...and my cunt doesn't need another bitch trying to mount it...it needs a real TOTAL TOP BREEDER.  Vers guys should just stop the charade, with the "I'm 50/50 vers" crap, cause everything being equal, they're FAR MORE LIKELY to choose BEING mounted, over DOING the mounting.

Edited January 6, 2015 by JustProwling

[Bottomhole]

I must honestly say for me, mostly it's a turn off. I've made it clear that I bottom on hook-up sites and usually when I meet up with vers guys they always try to get me to fuck them, which completely turns me off, because I prefer tops to be more dominant. Not all the time but mostly. Still though, the guy is more important and wouldn't pre judge. Still meet vers guys though.

[drscorpio]

I am a total bottom. From my perspective, the pros of a vers guy is that it's hot for me to think that the anonymous guy who is about to breed me was getting bred by someone else last night. The cons are that sometimes I end up with a guy who doesn't really want to top and wants to try to convince me to fuck him "just this once." 

 

That said, any man who wants to fuck and breed me is welcome anytime. 

[bttmsubslut]

turn off for me. i prefer 100% dom tops.